Musical performing groups are a "team sport." It's no more important for every athlete to show up than it is for every musician to show up.
The problem is that every single director of every single children's organization thinks their activity is the most important thing in the universe.
As a parent of a child with a number of talents and interests, it drives me crazy. We don't schedule things where there will be an obvious conflict, but sometimes things happen. You usually don't have the entire season's schedule for all the activities when the time comes to sign up. So, despite your best efforts, sometimes my daughter's orchestra concert is scheduled at the same time as an athletic event.
It would be nice if the directors didn't act as if civilization as we know it would come to a screaming halt if somebody has a conflict.
When my kid was in 6th grade, two of the less mentally stable teachers in the school decided to have a school musical. They summoned all the parents to an evening meeting on very short notice. They said that if the kid wanted to be in the musical, he or she could not miss a single rehearsal for any reason. If you needed to take your kid to the doctor, that was no excuse (I guess it's better if they missed school time), no matter how far ahead medical appointments were already sheduled out.
One of the teachers then said how she knew she'd have a hard time getting boys to participate, but that if they were interested, they should take the rehearsal schedule to the coach and tell the coach to rearrange games around the teacher's play.
The two of them were such tyrants that I told dd she couldn't be in the musical because it conflicted with her violin lessons. She was sad, but she understood.
About three weeks before the play the teacher called me at work to see if dd could take a part as somebody quit. I told her dd could, but she would be missing rehearsal every Tuesday for her violin lesson. Oddly enough, she thought dd could manage anyway.
Excellent post and exactly what I am talking about.
Wednesday night is prayer meeting night. A big deal, especially in small Baptist towns. No school functions on Wednesday nights.
I honestly wondered when I read this if you were serious! There's no bench or second string in musical ensembles.
At almost every team sporting event, there is another player who could play a position if the person who usually plays it isn't there. Maybe they aren't as good as the usual player, but they can still play. Is that not the case on your son's team? Do they not have any extra players? That isn't the case in a band. In many cases, there is literally one person playing a particular instrument or a specific part. It isn't a matter of the sub not being as talented as the primary player. There simply are no extra people waiting to sub in for someone.
