Am I right to get upset

[drakethib]

I would send one more email telling him and his wife to get bent.

You were ill trying to give notice of a cancellation.

What a jerk he was to send that response.

 

[DisneyGirl4188]

I would be upset too if I had received that message. So what if you didn't say hi, is it really that big of a deal??

*IF* I were in her position, even if I was upset you didn't say hi, I wouldn't want my DH to say anything to you about it. I would make me seem a little

 

[horseshowmom]

Again, thank you to everyone who has responded, I really do appreciate it. To those who have said that they would have carried on a bit conversation, be it, "Hi Susan, this is CapeCodTenor, how are you? Is John there?" I agree, and normally I do. But what I have an issue with is how this was brought to my attention. The way it was worded, and what I posted is exactly how it was worded, made it sound as if I had a problem with is wife and I called and laid in on her...when that wasn't the case. I'll agree I should have said more...it's the response I got from him that irritated me.

I disagree with you (when you say you should have said more), because this wasn't normal circumstances. Due to the pain you were in, you only spoke as much as you had to, and any reasonable person would have recognized that.

You have no reason to feel like you should have "tried harder" to talk, and the wife needs (as someone else said) to get over herself. I mean, really, how selfish and self-centered can you get.

There was nothing wrong with how you handled it based on the circumstances at hand.

 

[Daxx]

That is ridiculous. That women needs to get her panties out of a twist over nothing. You did nothing wrong.

ITA!!!!!!!!!! Sounds like his wife has to deal w/a lot of his calls at home and is fed up w/ having to play secretary at home. That's not your fault or problem. Tell him that if wife doesn't want to deal w/the calls, then teacher should give out a cell number to contact him at so wifey won't be bothered!

 

[Beth76]

Yes, the wife may have overreacted, but I also believe in speaking to the person who answers the phone. Especially if you know them. Something like:
You: Hi Suzie, how are ya? Good, is John there? But,that's just me.

But it's in no way this woman's job to correct the OPs behavior. That's just rude. And it's even worse that she made her husband do it via email.

OP, I think you have the right to be upset, but I would probably overlook it this one time. I wouldn't bring it up or apologize. If they bring it up again, then I might consider finding a different teacher.

 

[mickeysgal]

There was no need for the voice teacher to bring this up to you. This is business and there is no need to start mixing business and personal talk especially after he most likely explained the headache situation to the wife. Yet the wife still probably moaned and groaned about how she was treated. What he did wrong is to bring it to your attention by chastising you. He needs a lesson in running a business as there was no need to involve you since your behavior was not at all over the top, belligerent, or fowl. (In those cases, I would expect a backlash). Its obvious that he caters to his wife's prima donna status a bit too much. She needs to get over it and he needs to stand up to her - especially if he wants to portray himself as a professional business owner.

 

[ericamanda01]

My un-PC opinion: He probably had to listen to her crab all the rest of the day about it...not your problem by any means, but maybe he promised her he'd say something to shut her up.

If he's a good teacher and you're pleased with everything else, I'd let it go.

I think Maleficent13 got it right. And if that's the case I feel sorry for the music teacher.

 

[MareQ]

Again, thank you to everyone who has responded, I really do appreciate it. To those who have said that they would have carried on a bit conversation, be it, "Hi Susan, this is CapeCodTenor, how are you? Is John there?" I agree, and normally I do. But what I have an issue with is how this was brought to my attention. The way it was worded, and what I posted is exactly how it was worded, made it sound as if I had a problem with is wife and I called and laid in on her...when that wasn't the case. I'll agree I should have said more...it's the response I got from him that irritated me.

Oh please - no conversation is necessary - it was a business call - at BEST you should have said "Hi this is______, may I speak to _____ please" etc and that's all. Throwing in a "how are you" is completely unnecessary unless you have a personal relationship with the person answering the phone or unless you have the time to have a short conversation. When you're making a business call and you're not feeling well - all bets are off as long as you are polite and to the point.

Also - not YOUR fault he doesn't have an office or a business number to call - it's not your choice to call him at home on his personal line - that's HIS choice so TFB if his wife was annoyed at having to handle a business call and was offended because she wasn't greeted "properly".

 

[RickinNYC]

Methinks that your voice coach and his wife need to get their sticks out of their rear ends. Geez. Plus, if he's running a business out of his home, he needs to get himself a second phone line so as not to bother his poor, harried PITA wife.

 

[Luv'sTink]

Perhaps you should find a more profesional voice teacher. That would end the whole problem, no more wife to deal with.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

One more thought--maybe the wife has the hots for you, which would explain why she was upset that you didn't chat with her.

 

[SandraVB79]

Not everyone likes to chat the other person up, I don't like to do that at all, since I hate making phone calls. And in this case, it was a business call, not a "I am calling my friend to have a nice chat and his wife answered so I chatted with her first" call.

Have you thought about the fact that in case you would have chatted with her first, she would have whined that her husband's customers get their nose in her business? That they ask personal questions?
Hey, there are people like that...

 

[mickeysgal]

Methinks that your voice coach and his wife need to get their sticks out of their rear ends. Geez. Plus, if he's running a business out of his home, he needs to get himself a second phone line so as not to bother his poor, harried PITA wife.

Yup, what you said!

Send the wife to the DIS. We'll straighten her out. Give us about an hour.

 

[CapeCodTenor]

Wow, thanks again everyone. After I had a night to cool off and think about this, and reading all these posts, I have decided to let this one go. And, if they mention this on my next voice lesson, I'll make a simple apology and hope they drop it. If she says something else, or wants to drag this out, then I'm prepared to drag this out with her. I don't want to, but I will if I have to. Right now, I don't think this is a fight I'm willing to take on unless I absolutely have to. Thanks again everyone. I have a voice lesson scheduled for this Sunday, so I'll have to keep everyone informed as to what happens.

 

[CapeCodTenor]

On second thought, I think that if they mention this to me on Sunday, I think what I'm going to say is that I didn't appreciate the email. That the way it was written was uncalled for, and that it could have been stated in a different way. She was upset, why I have no idea, that's not a thing to get upset over, but he could told me something, "CapeCodTenor, Susan was a little upset that you didn't say hi to her, just say hi next time," or something like that. I mean, it could have been done in a number of different ways.

 

[grlpwrd]

I realize that when you called you had that splitting headache, but please try to be a bit more cordial over the phone - you're calling my home and not an office, and if Susan answers, at least say hi to her. She was mad that you seemed to treat her like she was the receptionist or a phone operator. That's all.

That's odd. Maybe they want to give you a lesson in manners, too.

Does his wife often go "diva" on people?

 

[Nancyg56]

On second thought, I think that if they mention this to me on Sunday, I think what I'm going to say is that I didn't appreciate the email. That the way it was written was uncalled for, and that it could have been stated in a different way. She was upset, why I have no idea, that's not a thing to get upset over, but he could told me something, "CapeCodTenor, Susan was a little upset that you didn't say hi to her, just say hi next time," or something like that. I mean, it could have been done in a number of different ways.

You are a nicer person than I. I would let it go unless it was brought up at my lesson. Then I would explain that while I sympathize with Susan's issue regarding telephone calls, this is an issue between the two of them and should never have been brought to my attention. I would then explain that I resented the reprimand, and that if a lesson on telephone ettiqutte is needed, I would go to a professional for that. He is my voice coach, and that is the instrution that I pay for. Then I would suggest an answering service in order to avoid having his snippy wife annoying his paying customers.

 

[CapeCodTenor]

That's odd. Maybe they want to give you a lesson in manners, too.

Does his wife often go "diva" on people?

You want to something funny? Other people have mentioned that she's acting like a diva, well...she's a professional singer herself. She does mainly symphonic, orchestral singing. She really doesn't act diva-ish around the house, I guess the whole phone thing is something she picked up from having to call various directors and cunductors...who knows.