Bad Mothers' Handbook - Chapter 12

wilma-bride

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DCL, Here We Come (or Who Knew There Was a Distinct Lack of Restrooms Between Orlando and Port Canaveral?)

Despite the late night, we were up bright and early and, although we were sad to be leaving AKV, we were all very excited about the cruise. I was a little nervous since I really wasn’t sure if Nat and John were going to enjoy it and, since it was my idea, I felt as if it would be my fault if they didn’t. I was very worried about the cruise, I've wanted to do it for ages thanks to reading all the trippies on here but as I do suffer from motion sickness I was worried that I wouldn't enjoy it

I popped down the corridor to remind Nat that she needed to have her passports in her hand luggage and no sharp items. Then it was back to the room to pack the last few bits and call Bell Services to collect the cases we were leaving behind (they were transferring them to Bay Lake Towers for us). Nat, John and the kids arrived at our room shortly after and John and Gary took the cruise luggage down to the car. In hindsight, I should have taken much more care of our packing, I left behind a few things!

I must admit, I’d been a bit worried that there might be an atmosphere today, after yesterday’s fracas, but everything was fine and we were soon chatting and laughing like normal. Once John and Gary returned, we all paid visits to the bathroom and then made our way down to the car. I know I said I was a sulker but I cant keep my trap shut for that long, especially around Joh.

Soon we were leaving Disney World and, after a quick stop for gas, heading towards Port Canaveral. We must have only been on the road for abut 30 minutes before I realised I needed the loo. At this stage, I wasn’t particularly desperate and thought I would be able to hang on. However, within about 10 minutes the situation had turned critical! As there was a toll coming up, I asked Gary to ask if there were any restrooms nearby. ‘No, sir, says the toll-booth man, there are no restrooms between here and Cocoa Beach’. Gary asked if I wanted him to turn round and go back to find a restroom but I didn’t want to delay us so I said I would be fine. Another 10 minutes down the road I realised I wouldn’t be fine at all and, with 30 miles still to go, I demanded that Gary find a discreet spot to pull over. It sounds funny now, looking back, but at the time I was really concerned. Eventually I spotted a clump of trees on the far right-hand side of the road and screeched at Gary to stop. After threatening Nat and John with dismemberment (or worse) I they so much as attempted to point a camera at me, I ran off behind the trees. This was the point at which the entire situation really did become like a horror film (or slapstick comedy if you are the viewer) when I promptly ran face-first into the biggest cobweb I have ever seen in my life. Picture, if you will, a cross-legged woman hopping and screaming and batting at her face, trying to wipe the stickiest, most disgusting cobweb off her and her clothes while trying desperately not to wet herself. The worst thing was that I knew there had to be a resident of said cobweb somewhere nearby and so I literally had the quickest wee in history, before running back to the Mystery Machine, still trying to rid myself of sticky web. To make it worse, the web was covered in yellow sap (presumably from the trees) and so I was covered in sticky yellow specks. It was the most terrifying experience ever and not one that I am in a hurry to repeat. Needless to say, before the return journey, I limited my liquid intake and made several visits to the restrooms! Omg this was absolutely hilarious, and I have to say Joh's warnings not to take pics were a shame, photo evidence would have been a hoot!

Still, crisis averted and feeling much better, we resumed our journey and it wasn’t long before we were driving over the brow of the hill and could spot the gorgeous Disney Wonder in the distance. It’s probably fair to say that I was a long way from being the most excited member of the party (which makes a nice change). Lol, yes its fair to say the Longstaffs were most excited to finally spot the ship in the distance and wow it was huge!

Having reached the port, Gary dropped us all off outside with our luggage and then went off to park the car. We proceeded into the terminal, ready to check in for our Wonder-ful 3 day cruise. I deposited the girls and Daniel to the side while I checked in, which was very efficient and problem-free. We received our Castaway Club lanyards, which I was (sadly) very excited about. When I went to rejoin the kids, I found Daniel in floods of tears due to the fact that he had left ‘Doggy’, his lifelong companion, in the car. Daniel and Doggy had not been apart for a single night since he was just a few days old so this was a major disaster. Since Gary had been gone for such a long time, I figured there was probably no chance he would want to go back to the car for him, and tried to explain to Daniel that he would have to manage without him but, secretly, I was a little worried. Gary eventually turned up, saying that he’d had to park the car miles away and, in addition, had not had to pay for car parking. The upshot was that there was no way he was going back for Doggy so Daniel was just going to have to do without. Daniel was very brave about doggy I have to say, he took it remarkably well I think

We spent the next hour or so going through the security procedures, registering the kids for the clubs, exploring the terminal and having our photos taken with Captain Mickey.

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Soon, our number was called and it was time to board. The Longstaffs went first, and then we followed behind. It was so lovely to be back on board the Wonder and I almost felt like I’d come home.

We wandered straight up to get lunch from Beach Blanket Buffet. There were massive queues for the food and I remember thinking that the boat generally seemed more crowded than last time we’d cruised (August 2007). After getting our lunch, we eventually managed to find a couple of tables outside (at completely opposite sides of the ship) and sat down to eat. It was such a hot day, it was really uncomfortable and I began to wish we had gone to Parrot Cay. After a few minutes, somebody vacated the table next to us, which was partly in shade so we moved across and I went to fetch Nat and John to join us. It was a very hot day and we were glad to be in the shade at this point. The food was lovely though and not surprisingly John took full advantage (along with Matthew)

After lunch, we wandered around the ship and the kids checked out the pool and the slide. Gary and I went off to check if our stateroom was ready while Nat and John stayed with the kids. We decorated the stateroom doors and took a couple of quick pictures. Although we had booked Cat 12s, we had been upgraded to 9s which we were very happy with.

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Then we returned to keep an eye on the kids while Nat and John checked out their room.

After a couple of pleasant hours spent by the pool, it was time to head back to the room to get ready for the big DIS meet. We were really looking forward to meeting some of the people we’d spent the last few months chatting with on the DIS. Down at the Promenade Lounge, the party was already in full swing when we arrived and we slowly began to put faces to names. It was lovely to finally meet everyone and we took advantage of a poor, unsuspecting CM by getting him to take a group photo (well, actually, more like 14 or 15 group photos since everyone wanted one with their own camera lol). The DIS meet was great fun and, Joh is right, the photos took ages. The poor CM did a great job though. It is fair to say that Denver (the guide dog) was the star of the meet, the kids loved him

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Gradually, people began to slip away to get ready for the lifeboat drill, and we said our goodbyes and headed back to the rooms. Our drill was in the theatre, which was much better than being stood out on the deck, sweating profusely. It really was a very hot day.

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As soon as we’d been dismissed, I handed Gary mine and Daniel’s life jackets and he took them back to the stateroom while Daniel and I headed up to Deck 10 to stake out a spot for the party. I’d advised Nat to do the same and she arrived shortly afterwards so we grabbed a table and some chairs. Soon afterwards, everyone else arrived and Rea and I made a trip to the drinks station to get us all some drinks. I was in need of a cold drink as our lifeboat drill was outside and I was sweltering!

The party was brilliant and we were very pleased to see that Christiaan was our cruise director again. The kids absolutely loved it and, every time I looked at Daniel and Matthew, they had big grins plastered over their faces. When the entertainment staff got all the kids up on the stage, Daniel decided he wanted to go down to deck 9 and get on stage too so Sian said she would take him. Ellie decided to go as well, however, when they got down there Daniel wouldn’t go up on stage without Sian, and Sian didn’t want to go on stage, so they ended up having a little dance next to the stage and then coming back up.

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Once the party was over, we went back to the rooms to get ready for dinner. This is my one and only complaint about the cruise (maybe it’s just the 3-day that is like this) and that is that you constantly seem to be rushing from one thing to the next. Although we had late dinner seating, in order to get ready for dinner before we went to the theatre, we had to get back to the room by about 5, which just seemed really early. However, I always found there didn’t seem to be enough time in between the show and dinner to get changed then. Not really a complaint, to be honest, but I would have preferred a little more time. It did seem a bit rushed, we were trying to cram a lot in I suppose. I loved late seating though.

Tonight’s show was The Golden Mickeys. Although Gary and I had seen this before (and would have possibly skipped it had we been on our own), we wanted everyone to see the shows as the entertainment is one of the best parts of the cruise, in my opinion. We all really enjoyed it and I think Nat and John were very impressed. Yes, we were amazed by the quality of the shows

After the show, we decided to take the kids up to the clubs for an hour or so, to give them a chance to look around. Meanwhile, we had a look around the ship and then went off to deliver the first of our fish extender gifts. We had already received some gifts as well and the girls were very excited to see them.

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We had a great time, running around all over the ship. It was certainly a good way of getting used to the layout.

Dinner tonight was at Animator’s Palate, which I was really pleased about since it is my favourite dining room on the Wonder.

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Our server, Jan, and Assistant Server, Fernando, introduced themselves and we told Jan we were interested in doing the ‘Dine and Play’ scheme, whereby the kids are served with their dinner first and then the counsellors from the kids’ clubs will take them to the clubs so the adults can eat in peace. This sounded like the ideal set-up and we were interested to see how it would work. Fernando took our drinks orders – Nat and I both decided to try a cocktail – while Jan took the kids’ dinner orders, followed by the adults (and teens) appetiser orders.

The kids’ meals came out very quickly, both appetiser and main together, and by the time the Counsellors turned up, the kids had finished eating. Unfortunately, our wait staff seemed a little disorganised and the kids didn’t get a chance to have dessert but we promised them they would get a chance the next night. For those who are interested in the Dine and Play option, this is how it works:

It’s for late seating only. You let your server know you want the kids to eat first so the can go to the clubs. The kids’ meals are brought out first; then, around 9 o’clock, counsellors from each of the clubs will appear at the front of the restaurant. Take your kids up to the counsellor, register them and off they go. Bingo! Enjoy the rest of your meal in total peace. This was a great idea, the kids never got time to get bored at the table and it was nice to enjoy some adult time (and cocktails)

We absolutely loved this arrangement and it worked really well for us. By the time our main course came, the kids had left and the six of us enjoyed the rest of our meal in child-free bliss. It meant that we didn’t feel like we had to rush because the kids were bored.

The girls had arranged to meet some of the DIS teens they’d made friends with and head on up to the teen club, which meant they disappeared around 9.30, leaving the four of us to enjoy dessert. I commented that Sian seemed to be enjoying herself – this was probably the happiest I’d seen her since we’d left home 11 days ago.

Once dinner was done, we decided to head down to Route 66 and see what was going on down there.

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We were just in time to watch Match Your Mate, which was absolutely hilarious. After a couple of drinks, we realised it was almost midnight and time to ‘spring’ the kids from the clubs. As we left Wavebands, Nat and I decided to have a picture taken sat in the porthole. Nat had been really worried that the movement of the ship would bother her, since she is prone to motion sickness but so far she’d been OK. As we sat in the porthole, I glanced outside, saw the water rushing past and said to Nat ‘don’t look down’. Well, of course she did and nearly had a heart attack when she saw the speed we were moving at. Still, despite that, we managed to get a good picture – one of my favourites of the whole trip (my favourite is still to come ;)) Lol, I just had to look down didn't I!! It was worth it though because I love this picture so much

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Once we’d collected the kids, we headed back to our respective staterooms. The girls appeared to still be out – we’d told them they could come back at whatever time they liked as long as they were in the teen club or other public area, not just wandering round the ship. Our navigator had been delivered and, since Daniel was starting to get a bit teary having just remembered that Doggy was still absent, we all hopped into bed to plan our activities for the next day. The girls turned up shortly after and came to give us a run-down of their evening before they disappeared to their stateroom next door.

Daniel got into his own bed and we turned off the light. I think we were all asleep within seconds!

Next: Yo Ho, Yo Ho, a Cruiser’s Life For Me
 
Yay, I've been waiting for your cruise installment :yay:

A fab day girls, with great pics too, but I really wish there had been a pic with the cobweb :rotfl2::rotfl2:

I can't wait to read some more :thumbsup2
 
I think I would have torn my face off going thro' such a disgusting cobweb, Joh - so I'm not going to dwell on your bladder weakness... :rotfl2: :lmao: :rotfl2:

It's so lovely to see the Wonder again!!! :cool1: I don't think I ever get bored of hearing about DCL cruise experiences... :thumbsup2

You're totally right about it feeling hectic - I don't think Sophie or my feet touched the floor when did our 1st cruise!!! And we always seem to rush around on a 7 nighter too - there's just so much going on... :cloud9: We still haven't seen all the shows!

I love that photo of you two in the porthole, BTW!!! :goodvibes
 

I love the idea of the kids going off to a club so that the adults can eat in peace - my idea of heaven.:goodvibes

Great pictures - looks like you had a fab time!
 
Love the picture of you both in the port hole.

Laughed out loud of the thought of you desperate for the loo - what a nightmare though, bumping into a cobweb - good job there were no accidents :rotfl:

What a great idea the Dine and Play is - perfect to think you can eat together then the little ones can go off to the clubs without you having to get up.

Can't wait to read the next instalment.

Tamy
 
Sorry Joh but i was in stitches reading about you+the cobweb :lmao:,but Nat-shame on you for not getting the piccy to go with it :sad2: :laughing:.
Your pics are great,love the one of you ladies in the porthole.Hope Daniel slept ok without Doggy.x.
 
Oh the cobweb situations sounds awful. Great pics cant wait to hear more about the cruise:)
 
Sounds like a brilliant day. Great piccies. I like the idea of the kids being fed early and off to the kids club. Nice to have time to relax without the kids getting bored.:thumbsup2
 
Sounds like a fab day. The pic in the porthole is brilliant and I cringe when I think of the cobweb, yuk, must have been a real dillema, pee or run! Nat must be a good friend Joh, I would have been soooo tempted to take a pic:rotfl:

Tina
 
You descibed the cobweb incident fantastically well and it is one of the funniest things I have read in a long long time :lmao:

Great pics all round giving us a good insight into cruising :thumbsup2
 
Sorry Joh but i was in stitches reading about you+the cobweb :lmao:,but Nat-shame on you for not getting the piccy to go with it :sad2: :laughing:.

I just wasnt brave enough !:rotfl2:

Sounds like a brilliant day. Great piccies. I like the idea of the kids being fed early and off to the kids club. Nice to have time to relax without the kids getting bored.:thumbsup2

it was perfect, the best of both worlds ;)

Nat must be a good friend Joh, I would have been soooo tempted to take a pic:rotfl:

I so am
 
eeek at the spider web, I wouldn't have gone anywear near it.

The cruise looks great.
 
Apart from the journey what a fantastic start to the cruise.

We were on the same cruise as you in August 2007 and it seems so long ago now. Kirsty loved the teen club and we hardly saw her the whole cruise. would love to do the med one some time.

looking forward to reading more



susan
 
:scared1: I would have had a heart attack, so although it's very funny I can only imagine how you felt with the cobweb incident.

I agree about the show & dinner timings, it is a mad rush. We actually missed the Golden Mickeys show on the first night. :rolleyes:
 
LOL at the spider incident!! :lmao:

Joh ~ did you find you enjoyed this cruise even more than your first one?
 
LOL at the spider incident!! :lmao:

Joh ~ did you find you enjoyed this cruise even more than your first one?

Elaine, I think we did enjoy it more than the first for a lot of reasons. Mainly, because we all really needed a bit of 'down time' and, dare I say it, a break from the parks. Obviously, the fact that we were sharing it with our best friends helped a lot too. And the fact that we kind of knew our way around and knew what to expect/what to do helped to make it a better experience.
 











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