Amy's New Start : Comments Welcome!

[lovinaz]

Wow, that is a big cut. But I know you'll get through it.

Did you go to WW today? And yes, you are right, eating out is one of the easiest things to cut back on!

 

[Amy&Dan]

Thanks Ladies,

I went to WW and was up .4 Considering I was up three pounds yesterday, I decided to just be okay with that. But the fact is, I have gained two pounds in two weeks now. Not exactly the direction I had hoped for. Stress and a difficult weekend were probably to blame more than anything. And as usual, my cycle is messed up. All week long I could feel TOM coming on, but it never did.

I skipped dd's conference. I cannot believe I did that. I regularly email with her teachers, check her grades online at least twice a week, but still. I was just so discouraged after weigh in and a sleepless night, I couldn't seem to get out the door and over there. But I did pull it together and take her to lunch. We split a hamburger, I had skipped breakfast and she had slept through it (ahh the joys of being 13 and having a day off!). Then we each got our own pie. It was very tasty!

I guess we shouldn't have eaten out, but she and I had this day planned for over a month. At least we split a lunch. Then Dan and I have that birthday party at Old Chicago tonight. We plan to each have a drink and that's it. I had to tell my friend I coudln't make her birthday party tomorrow night. It was at an expensive restaurant and then a comedy club afterwards which was two tickets and a two drink minimum per person. She understood. Tomorrow afternoon, we have a church potluck. That will be tough since church potlucks are generally known for being comfort food fests but then again, I dont' like to pig out in front of strangers so that may help! I had originally planned to not eat at that since we had a birthday dinner to go to after, but now, well, we'll see how I do. Then Sunday is the whole family here for my stepdad's 85th birthday dinner. It will be the first time we have all been together since last Christmas. Hopefully it will go better than that did. I got a spiral sliced ham (stepdad's fave) and I am making scallopped potatoes and a carrot cake. Diet Disaster if I let it be. Really have to watch the portions at all of these things. What I need is a very low key weekend with nothing planned to get on track. I think that should be the plan next weekend. A "no plans" planned two days!

I need to work out four times next week, I only did three times this week. Better than nothing but not good enough clearly.

I am going to be doing some more work for my real estate agent friend. Her business has really picked up and she needs some help so that will be a good thing.

Tracy: Thanks so much for those websites. I need to look at those this weekend and I am betting they will give me a lot of great tips and advice.

Lisa: I don 't have a Toys R Us anywhere near me. What I would love is a night stocking kind of thing. That way I wouldn't have to worry about how I was going to pick up dd from school. But maybe the real estate thing will turn into something more consistent which would be great. This year and next at this school, then I will have so much more ability to work outside the home.

Amy: Thanks for stopping by and yes, eating out is easy enough to cut out! And my waistline will thank me.

 

[traceycooper]

Hi Amy - i'm so sorrry to hear about Dans pay cut, but glad you are trying to be positive
Glad you had a nice lunch with DD

 

[toystoryduo]

Amy,

I hope the websites help. I have tons more, but I figured I would share some of my favorite ones first.

Please don't let the weigh-in get you down. I bet next week you'll see a nice loss on the scale. Enjoy yourself this weekend and try to relax. You can get back OP on Monday.

I hope you have a nice weekend! Happy Birthday to your stepdad!

 

[Amy&Dan]

I was a very, very bad girl last night. I didn't stick to one drink and an early night, instead we stayed for about four hours, I had more drinks than I will admit to you all and split a massive order of nachos with Dan. We spent four times what I had hoped, I blew my diet and my budget which is the last thing I should be doing. On the other hand, I had a fabulous time.

Ds was on the news today! He's working at a big food drive one of our local news stations does every year and we got to see him unloading trucks with other sherriff cadets. He looked quite handsome and very grown up. Glad I didn't have to get up at 5:30 on a cold, snowy day and unload trucks and car loads of food and toys. I might not have survived that!

And it looks that Dan's pay will be stable through the end of the year. So that is a huge blessing. We are just going to cut back, hope for the best and stay positive. We've been through this sort of thing before and we lived to tell about it so this time shouldn't be looked at as any different at this stage.

Hope everyone is having a very nice weekend. My plan is to hopefully eat small portions at the potluck and then go to the rec center tomorrow if I can make it out (supposed to have 10 inches of snow).

Later:

Well I ate Taco Bell for lunch, only two things but still. Oh well, I needed something sort of spicy and greasy to settle my stomach! The good news is that I'll be too full to eat anything at that potluck. I counted the points, I am fine and I made a big fruit salad to eat at home tonight. I also found a lower fat scalloped potatoes recipe for tomorrow, the ham is lean so that meal should be fine. I even wonder if my sister and nephew will make it up for that given the storm we are supposed to have. I know that at the very least, we can just take the food over to my stepdad's since we have AWD on our Ford. So we'll celebrate his day one way or the other.

 

[toystoryduo]

Ten inches of snow?!?!?!? Say it isn't so! Winter always comes way too quickly doesn't it? If you have to go out, please drive carefully.

I'm glad to hear that Dan's pay will be stable through the end of the year. Maybe once the new year comes around, they'll decide not to give him the paycut. We're praying for you both!

Have a good time with your stepdad today.

 

[lovinaz]

On the other hand, I had a fabulous time.

Sometimes that is worth the extra points and the hangover! Been there, done that! But I bet you got it out of your system and won't be doing it again any time soon!

How cool that DS was on the news! What a wonderful young man you have raised, I know you are so proud of him.

That is great that the salary cut won't happen until next year. Hopefully that will give you enough time to adjust and have a less painful transition.

I hope you have a good b-day with stepdad.

 

[Amy&Dan]

Thanks Amy and Tracy.

We got very bad news last night. We were at church and Dan's cell went off, he saw it was his dad's partner, he stepped out and I knew as soon as we he came back in it was bad news. Dan's dad was at the hospital, they had taken him by ambulance when he became first incoherant and then completely unresponsive at home. The day before, on Friday, he had fallen and hit his head, gone into the ER, they put in four stitches, did a cat scan, thought it was fine and sent him home. However, at some point, he began to bleed inside his head and he developed a subdural hematoma. He is completely brain dead and not expected to live more than a couple of days. We are in shock and of course Dan is devastated. To have his dad go through so much in the last six weeks, only to end up like this.

Right now he is on life support, because he didn't have it written in his directive to not do that (why I don't know because he told us he never wanted to end up like this) So we have to wait for nature to take its course. Life support or not, his systems will still shut down over the next few days and he'll die. But the waiting is so hard, on Dan and his aunt (fil's sister) in particular. We waited up all night waiting for the call only to find out that in fact, it may be several days.

I told Dan we could go out there, but he doesn't want to go. He says he cannot bear to see his dad laying there, hooked up to tubes and not being able to do anything to help. He says he wants to remember him the way he was. His aunt is also not going and fil's life partner agrees and says he is okay and has plenty of friends out there to support him and is more glad we were there last month twice rather than this time.

Fil was adamnat he didn't want any sort of funeral, but instead, wants his ashes scattered here in Colorado. We'll have to wait until spring, the place he's requested (where Dan's grandparents ashes were also placed) is high up in the mountains and until the snow melts we can't really get up there. Also, his aunt his having some health issues right now and this will give her time to get that situated and travel when its warmer.

So we just have to wait in limbo until its over. Dan says as far as he's concerned, his dad is gone already. But I know he needs that final call to let him know its really over before he can begin to grieve.

So that is our latest. I will be so thankful when this over. I am so glad we went out there last month for the surgery. We really all thought it would give him a chance for a better life and if not for all these set backs and then this freak accident it probably would have.

Thanks for reading and all your support through this ordeal. I tell Dan all the time my Wish Sisters are praying for his dad and he thanks you.

 

[DisDee]

Amy, I am so sorry to hear the news about your FIL. My thoughts and prayers go out to your family in hopes that you'll find peace as you wait. I completely understand how Dan feels about remembering his Dad from before. He needs to do what is best for him through this difficult time.

 

[toystoryduo]

Oh Amy,

Sweetie, I am so sorry to hear about your FIL. We are praying for your family.

 

[lovinaz]

How horrible about your FIL. I am so sorry that you guys have to go through this! How wonderful that you at least got to spend some time with him these past few weeks. My thoughts are with you and your family during this difficult time.

 

[toystoryduo]

Sending a and prayers for your family, Amy.

 

[Amy&Dan]

Thanks everyone. No change as of yet. He has been moving his leg and one arm some, and appears to turn his head a bit when someone is talking to him. But they had a fourth neurologist come in and do a consult and the prognosis was the same. No chance for recovery. Dan and I are not certain if maybe fil's partner is just unable to come to terms with this and is maybe imagining some things or what the deal is. Because Dan is not the primary POA, the nurses and doctors will not tell us a thing. I checked into airfare for maybe Dan and I to go out but its sky high and Dan is still saying he doesn't want to go out. He is taking the word of the doctor's and not fil's well meaning but at times completely off balance partner. I think this guy is feeling so guilty that he left fil at home alone (which all of us say he shouldn't, he couldn't be there 24/7) which is when he fell and that is causing him to just be unable to come to terms with all of this.

The waiting and wondering are hard, but we are so exhausted and sleep deprived we are starting to just feel more numb and less anxious.

At first they said even on the ventilator he would die in a couple of days, now it appears he may have just enough brain function to sustain life indefinitely without ever waking up or being able to use his brain to think or be aware. So sad.

So we just have to wait and see what happens. In the meantime, I am sort of stressed and not doing as well with food as I hoped. My plan is to get the house organized today (the dishes from Saturday's dinner were still in the sink this morning), get laundry caught up, get to the store and then tomorrow hoepfully get to the gym and get back on schedule. Dan and I both realize we have to get back into some sort of routine and daily life since this could apparently go on for a very long time.

 

[toystoryduo]

Sending a for you both and prayers for God's peace and strength during this difficult time. If there is anything we can do for you, please let us know.

 

[lovinaz]

What a horrible, difficult thing to have to deal with. I hope your family is able to get back into your routine, like you said, maybe that will help digest what is going on and make it a little easier to bear.

 

[Amy&Dan]

Thanks Amy and Tracy.

God help my poor fil. They now may transfer him to a nursing home in the next week or so. There is no change, probably won't be and I just can't think of a fate worse than this. Dan is just beside himself that his dad is somehow aware of what is happening. My fil was the kind of person who hated to be bored or doing nothing. He would have never wanted this, of course nobody would.

In the meantime we just pray that either he begins to show signs of improvement soon, or that God releases him from this situation and lets him die.

Dan and I are trying to get some sort of normalcy returned. I finally got to the store today and made dinner for us tonight, we took dd to her usual Wednesday night youth group and I also told Dan to leave early so we could go for a walk. Exercise is a good stress reliever and now more than ever, he and I both need to take good care of ourselves. So we got a 30 minute walk in before it got dark and that was good for both of us.

Thanks for reading and your continued prayers. As much as my fil needed them through his surgery and hospital stays, he needs them more than ever now.

 

[Amy&Dan]

Oops, forgot to post my food:

Breakfast: Slim Fast: 4
Snack: Mini Luna, skm milk: 4
Lunch: Southwest salad from Chick Fil A: 10
Dinner: Bisquick Cheeseburger Pie, 1/2 cup mixed veggies, 1/2 apple: 9
Snack: Wheat thins: 3
Total: 30

Right on target and I got in some exercise so I am overal very happy with myself. Today was my day to meet my friend (we always do Chick Fil A, its halfway between us) and I wisely looked up points. By doing the salad, even with the whole packet of dressing, I ate for nine points less than if I had done a grilled sandwich with fries. Buns and fries are killer. And that salad is very tasty.

I have officially turned into my mother. I have made casseroles with Bisquick two times in the past two weeks. But she was no fool, they were both very delish and very easy to make. And to think I used to make fun of her for cooking with pancake mix all the time.

 

[toystoryduo]

Oh Amy,

My heart goes out to you, Dan, the kids and your FIL and his partner as well. I wish there was something more I could do.

Great job on food yesterday! Thanks for the WW info in my journal. I may give it a try.

Sending our love and prayers.....

 

[lovinaz]

I love Bisquik recipes! I make Cheeseburger Pie a lot, and also the BBQ Chicken Bake. Quick and easy!

Great job behaving amidst all the turmoil these past few days! And you are right, exercise is a huge stress reliever, so keep it up!

Hang in there.

 

[eyor44]

Oh Amy, my heart just broke when I read about FIL. and to be so far away and not really know what is going on. Been there. I will keep you all in my prayers.