Atheist Ceremony

[torsie24]

Hi everyone

Let me start by saying this thread is not about religious choices, or opinions. So please lets not turn it into one!

It is a question I need to ask though!

Jack is an Atheist and is very keen to have our wedding day and ceremony God free.

I was recently talking to another Disney bride who had Rev. Miller (who we're planning on) and that he put God into the wedding ceremony even though he knew they were Atheist.

This would really annoy Jack, and I'd like to avoid this situation.

On the other hand I don't want to tell a man whose life and job is Christianity that we want him for our wedding day but don't want any of his values and beliefs to be present!

Any recomendations for Officiants that are happy to do religion free weddings? I really don't want to offend anyone and it feels a bit of a tender thing to bring up!

 

[Kimberle]

You should hire a Justice of the Peace. They marry w/out religious overtones. They'll also go to your site (generally).

 

[daisygirl902]

I'm using Reverend Jack Day - I expressed to him that I am not interested in having religion incorporated into the ceremony...I wrote the ceremony myself by piecing together 3 non-religious ceremonies that he sent me. So far he's been great to work with. My ceremony is in my PJ if you want ideas!

 

[Boardwalk_bride]

I had Ron Rosenweig and he was so amazing! A lot of non religious ceremonies tend to be cut short, since there are no prayers, etc, but he added so many wonderful words in. Everyone was really impressed with him.

It was also really important to DH not to have someone representing a church in anyway, so using even a rev that would perform a non religious ceremony was out of the question.

HTH

 

[hiwaygal]

Most officiants are willing to do what you ask, but yes, there are some who will "slip" and make references during the actual ceremony (I think I've heard of Rev. Jack and Rev. Tim Herring doing that - to the shock and dismay of the brides).

We used Rev. Kevin (his wife is also an officiant) and while we didn't mind references to God, we did want a more secular service. We told him we wanted him to dress casually (no robes) and we wrote the vows we wanted from the information he sent.

He performed what we wanted perfectly.

 

[ColeV]

I used Rev Kevin Knox. His wife also does ceremonies and she's not a reverend. He had us pick sections from a large selection of readings, intros, etc. We didn't have any religious references, I think there were a few "spiritual" references, but other things could have been picked (neither of us are religious/christian and it worked perfectly for us).

 

[torsie24]

I had Ron Rosenweig and he was so amazing! A lot of non religious ceremonies tend to be cut short, since there are no prayers, etc, but he added so many wonderful words in. Everyone was really impressed with him.

It was also really important to DH not to have someone representing a church in anyway, so using even a rev that would perform a non religious ceremony was out of the question.

HTH

Oooh, he sounds exactly what we're after!

Do you have a video at all?

Thanks everyone for your input. I wouldn't mind somebody slipping and mentioning God, as long as a prayer wasn't thrown in that wasn't planned or anything.

But I think Jack would be a lot mroe comfortable if there was zero chance of any God being mentioned.

 

[Wazzo]

Oooh, he sounds exactly what we're after!

Do you have a video at all?

Thanks everyone for your input. I wouldn't mind somebody slipping and mentioning God, as long as a prayer wasn't thrown in that wasn't planned or anything.

But I think Jack would be a lot mroe comfortable if there was zero chance of any God being mentioned.

Hi!!

We used Ron as well, and I agree that he was amazing. Our ceremony was completely secular, and I thought it was just the right length. Many of our guests commented on how beautiful they thought the ceremony was. Ron memorized all of it, except the part I added in, and he did a great job. I don't have any video, but if you PM me, I'd be happy to email you his "transcript".

 

[Boardwalk_bride]

Oooh, he sounds exactly what we're after!

Do you have a video at all?

Thanks everyone for your input. I wouldn't mind somebody slipping and mentioning God, as long as a prayer wasn't thrown in that wasn't planned or anything.

But I think Jack would be a lot mroe comfortable if there was zero chance of any God being mentioned.

I don't have a video, but like Wazzo, I do have a transcript. He really is so good at what he does! And, IMHO, if you really are not religious, especially your DF, it may be best to have someone there that doesn't represent religion. I guess it all depends on what scale on non-religious people are.

 

[torsie24]

I don't have a video, but like Wazzo, I do have a transcript. He really is so good at what he does! And, IMHO, if you really are not religious, especially your DF, it may be best to have someone there that doesn't represent religion. I guess it all depends on what scale on non-religious people are.

Thank you, that's a good point.

It's not that we're anti religious. My 4 best friends are one Very evangelical Christian, one Hindu, one Buddist and one Catholic. (The beauty if going to school in London!)

But it's more (for me anyway) that I'd feel hypocritical having religion in the ceremony as religion/god/prayer has nothing to do with my everyday life, and won't have anything to do with our marriage. We want our wedding ceremony to be about us and having religious elements in it would just seem odd to those who know us I think.

 

[MsEsty]

We're using Kevin Knox and we're writing the entire ceremony. I think I have the original ceremony in my PJ (we're altered it some since) and we're keeping religion out of it as well (unless video games are our religion, but that is another story)

 

[Ember]

We wrote our own ceremony. I was very upfront that we would be doing this when we were talking to officiants. In the end, we went with Rev. Miller, and while he didn't seem too pleased when he sent me his ceremony, and I sent back mine, he was very good the day of.

We were very specific in what we did and didn't want. Neither of us is religious, so no God. I also have strong feelings about anything related to the "two becoming one" concept, I think that's a silly notion. I also figured this was a very personal day and wanted our ceremony to reflect that, specifically our vows. (Some people don't mind what the vows are as long as they're married, which is perfectly fine. But I consider them to be a promise and I wasn't about to vow something that didn't mean something to me.)

If you'd like to peek at the ceremony we wrote, just let me know. Maybe it will spark some ideas for you guys to write your own.

 

[Bridie1996]

We used Ron as well, and also had a non-religious ceremony. We wrote most of it ourselves and Ron did great- if he was noticably nervous about so much new material.

It takes a little work on your part, but one way to get an idea of each person's style is to check out the STVS's websites sneakpeeks. They don't list the officiant's name, so the work comes in then finding that bride's PJ/TR on here and seeing who they used and checking out the vendor reviews. Most of the disneybrides on there have some sort of TR or review on here.

http://www.stvsvideo.com/sneakpeeks.html

 

[LovesHerTaurus]

He seems to be an absolute sweetheart and one of the civil ceremonies he sent us has absolutely no mention of religion in any way.

I requested information from three officials, and he is the only one who called me personally to chat. I loved the look of him, the information he sent me, his voice (!) and the general feel I got from him!

 

[erin.w]

Do you have contact information for Jack Day? Does he have a website?

 

[LovesHerTaurus]

http://www.revjackday.com/

He wears a suit in some of his pictures as well.

From what I understand he did the first wedding at Disney ever AND is the chaplain for the Orlando Police Department!