Athiests - do you want a funeral?

[dcentity2000]

Funerals always seem to be draped in religion. Accepting this, do the atheists out there on this board want a funeral?



Rich::

 

[Sparx]

I don't see funerals as religious. In my opinion, a funeral is a way to say goodbye, for friends and family of the departed. You COULD make it religious, but you could just as easily make it not religious. You could have friends and family speak instead of a preacher.

I don't see any reason to not have a funeral.

 

[Diabolicdesire]

Nope, I told DH when I die to just dig a hole and stick me in it. I don't want a ceremony or viewing. I also don't want a casket or to be embalmbed either. It really has nothing to do with me being an atheist though.

 

[Honu]

No. We took my father's ashes to Hawaii and put him into the water in a place he loved. It was just me, my DH and my sister. I have asked for the same when I go.

 

[Dakota_Lynn]

I don't want one! I wouldn't say I'm an atheist, though most of my life I have had a lot of doubts about a God; at least in the sense that most people believe. I have asked my family to not have a funeral for me, not to embalm me, and just buy me the cheapest casket on the market and shove me in the ground. I see no point in spending a ton of money for some crazy ceremony. But then I'm very informal. I wouldn't spend money on a wedding either!

I understand the need to say goodbye, however I think having a small gathering at home without the drama of a funeral would be just fine! I've only gone to two funerals in my life (including my dad's) and they struck me as odd. I don't want my dead body out for people to stare at. Eeek! It's just so creepy to me. Death doesn't scare me really. I just don't understand funerals is all.

 

[freckles and boo]

I have requested a cremation, a nice rosewood box, and a plaque somewhere stating I was here and now am gone. If my husband or children or friends want to hold a memorial service to say goodbye and comfort one another, I am all for it. Funerals are for the survivors. However, if one of those survivors invites the clergy to speak, I will assume they don't know me very well.

PS Viewings are creepy.

 

[MzDiz]

I want whatever the folks I leave behind want. They can say whatever they feel like saying, too. What do I care? I won't be able to hear them anyway, so whatever makes them feel better.
I don't want to be burried though. That's too much money for dead body disposal.

 

[smartestnumber5]

I don't want one--but not because of the religious stuff. I'm sure one could be held which has all of the religion taken out just like weddings.

All of the elderly members of my family spend thousands of dollars pre-planning their funerals and buying burial plots and picking out flower arrangements. I object to this on a few levels.

First, I don't want to spend so much of my old age thinking about my own death. Funny story--my grandparents went and picked out spots in a mausoleum. Each "spot" is really a drawer--I guess kind of like at the coroner's office? Well they wanted spots next to one another, but my grandfather wanted one that was about 4 feet in the air. My grandmother doesn't like heights and decided she didn't want to be up that high (yeah, I know she'll be dead and won't know, don't ask me ). My grandfather stubbornly insisted on those spots (like he insists on everything else he wants ). My grandmother ended up going back to the car sobbing to my aunt, "I can't even have what I want for my death. He controlled me my entire life and now he's going to control me for eternity in my death!" I don't want to be 80 years old and have 8% heart function and spend my last few years arguing with my partner about where our bodies should rot!

Second, funerals and burial plots are horribly expensive. I think if there's anything that should be free it should be death. I keep asking friends and family what happens if there is no funeral set up and no burial plot purchased and all that and after the death the no one volunteers to organize a funeral or buy a plot. What does the mourge do with the body? No one ever seems to know and they generally look at me like I'm deranged. But I figure there must be a protocol; I mean, they probably just cremate the body and throw out the ashes. That sounds good enough for me.

 

[vetrik]

DH is an atheist, and the more I think about it, the more I am convinced that I am also. I've tried to think about what I would want if I died, but the answer is that I don't really care - I'll be dead and won't care anyway. Therefore, I've decided I would be happy with whatever my surviving relatives wanted.

The only thing I hope doesn't happen is what happened with my great-aunt's funeral. It sounds awful, but no one really liked her or got along with her, and she hadn't been to church in years. They got this minister for the funeral that never knew her, and there was this "fill in the name" service that was not personalized or fitting to her life at all. I hope there will be people left that love me and plan something that would reflect my life.

 

[Fitswimmer]

A friend of mine was, for lack of a better word, Pagan. Before he died, he moved to a state where he could be buried without a vault, his body was wrapped in linen and he was placed in a simple pine box. He said that he wanted to simply return to the earth. There was a wake, and a ceremony at the grave site-but no prayers. There were some readings from books that he had chosen before he died. It was simple and actually quite beautiful.

 

[bubie2.5]

I don’t want one. I want to go from my death bed directly to the oven (cremation). I don’t care what they do with my ashes, I just want to be cremated “just to be sure I’ll be really death when they dispose of me”.

 

[Disney1fan2002]

My brother did not belive in the Church. I don't think he believed in God, but I am not sure. I know he wanted nothing to do with Church.

When he died, the funeral director asked what Church we wanted the service held in. Dad, grief stricken and numb from shock was thinking the Church he and my mom got married in. I looked at dad, and reminded him that if we put Jimmy's casket in a Church, he would sit up and slap all of us. Dad agreed, and the funeral director offered to get a local Priest to come to the funeral home and say a few prayers. He explained that some people may feel better if that happened. Dad agreed to it.

It was the one of the most unbelievable funerals I ever attended. As a grieving sister, it helped me. The Priest they hired came in, and thought he was doing a generic funeral. Turns out, he realizes the name sounds familiar. Once he found out the nickname we called our brother, he knew. He had taken an ASL course at the local college and my brother was in his class. So, the Priest was actually able to give personal stories about my brother in his Eulogy. Of all my siblings, the fact Jimmy had a Priest who knew him personally speak at his funeral, who would of thought? He was the least religious of my family.

 

[Micca]

A gathering of friends and family perhaps, but no funeral.

 

[WatchinCaptKangaroo]

I want a party with an open bar and good music. There will be no crying, just stories, laughter and joy from my life. I'm dead and I don't care if you're somber. In fact if you are, I will come back and haunt you forever.

 

[crazyforgoofy]

I'm more of an agnostic, I guess. Many religious funerals aren't about the dearly departed so much as a chance for the 'reverend', 'pastor' 'minister', etc. to do a major ad campaign and remind those attending of their "tenuous hold on this mortal coil" as one put it before he shouted about hellfire and brimstone if we died without the right kind of salvation! That distresses me to put it mindly. I don't wish my death to be the cause of others having to sit through that!

I want to be cremated and sprinkled on a garden or compost pile somewhere. The idea of having formaldehyde piped through my stiff, cold body makes me sick and having people stare at me when I can't look back really freaks me out. If my family and friends want to gather and share memories and music (also booze and food I imagine) I think that's great. I wouldn't mind prayers or whatever makes those attending happy but no formal service and NO PREACHING!

 

[robinb]

I want to be cremated and then I want to have a party. No wake and no funeral as I hate both of them. I don't think it's about religion.

 

[crazyme5kids]

My brother is an Athiest, he wants his body donated to medical science. He said he would only want a memorial service.

 

[MushyMushy]

I only have two requests -- no viewing, and I'd like to be cremated. Whatever my loved ones want after that to comfort them, whether it's a religious ceremony or whatever, that's fine with me.

 

[Amity 3]

wanting a funeral is like a bride wanting a $50,000.00 wedding. they're a waste of money and self-serving narcissism.

broil me well-done and scatter the ashes.

 

[GeorgeG]

No funeral for me. Just dispose of me (probably cremation) and get on with life. I have specifically requested no religious service of any kind and no prayers. Get together and have a good time telling lies about me, but I don't want anyone gawking at me unless I can gawk back.

I intend to be a ghost and haunt. I can be a fun ghost or a really nasty ghost, so it would be a good idea to carry out my wishes...

BOO!!!!