Allowance for a 13, almost 14 year old?

[rszdtrvl]

My son needs to start getting a set allowance amount per week.

However, I am at a loss on how much to give him.

He is 13, will be 14 in December.

He is very busy. He is very social, and loves to go on trips with school groups and to the YMCA on the weekend.

We do not have any set chore list. Right now, he is trying to catch up on school work. School is very tough for him right now - just starting 8th grade - and at the moment his grades are more important to me than him doing chores. He missed one day last week due to being sick and he is still trying to catch up. He has a ton of homework each night, plus guitar lessons once a week.

Needless to say, while he does not have a set chore list, he does do things if I ask him to (pick up laundry, clean room, empty garbage, set table, etc.).

I know he needs a set allowance, but don't know how much to give him.

I know that this question will get a lot of different answers, but how much allowance do you give your teenager? Or how much did you get as a teenager?

Right now I am leaning towards $15-$20/week for him, but what is your opinion?

Thanks!

 

[laurafergie]

Back when my older ones were that age - their school lunches cost $1.85 a day and I gave them $20 for the week to cover lunches and allowance. It was their choice to either take lunches, so they would have the entire $20 for the week - or to use it for lunches and and have $10.75 for allowance for the week.

So yes, I think $20-25 is plenty. You could have special chores set up (like maybe cleaning the garage out) to earn more.

 

[allison443]

I think the main thing would be, what do you expect the allowance to cover?

My dd is almost 14, she is a freshman in hs. For her weekly expenses, I would include buying school lunch twice a week (she brings lunch the other days), amd maybe $20 for the weekend. (example, a movie and going to the diner afterward). Some weekends she won't spend $20, so then she has extra money for the following week, when they might go shopping at the mall, and she can use it to buy clothes or makeup.

She is also swamped with homework and afterschool sports practices. We also don't tie allowance to chores. Chores are just a responsibility of living here. That works for us but I know other things work for other families.

 

[rszdtrvl]

His allowance will be to cover things like :

Eating at a restaurant while at the YMCA
School trip spending money
Basic "want" things (video games, books (non-educational), etc.)
Extra guitar picks, and other guitar accessories
CD's

I am thinking paying him every Friday, that way if he does have trips or goes to the Y, he will have the money. Trips are always on Saturday, and he goes to the YMCA on the weekends also (normally once a week, unless we have weekend plans).

 

[wvjules]

My DD gets $20 a week. I pack her lunch every day so her money is to do with as she wishes. I do give her extra money if she is going somewhere occasionally. For instance a couple of weeks ago she went to OC with her BFF so I gave her an extra $100 for food and fun and souvenirs.

I do not expect her to use her allowance to purchase things that I would have purchased for her if she didn't have an allowance (such as school lunches, school field trips, etc).

 

[Bowen9475]

We have three kids. They all have specific chores they are responsible for. Beginning this past summer we started giving then an allowance equal to the grade they are in in school. Our oldest just turned 14, is in 8th grade and gets $8 per week. My husband got this idea from Kiplinger's magazine website. We pay for things like school lunch when they choose to buy it and for any field trips. Their allowance is theirs to do with as they wish.

 

[mom2faith]

We use the 50 cents per year of age method (as advised by Gail VazOxlay of Till Debt Do You Part). So 14 years old would get $7.00 a week. (Similar to the $1 per grade as PP)

 

[rszdtrvl]

My DD gets $20 a week. I pack her lunch every day so her money is to do with as she wishes. I do give her extra money if she is going somewhere occasionally. For instance a couple of weeks ago she went to OC with her BFF so I gave her an extra $100 for food and fun and souvenirs.

I do not expect her to use her allowance to purchase things that I would have purchased for her if she didn't have an allowance (such as school lunches, school field trips, etc).

This is what I am leaning towards. I pay for field trips and a small spending amount, he will need to use his money if he wants more.

Right now, we give him about $6 or so every time he goes to the YMCA, so with that averaging 1x/week, plus the $1/year of age, he is looking at about $20/week

I am going to discuss this further in detail with DH, but I am leaning towards that amount.

Thanks for the imput all!!

 

[bookgirl]

My son needs to start getting a set allowance amount per week.

However, I am at a loss on how much to give him.

He is 13, will be 14 in December.

He is very busy. He is very social, and loves to go on trips with school groups and to the YMCA on the weekend.

We do not have any set chore list. Right now, he is trying to catch up on school work. School is very tough for him right now - just starting 8th grade - and at the moment his grades are more important to me than him doing chores. He missed one day last week due to being sick and he is still trying to catch up. He has a ton of homework each night, plus guitar lessons once a week.

Needless to say, while he does not have a set chore list, he does do things if I ask him to (pick up laundry, clean room, empty garbage, set table, etc.).

I know he needs a set allowance, but don't know how much to give him.

I know that this question will get a lot of different answers, but how much allowance do you give your teenager? Or how much did you get as a teenager?

Right now I am leaning towards $15-$20/week for him, but what is your opinion?

Thanks!

My vote would be for $20. That's enough for a weekend outing with friends and maybe a little extra to store away for something big. I would tell him that if he gets an allowance that he is responsible for his own things. Like if he gets a hankering for a coke while you're shopping it's up to him to have a couple dollars on him to buy it. Now if you are buying everyone something that's a pass, but he will have his own money and you are not an atm anymore.

 

[rszdtrvl]

DH is in agreement with the $20/week amount.

Like I told him, that is like the typical $6 we give him for his weekend, plus $1/year of age.

DS was shocked, and very excited. I did let him know that it will be a rare occasion when DH and I just up and buy him something as soon as the allowance thing kicks in.

 

[aprilgail2]

My 10 year old gets 10.00 a week--- 1.00 per year of age. She can do what she wants with it- its not tied to chores etc...those you do because you are part of the family, not to get paid! She saves most of it- she is a little pack rat. She makes monthly bank deposits but she also keeps a stash in her headboard of her bed for spending money. If she wants to go to the movies with friends and I am not home or don't have money on me she will just use her own- she also uses it to buy ice cream for her and grandma if she wants to from the truck.
She saves and buys all her own christmas gifts for the family and her friends- we just had a yard sale and she made 100.00 from selling her stuff and is savingt hat for Christmas spending money!

 

[SaraJayne]

My son needs to start getting a set allowance amount per week.

However, I am at a loss on how much to give him.

He is 13, will be 14 in December.

He is very busy. He is very social, and loves to go on trips with school groups and to the YMCA on the weekend.

We do not have any set chore list. Right now, he is trying to catch up on school work. School is very tough for him right now - just starting 8th grade - and at the moment his grades are more important to me than him doing chores. He missed one day last week due to being sick and he is still trying to catch up. He has a ton of homework each night, plus guitar lessons once a week.

Needless to say, while he does not have a set chore list, he does do things if I ask him to (pick up laundry, clean room, empty garbage, set table, etc.).

I know he needs a set allowance, but don't know how much to give him.

I know that this question will get a lot of different answers, but how much allowance do you give your teenager? Or how much did you get as a teenager?

Right now I am leaning towards $15-$20/week for him, but what is your opinion?

Thanks!

My son is the same age as yours (8th grade and will be 14 in Jan) and he gets half his age in allowance. So right now, $6.50 a week...though we typically round up to $7.

That money is his "fun" money. If he wants to golf, go bowling, go to the football game, buy iTunes, etc, it comes out of that money.

We pay for all of his lunch money.

He has specific chores he does that are not tied to allowance. However, they can do extra chores to earn extra money.

 

[2disneyboys]

Our boys get $1. per year of age per week and it changes on thier bday.

DH & I are responsible for the 'normal' costs of havng a child... seasonal clothing, lunchs, field trips, etc. and when there are family trips, we always will get them something. If they want more then what our budget to buy is they have to pay the difference with thier allowance. Allowance is not tied to chores, as that is just what being part of a family is (they don't pay me to wash thier clothes or cook dinner do they?) There are just certain responsibilities that are expected of them.

They can spend/save thier allowance how they want to, however, they do have to give 10% to something... a charity, church, something. sometimes they give money to church, other times, they use the money to buy canned food for the local food shelter etc. it varies, and I leave it up to them. They also have to put at least 10% into thier savings account. The other 80% is theirs to do with as they wish.

If there is something in particular that is considered an "extra" that they want, or want to do, then there are ALWAYS odd jobs either DH & I or someone in our family will pay them a reasonable wage to do. my oldest (10) loves to earn extra money by helping our neighbor (an elderly widow) work in her yard. He may only get $5 for an afternoon of work, but he loves "earning" money as he tells me. Our youngest ds... well... he doesn't like to "work" so I'm hoping at some point something called motiviation kicks in!

It really does depend on what you expect the allowance to cover. My friends (twin sisters) growing up (back in the 80's) were each given $25 a week.. but that was for EVERYTHING.. school supplies, school clothes, school lunch, field trips, movies, everything.... mom & dad took care of the house expenses and bought christmas and birthday presents, but that was it. I on the other had didn't actually get an allowance but was given $ on a as needed basis (trips to the movies etc) Theres not really a wrong or right answer

 

[etail]

I think the dollar amount if fine but would introduce two other things...

For meals for an activity that we require (such as Friday night music school) we pay for the meal. But if our son wants to wander off on the weekends or go eat with friends on his own time it should be his own money. Unfortunately one of the lessons we expect him to learn is that he may not have as much money as some of his friends. But our house is always open to his friends to hang out at...

For us, the other part is what lessons did we want to teach our son about allowances. For us the chore list or non-school responsibility is an essential part of learning that one's labor is worth something as a reward. (School is treated differently as both the development of an intrinsic valuation on learning and the acknowledgment of legal requirement...The reward will be getting away from evil controlling parents and not having to move back home ). Providing a portion of the allowance that is automatic with the option to earn more is another approach. If your son knows he wants something or has an event coming up, the chance to get "extra credit" by doing more chores also develops a good "life lesson".

 

[ragtopday]

This is a very interesting dicussion, and I'd love some input.

I have 2 daughters, ages 9 and 6. I've tried allowance at various times with my older daughter, and we started again about a month ago (younger DD still does not get a regular allowance). We came up with a list of chores she is expected to do (clean up the dogs' area outside, pack her backpack at night, take the trash out to the street on trash day once a week, fold and put away her own laundry, etc) in order to earn $5 a week. Most of these chores I have to remind (nag) her to do several times before she does them. Because we have 2 dogs and a small outside area, this particular chore really needs to be cleaned up every 24-36 hours or it gets disgusting, and a lot of times I end up doing it (I work from home) because even I can't stand it. How do you handle the balance between chores that should be done because everyone in the family pitches in, and the nagging? How do those of you who don't tie allowance to chores handle it when your child doesn't do their assigned chores?

Hope my question made sense !

 

[JamesMom]

This is a very interesting dicussion, and I'd love some input.

I have 2 daughters, ages 9 and 6. I've tried allowance at various times with my older daughter, and we started again about a month ago (younger DD still does not get a regular allowance). We came up with a list of chores she is expected to do (clean up the dogs' area outside, pack her backpack at night, take the trash out to the street on trash day once a week, fold and put away her own laundry, etc) in order to earn $5 a week. Most of these chores I have to remind (nag) her to do several times before she does them. Because we have 2 dogs and a small outside area, this particular chore really needs to be cleaned up every 24-36 hours or it gets disgusting, and a lot of times I end up doing it (I work from home) because even I can't stand it. How do you handle the balance between chores that should be done because everyone in the family pitches in, and the nagging? How do those of you who don't tie allowance to chores handle it when your child doesn't do their assigned chores?

Hope my question made sense !

This is a little off topic, but I'll respond to your questions. I have a DS7 2nd grader who gets $5 a week allowance. The allowance is tied to school or schoolwork. Our philosophy is that school is his 'job' and we don't reward grades - we reward effort. He will have $5 deposited into his bank account if
- completes all homework on time and neatly done
- wakes up with minimal fuss and makes it to the bus on time
- receives no negative behavior chart comments for the week.
If it is summer, then he needs to complete reading and worksheet assignments I provide. Breaks during the school & camp during the summer is 'off-time' and allowance is given as long as behavior is good.

In terms of chores around the house, if he choses to not do the chores then things stop until they are done. Clean room till vacuum ready today - if not done, then no TV, computer time, playdates, etc. until it is. Us parents will wait days, if necessary (and he tried that...once). I usually point out how nice it is he has snacks in the fridge, clean clothes in his closet and gas in the car to get him where he wants to go -- thanks to a Mom who does chores without gripes and a Dad who gets up and goes to work everyday, even during the summer. How fun would life be if Mom & Dad decided to not do those chores anymore?

Good luck.

 

[StitchBuddy]

I guess I am the odd man out on this one. My daughter babysits, and pet sits for people and I expect her to save about 40% of it. The rest she can do with as she pleases, but no allowance. We pay for her select sports and I feel like that is a lot of money. Of course if she goes out to eat or something I will give her a little money. But, she rarely has time for that with three hour practices four days a week, school sports, school plays, and Pre-AP classes. Heck, she barely has time to sleep. But, if I was going to give her an allowance it would be $13 a week, one dollar per year of her age.

 

[2disneyboys]

This is a little off topic, but I'll respond to your questions. I have a DS7 2nd grader who gets $5 a week allowance. The allowance is tied to school or schoolwork. Our philosophy is that school is his 'job' and we don't reward grades - we reward effort. He will have $5 deposited into his bank account if
- completes all homework on time and neatly done
- wakes up with minimal fuss and makes it to the bus on time
- receives no negative behavior chart comments for the week.
If it is summer, then he needs to complete reading and worksheet assignments I provide. Breaks during the school & camp during the summer is 'off-time' and allowance is given as long as behavior is good.

In terms of chores around the house, if he choses to not do the chores then things stop until they are done. Clean room till vacuum ready today - if not done, then no TV, computer time, playdates, etc. until it is. Us parents will wait days, if necessary (and he tried that...once). I usually point out how nice it is he has snacks in the fridge, clean clothes in his closet and gas in the car to get him where he wants to go -- thanks to a Mom who does chores without gripes and a Dad who gets up and goes to work everyday, even during the summer. How fun would life be if Mom & Dad decided to not do those chores anymore?

Good luck.

THIS! It's literally what I was getting ready to write. not doing chores, or doing chores with a bad attitude or having to be nagged to do chores results in loss of privilages... computer, ds, tv, movies, fun trips to Busch Gardens/Water Country, etc. And all we had to do was actually enforce this (like skip going to Water Country for the day or leaving him home with someone else once or twice) and it's amazing how much quieter and quicker those chores get done.. This system works for our family.. The key is to be consistant. you can't say if I have to nag you to take out the trash your are going to lose (whatever) and then not do it (EVEN if its not convenient for you for the child to lose (whatever)

Sort of like in grown up life. You have job with responsibilities. If you don't do the job, you lose it. Even if you do the job well, and yes, that means you get to keep the job, you STILL have things you have to do at home, its part of living in a home. We chose for Education to be our kids jobs... Chores are just part of living in the home

 

[allison443]

never mind, I misread something!

 

[NHdisneylover]

OP--it sounds like you have come up with something that will work well for you. We go with a Euro per year of age (so they are at 11 and 13 now) per week. Lunch is included at school for all the kids and they pack a snack form home. If we are eating a meal out as a fmaily or ALL going out ofr ice cream, etc than we cover it, but if they just want to get an ice cream while we are out or think they are too hungry to wait until we get home for dinner (generally my DS who is picky and may not have eaten much of the lunch at school) then that is on their dime.Mostly they spend their money on doing things with friends or save it (DD saves most and ten spends about half that spoiling everyone at Christmas).

This is a very interesting dicussion, and I'd love some input.

I have 2 daughters, ages 9 and 6. I've tried allowance at various times with my older daughter, and we started again about a month ago (younger DD still does not get a regular allowance). We came up with a list of chores she is expected to do (clean up the dogs' area outside, pack her backpack at night, take the trash out to the street on trash day once a week, fold and put away her own laundry, etc) in order to earn $5 a week. Most of these chores I have to remind (nag) her to do several times before she does them. Because we have 2 dogs and a small outside area, this particular chore really needs to be cleaned up every 24-36 hours or it gets disgusting, and a lot of times I end up doing it (I work from home) because even I can't stand it. How do you handle the balance between chores that should be done because everyone in the family pitches in, and the nagging? How do those of you who don't tie allowance to chores handle it when your child doesn't do their assigned chores?

Hope my question made sense !

We do a couple of things. The basic allowance mine get is just their pocket money--no strings attached.
They can also earn extra by doing chores that they are not normally responsible for (like vacuuming out the car or cleaning out the fridge). There is a "time sheet" we printed out that they can grab and initial and date next to any extras they did and then turn in to us at the end of the month. Just before a trip they might do a lot of extras but often that never even gets touched. You could create something likes this even for routine chores. Make up a sheet listing each item for each day for a week. Hand it to your DD with instructions that SHE is responsible for completing the chores in the times they are to be done and initialing it (and maybe bringing to you to sign off on?). Spell out the consequences for each item not done on time (allowance docked, loss of TV, whatever) and then do not mention chores at all except on Friday night when the sheet is due in (or whenever you make it due). It will be hard not to say anything when you see neglected chores (and you can clean out the dog's tings once her time is up for that so the dog does not suffer--but it won't get signed off then) but she will only learn to do things without nagging if you do not nag and then she still has the consequences there in the end.