Advice needed-Birthday presents

[Marymom]

My daughter just had a birthday last week and apparantly 2 grandparents forgot. They both sent my son checks for his birthday, 3 weeks ago. Would you give your daughter the money they would have given her? It would be 25.00. I don't think this is a statement/message to my daughter, as she is the sweetest of my bunch.

Thanks, Mary

 

[snarlingcoyote]

I would, but that's b/c in my family we cover for each other like that. I know my folks will pick up the tab for relations if I forget and then I can pay them back later. In return, I keep my eyes open at all times so they can get their grandbabies uber special things for cheap and have been known to keep some relations outfitted in clothes and will slip them $50 Walmart cards on regular occasions when I think they need food.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

No, I would not. We don't have a precendent set though about gifts. Some people give gifts and some do not or it was a mistake.

Now if your dd doesn't get anything next yr and your son does, I would reevalute the situation then. I would just point blank ask them about it.

Or you could say something to them now if you are close and you think that they would want to send your dd something.

But to give them money without asking the GP's first is something I could not do. It just does not feel right to me to do that.

Now if they had made arrangements with you ahead of time then that is different.

 

[Cinderella94]

I would, but that's b/c in my family we cover for each other like that. I know my folks will pick up the tab for relations if I forget and then I can pay them back later. In return, I keep my eyes open at all times so they can get their grandbabies uber special things for cheap and have been known to keep some relations outfitted in clothes and will slip them $50 Walmart cards on regular occasions when I think they need food.

That's how we do it too!

 

[Bluestars]

Maybe they just forgot. I would give your daughter the money since you don't think they did it on purpose.

 

[lovesmurfs]

I would probably ask them about it, not from a "you didn't send anything" standpoint, but from a "just curious" standpoint. It really hurts when one sibling gets something and the other doesn't, and the hurt one KNOWS when Mom does it instead of Grandma.

 

[Marymom]

Thanks everyone for your responses. Well, Grandpa called tonight with apologies to my daughter. If it happens again in the future, I think I will let it play itself out. These were in-laws, so I wasn't comfortable asking. If it had been my mom, I would have called and spotted her just like others had responded.

Mary

 

[stichy]

One set of my parents always forget my son's bday. And he's the oldest granchild. You'd think that they would be able to remember him. The only time they ever send a gift is if my sister makes a point to remind them of James' bday.