Advice on what to say to parents of newborn w/ Down's Syndrome

[mrsmom]

I would send a congrats card, they need support and need to know that no matter what defect a baby has they are like any other baby and are loved the same. My third dd was born with what is called Pierre robin sequence, which is a cleft palete and a bottom jaw way back which causes alot of problems breathing. she went through a tough tiime but it was tougher for me seeing people afraid to hold her , and they wouldn't say anything to me because they didn't know what to say. a card means alot.
I made a story on www.birthstories.com Look for storeies and
go to page 2 and under ( Not all babies are perfect) click this is the one i wrote after she was a year old or so
Mrsmom

 

[crazymomof4]

mrsmom~
I really want to read your birth story...but I can't seem to find it.
The categories I find when I use your link are: First Baby, Second Or More and First After a Loss. Is it under one of these or somewhere else?

 

[torismom]

I havent read all of the replies but will add my 2cents worth in.

A good friend of mine had a baby girl and had no idea of problmes. After she delivered Natalie she was told she was born with spinibifidia and club feet. It was heartbreaking and a shcok but she still loved the baby as anyone would.

The one thing she said to me that I will always remember is:Thank you for congratulating me and being excited about Natalie's birth. Nobody else is.

Everyone either pretended everything was fine or tottally ignored the fact she just gave birth. The parents need support and need everyone to treat the baby just as they would a baby without down syndrome.


Prayers for your friends and their baby.

 

[6_Time_Momma]

but if you don't understand Downs, ask. I think my friend would much prefer that someone ask her to explain Downs than to make snap judgements about her son and his abilities based on preconceived notions.

This is another very good point. Believe me, I love to let people know what DS is about and what it isn't.

As to the heart surgery, Garrett was 3 months old when he had his and, yes, they will need awesome support during that time. So a nice get well card and maybe small stuffed animal during that time would be nice as well.

 

[TEENEE]

My dd was born with a birthdefect that could have resulted in many problems. One of my first thoughts was that her defect didn't matter, I still loved her and was happy to have her in my life. My advice would be to do whatever you would do if this precious child was born without a defect. When she has surgery send a get well card. To some degree I was in a fog when my dd was born but one thing stands out. When Sam was two days old she had surgery. Sometime during the surgery I got a call at the hospital from a co-worker telling me that everyone was thinking of us and praying for us. I still get tears in my eyes when I think of that.

 

[m&m's mom]

I can second what everyone else has said- "Congratulations" are in order.
My 1st child was born at 24 weeks gestation, in other words 4 months early. It was my first child and I never heard "Congratulations". My Dr. had given me and my family very bad advice that my DD did not stand a chance to live or have a meaningful life. She is now a perfect 6 YO w/out ANY lingering issues. I cried all day the day she was born because my Dr. told me not to expect her to live and my family was following my lead by being sympathetic.
The family had a baby and it is a joyful occasion-I would treat it as such.

 

[cinmell]

I agree with a congratulations card.

 

[Denine]

I believe congratulations are in order! Also, a get well card when the baby has surgery.
The mom can look back on all those lovely cards in a few years.

 

[mrsmom]

It's under first baby and then click on premature babies. It under Not all babies are perfect. Why it's under first baby, i don't know since she was my third. I have four too, two girls and two boys!..
Mrsmom

 

[Bunchkin]

For sure a Congratulations card!!
There is so much to celebrate in the birth of a baby!!