Bad tablemate during dinner

[xiphoid76]

Hi there,
We are going on our 7th Disney cruise next month and can not wait. We have been very fortunate on 5 of them to have excellent tablemates during dinner - however, we had a very bad experience on our last one with a homophobic tablemate. We are a gay couple in our 40s without kids and Disney always pairs us with other couples without kids. In some magical way, they have usually paired us with other gay couples (I do not know how they do this, or if there is just a higher number of childless couples who are gay on DCL?).
We complained to the maitre'd who said there were no other tables available but we could come back at dinner time to see if there were some no-shows (people who went to Remy) and he could get us a table - he was quite rude to us. He told us to go to guest services who did nothing but direct us back to him. They called and left him a message for him to call us with new table reservations, but he never did. Then when we showed up he said he called us (he never did). He was able to secure a table for us, although it was nearby the other table. We really wanted to eat in the dining room that night and were upset about the change in waiters as we liked our other waiters. We ended up having room service the other nights which was actually enjoyable, but I do like the atmosphere at dinner in the dining rooms. We also left a tip for the new waiters and the old ones as well.
Has anyone else had bad experiences with tablemates? Was there a better way we should have handled this? I want to eat in the dining room and I like having tablemates because I love making new friends, but this last experience burned my husband pretty good - he is more introverted anyway.
Hopefully this next cruise will go better - if not, we haven't tried Cabanas for dinner yet

 

[PrincessShmoo]

Hi there,
We are going on our 7th Disney cruise next month and can not wait. We have been very fortunate on 5 of them to have excellent tablemates during dinner - however, we had a very bad experience on our last one with a homophobic tablemate. We are a gay couple in our 40s without kids and Disney always pairs us with other couples without kids. In some magical way, they have usually paired us with other gay couples (I do not know how they do this, or if there is just a higher number of childless couples who are gay on DCL?).
We complained to the maitre'd who said there were no other tables available but we could come back at dinner time to see if there were some no-shows (people who went to Remy) and he could get us a table - he was quite rude to us. He told us to go to guest services who did nothing but direct us back to him. They called and left him a message for him to call us with new table reservations, but he never did. Then when we showed up he said he called us (he never did). He was able to secure a table for us, although it was nearby the other table. We really wanted to eat in the dining room that night and were upset about the change in waiters as we liked our other waiters. We ended up having room service the other nights which was actually enjoyable, but I do like the atmosphere at dinner in the dining rooms. We also left a tip for the new waiters and the old ones as well.
Has anyone else had bad experiences with tablemates? Was there a better way we should have handled this? I want to eat in the dining room and I like having tablemates because I love making new friends, but this last experience burned my husband pretty good - he is more introverted anyway.
Hopefully this next cruise will go better - if not, we haven't tried Cabanas for dinner yet

We've never had to ask for a change of tablemates. But, if you need to, the way to handle it is by talking to your head server. If you don't get satisfaction from him/her, then the next step up would be the Hotel Services officer, I believe.

 

[Chirple]

I'm not sure if this is a current trend on all of the DCL ships and will continue, but we just got off the Magic yesterday morning and had no tablemates. We put in a request for a specific server (and this was granted). When we arrived at our table, we noticed it was a 4-top (we are a couple) with two place settings removed. I started to look around the dining room and noticed that smaller tables were everywhere containing single families. I asked our server about it, and she said that so many people were requesting their own tables that they reconfigured the setup.

 

[ldo]

We had 2 experiences that caused us now to either do anytime dining (not on DCL), so paired alone or with ransom persons each night or ask for a table to ourselves, although we really enjoyed many cruises with large table and getting to know others. On one cruise, we were seated with persons who spoke little English--thus no dining conversation and on DCL where we asked to be seated alone a family of 5 with older teens, but the maitre de "begged" us to accept a table for 8 with a family of 3. He said 2 other tables had turned them away. They had a son near our kids' ages, so we said OK. We are decent conversationalists, but it was a tough 4 nights on the Dream and we had nothing in common to talk about (we have chatted up various persons for 15+ cruises) and these tablemates just went on and on about various random things. We just went on the Magic and wanted to share a table, but decided we could not "risk" a week like the 4 night Dream, so requested a table just for us.
Bottom line, either risk it again, or request a table alone. And, I would never just eat room service. It's your cruise, for which you paid dearly. If your tablemates are that uncomfortable, they can also request a change.

 

[Dug720]

Hi there,
We are going on our 7th Disney cruise next month and can not wait. We have been very fortunate on 5 of them to have excellent tablemates during dinner - however, we had a very bad experience on our last one with a homophobic tablemate. We are a gay couple in our 40s without kids and Disney always pairs us with other couples without kids. In some magical way, they have usually paired us with other gay couples (I do not know how they do this, or if there is just a higher number of childless couples who are gay on DCL?).
We complained to the maitre'd who said there were no other tables available but we could come back at dinner time to see if there were some no-shows (people who went to Remy) and he could get us a table - he was quite rude to us. He told us to go to guest services who did nothing but direct us back to him. They called and left him a message for him to call us with new table reservations, but he never did. Then when we showed up he said he called us (he never did). He was able to secure a table for us, although it was nearby the other table. We really wanted to eat in the dining room that night and were upset about the change in waiters as we liked our other waiters. We ended up having room service the other nights which was actually enjoyable, but I do like the atmosphere at dinner in the dining rooms. We also left a tip for the new waiters and the old ones as well.
Has anyone else had bad experiences with tablemates? Was there a better way we should have handled this? I want to eat in the dining room and I like having tablemates because I love making new friends, but this last experience burned my husband pretty good - he is more introverted anyway.
Hopefully this next cruise will go better - if not, we haven't tried Cabanas for dinner yet

I had a similar situation as a solo cruiser in Feb 2015. It seemed like they did a "singles dump" where two men each traveling solo and myself (female, gay, solo) were put at a table together. I don't know that they were homophobic (we didn't get into our personal lives, and TBH I suspect at least one was "family") they were definitely much more conservative than I and while they had a lot of interests in common, I was completely shut out of any conversation. And the conservative nature of the conversation made me very uncomfortable.

My second night I went to Palo, so I didn't stress anything that night. The third night, I had thought I'd try Cabanas - and if that was ok just stick with that for the other nights and try to get another Palo reservation for the final night. But I discovered that for Cabanas it was like they took my least favorite items from each menu and put them together. Si I left. Luckily I'd gone in time I could stop by my assigned dining room while first seating was going on. I spoke with one of the managers and she said to check in with her or one of the other managers and she would have a new table for me at my seating. Yes, I did have to change servers - but I ended up with an amazing team (I've actually put a request for my assistant server to be on my team for my upcoming Fantasy cruise), and I had the same head server so I was able to have him convey to my first team that it was NOT them at all. (He told me towards the end of the cruise that he had actually anticipated me wanting to move based on my demeanor that first night and how isolated I seemed.)

I am now gluten-free, and have requested my own table because of that (cross-contamination is not a huge issue for me, but I figure it's just easier). I would think that you could certainly request your own table - adding the circumstances or not - and still be able to meet other people as the tables aren't that far apart. If that would make your husband more comfortable that might be what I'd suggest doing.

Good luck!!

 

[redsonja76]

Ohhhhh that makes me so dang mad!!!!! I wish I had been your table mate. I'm so very sorry that happened to you and your husband. Not cool at all. I don't have any table changing advice because I've never done it, but I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am that happened.

 

[FigmentSpark]

You should have shown up early every night, waved them over, smiling and made sure to hold hands and make 'lovey' looks at each other, maybe even give each other a taste of your desserts in an oh so cutsy way. I guarantee they wouldn't have shown up the next day.

 

[Carrie in AZ]

I feel really bad that happened to you and that it was handled poorly by DCL personnel. I hope your dining room experiences are much more enjoyable on your next cruise.

 

[Captainkate]

I understand from reading posts here that a private table is not guaranteed, however every time we have requested one, we got one. Having had so many negative experiences with Disney pairing us up with families with children, (I realize they are trying to do something good here, but doesn't always work out) we decided not to put our daughter through that anymore. We always request our own table. Amazing how rude table mates can be.

 

[Sytrace]

Out of our cruises there has only been one time that we were seated with tablemates that we asked to be moved to another table.

The very first night we were seated at an 8 top and the other family had teens of similar ages, but conversation was stilted on both our parts. So we mentioned to the head server that we would like to move to another table if possible. He replied that they would not be able to accomodate that so we went to Guest services after dinner and requested a change there.
We were moved the next night to a table of our own with new serving team and head server. It was the same dining rotation but we were in another part of the dining room so we never saw the serving team or the family of 4 again. As a side note, I made sure I explained to the GS manager that it was uncomfortable for us to be seated with strangers for or cruise and though we liked our current serving team, we would understand if we could not stay with them. It was also explained that the serving team was wonderful and the guests were quite nice, but our personal preference is to dine as a family of 4 on our own. I did not want our servers to feel as if they did something wrong, so I made it a point to talk to them on the 3rd evening and let them know that they had done nothing wrong, but that is just how we enjoy our dining experience. They still got their gratuity (plus a bit extra for their kindness) for the first night of course.

I am sorry that you felt uncomfortable. And that you had a hard time finding a solution. And I really hope that your next cruise is amazing and helps offset this experience.

 

[Suttonmama1]

I'm sorry you had to deal with that too. We were recently on the Fantasy. We love dining with other families as our daughter is an only child and can't wait to talk someone's ears off! Our last cruise we were seated with a family with three kids and we literally stayed until they ran us off! Looking forward to the same thing this time but our table mates (mom, dad, daughter) spoke very little English and were apparently unaware they would be dining with another family. This made it very awkward for everyone. I went to head server early the next day and we were moved, more for their sake than for ours! Best advice is go to head server and then guest services.

 

[115belladonna]

Hi there,
We are going on our 7th Disney cruise next month and can not wait. We have been very fortunate on 5 of them to have excellent tablemates during dinner - however, we had a very bad experience on our last one with a homophobic tablemate. We are a gay couple in our 40s without kids and Disney always pairs us with other couples without kids. In some magical way, they have usually paired us with other gay couples (I do not know how they do this, or if there is just a higher number of childless couples who are gay on DCL?).
We complained to the maitre'd who said there were no other tables available but we could come back at dinner time to see if there were some no-shows (people who went to Remy) and he could get us a table - he was quite rude to us. He told us to go to guest services who did nothing but direct us back to him. They called and left him a message for him to call us with new table reservations, but he never did. Then when we showed up he said he called us (he never did). He was able to secure a table for us, although it was nearby the other table. We really wanted to eat in the dining room that night and were upset about the change in waiters as we liked our other waiters. We ended up having room service the other nights which was actually enjoyable, but I do like the atmosphere at dinner in the dining rooms. We also left a tip for the new waiters and the old ones as well.
Has anyone else had bad experiences with tablemates? Was there a better way we should have handled this? I want to eat in the dining room and I like having tablemates because I love making new friends, but this last experience burned my husband pretty good - he is more introverted anyway.
Hopefully this next cruise will go better - if not, we haven't tried Cabanas for dinner yet

Hi. I am so sorry that you had some homophobic couple at our table. It sounds like it was their loss. we have gone to Cabanas for dinner. The menu is the same as MDR except they add extra. The grilled RIb eye was delicious, they also had NY Strip. The servers are being trained to eventually work in MDR. Our server was from Dominican Republic. He spoke English but his accent was thick so I thought he was speaking Spanish. I hope you and your husband enjoy it.

 

[tink1970]

So very sorry to hear that I don't know why people just can't be kind (or at the least, polite). Ugh.

 

[ludari]

I too have had a bad table mate once but nowhere near your unfortunate situation. Anyway, I just asked the head server to be changed and it was done. Since that bad experience I have always requested my own table and received it. I'm shocked they couldn't accommodate your request.

 

[ndavis]

We've only been on one cruise so far (second is booked for next year we were there with our 2 year old, I didn't mind sitting with another family, and were paired up with a couple with a child the same age. We figured we were on vacation and let our son eat whatever he wanted within reason and get dessert, etc. The other couple nearly force fed their child who wouldn't eat, it was so uncomfortable. They didn't want him to feed himself and make a mess, wouldn't let him choose what he ate, he would watch our son an cry. Then they complained in front of him (granted hopefully he didn't get the gist) that he couldn't go to the nursery for free and they had to bring him to dinner every night. It was awful, and I felt so bad for that child. We tried twice and then did Cabana's/poolside the rest of the time. Cabana's was decent, but not as good as the MDR.

 

[Lilylogan]

I forgot to request a table just for our family and we leave in a week- I wonder if its too late. We are a party of 7 so maybe we'll be alone anyways.

DH and I have cruised on Disney a lot and have always been lucky with tablemates thank goodness. One time we were with another couple and they said "we are on this cruise to help us decide if we should have kids or not" - I almost spit my drink out when they said that- I thought they were joking but they were dead serious lol

 

[scgustafson]

We have been on 8 DCL cruises varying from 4-night Bahamas to 12-night Med and British Isles cruises. On our first 6 cruises, we have always been paired with a family with a child close to our daughter's age and it has gone well, on cruise number 7, we travelled with friends of the family, so we requested to sit with them. It was not until our last cruise this October on the inaugural 8-night Western Caribbean that we had our first bad experience with our tablemates. Our tablemates were a grandmother and her 14 and 12 year old granddaughters from Peru. While they did speak more English than we did Spanish, any conversations between us were bordering on painful and most of the night was filled with silences between our two families. After the first night, my wife and I discussed changing tables, and then brought our 12 year old daughter into the discussion. We agreed as a family to give it another night, which went a tad better, so we decided to stick it out. However, the situation did not ever improve, and we feel like the lack of English-speaking from our tablemates, led our entire table to have a cursory relationship with our servers, neither of whom spoke Spanish. Unlike previous cruises where our servers would have in depth conversations with us and our tablemates, most of our interaction was limited to dinner-related items. Post-cruise, we decided that we will never subject ourselves to bad tablemates again, and if the first night we don't click, we will request a new table right after that first night's dinner.
I feel bad for the OP and the other posters who had to retreat to other dining accommodations due to their dining companions.

 

[PrincessTrisha]

I'm very sorry that DCL let you down. I find it difficult to believe that there was no way for the maitre'd to accommodate a change to a different table especially based on the circumstances.

 

[Macmaro]

I forgot to request a table just for our family and we leave in a week- I wonder if its too late. We are a party of 7 so maybe we'll be alone anyways

It never hurts to call. You can always check when you get on board where they do changes to dining. We have requested a table for just our family on the last 7 cruises and always check (always granted by the way) right after lunch the first day. Our first cruise was just my wife and I and we were seated with 2 other couples. They were both very nice but we are not into making small talk over a meal. We adopted our daughter shortly after that first cruise and have always asked to be sat alone. Often times our daughter will have spent the day in the kids club. Dinner is our time to catch up on our day. Just like at home. I'm much more interested in getting to hear about my family's day than other folks' day.

 

[Mousemommy1]

I'm not sure what would have been better protocol, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry that you had to deal with that. Gross.