Are real smart kids nerds?

[pattyT]

sometimes.

 

[NMAmy]

When I was in high school, I downplayed my good grades. What I really hated was that people would try to copy off me or get me to do their homework for them. People were really surprised when they found out I was in National Honor Society because I would just never talk about my grades.

I think things have changed a bit since way back then. DD is on the honor roll and has mostly AP classes. She's also a jock and plays basketball, volleyball, and runs track. Her friends don't seem to think she's a nerd because of her good grades and she does spend some time tutoring some of her friends, as well. I think it helps that she's really cute (but of course, I'm a bit prejudiced in that regard.)

 

[taximomfor4]

No, DD11, has so many friends that sometimes we don't even answer the phone because they call 10x a day, everyday. And to answer your question....she is a straight "A" student & smart (even skipped a grade...she's in 7th) but in no way a nerd. From what she tells me, she's in the "in" crowd. Is your nephew using this as an excuse? Maybe he just has the "wrong" kind of friends.

Hey! My dd finished 7th grade at 11yo too! She is in 8th now.

Things are touchy for her, she is very careful to NOT let anyone know how old she is because then they assume she is super-smart. She doesn't like to be limited to one facet of herself. And by the way, she IS very very very smart but is NOT a straight A student, and has never been. One of the common fallacies is that high intelligence correlates with grades. Not so. My dd's IQ blows mine away. Really. But I WAS a straight A student (still am, in nursing school so far.) Everyone said I was "so smart." Nope...I was really lucky and am great with test-taking. Basically my talent was predicting what the teacher would want me to know. Back then, at my school, the straight A students were all together all day pretty much (in my classes. The same 28 of us in all the HOnors/AP classes together). It kept us pretty happy, healthy, and gave us a large friend-base. None of us were in the MAJOR in-crowd, but very few of us were "the nerds." Only 2 come to mind actually. The rest of us were friendly with, not necessarily true parts of, the CLIQUE.

About being labelled a "Nerd" ... it doesn't seem to be a label for the "brown-nosing book-toting pack" anymore. Around here, the "nerds" are the kids who are perceived as "gross, stinky, dirty, greasy, pizza-faced, awkward, annoying." This came from my dd12 (the 8th grader) who gets afraid sometimes that her being nice to the nerds will get her clumped in with them. Doesn't help that she plays viola in the school's orchestra. The orchestra kids already have a "strike" against them in the coolness factor.

My hope is that she will be confident enough in who she is, etc. that she will get through the awful labelling years with self esteem more or less intact and healthy. So far so good.

 

[NeverlandClub23]

When I was in high school (5 years ago...it's been that long? Geez, time flies.) the most popular kids in my school were straight A students. But they were also very much into school sports, clubs, etc. I think if a smart kid participates in school activities he/she has a better chance at not being grouped in as a "nerd". But I was grouped in with the "nerds and dorks" and I think I turned out just fine. Of course except for my obsession with WDW.

Also, it depends on what sports/clubs your kid is a part of. Like band was never considered "cool", but yearbook staff, football, soccer, baseball, etc. were. I think it's way too complicated to try and figure out how to be popular so I was just myself and accepted I was a "nerd".

 

[Maleficent13]

I think it helps that she's really cute (but of course, I'm a bit prejudiced in that regard.)

Nope, you're not prejudiced. She's gorgeous.

Back then, at my school, the straight A students were all together all day pretty much (in my classes. The same 28 of us in all the HOnors/AP classes together). It kept us pretty happy, healthy, and gave us a large friend-base. None of us were in the MAJOR in-crowd, but very few of us were "the nerds." Only 2 come to mind actually. The rest of us were friendly with, not necessarily true parts of, the CLIQUE.

This pretty accurately describes my experience as well.

 

[ahutton]

In High School I was in the Speech Team/Drama crowd. Others may have thought we were nerds, but we were too cool to care what they thought! Reality was (and is), if you are in any circle of friends, and they are good people (they don't tear you down), the rest doesn't matter because you've found a way to fit in.

I know, and can say that, because in 7th grade the group of girls who were my "friends" came to me one day and said they didn't want me to hang around with them anymore because they didn't like me. Ironically, that is when I learned who my real friends were and the rest of that year went MUCH better. I learned some great life lessons in those horrible hours.

 

[binny]

nope, my GATE program son is involved in Hockey and football and basketball ( different seasons of course) I think being a nerd is a state of mind.