Advice with neighbor dispute...

[kimmyann]

We have lived in our house for almost three years now & have never had any problems with anyone. We are quiet and mostly keep to ourselves, but we rent so I can't modify anything. We are having an issue with our neighbor & they will just not stop. At this point I don't know what to do, but keep ignoring them, but it is still stressful & inconvenient. We have a single driveway, the house has an converted garage that sticks out somewhat so my mini van is parked in the driveway, my DH's company truck is in the street directly in front of the house & my DD's car is parked in the street on the right side of the driveway, well it was. She has been parking there for a year now & then a few weeks ago the people across the street, diagnally from us on a corner lot, started parking one of their vehicles there. It is their grown daughter & as soon as my DD would leave she would park there. Well, after two weeks of this my DD took sidewalk chalk one day & drew it around her car (my DD's car) & wrote my parking spot. Immature? Yes. As soon as we got home from work we washed it off the street. Ever since then it has gotten worse. The other neighbors park one of their cars in the street, my DH pulls his truck up so they are not directly across from each other, but now with them taking my DD's spot she has to pull up behind my DH's truck & I can't even back out without using the other neighbors driveway. We don't even have anywhere to put our trash cans now.

I know this is long, but I don't know how to handle this. It's like constant harrassing & I'm not good with confrontation. My DH tried to talk to the guy about it, since it started out of nowhere after my DD had been parking there for a year & they have a double driveway & live on a corner lot, but the guy got really nasty & acted like he wanted to fight so nothing was resolved besides it being worse. The guy said it was because of what my DD did, we apoligized for that & it actually started before she did that. He even moved his big utility truck there now. So for now I have my DD parking in the grass beside my van (the driveway is short, so there really isn't room for two vehicles). I really don't know what else to do but keep ignoring them & hopefully they will get tired of it. I really feel uncomfortable at this point, I guess I just don't understand the vindictivness behind it. They are just being mean. Any advice?

 

[RachaelA]

Well its street parking which means its public and anyone can park there. It doesn't make a difference how long your daughter has been parking there. As soon as the spot is empty, anyone can take it.

Would it be nice if they parked in their driveway since they have enough space? Of course it would, but they don't have to park there.

I think you are just going to have to deal with it. Sorry.

 

[mjkacmom]

Well, it's public property, so they have a right to park there. Are they being nice about it? No, but I think a lot depends on how your DH approached them. If he said something along the line of "hey, I know my dd has no right to expect that space to be kept for her, but I'd really appreciate it if you could park anywhere else" vs. "hey, that's dd's space, so please stop parking there," then they are being inconsiderate, but I don't think they're going to change.

 

[TheIncredibles!]

You don't own the road, if parking is allowed then anybody for any reason can park on the road. Tell your daughter to park in any spot that is available and be done with it.

 

[Bonnie151]

I feel for you, honestly I do. We only have one car but all of the other neighbours have at least 3 (and one has SIX!!) and people park all over the place in our cul-de-sac. We frequently struggle to just get in & out of our drive. However, unfortunately as other have pointed out, it's a public area and there's really nothing you can do about it. Yes, it's inconsiderate, but not illegal.

 

[LuvLDM]

You don't own the road, if parking is allowed then anybody for any reason can park on the road. Tell your daughter to park in any spot that is available and be done with it.

Agreed.
Frankly it was your Dd who created the tension by chalking out a parking spot that really isn't hers to begin with.

 

[hereyago]

Honestly, not much you can do, since it's a public street.


but you mentioned utility truck? Is it really big? In my city, there cannot be certain types of vehicles parked in residential areas unless something is being worked on: such as dump trucks, trucks for tree trimming with the bucket on the top,etc. So perhaps there is an ordinance about his utility truck.

 

[kimmyann]

I know I don't own the road, I never said I did. I am also totally aware that it is a public street. I guess I just am not good with dealing with people who act like jerks, that's the reason they are doing this & trying to talk to them about it just made it worse. We are dealing with it, that's why she is now in the grass. It's just unfortunate, I wouldn't do that to someone, but I am aware that some people just don't care. Oh well.

 

[EMom]

Have your DH park his truck right in front of their house. I'm sure they'll love that view. If that spot is taken, park on the side of their house, Basically, turn the tables and park in the spots they would see as "theirs" if they had any manners at all. Have DD do the same. Or have your DH park in such a way that no one has enough room in front or back of him to park a car and then when DD comes home, he can move it enough for her to get in.

I don't care what the law allows, people who do this are rude. Park in front/beside your own freaking house if there's room or in your own driveway....But to leave those spots open and go out of your way to park in front of someone else's house is rude.

 

[EMom]

I know I don't own the road, I never said I did. I am also totally aware that it is a public street. I guess I just am not good with dealing with people who act like jerks, that's the reason they are doing this & trying to talk to them about it just made it worse. We are dealing with it, that's why she is now in the grass. It's just unfortunate, I wouldn't do that to someone, but I am aware that some people just don't care. Oh well.

As I said, you may have to. Park in what they would perceive as "their " space and let them see how fun that is. Be sure to use your ugliest POS vehicle when you do it.

 

[tvguy]

I have 5 cars. My next door neighbor has 5, and a 5th wheel travel trailer that he has in front of his house once in a while.
Garbage day was yesterday, and that means time to juggle cars.
Never been an issue here, just a fact of life if you have more cars than you have off street parking.
Is there a reason your daughter HAS to park in front of your house, and not a house or two down?
No offense, but why is this even an issue?

 

[BCDisneyFanatic]

Have your DH park his truck right in front of their house. I'm sure they'll love that view. If that spot is taken, park on the side of their house, Basically, turn the tables and park in the spots they would see as "theirs" if they had any manners at all. Have DD do the same. Or have your DH park in such a way that no one has enough room in front or back of him to park a car and then when DD comes home, he can move it enough for her to get in.

I don't care what the law allows, people who do this are rude. Park in front/beside your own freaking house if there's room or in your own driveway....But to leave those spots open and go out of your way to park in front of someone else's house is rude.

I know, I know...we should all be bigger people and let these things go, but sometimes it just feels so good to get some of that vindictiveness out.

 

[disykat]

I agree with EMom that you have to park in front of their house. I don't think you have to do it out of spite, clearly you'd like to park where it is more convenient. You just have no choice since the spot in front of your house is taken.

I don't really understand why you are parking in the grass when there is still street parking (in front of their house) available?

 

[Hannathy]

Is there only parking on one side of the street? couldn't she park across the street?

I also think since she created the problem at 19 she should have to park down the street and walk, 19 is a good age to learn to think before you act immature. (and I have a DD 19 ) I would have more sympathy until you said she was 19, if she had been 16. If she does stuff like tis when she has an apartment she could be in for some real problems

How much room does your DH's truck take up? if it is more than your front yard width that you can't get 2 vehicles in in the space of your front yard I don't blame the folks for being annoyed, if she was in front of their house.

 

[RachaelA]

Have your DH park his truck right in front of their house. I'm sure they'll love that view. If that spot is taken, park on the side of their house, Basically, turn the tables and park in the spots they would see as "theirs" if they had any manners at all. Have DD do the same. Or have your DH park in such a way that no one has enough room in front or back of him to park a car and then when DD comes home, he can move it enough for her to get in.

I don't care what the law allows, people who do this are rude. Park in front/beside your own freaking house if there's room or in your own driveway....But to leave those spots open and go out of your way to park in front of someone else's house is rude.

Well it was just as rude for the OP's daughter to chalk in a spot with a lawn chair and write "my spot" on it. The neighbors didn't do anything wrong in the first place. They parked on a public street.

 

[jlewisinsyr]

I really think the issue starts with you DD chalking the road. Yes, it was immature and immaturity causes a lot of issues and I think your DD has learned a good lesson. If I were in your situation, I would probably try to make amends (not addressing the situation) by bringing a bottle of wine or something to them (honey versus vinegar) - in your case, you daughter should do this. I would then inconvenience myself and not try to park in the contested area until the storm passes.

You might want to check your local government to ensure you are allowed to park your car on your grass, some communities, this is not allowed.

 

[kimmyann]

Have your DH park his truck right in front of their house. I'm sure they'll love that view. If that spot is taken, park on the side of their house, Basically, turn the tables and park in the spots they would see as "theirs" if they had any manners at all. Have DD do the same. Or have your DH park in such a way that no one has enough room in front or back of him to park a car and then when DD comes home, he can move it enough for her to get in.

I don't care what the law allows, people who do this are rude. Park in front/beside your own freaking house if there's room or in your own driveway....But to leave those spots open and go out of your way to park in front of someone else's house is rude.

Oh, my DH wants to do this so bad, but he won't because I asked him not to. It would then be just a viscious cycle.

I really think the issue starts with you DD chalking the road. Yes, it was immature and immaturity causes a lot of issues and I think your DD has learned a good lesson. If I were in your situation, I would probably try to make amends (not addressing the situation) by bringing a bottle of wine or something to them (honey versus vinegar) - in your case, you daughter should do this. I would then inconvenience myself and not try to park in the contested area until the storm passes.

You might want to check your local government to ensure you are allowed to park your car on your grass, some communities, this is not allowed.

It actually started before my DD did this, what she did just made it worse. It was there for about an hour before we rinsed it off, but the damage was already done. I do like your idea for a last effort on our part to make amends (since apologizing didn't help). Atleast at that point I won't feel so bad when I do start parking in front of their house. Other than that I will just keep trying to ignore them.

 

[RachaelA]

It actually started before my DD did this, what she did just made it worse. It was there for about an hour before we rinsed it off, but the damage was already done. I do like your idea for a last effort on our part to make amends (since apologizing didn't help). Atleast at that point I won't feel so bad when I do start parking in front of their house. Other than that I will just keep trying to ignore them.

How did it start before this? All they did was park on a public street after she left. What is rude about that?

 

[TheIncredibles!]

I know I don't own the road, I never said I did. I am also totally aware that it is a public street. I guess I just am not good with dealing with people who act like jerks, that's the reason they are doing this & trying to talk to them about it just made it worse. We are dealing with it, that's why she is now in the grass. It's just unfortunate, I wouldn't do that to someone, but I am aware that some people just don't care. Oh well.

Your daughter was the first one that was a jerk here. All she needs to do is park in any other available spot.

 

[shortbun]

Your daughter should park her car down the street. She caused a huge rift with the neighbors over a parking issue that possibly could have been settled in a peaceful manner. It should be your DD who apologizes, not 'we' as in your husband or you. If they see how young and dumb(sorry but it could work FOR her) she is, maybe they will find some way to get calm about it. She should apologize without any expectations of getting 'her' space back. She should get zen about parking far away and walking a bit.
We used to live in a heavily parked area. Sometimes we had to park around the corner or on another street to have a place to park because our neighbors were parked in front of our house. We never had an argument over parking in 22 years. It's not worth it.