Sisterhood I am here to discuss with you the problem men have call UMS.
UMS a.k.a. as Ugly Mood Swings can strike at anytime for any reason. Some common causes are:
Inability to find the remote control
Satellite dish or cable going out during favorite sporting events
Needing to leave easy chair to fetch own beer
Children breathing too noisly in their sleep
Being called to dinner during television programs
Phones ringing
Driving the car and other people having the nerve to be driving on the same roads at the same times
Having to go to work
Having to come home from work
These very stressful events will cause the start of UMS.
During UMS the male will yell colorful metaphors (that your children will repeat later in church and/or in front of your parents), huff & puff, stomp, slam things, and quite possibly throw things, and mutter unintelligably under their breath. If they are in the car, they will also speed up, slow down and use various finger and hand gestures to make sure they have fully communicated their dis-satisfaction with the other drivers failures.
There is a cure for UMS, but until they change the law, it is still considered a felony to kill them. Unlike your pets, you can not put them down just because they have gone rabid.
Love ya Mark, mean it!!!!
Aunty Brat
