Appropriate Book for a 3 yr old? "I Dissent - Ruth Bader Ginsberg, makes her mark"

[cabanafrau]

I don't recall saying it's either/or. I simply said I'm skeptical of the scenario outlined and feel it's nothing more than an attempt to boast and be entirely too precious for a social media audience. I didn't express any disapproval of the subject matter of the book.

My children are grown. I don't need to regale anybody with what I did with them back in the day to encourage reading. Judging by where they are in their lives things worked out well, with both marching down very different paths despite being parented by the same two parents. IMO initially you get kids engaged by following where they gravitate and attempt to get them face to face with a good variety, hopefully sparking more and more curiosity and skewing towards increasingly better literature and/or subject matter.

I found the trophy style mommying annoying enough at school events or library story hours and such. I'm really glad I didn't have to put up with the social media broadcast of it as well. Based on my experience if OP could save this person's facebook post and look at it again when the kid is ready to graduate high school there might be quite an amusing contrast.

 

[Magpie]

I don't recall saying it's either/or. I simply said I'm skeptical of the scenario outlined and feel it's nothing more than an attempt to boast and be entirely too precious for a social media audience. I didn't express any disapproval of the subject matter of the book.

My children are grown. I don't need to regale anybody with what I did with them back in the day to encourage reading. Judging by where they are in their lives things worked out well, with both marching down very different paths despite being parented by the same two parents. IMO initially you get kids engaged by following where they gravitate and attempt to get them face to face with a good variety, hopefully sparking more and more curiosity and skewing towards increasingly better literature and/or subject matter.

I found the trophy style mommying annoying enough at school events or library story hours and such. I'm really glad I didn't have to put up with the social media broadcast of it as well. Based on my experience if OP could save this person's facebook post and look at it again when the kid is ready to graduate high school there might be quite an amusing contrast.

My children are grown, too. And nothing we read together when they were toddlers would be in any way an "amusing contrast" to where they are now (except maybe Moo, Baa, La, La, La - that one's an amusing contrast to everything ). My son has moved out and is entering his third year of Economics at university. He's been composing a lot of music, lately. My daughter is living at home, studying biochemistry at university and working full time in the bio lab, doing research she's designed herself. If anything, it's fascinating to see how some of the things that interested them most as preschoolers have carried forward into adulthood.

So I don't see, "I love this book! It's the best book ever! My three year old loves it!" as "precious" or "trophy style mommying" or any other such negative thing. I see it as being enthusiastic about a book, and wanting other people to enjoy it, too.

But then again, I don't recall ever being annoyed (or even noticing) "trophy style mommying" at library story hour. I often noticed what other parents were doing differently and sometimes I'd try to emulate them. Can I get the kids more active? Can I get them involved in sports, like those folks do? Oh, they're spending the afternoon cooking together, what a great idea! We should try that!

In general, I liked talking to other parents and enjoyed seeing what they were doing. I never, myself, ever tried to make anyone else feel about their parenting.

 

[amberpi]

My 2 and half year old nephew has it...but my dad was a newspaper guy, my mom is a reading teacher, I'm a reader and so is my nephew's mother. That child has a LOT of books. The one he brings us the most to read him is a Pooh book - which is also a command - "POOH!" He liked listening to this book.

 

[Skippy918]

We have this book which I have read to DD6. It's not a difficult read and I was able to answer her questions about it. I learned some facts from the book too. I highly recommend it.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

Reminds me of the episode of MASH where Col Potter was reading a "bedtime story" to a Korean child. He was reading the manual for the M1 Garand Rifle LOL

 

[cabanafrau]

My children are grown, too. And nothing we read together when they were toddlers would be in any way an "amusing contrast" to where they are now (except maybe Moo, Baa, La, La, La - that one's an amusing contrast to everything ). My son has moved out and is entering his third year of Economics at university. He's been composing a lot of music, lately. My daughter is living at home, studying biochemistry at university and working full time in the bio lab, doing research she's designed herself. If anything, it's fascinating to see how some of the things that interested them most as preschoolers have carried forward into adulthood.

So I don't see, "I love this book! It's the best book ever! My three year old loves it!" as "precious" or "trophy style mommying" or any other such negative thing. I see it as being enthusiastic about a book, and wanting other people to enjoy it, too.

But then again, I don't recall ever being annoyed (or even noticing) "trophy style mommying" at library story hour. I often noticed what other parents were doing differently and sometimes I'd try to emulate them. Can I get the kids more active? Can I get them involved in sports, like those folks do? Oh, they're spending the afternoon cooking together, what a great idea! We should try that!

In general, I liked talking to other parents and enjoyed seeing what they were doing. I never, myself, ever tried to make anyone else feel about their parenting.

I guess I was far too sensitive back in the day then. I just didn't see the need to make sure every parent within earshot knew what my precious moppets were reading, or feel the need to inquire of other parents at school which reading group their kids were in -- or inform them where my kid went everyday during reading time. Maybe I was getting some of the comments and questions I did because they heard talk about where she was going every day. Maybe I'm still too sensitive because I still don't think it was their business and I know how uncomfortable it made my daughter to realize she was being talked about, not just by the kids, but by their parents too.

Back when I was a stay home mom I helped in the school library and worked the book fairs. I enjoyed when the kids were sincerely enthusiastic about a book, because it was precisely that, enthusiasm without artifice. I'd have the parent trying to tell me their kid was only interested in books on anatomy or astrophysics and the previous month the kid had spent most of their 20-minutes at the book fair giving me chapter and verse of Captain Underpants when I admitted I hadn't read that and my kids didn't have any of those. I'm wary of parents who seem so desperate to inform everyone about their kids' aptitudes, real or perceived -- especially when the information is related in a way to convince you it's all because of super special parenting. (I have no problem with the kid thinking I was a total loser of a parent because my kids missed out on Captain Underpants. He might be right.)

A lot of the time I think parenting is just trying to hang on for dear life and keep up with whatever direction the kid you got is headed, hoping you got the muscle to pump the brakes if they take a wrong turn somewhere. The next thing you know those little kids you were trying to get over the hump of reading are graduating. Some are headed off to college or university -- and then the not so subtle competition of which school they are applying, got accepted or are heading to ensues. One of my daughters would have missed the opportunity of a lifetime if she had attended virtually anywhere else in the world instead of where she decided to head for undergrad -- a choice that had an awful lot of people saying, she's going WHERE? But that pales in comparison to her younger sister's choice to begin at community college before transferring to university. That really sets tongues wagging.

 

[penn19]

I guess I was far too sensitive back in the day then. I just didn't see the need to make sure every parent within earshot knew what my precious moppets were reading, or feel the need to inquire of other parents at school which reading group their kids were in -- or inform them where my kid went everyday during reading time. Maybe I was getting some of the comments and questions I did because they heard talk about where she was going every day. Maybe I'm still too sensitive because I still don't think it was their business and I know how uncomfortable it made my daughter to realize she was being talked about, not just by the kids, but by their parents too.

Back when I was a stay home mom I helped in the school library and worked the book fairs. I enjoyed when the kids were sincerely enthusiastic about a book, because it was precisely that, enthusiasm without artifice. I'd have the parent trying to tell me their kid was only interested in books on anatomy or astrophysics and the previous month the kid had spent most of their 20-minutes at the book fair giving me chapter and verse of Captain Underpants when I admitted I hadn't read that and my kids didn't have any of those. I'm wary of parents who seem so desperate to inform everyone about their kids' aptitudes, real or perceived -- especially when the information is related in a way to convince you it's all because of super special parenting. (I have no problem with the kid thinking I was a total loser of a parent because my kids missed out on Captain Underpants. He might be right.)

A lot of the time I think parenting is just trying to hang on for dear life and keep up with whatever direction the kid you got is headed, hoping you got the muscle to pump the brakes if they take a wrong turn somewhere. The next thing you know those little kids you were trying to get over the hump of reading are graduating. Some are headed off to college or university -- and then the not so subtle competition of which school they are applying, got accepted or are heading to ensues. One of my daughters would have missed the opportunity of a lifetime if she had attended virtually anywhere else in the world instead of where she decided to head for undergrad -- a choice that had an awful lot of people saying, she's going WHERE? But that pales in comparison to her younger sister's choice to begin at community college before transferring to university. That really sets tongues wagging.

Yes. Yes. And yes! Competitive Parenting should be an Olympic sport

 

[Magpie]

I guess I was far too sensitive back in the day then. I just didn't see the need to make sure every parent within earshot knew what my precious moppets were reading, or feel the need to inquire of other parents at school which reading group their kids were in -- or inform them where my kid went everyday during reading time. Maybe I was getting some of the comments and questions I did because they heard talk about where she was going every day. Maybe I'm still too sensitive because I still don't think it was their business and I know how uncomfortable it made my daughter to realize she was being talked about, not just by the kids, but by their parents too.

Back when I was a stay home mom I helped in the school library and worked the book fairs. I enjoyed when the kids were sincerely enthusiastic about a book, because it was precisely that, enthusiasm without artifice. I'd have the parent trying to tell me their kid was only interested in books on anatomy or astrophysics and the previous month the kid had spent most of their 20-minutes at the book fair giving me chapter and verse of Captain Underpants when I admitted I hadn't read that and my kids didn't have any of those. I'm wary of parents who seem so desperate to inform everyone about their kids' aptitudes, real or perceived -- especially when the information is related in a way to convince you it's all because of super special parenting. (I have no problem with the kid thinking I was a total loser of a parent because my kids missed out on Captain Underpants. He might be right.)

A lot of the time I think parenting is just trying to hang on for dear life and keep up with whatever direction the kid you got is headed, hoping you got the muscle to pump the brakes if they take a wrong turn somewhere. The next thing you know those little kids you were trying to get over the hump of reading are graduating. Some are headed off to college or university -- and then the not so subtle competition of which school they are applying, got accepted or are heading to ensues. One of my daughters would have missed the opportunity of a lifetime if she had attended virtually anywhere else in the world instead of where she decided to head for undergrad -- a choice that had an awful lot of people saying, she's going WHERE? But that pales in comparison to her younger sister's choice to begin at community college before transferring to university. That really sets tongues wagging.

Well, I doubt you would have liked me, then. Because I loved talking to other parents, and I especially loved talking about our kids. I still do - if I mention my daughter in a post like this, I usually read it to her. It's never made her uncomfortable, as far as I know. And at 22, I expect she'd have told me by now. (She does sometimes make me edit, if she thinks I'm being inaccurate.)

I'm a sociable kind of person, I guess. And pretty secure. I love hearing about your kids aptitudes! (To be fair, I'm an academic tutor, so.... ) And I'm definitely interested in what your precious moppets are reading because my kids might like reading it, too. Captain Underpants (which I have in my personal library) and books on Astrophysics (which I also have) are equally interesting to me. I'd probably recommend "The Thing Explainer" which should appeal to both those who love Captain Underpants and those who love Physics.

For me, parenting was an 18 year long creative project ("Build a Human!") and a heck of a lot of a lot of fun. I really enjoyed seeing how the kids grew, and I loved helping them get there. I never felt like I was in competition with anyone. I had one kid who was ridiculously precocious and another who has a learning disability. One of them was born with a facial deformity, the other had issues with his digestion. They each presented very unique challenges, and by talking to as wide a variety of other parents about their kids, I got so many more ideas of what to do with mine.

Maybe the people I dealt with were nicer. I know I avoided some people, because I felt we had nothing in common. And I know some people avoided me, because they felt the same way.

I never cared about specifics like choice of career or university versus college versus working in the community. What I care about is that my completed Human Beings are self-sustaining, healthy, happy (or at least in a position to pursue their own happiness), capable and independent.

I'm pretty darn proud of mine, for all sorts of reasons.

 

[rastahomie]

I see no harm in exposing a child to politics at that age.

If I may get up on my soapbox and preach for a moment: People say "I hate politics" or "I don't pay attention to politics" or whatever. Well I'm sorry, politics affect you in your daily life, whether you want to believe it or not. Want to go to a casino and blow a few bucks but can't because gambling is illegal in your state? Politics. Want to be able to purchase hormonal birth control? Better start paying attention to politics. And yes, politics affects children too, and it's important to introduce them to something that will affect their day-to-day life.

 

[gotomu212]

My preschooler used to pick storybook biographies out at 3. I don't get the "political" angle. We read about all the founding fathers and more significant presidents. I wouldn't consider a kids biography book on Abe Lincoln or George Washington to be political. It was here's how they grew up, here's what they did in adulthood, and oh yeah they were also president.

The same with this book. It's the story of her life, as told to kids. I can't imagine a 3 year old hears this, turns on MSNBC, and starts trashing conservative values. OP you are overthinking this.

 

[cabanafrau]

Well, I doubt you would have liked me, then. Because I loved talking to other parents, and I especially loved talking about our kids. I still do - if I mention my daughter in a post like this, I usually read it to her. It's never made her uncomfortable, as far as I know. And at 22, I expect she'd have told me by now. (She does sometimes make me edit, if she thinks I'm being inaccurate.)

I'm a sociable kind of person, I guess. And pretty secure. I love hearing about your kids aptitudes! (To be fair, I'm an academic tutor, so.... ) And I'm definitely interested in what your precious moppets are reading because my kids might like reading it, too. Captain Underpants (which I have in my personal library) and books on Astrophysics (which I also have) are equally interesting to me. I'd probably recommend "The Thing Explainer" which should appeal to both those who love Captain Underpants and those who love Physics.

For me, parenting was an 18 year long creative project ("Build a Human!") and a heck of a lot of a lot of fun. I really enjoyed seeing how the kids grew, and I loved helping them get there. I never felt like I was in competition with anyone. I had one kid who was ridiculously precocious and another who has a learning disability. One of them was born with a facial deformity, the other had issues with his digestion. They each presented very unique challenges, and by talking to as wide a variety of other parents about their kids, I got so many more ideas of what to do with mine.

Maybe the people I dealt with were nicer. I know I avoided some people, because I felt we had nothing in common. And I know some people avoided me, because they felt the same way.

I never cared about specifics like choice of career or university versus college versus working in the community. What I care about is that my completed Human Beings are self-sustaining, healthy, happy (or at least in a position to pursue their own happiness), capable and independent.

I'm pretty darn proud of mine, for all sorts of reasons.

Why the need to sprinkle in book recommendations in your response? Did it seem as if I were in particular need? That just struck me as odd.

Note, I didn't go into detail about my own children because I just don't care to on an open forum. Nor did I say I didn't enjoy parenting them, am not proud of them, that the feelings of competitive parenting were emanating from me, or that I did not play nicely with other parents -- but it's curious you subtly shaded as if I did.

I stand by my belief that the situation OP outlined points to a parent looking to gather an audience so she may take her bow publicly. I had no use for those types of parents when my kids were small, nor do I today. I'm very familiar with how it works when other parents want to chit chat about stuff they or their kids really think is neat or particularly enjoyed. That's a horse of an entirely different breed, and the parents I would gravitate to socialize with.

 

[Magpie]

Why the need to sprinkle in book recommendations in your response? Did it seem as if I were in particular need? That just struck me as odd.

Note, I didn't go into detail about my own children because I just don't care to on an open forum. Nor did I say I didn't enjoy parenting them, am not proud of them, that the feelings of competitive parenting were emanating from me, or that I did not play nicely with other parents -- but it's curious you subtly shaded as if I did.

I stand by my belief that the situation OP outlined points to a parent looking to gather an audience so she may take her bow publicly. I had no use for those types of parents when my kids were small, nor do I today. I'm very familiar with how it works when other parents want to chit chat about stuff they or their kids really think is neat or particularly enjoyed. That's a horse of an entirely different breed, and the parents I would gravitate to socialize with.

Did you find the fact that I mentioned a book by name somehow offensive?

I wasn't recommending the book to YOU, I was simply giving an example of a book that both the child and parent you mentioned might enjoy.

And I wasn't certainly trying to imply anything negative about your personality or your parenting, so my apologies if you read it that way. Believe me, I am not a subtle person, so if you read anything subtle into what I wrote, you can rest assured I didn't put it there consciously.

However, the fact that you read this into my post does clearly illustrate why you interpreted the OP's post the way you did, and why I interpreted it completely differently. It's possible you're right and she's a grandstanding narcissist. Me, I'm happy to be oblivious to that and assume good intentions on the part of this person I've never met.

Because, what it comes down to is I see absolutely nothing offensive about saying, "We just got this book, and we've read it together multiple times, and we love it!" It doesn't matter - to me! - if it's a bio about a judge or a book about princesses. But, I do understand why you might feel differently.

Here's a question for you, though... suppose the book had been a different one? Suppose it WAS "Moo, Baa, La, La, La" by Sandra Boynton. Would youstill have felt that that the parent was looking to gather an audience to take her bow publicly? Would you have considered her "that kind of parent"? Is the problem here really in her choice of book to love? Or do you feel that even mentioning that you are enjoying books with your child is in of itself a form of bragging and a violation of your child's privacy?

 

[Magpie]

Why the need to sprinkle in book recommendations in your response? Did it seem as if I were in particular need? That just struck me as odd.

Hang on, did you think "Build a Human" was also a book title? It was just a mild joke about how I approached raising kids. Not a manual. Probably shouldn't have put it in quotes, my apologies!

(Just trying to figure out how you felt "sprinkled" on by me naming one book as an example of something I'd suggest to a parent who isn't you.)

 

[amberpi]

Hang on, did you think "Build a Human" was also a book title? It was just a mild joke about how I approached raising kids. Not a manual. Probably shouldn't have put it in quotes, my apologies!

OT: If "Build a Human" exists, I'd surely love to read it when I consider dating.

 

[BLAZEY]

Because, what it comes down to is I see absolutely nothing offensive about saying, "We just got this book, and we've read it together multiple times, and we love it!" It doesn't matter - to me! - if it's a bio about a judge or a book about princesses. But, I do understand why you might feel differently.

I agree 100%, nothing wrong with encouraging a child's love for reading. At 3 the child could love the pictures and maybe think her name is neat, or maybe mommy has told her is about the childhood of a really important lady. As she gets older and read the book repeatedly she will understand more of it. For the record "Moo, Baa, La, La, La, was as favourite in our house too, as is "The Paperbag Princess" My daughter is old enough to read now and reads me stories before bed!

 

[cabanafrau]

Hang on, did you think "Build a Human" was also a book title? It was just a mild joke about how I approached raising kids. Not a manual. Probably shouldn't have put it in quotes, my apologies!

(Just trying to figure out how you felt "sprinkled" on by me naming one book as an example of something I'd suggest to a parent who isn't you.)

No, but I guess that explains your gauge of my intelligence.

 

[Magpie]

No, but I guess that explains your gauge of my intelligence.

All I can offer is my sincerest apologies for giving you that impression.

 

[cabanafrau]

Did you find the fact that I mentioned a book by name somehow offensive?

I wasn't recommending the book to YOU, I was simply giving an example of a book that both the child and parent you mentioned might enjoy.

And I wasn't certainly trying to imply anything negative about your personality or your parenting, so my apologies if you read it that way. Believe me, I am not a subtle person, so if you read anything subtle into what I wrote, you can rest assured I didn't put it there consciously.

However, the fact that you read this into my post does clearly illustrate why you interpreted the OP's post the way you did, and why I interpreted it completely differently. It's possible you're right and she's a grandstanding narcissist. Me, I'm happy to be oblivious to that and assume good intentions on the part of this person I've never met.

Because, what it comes down to is I see absolutely nothing offensive about saying, "We just got this book, and we've read it together multiple times, and we love it!" It doesn't matter - to me! - if it's a bio about a judge or a book about princesses. But, I do understand why you might feel differently.

Here's a question for you, though... suppose the book had been a different one? Suppose it WAS "Moo, Baa, La, La, La" by Sandra Boynton. Would youstill have felt that that the parent was looking to gather an audience to take her bow publicly? Would you have considered her "that kind of parent"? Is the problem here really in her choice of book to love? Or do you feel that even mentioning that you are enjoying books with your child is in of itself a form of bragging and a violation of your child's privacy?

Still do not understand why my mention of a past situation required an example of an appropriate book in response? Rest easy, the child in question is now an adult in his early twenties. I'm pretty sure the crisis has passed.

As far as your assessment of my reaction to discussion of various books, I think I summed it all up above when I mentioned I have an appreciation for enthusiasm without artifice. You're free to critique why it is I feel that way when you don't. You could make it simple and just chalk it up to my character flaws.

 

[cabanafrau]

All I can offer is my sincerest apologies for giving you that impression.

Don't sweat it. I can assure you I'm not.

 

[DaisyJ]

Yes. Yes. And yes! Competitive Parenting should be an Olympic sport

It is on the Dis.