yup-that's why i'm on the boards right now (and often my posts are in the middle of the night).
with me a large part of it is psychological. i've had 2 strokes. one happened when i was awake so i was able to seek help, the other happened when i was asleep and i ended up feeling afraid to sleep for fear it would happen again. i had counseling that helped deal with it to some extent, but times like now when i've had an insanely stressful day (stress contributed to both strokes occuring) it's not something i can rationalize myself out of-my body just won't let me sleep.
i took soma years ago, but like you it did me little good (just kind of made me drowsy). ambien works o.k. but i dont feel particularly rested.
one thing that helps me is to dvr boring shows with lots of narration (think old reruns of american justice, stuff on the history channel, court t.v.)-if i lay on the couch and try to watch them i tend to get drowsy, so i leave it on turn over and just listen. it can help me drift off.
what's the deal with your insurance company? did they remove ambian cr from their covered list? is there any provision where your doctor can make an appeal to them to cover it though it's not listed? (my son's med is not listed on the covered script list for my insurance but the doctor was able to get the insurance company to cover it because he documented it was the only effective med of that type that worked for ds-and it's one that costs a couple hundred a month over the counter).