Am I wrong for feeling this way? Venting.

[IheartMickey]

They moved to FL being from Queens in August. This friend has a mother, two disabled brothers and a sites get in the area. When did the Mom meet her friend? Did her friend just move down to FL after being invited by the Mom or did the Mom just meet her and let her move in shortly there after?

She's known this friend since she was 9, they grew up together. The friend and their entire family all decided to move down to FL at the same time as they are a close knit family. They have been here several years.

That's it, I'm done.

 

[Allison]

This is going to be the last time I answer anymore questions. When I was TTC I had a considerable amount of money in the bank, plus SSD gives you an additional check per child. The additional check is half the amount of your first check. I added up the cost of formula, diapers and other supplies each month and I'd still have several hundred extra to put in the bank each month for emergencies.

Really? You were going to have a child, collect an extra SSD check because you had a child and then put several hundred extra away each month?

 

[IheartMickey]

Really? You were going to have a child, collect an extra SSD check because you had a child and then put several hundred extra away each month?

So you're trying to say that disabled people shouldn't have children? Because that seems like what you're implying.

 

[kimblebee]

My advice to you is to leave this thread and don't come back. Things are about to go from bad to worse. Quickly. I hope things work out for you and your mom.

 

[JoiseyMom]

So you're trying to say that disabled people shouldn't have children? Because that seems like what you're implying.

OP, stop, it isn't worth it. THe judgment police are just that. OMG how can you do this, I wouldn't. Well, you do what is good for you! If you want a child, go for it. If every person waited to be able to afford their kids, we would die off or the 1 percenters would totally take over .

Good luck with your job, and I hope you kick that moocher to the curb!

 

[JessB320]

I always thought the boards here had a pretty strict rule about no personal attacks. Yet, many of the posts on this thread are most defiantly personal attacks. People need to knock it off.

 

[Allison]

So you're trying to say that disabled people shouldn't have children? Because that seems like what you're implying.

No, not at all. Just trying to be clear on the facts.

 

[mnrose]

So you're trying to say that disabled people shouldn't have children? Because that seems like what you're implying.

I think people should have as many children as THEY can support. I don't care whether you are disabled or run marathons. If YOU (NOT the government) can support your child, financially and emotionally, go right ahead and have children. If, however, your means of support is the government, then, no, you cannot afford children and should not have them.

It is one thing to fall upon hard times when you already have children, and therefore need to rely on the government for a short while in order to support your family. But, to TTC when you cannot support yourself without government assistance is just plain wrong. It is part of the entitlement mentality that is driving this country into bankruptcy. And, just for the record, I am a liberal person in my politics. I am generous to a fault. But, even I have problems with people continuing to make children when they cannot even financially support themselves.

 

[Janepod]

I think people should have as many children as THEY can support. I don't care whether you are disabled or run marathons. If YOU (NOT the government) can support your child, financially and emotionally, go right ahead and have children. If, however, your means of support is the government, then, no, you cannot afford children and should not have them.

It is one thing to fall upon hard times when you already have children, and therefore need to rely on the government for a short while in order to support your family. But, to TTC when you cannot support yourself without government assistance is just plain wrong. It is part of the entitlement mentality that is driving this country into bankruptcy. And, just for the record, I am a liberal person in my politics. I am generous to a fault. But, even I have problems with people continuing to make children when they cannot even financially support themselves.

 

[JoiseyMom]

I always thought the boards here had a pretty strict rule about no personal attacks. Yet, many of the posts on this thread are most defiantly personal attacks. People need to knock it off.

You are new here. It seems to be the norm for all the years I have been here. People judge others, because they make decisions that the judgers would never do! So if they wouldn't do it, they don't understand how anyone else could!

Wait, have you read the threads where the judgers take the time to search the DIS to repost what the OP's have said in past posts? Wow, that is enjoyable!!

 

[JessB320]

You are new here. It seems to be the norm for all the years I have been here. People judge others, because they make decisions that the judgers would never do! So if they wouldn't do it, they don't understand how anyone else could!

Wait, have you read the threads where the judgers take the time to search the DIS to repost what the OP's have said in past posts? Wow, that is enjoyable!!

It may be the norm but that doesn't make it acceptable

 

[JoiseyMom]

I think people should have as many children as THEY can support. I don't care whether you are disabled or run marathons. If YOU (NOT the government) can support your child, financially and emotionally, go right ahead and have children. If, however, your means of support is the government, then, no, you cannot afford children and should not have them.

It is one thing to fall upon hard times when you already have children, and therefore need to rely on the government for a short while in order to support your family. But, to TTC when you cannot support yourself without government assistance is just plain wrong. It is part of the entitlement mentality that is driving this country into bankruptcy. And, just for the record, I am a liberal person in my politics. I am generous to a fault. But, even I have problems with people continuing to make children when they cannot even financially support themselves.

Thats great, and is your choice and your opinion. Isn't it wonderful that being a USA citizen OP and others can make their own choices, and then they and only they live with those choices.

 

[IheartMickey]

I think people should have as many children as THEY can support. I don't care whether you are disabled or run marathons. If YOU (NOT the government) can support your child, financially and emotionally, go right ahead and have children. If, however, your means of support is the government, then, no, you cannot afford children and should not have them.

It is one thing to fall upon hard times when you already have children, and therefore need to rely on the government for a short while in order to support your family. But, to TTC when you cannot support yourself without government assistance is just plain wrong. It is part of the entitlement mentality that is driving this country into bankruptcy. And, just for the record, I am a liberal person in my politics. I am generous to a fault. But, even I have problems with people continuing to make children when they cannot even financially support themselves.

I would gladly trade you all of the pain I suffer through every day so I could go back to work full time. I would do it in a heart beat.

 

[JoiseyMom]

It may be the norm but that doesn't make it acceptable

Well it happens here all the time. The adage of if you don't have anything nice to say, so don't say anything at all doesn't happen. What does happen is it being justified, well if you put it on a public message board then that is what you get.

 

[phorsenuf]

I always thought the boards here had a pretty strict rule about no personal attacks. Yet, many of the posts on this thread are most defiantly personal attacks. People need to knock it off.

I'm not seeing any personal attacks. I see opinions. Just because you may not agree with them doesn't mean they are attacking someone.

 

[IheartMickey]

Oh, and for the record.. SSD is not considered government assistance. Things like Medicaid, welfare and food stamps are government assistance. I do not collect any of that. You pay into SSD every time you collect a paycheck. It's like an insurance policy.

I'd like to see any one of you get hurt, or become sick and someone tell you that you no longer deserve the right to procreate because you are now a considered a second class citizen.

 

[Sam81]

So you're trying to say that disabled people shouldn't have children? Because that seems like what you're implying.

I’ll bite. Yes I think disabled people should not have children. One parent needs to be able to run, sit, stand, etc…What if there was a fire? What if your child fell into a pool? Having kids, especially small kids is grueling. I am in pretty good shape for an older guy and I could not handle a newborn.

Also the mere fact that you think it is ok to TAKE money from the government to support YOUR child is absurd.

 

[wvjules]

Oh, and for the record.. SSD is not considered government assistance. Things like Medicaid, welfare and food stamps are government assistance. I do not collect any of that. You pay into SSD every time you collect a paycheck. It's like an insurance policy.

I'd like to see any one of you get hurt, or become sick and someone tell you that you no longer deserve the right to procreate because you are now a considered a second class citizen.

Oh please...no one said that.

 

[mnrose]

Thats great, and is your choice and your opinion. Isn't it wonderful that being a USA citizen OP and others can make their own choices, and then they and only they live with those choices.

See, here's the thing though. When anyone makes a choice to have a child while they are on assistance, they are making a choice for ME too. They are making the "choice" that they will make me (and any other taxpayer) pay more so they can have a child. I am not ok with that "choice" at all. Not one little bit. My choice to have children is one that *I* pay for. I paid 100% to conceive them (a lot in my case as I had my twins with IVF), and pay 100% to raise them. You can describe that quite accurately as my choice. However, people on public assistance are choosing for all of us.


As I said before, I have absolutely no issue with people getting assistance when life deals them a hard blow. I believe strongly in a safety net. But, there's a big difference in supporting children who are already here, and creating new children who also must be supported.

 

[phorsenuf]

Oh, and for the record.. SSD is not considered government assistance. Things like Medicaid, welfare and food stamps are government assistance. I do not collect any of that. You pay into SSD every time you collect a paycheck. It's like an insurance policy.

I'd like to see any one of you get hurt, or become sick and someone tell you that you no longer deserve the right to procreate because you are now a considered a second class citizen.

I think what is raising eyebrows is that you cannot afford to pay your bills and AI can be expensive. So people are just commenting on that. And I suppose you can look as SSD as an insurance policy, but it's an insurance policy for you, not for future children. In that instance it does seem more like the government is supporting your child in that aspect.