Another question for married folks..

[sha_lyn]

Nope, sex with current spouse isn't infrequent, would be a good sex life. The other spouse just wants variety, wants to stay with current spouse, cause they love that spouse.

Yep... sounds exactly like the couple I was talking about.

 

[MAKmom]

Based on the other thread and the responses I am curious. One of the posters said that if her DH came to her before he wandered and said he was interested, she would let him see if the grass was greener. Based on that, and on the Oprah sex show that had a segment on Open Marriages,
what would you do, if your spouse came to you, and said:

I love you but I want an open marriage. I may only do it once a year, but I want to be able to go out and have sex with someone else. You can have sex with someone else too. Not a long term affair, just casual sex.

WWYD??

What is the other thead?

 

[poohandwendy]

Nope. No way, no how. If you want to be married, then be married. If you want to be single, then be single.

MTE

I wouldn't agree to it, nor would my DH.

 

[Jpgirl]

I'd say to my dh, "Sure you can have an open marriage-right after you sign the divorce papers,give me half of everything and sign the alimony checks every month."

 

[Camicar]

but what if you're only getting the lasagna once in a great while, like say major holidays only. Wasn't the lasagna frequency misrepresented up front, and thereby you should be entitled to the occasional spaghetti, or at least a side salad, for the bait and switch?

Maybe you ought to find a way to prepare the plate so she's interested in serving on it?

 

[dameodie]

Hmm... Now that I read that again, I thought it meant the "collective" you... as in "You, in your other different relationship can have an open marriage if that's what floats your boat, but I won't." In fact, my SIL and her husband do just that (don't ask me how it works, I don't want to know the details!!!)

I didn't read it as you-the-spouse...

Anyway, it's totally not for us, but if some other couple can make it work more power to them!

 

[Jeafl]

but what if you're only getting the lasagna once in a great while, like say major holidays only. Wasn't the lasagna frequency misrepresented up front, and thereby you should be entitled to the occasional spaghetti, or at least a side salad, for the bait and switch?

I don't believe my husband and I ever decided on an exact number of times we would eat Italian food. I think we figured we would play it by ear. Perhaps if the wife was asked to cook lasagna more often, there would never be a need to eat spaghetti.

But to answer the original question, NO.

 

[Jeafl]

Maybe you ought to find a way to prepare the plate so she's interested in serving on it?

good point

 

[poohandwendy]

good point

LOL, very, very good point!

I think it's sad that some people think personal gratification is more important than finding a way to make their married life together interesting and fulfilling.

 

[JoiseyMom]

LOL, very, very good point!

I think it's sad that some people think personal gratification is more important than finding a way to make their married life together interesting and fulfilling.

That is very well said. ITA!

 

[DVC Sadie]

I'd say to my dh, "Sure you can have an open marriage-right after you sign the divorce papers,give me half of everything and sign the alimony checks every month."

You are way too generous!! I would tell my dh that I require "everything" except for his guns.

 

[Malificient Tater]

no way. If we are married that is it, that is all you get. I would not run for a divorce but alot of talking would be involved

 

[I Love Pluto]

Marriage is commitment. That's all there is - commitment to each other. No variations of any kind.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Nope. No way, no how. If you want to be married, then be married. If you want to be single, then be single.

Why be married have to put up with all the shopping, cooking, cleaning & financial aggravation while he is out having his "open marriage"?

It is like the bar saying, "Last call, you don't have to go home, but you need to leave".
If you are "dating" you aren't living with me.