Angelrose's Journey

[Angelrose]

Hi Julie. That was my mom's name. Actually her name was Angelina but everyone called her Julie.

I had another great day today. My friend called me this afternoon from the Mayfest and asked if I wanted some company. You bet I was. We had a nice visit and then they treated me to dinner at a place I'd never been before. It's called Oyster Creek and they specialize in seafood. I can't eat seafood, but they had a marvelous chicken dish. It was a chicken breast stuffed with spinach. cheese and sweet red peppers and covered in a red pepper sauce. OMG it was the best chicken dinner I've ever had. We had a nice view of the bay and the marshes. We laughed a lot. Her husband is a super nice guy and Ron and he got along famously.

Although Cliff was really MEAN to Pat today. He FORCED her, yes I said FORCED her to eat a chocolate covered strawberry he bought for her at the Mayfest. He threatened to give it to a nice looking young lady if she didn't eat it. Now how mean was that? Poor, Pat has to put up with a lot.

We had such a nice visit and then they drove me home. It was a wonderful surprise.

 

[amyy]

Great pictures. Thanks for sharing. Happy pink shopping!!!

 

[Angelrose]

Thanks amyy. I'm a bit superstitious about buying baby clothes before she's born. But watch out after that! LOL

Jesse is sick again. This is the third time in two weeks that he has thrown up at daycare. He doesn't have a fever. The pediatrician says that it might be a twisted stomach (reflux). If that is what it is he will outgrow it. If not, they will have to take him to a ped. gastro. They are not looking forward to either of those possibilities. Poor Jesse will have to get some tests done.

I'm going to meet the kids at the lawyers office tomorrow to sign my will and they will sign theirs. I'm glad to have this taken care of.

 

[4nana]

Oh my dearheart, you've had a lot going on in your life lately . Glad you had a nice Mother's Day and are getting out and about in the nice weather.

Thx for sharing new family pix and congrats on the pink bundle of joy to be - I know you can't wait for princess Zoey. As you've already discoved grands have a sweet way of putting a bright spot in each day.

Hope the new company will hire Chuck, know how stressful that can be and send prayers soemthing comes thru soon. Also that sweet Jesse feels better and it's one of those passing ailments that heals itself.

 

[snapppyd]

Good morning! Sorry I haven't posted - we were in Disney World from May 4th thru the 10th. We stayed at the Beach Club and had a wonderful time. It was so hot we spent the week at the pool and only went to Epcot once to see Davey Jones (remember The Monkees?)

A girl!!! How exciting! I love the name Zoey

Good luck to Chuck on the job front. I'm sure he will do just fine.

Angel, I know Manahawkin - we do all our shopping there! I love that ShopRite and Kohl's. We try to get over to LBI to walk on the beach every chance we get. I'm sorry the ride was so stressful for you. I had a similar experience two weeks ago. I was going to my dentist in Holmdel and got stuck in the express lanes on the Garden State. I ended up almost ten miles past my exit I found a rest area and got turned around. I was alone in the car and it was a little scary. Oh well, makes us stronger, right?

Hope everyone has a great day, we are having rain right now.

 

[Angelrose]

Thanks 4nana. Grands are wonderful at healing the heart. Princess Zoey will be a joy to me along with Jesse. He felt fine this morning and couldn't wait to go to daycare.

snappyd, I'm glad you had a great time at Disney World. You must tell us all about it.

As far as the Garden State Parkway, it is very scary for someone who only drives close to home. At least now I know where the auto place is and I can get to it. And I will remember that it is a toll road.

 

[Angelrose]

Hello my friends. I have been doing pretty good for the last few days. I knew that this week would be hard. It will be one year ago tomorrow that he fell. But I know my Ron would be looking out for me.

Last night I thought I heard him in bed with me. I wanted to reach for his arm. I heard him start to turn over and I yelled WAIT, wait, wait. I finally reached his arm. I could feel it and feel the hairs on his arm. It was warm and so alive. Then he turned over. I woke up and actually expected to see him next to me. I realized it was a dream and said Thank You. He was telling me that he is always near me.

I'm going to try and keep very busy tomorrow. Chuck is coming over in the afternoon to take measurements of the work table that he wants to bring to his house. Then Friday afternoon he and his buddy will come over and take it out. It will be good to see him tomorrow. It will help.

 

[minniecarousel]

I'll be thinking of you tomorrow and sending good thoughts your way. What a lovely dream.

Take care.

 

[Angelrose]

Thank you Julie. I'll need all the prayers and good thoughts I can get.

 

[Minnie&Nana]

Oh, Angelrose You've been in my thoughts this week...Tomorrow will be holding you ever so near in heart and prayer.

Without a doubt Ron came to you to help get you through the next difficult days and weeks. Bless his heart....and yours too.

 

[Angelrose]

Thank you Christine. That dream was so real. I mean I could actually FEEL his arm and the hairs on his arm. Maybe it wasn't a dream? He is still taking care of me.

 

[Minnie&Nana]

Thank you Christine. That dream was so real. I mean I could actually FEEL his arm and the hairs on his arm. Maybe it wasn't a dream? He is still taking care of me.

I absolutely believe Ron is taking care of you! My son, Toby, has come to me and my DD. I know and understand.

I'm sorry I haven't been around as much...but will be again. Miss you.

 

[java]

What a wonderful dream! Thinking and praying for you Angelrose. I agree maybe it wasn't a dream.

 

[Angelrose]

I've missed you too! It's nice to chat with you again.

Chuck just called and asked me to go to the mall with them tomorrow morning to pick out a new phone. I think they just don't want me to be alone tomorrow.

 

[Angelrose]

Thank you Java. I really think he was visiting me.

 

[ksumn1]

I think it was Ron. Either that or a very strong memory. Either way, I'm glad it brought you comfort. I hope tomorrow won't be too rough for you. I'll be thinking of you.

 

[snapppyd]

 

[4nana]

Angelrose, know your Dis friends hold you close to their hearts and in prayer today, as your dear Ron smiles upon and guides you from above. Godspeed

 

[auntie]

Angelrose...I don't post here often but do check regulary. You are in my thoughts and prayers. You've been very brave this past year, and I'm quite sure your beloved Ron is so proud of you. From the early days of your request for prayer, through out your experiences this past year dealing with your loss, you have been an inspiration. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and your memories with us. It has been a privilege to read them.

 

[Angelrose]

ksumn1, snappyd, 4nana, and auntie thank you so much for the hugs and good thoughts today.

Today wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. It helped that I kept really busy. I went out early and weed whacked for 45 minutes and I was DONE. I came in and got a bath and then Chuck called to tell me they were on their way to pick me up to get a new phone. It was so good to see Karen and Chuck. They do make my heart smile. We got to the mall a few minutes before it opened and just sat and waited for the Verizon store to open. The kids were being goofy and I just had to laugh.

I picked out my phone and so did Chuck, Karen had to decide on which Blackberry she wanted. She finally settled on the Tour which she LOVES. While they were getting everything arranged I sat down on a bench in the store and started looking at my watch. I knew just when Ron fell and what time I found him. It was so hard not to burst into tears. Karen must have sensed what I was feeling and asked if I was alright. That kind of broke the train of thought. I smiled and said I was fine.

When we finished with the phones, Karen, Zoey and I were hungry and decided to have lunch at the food court. Karen got a chicken ceasar salad, I got a bacon cheeseburger and onion rings and Chuck just got fries and a grape soda. Well one of us had a healthful lunch.

I was so tired when I got home that I took a nap. When I got up I started watching tv and then the tears came. I couldn't help it. I remember how he looked after surgery. I had such hope that he would wake up. But he didn't.

I have tried to be strong because I knew Ron would want me to. Sometimes I have a good day and remember all the good times we had together. Other times those same memories bring me to tears.

I still have those moments when I want to have a temper tantrum and yell that I want him back with me. Thankfully those are further apart than they used to be.

Friday Chuck will be here to get the work bench with his buddy. Saturday the kids are taking me out to lunch at Red Robin (my choice) for my birthday. I will get to spend some time with my sweet Jesse and that will help a lot. My next big hurdle will be in a few weeks, the anniversary of his passing. That will be a bad day I know. I'll just have to live through it the best I can.