A grown man moving in with his parents is unhealthy for both the grown man and his parents.
I set aside special circumstances (unable to work due to disability, plugging a gap around a move, a divorce, a relocation, etc).
I understand your point, but it’s all relative today.
It’s also unhealthy to be unable to afford to live comfortably, to have a car that’s “found on road dead” and in the shop monthly, to not have some breathing room with bills, to have a credit score in the toilet, to not have some savings in the bank, and to not be able to buy healthy food at the supermarket, etc.
I moved out of my house at 18 and DH 23, and we made it work. That was in the early 80s. Times were different then. Regardless, it would’ve been beneficial long-term for us to save more by living at home first, but that wasn’t possible for me, so we got our own place. I wish things could’ve been different for us, but they weren’t. So BTDT.
Where we live, apartments are now crazy expensive, like $2000-3000/month.
And the average home price where we live is $800,000+
We’re not interested in moving somewhere else, so we have to make it work.
We want our kids to be able to BUY something of their own, not pad someone else’s pockets and never be able to save enough to get their own places, as prices are rising.
My DD is a college grad, works FT, is almost halfway through her master’s, has a good chunk of change put aside for a down payment for her own place, and has been stocking up on things for her own home, as well.
DS is also a college grad, working FT, had to take an additional course this year for his job of choice, and is waiting to take the licensing exam for that. Once done, he’ll be in the job he wants soon afterward.
He’ll also be saving for something to buy.
We feel it would be dumb for them to be paying rent, at those costs, when they can live comfortably with us where we live. They each pay room and board, as well as their bills, drive decent cars, and help out around the house. Both also helped care for my elderly mother for many years, through her passing, when she lived with us, too. I can never repay them for that, but, to us, this is what families do. I don’t think they’re missing out on much, they have all the comforts of home and their boyfriend/girlfriend are welcome to stay over. We’re all adults. We are used to having an inter-generational home and it works for us. I do think that more people will be doing that as costs continue to skyrocket everywhere.