We'd spent all that time and effort, risking life and loss of limb to get to Hana, and yet...at some point, we had to go back. But first things first: we needed lunch.
In continuing our family's tradition of attempting to keep costs down while traveling, we once again had peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwiches in one of the most beautiful places in the world. In this case, we drove just south of Hana to Hamoa Beach, which is just about the most gorgeous beach you'll ever see in your lifetime. We parked along the road, unloaded our stuff, and found a downed tree trunk under some shade just off to the side of the beach.
Our lunchtime view:
We sat, looking out from the east coast of Maui over the vast Pacific Ocean, enjoying the crash of the waves and the sprawling sand nestled up against the rocky wall framing the beach. I'm pretty sure I contemplated something along those lines as I shoved fistfuls of Maui onion chips into my mouth and slapped everyone else's hands away from the bag.
Hamoa Beach is a great place for body-boarding, as you can get some terrific waves on this side of the island. Unfortunately, it can also get extremely rough and rip currents can develop, so its strictly swim-at-your-own risk. The kids asked if they could get their feet wet, and being the loving and spontaneous parents that we are, we checked to make sure we didn't have to pay anything and then told them to go ahead.
Ok, they did actually get their feet wet. Just trust me on that one.
Our next stop was Haleakala National Park. Now, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, "Did I leave the oven on?" Or, "I think we should just get pizza tonight, because I really dont feel like cooking."
But after that, when you remember that you feel obligated to finish this chapter, you're probably thinking, Didnt they already visit Haleakala National Park?
And the answer is: yes. Yes, we did. However, there's another section of it, way the heck down here on the southeast side of the mountain, and that was the part we wanted to visit. Its called the Kipahulu region of the park.
Down in this neck of the woods, you can take a few hikes and enjoy the scenery. The most visited part of the park is O'heo Gulch, otherwise known as the Seven Sacred Pools. In my reading I learned the storied history of this name. Come, gather by the fire as I share it with you now, so you can preserve the tale for future generations:
Many moons ago, a water feature along a stream running down Haleakala to the ocean featured several small waterfalls, forming pools at the bottom of each one. This water feature was known to locals as O'heo Gulch.
Skipping ahead to the 20th century, a hotel owner in Hana decided tourists wouldnt go out of their way to a place called O'heo Gulch, so he advertised it as the Seven Sacred Pools to drum up business. There are not seven of them and they were never sacred to anyone. The end.
Whatever the name, we wanted to see the place. Along the trail, we found a banyan tree. The First Rule of Banyan Trees is: always stop to play in the banyan tree.
The trail led to the coast, and from there we could walk up along the gulch.
The entire hike was about ½ to ¾ of a mile and involved some climbing, but wasn't terrible. However, it was early afternoon and getting to be the hottest part of the day, and Julie and Scotty were both laboring a bit. No, not that kind of labor--Julie and the baby were fine. But baby was making it tough to keep going. There was another hike we wanted to do, but it was 2 miles (one way) to see a 400 waterfall. We decided to start walking and see how it went. We could always turn around if it was too much. What could go wrong?
Well, this trail was pretty tough. It was uphill. Very, very uphill. We kept plowing for a while, knowing that there was supposed to be a waterfall at the ¾-mile mark. We climbed, rested, climbed, rested, and asked people coming down how much farther we had to go. Then--
Look! Its a waterfall!
Yeah, it's a nice fall, but the view was a bit disappointing. You couldn't really see through the vegetation to get a clear view of it.
We climbed a bit farther. Supposedly there was a bamboo forest along the way. Scotty started to ask how much longer we'd be hiking. Sweat was pouring down his brow.
We climbed a bit farther. Julie started to ask how much longer we'd be hiking. Sweat poured from her brow.
Finally, the trail leveled out a bit and the walk was easier, except for mud puddles we had to avoid along the way. After a bit more walking, we found a bridge leading to the bamboo forest.
Well, there it is. Now we can say we've seen a bamboo forest. One thing I will say: this stuff makes for great camouflage if you need to sneak up on somebody.
Ok, with that picture, either I'm just giving in to my usual idiocy, or I needed to clown around to prevent meltdowns from various members of the party. We gulped down some water and considered our options:
1. Keep going another ¾-mile or so to see the 400 waterfall.
2. Turn around and head back to the air-conditioned car.
We chose option 2. I know, you don't get to see a 400 waterfall everyday, but these guys were done. More hiking would not have gone over well. If things went right, we would have another chance to see a huge waterfall later in the trip. And the last thing we needed was to be airlifted out of here.
The family was a bunch of troopers and successfully made it back to the car. We had one more quick stop on this side of the mountain. There's an unmarked tiny side road that leads toward the coast. Down this short road is a tiny church.
And behind this tiny church is a tiny graveyard. This nondescript yard is the final resting place of Charles Lindbergh, the first pilot who ever flew non-stop across the Atlantic.
When dying of cancer, his doctors in New York told him to stay in the city for treatment. He told them he was returning to Maui to die there, reasoning that hed rather live a few days on Maui than a few weeks in New York.
Interesting side note: Lindbergh's friend is also buried nearby, along with his "children": several pet monkeys.
Now it was decision time. We needed to get back to Kula for the night. We could either turn around and go back the way we came--through Hana, the 620 curves, 52 one-lane bridges, and all that--or keep going around the south side of the mountain.
We had consulted the guidebook. It argued for continuing around the mountain. After all, you already saw the road to Hana. Why not see something new? Hard to argue with that.
Unless, of course, your car rental agreement prohibits driving on this road. Here, the guidebook argued that most rental agreements prohibit you from driving the car on unimproved roads. But what does that mean? The road on the south side of Haleakala is dirt/gravel for a few miles, but it is regularly graded by state forces, cleared when needed, and the pavement gets patched. Sounds like improvements to me. If the agreement says you can't drive on unpaved roads, it's a little less gray. But then again, there are dirt roads all over the island. The agent at the counter had not forbidden me from driving on any roads when going over the paperwork with me.
Even if you do drive on an unimproved road, violating the agreement most likely means they won't come rescue your sorry behind and you're paying for repairs. Which your current insurance often covers anyway.
Fortunately for us, there was a very temporary service available from a group called
Deus Ex Machina where we could arrange to have someone drive the rental car back around the other way to Kula for us while we borrowed a different vehicle that was approved for all roads to continue the drive. I don't have the details on it with me, but it sure worked out great.
So, we continued on in our new improved vehicle. If you thought the Highway to Hana looked like a tough ride, this was the Highway to H-E-Double Hockey Sticks. At a certain point on this road, the regular, consistent paving stops. I don't know why it stops where it does, but in its place is ancient, crumbling pavement littered with thousands upon thousands of poor patching jobs.
We rumbled, bumbled, and stumbled our way through a couple of miles of this, and then things got really hairy. If the previous drive had run along the edge of the coast, well, this road was literally cut into the side of a cliff:
We drove around hairpin turns in this manner, bouncing all over the place. At one point, and I wish we'd been quick enough on the draw to get a picture, we crossed a bridge that had railings made of (I'm not making this up) PVC pipe. I'm sure thats crash-worthy, right? I offered to turn around and go back to get a picture of it, but for some reason Julie didn't want to. At least, I think that's what her shrieking meant.
Actually, we had a good case of the giggles going in the car at this point, just marveling at how bad the road was. We'd turn the corner and see another piece of road jutting out from the cliff and just laugh about the fact that we actually had to drive on that.
There was a minivan driving ahead of us. Somewhere along the drive, we had to crest a ridge. We drove up the hill, watching the van climb ahead. As we got to the top of the hill, the van plunged down the other side...
...and
dropped completely out of sight.
We paused at the top, in silence. I figured it was probably a good idea to make sure the van re-appeared before we tried it. Sure enough, we spotted it below and started laughing again. Then we continued over the ridge, the only way we knew how--with hands raised in the air! Laughing all the way down.
Yup, the driver too. I mean, at this point, why not? I made some kind of comment about how this was what our vacations were all about--the kids would never, ever forget driving this road.
I can confirm that the road does indeed become a dirt road for a while. Ironically, this part was easier to drive than the paved portion.
Ya think?
Heres what they think of people attempting this drive:
The really amazing thing about this drive was the desolate, barren look of the mountain. It was absolutely stunning to think that we'd seen nothing but lush, green gardens and waterfalls everywhere during the morning drive, and this was the same mountain.
Would I do it again? I'd say yes. Not only did the drive turn out to be extremely memorable, but I think the sights on that side of the mountain were totally different, and worth seeing just to be able to comprehend the incredible diversity of life, climate, and weather patterns in such a relatively small geographical area. And we didn't die, so that was a plus.
Eventually it does turn into a real road again, and you're afforded a great view of Kahoolawe, Lanai, and the tiny piece of land known as Molokini.
That night, my aunt and cousin prepared a meal of traditional Hawaiian foods for us. Because my aunt is of Chinese heritage, there were a few Chinese foods in there too, like teriyaki beef. We had kalua pork, some kind of bright red pork (Chinese), bbq short ribs, sliced pineapples, rice, and that old Hawaiian standby, poi. I must quote the guidebook here, as it encouraged, "Try some poi, so you can badmouth it with authority".
I can hereby state that the guidebook is accurate. Poi a mostly tasteless purple paste derived from taro roots. I'm not sure who had the bright idea to pound taro roots to make a purple tasteless goo, but there you have it. It does have a slightly bitter aftertaste reminiscent of Beverly.
On the other hand, my aunt also produced a purple sweet potato. Yes, it's a sweet potato, but completely purple in color. We'd never seen this before. Julie bit into a piece and raved about it the rest of the evening. I thought it was...meh. But then again, I've never been a big sweet potato fan.
Still, everything else was great. I could have eaten the kalua pork, the ribs, and the beef all night long. Come to think of it, I probably did.
Coming Up Next: Surfing lessons! Will there be carnage? Will there be shark bait? Will there be a cameo from someone related to a DISboard member?
Soooo close...
I will tell you what... that bridge does NOT look stable!
But what a cool shot!
And you say there's something coming up next to make it seem tame??
