Anyone w/hard time deciding on 3rd child- w/Disney as a factor?

[goofy53073]

I am in a similar situation only deciding whether to go for baby #4. There are many things factoring into the decision but yes, Disney and other travel are definitely a consideration We have a son who just turned 8 and two girls who are 6 and 3. I have actually been making myself NUTS trying to decide what to do. I always thought I wanted just 3 kids but I can not shake the longing for another baby Many of my friends when they hear about someone who is pregnant are like Thank goodness that is not me. I on the other hand get a pang everytime I hear of someone who is expecting.

 

[Mousemommy1]

This discussion is bringing alot of insight. If I'm being honest...would I like another one? Yes. Would I like to take a shot at giving DH a son? Absolutely. DH says he is absolutely fine with two girls and basically says he's happy to spoil them like the little princesses they are!!!

Can we afford another? Yes. But, as I said before, we both work. I don't think that I am SAHM material...I mean, I love my kids to death, but certainly need my me time. My working basically pays for our vacations, so I would need to continue to work, but now paying for 3 kids childcare. (Oldest DD is in 1st grade, but we pay for afterschool care AND right now she is in the public school, but we may have to make the switch to private - $$$$)

So many "real-life" considerations, but just funny that my DH always brings up the "we won't be able to go to Disney as much" card...

I still think we'll stick with 2 - and I respect everyone's decision in how many they decide to have, for whatever reasons!!! If we have a surprise someday, we'll then...we'll welcome him/her to the club w/open arms!!

 

[mrsr2ro]

Love this thread! We have four -- 6/4/2/8mo. (I get a lot of - are you nuts?!?!)

I guess the whole hotel part never factored in -- I didn't really think much about it. I come from a large family myself and we stayed in FW cabins when we went as kids (had to rent two side by side - I remember them telling my mom they couldn't guarantee that, and she told them, ok - but there will be 5 teenagers in one - do you really one them far away from the one with the parents? And of course they were side by side )

I do have to say that when deciding on #4 that I DID consider the "ride" thing -- that if we had 3 kids one person would end up sitting alone. NOW of course this was not the deciding factor -- but it did come to my head and I recall telling my DH and him laughing at me.

For those of you considering - I can tell from experience this:

If we would have stopped at our 2 DS our life would be a lot easier.

If we stopped at two we probably would have still been happy.

But adding our 2 DD's has brought IMMENSE joy to our lives. We are still "in the thick of it" and yes my days are long and I don't get a lot of time to pamper myself. But I know that before long, they will grow up. Time passing is inevitable. I have no regrets. It was the best decision we have made. I also am one who loves being pregnant, loves caring for a newborn, and just in general loves motherhood. I have many friends who frankly do not and are quite happy to stop at 1 or 2.

When we had #3, I told my DH we had to have #4 right away and he agreed. (they are 18mo apart). That way we get through the diapers/naps/etc all at once, and we'd be past that stage faster -- not that I don't LOVE this stage in many ways, but it does make things like travel more difficult. Heck going to Costco turns into a 2 hour ordeal! But to me, we did it perfectly. To others - we are NUTS!

I had always wanted four - and I can tell you that now that I've had four I know I'm done. I have no pangs/hopes/wonders about having anymore. I am DONE. I put all of my maternity clothes in a bag and donated them a month after DD was born. I could not say that after each of the others -- with them, I knew deep down I wasn't done. So sometimes, you just have to trust your gut.

Who knows though -- talk me during the teen years and maybe I'll have a different opinion

 

[Mousemommy1]

2 boys - 2 girls - I'd say that's pretty perfect!!!

I would not mind having twin boys, if I were to get pregnant again!!!

 

[mrsr2ro]

This conversation has me laughing in a good way.

We went to Disney several times with just one, then two kids. Then we hit the parks for a week with 3 kids (7, 5 and 3) at the time. The only thing I would do differently with those ages is never do a buffet. Once you are out numbered, it is just way too much work with the plating factor.

Now we have 5 boys. But my older 3 are now very self sufficient at 12, 10 and 8 and the 4 yr old is very self sufficient to. As for going to disney and he amount of kids, well we plan to go hopefully this summer.

Once you hit 3 kids, it really makes no difference the amount you have because you will forever be outnumbered, not enough hands etc.

LOL - I can't agree more about the buffets!!!

And yes - I tell people all the time, once we mastered 3, adding a 4th is really not a big deal.

 

[mrsr2ro]

2 boys - 2 girls - I'd say that's pretty perfect!!!

I would not mind having twin boys, if I were to get pregnant again!!!

Yes - my DH are not the super religious type be we do sincerely thank GOD all the time and tell everyone that we are blessed. My DH had a very difficult/horrible childhood and he believes this is God's way of making it up to him.

 

[Mousemommy1]

Having a happy family is the BIGGEST blessing (coming from a not overly religious person). DH and I know how lucky we are to have the family we've got, and also know that if we were to be surprised with another, then it was meant to be and would absolutely just be another blessing.

 

[Iwant2BAprincess]

for me it ended up being a head vs heart decision. I am a very logic oriented person-I don't do well with the phrase "it will all work itself out" not near enough controll for me. So when our youngest was about 6mos old I told DH to set himself up an appt and until that time it was hands off. At that time I knew I was not making an emotional one (like I would have these last 2 or 3 years) but rather a logical one. I knew this is the best overall for my family so I commited to it then. Do I still wish we could have had one more, yes. Do I know we still made the right choice, yes.

 

[Sheepdog23]

What a funny thing to read this thread when I actually just thought today when I started to feel pregnancy symptoms, crap, we have vwl as our home resort so we have to go up to a 2br if we have another kid and that means more points to buy... I look back on that thought and now I cannot not stop laughing because I cannot believe the first thing I thought about was my DVC point status and not where are we going to put the baby in our tiny house or how with the my two kids react to a little brother or sister? I can say that I grew up as one of three going to disney and we stayed at FW, tent camping and never thought it was boring. Now I am one of 5 and we still make disney possible. Thanks for making me laugh. now i only hope the test is positive...

 

[MamaJessie]

Disney never had a hand in how many I have, but I have tried to plan when we have a baby so as not to be preggo at disney... now who knows if that won't change in the future but that's how it has been so far...

 

[Belle5]

2 boys - 2 girls - I'd say that's pretty perfect!!!

I would not mind having twin boys, if I were to get pregnant again!!!

Speaking as someone who has six sons, let me caution you to NEVER decide to have a baby with a son in mind. I refused to have #6 until DH stopped talking about having a little girl! I said, "Until you are at the point of wanting a baby--any baby--don't talk to me." I waited until that day came--and then it took me a couple of years to decide I was "there". Good thing...since we, once again, did not get pink! FYI, I would not trade my DS7 for all the money, trips or girls in the whole universe! He is our treasure! (And a precious gift to all of his older brothers who think the sun rises and sets on him)

Belle5
mom to DS24, DS22, DS20, DS18, DS13 and DS7

 

[5 for WDW]

Our Disney trips were not a factor for whether or not we had a third. However, it did convince us to join DVC!

Our kids are 13, 11 and 7. Two boys and a girl. Once she turned 3, we knew our accommodation choices in WDW were going to be limited. So, DVC was a no brainer. We still stay at POR as well. Our last trip as well as our upcoming August trip will be there. Banking our points for a big trip next Xmas.

 

[kjs1976]

We have one DD who is 3 and proudly tells people she has been to WDW 3 times! Probably going for a 4th this Aug. I did promise her I would take her to WDW if she would just come out on one more push....big head....and she did, so we had to make good on that when she was 8 mos. We love sharing WDW with her and love that we can afford it. his next trip will be the first one we have to pay for her park tickets and sit-down meals.

The real factor? Will she ever sleep though the night for more than a few months at a time?! If we could get that to be consistent, I would gladly have another. But for now, we love our Disney princess and will keep taking her as long as great codes/deals keep coming out!

 

[FlightlessDuck]

My wife and I were planning on adopting a 3rd child after having given birth to two. During our trip to Disney in 2009 with our two older kids plus three other younger kids, I decided I was done having kids.

Watching the 2 year old and 5 year old run off to the bathroom 5 times a day, seeing how hard it was to get them out the door on time, etc., were all factors for me. But it wasn't just Disney. With another kid, we couldn't run out the grocery store or the movies by ourselves (our others are now 14 and 10). Travel wasn't the question, since we drive. It was just the pure stress of having a little kid during this time of my life.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Never..we WERE Florida residents and that helped A LOT.


We now have our four kids we wanted and that DVC that took us 11 years to buy. Now that we are no longer Florida residents (not our first choice, cue the violins!)--my DVC guarantees us a trip to the mouse. I just have to swallow the fact that thus tickets may have to be purchased *without* that FL Driver's license. That hurts more than the concept that our family of 6 doesn't squeeze into anything less than a DVC 2 BR once little one turns 3.

At least we are still eligible for the AP discount on a full annual pass.

 

[OhdahLolly]

Not with Disney as a factor. I am also not going to say that it didn't cross my mind in my planning mania... or that I am not trying to work out the logistics now

My DH is really pushing for number 3. We had originally talked about having a halloween baby last year, and if I conceived this month, that would be my exact due date. However.. there is a lot to consider. I am looking to get back to work/school as much as possible. We'd have to trade in our car (love our pruis, but it won't fit 3 kids!), my goal this year is to train for at least a half marathon, and we are finally looking at a break soon!

My DS will be in kinder garden this fall, and my DD will be in pre-school. We don't have a lot of help from my family as far as watching the kids (read: only in cases of medical emergency), and my IL's have went bat crazy.

But yes, I do wonder now how I'd manage a trip where the kids out number the adults.. even though lots of disparents do it every year!

 

[fairestoneofall]

we were not planning to have a third, so i hadn't even been considering how it would affect our plans. however, God saw fit to give us a third. we'll have a huge age gap between the other two and the baby (due in June). but we are excited nonetheless.

i was supposed to be running the half marathon tomorrow (well, technically today). but those plans were changed. i was so sick during the first trimester, that i couldn't imagine getting out and walking, let alone training for a half marathon!

so, our plans changed. now, we're going to go in december for DD's 10th birthday. the baby will be six months old. i know it's going to slow me down a lot, but that's fine. the older two and DH will have a fabulous time. i know i will too, but i'm realistic that i'll be more busy with other things.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

we were not planning to have a third, so i hadn't even been considering how it would affect our plans. however, God saw fit to give us a third. we'll have a huge age gap between the other two and the baby (due in June). but we are excited nonetheless.

i was supposed to be running the half marathon tomorrow (well, technically today). but those plans were changed. i was so sick during the first trimester, that i couldn't imagine getting out and walking, let alone training for a half marathon!

so, our plans changed. now, we're going to go in december for DD's 10th birthday. the baby will be six months old. i know it's going to slow me down a lot, but that's fine. the older two and DH will have a fabulous time. i know i will too, but i'm realistic that i'll be more busy with other things.

Awww--congratulations.

I had planned my son--but also to do the Disneyland half--I held out but then cancelled the month before.

There will be other races! (though boo--it was the inaugural for me...oh well.)

 

[lady_bug_888]

I know for sure that I want another child. Biologically it will be my second however I have a step-son that is also MY child so this will be our third child. There is a 6 year age gap between my DS and my DD however it works REALLY well and DS is a great big brother.

We we going to start trying again next fall but then talked about a Disney trip in April 2012 so we were going to delay a bit (so I guess Disney was a factor LOL). We decided to go to Disney this August instead so we're on track for the baby. It will of course mean that we don't do Disney again until at least 2014 however we will still camp or travel somewhere small when I'm pregnant and when the baby is young.

I think our hard choice will come when we decide if we are going to have a 4th child. My DH and I both come from families of 4 so it's what we're used to and it wouldn't be that much of a stretch overall. However there are things to consider: timing, kids age gaps, vacations, schooling etc... DH doesn't want to parent forever and I can relate to that (although lately he is the one bringing up a 4th!). I told him let's just think forward to #3 and go from there!

 

[Jazcat]

This is so funny we have had this talk. We adopted twins and really did leave it in God's hands but we say our lifestyle would really change with another one. Less traveling harder to just go places cause of carseats. So we would have loved a biological child God blessed us a different way. We just got back from our first family Disney trip it was so neat to see the kids reaction to the characters they ran into the arms are characters.