Abusive Disney Guests...When To Interfere?

[ilovefh]

I never interfere but having worked at WDW have experienced my fair share of disgruntled guests! My favorite though....

I was inly witness to this situation, my co-worker was the unfortunate one to handle it (along with our manager and security).

A guest and her party of 10 showed up 45 mins after their PS. Normally it would not have been a big deal but we had stopped seating for the night 30 mins earlier (She showed up at 7:30 for a 6:45 PS when we closed at 7). There was absoluetly no way we could seat them and serve them dinner. The kitchen staff had already broken down the kitchen and the only one left dealing with food was the dessert station as all dinners had been served. At first she started out with the "oh how can you do this to my starving kids" We offered her a seating at LTT, any of the monorail restaurants but she wanted none of it. (And these were imediate seatings that the managers at these restaurants would hold until she got there) She then went into a tirade cussing up a storm about "look kids disney doesn't give a **** about us", and things of that nature directly to her children and the children in her party. Then she started throwing things! The manager had been very calm until then but at that point he had to call security and she was removed!

I honestly feel bad for these people that they cannot be happy in WDW. The only time I have ever gotten mad in Disney was when a front desk cm accidentally erased my room rate and said she put it back in correctly. When I went to check out I noticed she had charged me the holiday rate and not the value rate (it was a jan 1 check in) and cro and guest services tried to convince me that was the correct rate. It all got worked out in the end though!

I did once say something to someone though. The woman was cussing about a situation that no one could help. I let her know that I felt cussing was not appropriate in WDW!

 

[Pongo69]

Deafmeric I can understand your wife being upset with what happend, but as I said before approaching someone like that no matter what color, age or sex it can be very dangerous. What that man did was wrong, and what your wife did was just as wrong. She should have called mall police or regular police.

 

[kaseyC]

You do not know how people will react if you confront them or even loud talk them these days.
A few years ago my a friend of my gave "the bird" to a car that cut her off in a mall parking lot. The car turned around and followed her to where she parked. The man was yelling at her and trying to get her to get out of the car. She held up her cell phone to let him know she was calling the police and he left. She knew she was wrong to give him the "finger" but she did not expect him to come after her.
It just goes to show you do not know how someone will react.

 

[Eeyore1954]

Originally posted by kaseyC
You do not know how people will react if you confront them or even loud talk them these days.
A few years ago my a friend of my gave "the bird" to a car that cut her off in a mall parking lot. The car turned around and followed her to where she parked. The man was yelling at her and trying to get her to get out of the car. She held up her cell phone to let him know she was calling the police and he left. She knew she was wrong to give him the "finger" but she did not expect him to come after her.
It just goes to show you do not know how someone will react.

ITA! While it may seem satisfying at the moment, you don't know what that other person's temprement is. You may find yourself being the straw that broke the camel's back.

We've got road rage, air rage, now Disney rage! (And at what is supposed to be the Happiest Place on Earth, too.)

 

[RickinNYC]

I'm afraid that I'm one of those folks who will always stick up for myself, my loved ones and my friends. To add to that, if I see a bully verbally haranguing anyone who is clearly not capable of holding their own, I step in. Bullies, whether in the real world, or in WDW, are absolutely, without merit, the single most disgusting group of worthless individuals I have ever had the misfortune to come across.

I do NOT care if you've had a bad day, or if you've been traveling for 24 hours, of if you feel sick, or if you didn't sleep well, or if you've been on your feet all day, or if you haven't eaten, of if you're kids/family/husband/wife, etc... has been driving you crazy. There is absolutely NO reason under the sun for taking your problems out on anyone else. If you can't deal with any situation with maturity, sensibility and fairness, go home and stay there. I do NOT want to see you, and rest assured, no one else does either. If, however, you feel the need to work out your frustrations on someone, God help you if I'm in the vicinity.

I've often seen Cast Members driven to tears from someone else's rudeness. I've had a total stranger physically push my partner aside in their rush to get somewhere. I've been around when someone called my Mom a name. I've been the focus of a stranger's rage as well. And I won't sit back and let them do so. If I did, then they'd walk away thinking they "won" when in fact, they need someone to point out the error of their ways.

In my opinion, looking away and ignoring that kind of behavior only supports the idiot. If they consistently get away with what they're doing as a result of blind eyes and deaf ears, they'll never stop. You know that as well as I do.

In WDW, Cast Members are clearly not allowed to stick up for themselves, thus they put up with whatever behavior guests feel they deserve. They can only smile and offer assistance. Well folks, the saying "The customer is always right" is the biggest bunch of claptrap.

On our last visit to WDW, my partner and I were in line at the Backlot, waiting our turn to place an order. The woman in front of us immediately started screaming (not speaking loudly, not being gruff). She was screaming as loud as can be when the poor Cast Member had taken her order incorrectly and gave her a large soda as opposed to a large frozen drink of some sort. Rather than trying to politely point out the error, she ranted and raved, calling the Cast Member an idiot, stupid, and more. Then she demanded to get her family's entire lunch order for free "due to the stupidity" of the situation.

The Cast Member? She simply offered to make the exchange and not charge for the difference. Apparently that wasn't good enough because the witch screamed louder and louder. Guests simply watched. The clincher was when the Cast Member started to visibly shake and tears came to her eyes. Think that stopped the woman? NOPE! She kept at it.

I couldn't just stand by and watch this. Could you? It was horrible. I immediately stated very loud and VERY clear, "Lady, you're only embarrassing yourself. Get a little dignity and self respect." And yes, I yelled it as loud as she was screaming at the Cast Member. Out of sheer and total embarrassment, the witch grabbed her lunch and stormed off.

When the same Cast Member took my order at that point, I simply told her what we'd like, smiled and said, "You're doing a great job. Don't let that woman spoil your day."

The smile she gave me was 1000 watts. I knew that I had done the right thing. And I'd do it again if given the chance. And I'll continue to do so.

 

[MHopkins2]

Good for you, Rick!!!

 

[Eeyore1954]

Originally posted by RickinNYC
I couldn't just stand by and watch this. Could you?

I could and have. I am at Disney for a vacation, not to play etiquette police for those who lose their cool and want to vent their frustrations. If someone is acting like a jerk to a CM, it's the CM's responsibility to correct the situation, attempt to satisfy the guest (which I realize is sometimes impossible and impractical), or turn the situation over to their immediate superior to resolve.

If I observed this behavior, I don't speak to or about the "jerk" in their presence or within their earshot. Like someone said earlier, you never know what might happen and I'd just as soon not have to spend part of my vacation dealing with Disney security or outside police or tending a black eye, broken nose, swollen lip, etc.

What I do try to do is encourage the CM with some kind remarks, a "thanks for making this a magical day for me" kind of thing. On one especially bad experience, I took a pin from my lanyard (it was Mickey's hand with a thumbs up on a red background), handed it to the CM and told them I thought Walt would have approved of the way they handled themselves and the rude guest. Thus I was giving them a big "Thumbs up" in Walt's name. From their reaction, I think it at least made their day.

BTW, I usually keep a couple of spare "thumbs up" pins to hand out to CMs who I think have done an exceptional job. You never know when a kind word might make a "magical moment" for a CM. Heaven knows, with what they have to put up with they could use a magical moment now and then!

 

[GAIL HAYDEN]

Originally posted by Eeyore1954
I could and have. I am at Disney for a vacation, not to play etiquette police for those who lose their cool and want to vent their frustrations. If someone is acting like a jerk to a CM, it's the CM's responsibility to correct the situation, attempt to satisfy the guest (which I realize is sometimes impossible and impractical), or turn the situation over to their immediate superior to resolve.

If I observed this behavior, I don't speak to or about the "jerk" in their presence or within their earshot. Like someone said earlier, you never know what might happen and I'd just as soon not have to spend part of my vacation dealing with Disney security or outside police or tending a black eye, broken nose, swollen lip, etc.

What I do try to do is encourage the CM with some kind remarks, a "thanks for making this a magical day for me" kind of thing. On one especially bad experience, I took a pin from my lanyard (it was Mickey's hand with a thumbs up on a red background), handed it to the CM and told them I thought Walt would have approved of the way they handled themselves and the rude guest.

When someone is verbally attacking someone that cannot defend themselves because of the position they are in, then I would step in, rapidly. NO ONE has any right to treat another human being like a piece of crap and that is what some of these people do (and I strongly suspect it is because they cannot do anything about it). The premise that the "customer is always right" may have worked back when people treated others as they would like to be treated, but, that is LONG gone. There is simply no excuse for treating a CM badly, or anyone else for that matter.

 

[RUDisney]

Rick... appropriate action at appropriate moment.

It's too bad there was no manager around to take the ladies' lunch away and tell her to go hungry. "No Soup For You!" kind of thing.

 

[Eeyore1954]

Originally posted by GAIL HAYDEN
When someone is verbally attacking someone that cannot defend themselves because of the position they are in, then I would step in, rapidly. NO ONE has any right to treat another human being like a piece of crap and that is what some of these people do (and I strongly suspect it is because they cannot do anything about it). The premise that the "customer is always right" may have worked back when people treated others as they would like to be treated, but, that is LONG gone. There is simply no excuse for treating a CM badly, or anyone else for that matter.

I don't know of anyone in any position that cannot defend themselves, if that defense is nothing more than involving one's immediate superior in the situation.

I agree that there is no excuse for treating a CM badly, however, I do not believe it's my responsibility as a guest to come to the employee's defense. Some people need to learn how to separate themselves from the situation and know when to call in the reinforcements (another CM or their manager). I don't work for Disney security and I'm certainly not going to volunteer to become some CM's temporary manager.

 

[MHopkins2]

I agree that there is no excuse for treating a CM badly, however, I do not believe it's my responsibility as a guest to come to the employee's defense.

I agree with you there - it's not your *responsibility* to do so, and you're not "wrong" for MYOB. But that doesn't mean it's "wrong" to step in either, and IMO doing so in a fair and rational manner like Rick did (vs. screaming four letter words at the moron, as I would have been tempted to do) is admirable.

 

[mudnuri]

This is a tough situation...

You NEVER know what the person is capable of once you confront them, the person who flipped off another driver and then was followed is a good example. Road rage has lead to people being shot....could this happen in Disney- I guess yes it could.

I will, and have spoken to people who are making complete fools of themselves with swearing etc.. in the company of my children. I do not just say it loudly, I look directly at them, and remind them that children are around..

A CM has the authority to do whatever they want/can. They can ALWAYS get a manager, who is more formally trained to deal with idiots



Brandy

 

[Eeyore1954]

Originally posted by MHopkins2
I agree with you there - it's not your *responsibility* to do so, and you're not "wrong" for MYOB. But that doesn't mean it's "wrong" to step in either, and IMO doing so in a fair and rational manner like Rick did (vs. screaming four letter words at the moron, as I would have been tempted to do) is admirable.

I don't believe I said it was wrong to step in. But the OP asked "when do you interfere" and my reply was never. I don't believe either method is wrong or right. Whatever works for you...

I just hope your reflexes are better/faster than mine!

 

[inaminute]

To sit back and say, "sorry, not my problem" is giving permission for the bad behavior to continue.

Bullying is not acceptable by anyone at any time or place--no matter how old they are. I applaud those who stand up and say "no more" to a person bullying someone else.

 

[MHopkins2]

Originally posted by Eeyore1954
I just hope your reflexes are better/faster than mine!

No, probably not. But then, I rarely step in myself, due to my tendency to flip out. (Which I'm sure will come as a huge shock to DB posters, who are used to seeing my kind and gentle nature.) ( )

 

[katerkat]

I will rarely interfere, mainly because I have a temper and I would end up screaming at the idiot who was screaming at the CM. If it was someone taking MY spot for a parade, I'd say something, but not push the issue too far. (I don't normally watch the parades because of too many people in too small of a space.) And I would (and have) say something to a manager if a CM handles a bad situation well.

 

[Eeyore1954]

Originally posted by inaminute
To sit back and say, "sorry, not my problem" is giving permission for the bad behavior to continue.

I disagree. The people being discussed here are not children, they are adults. It's not my place to try to teach some rude adult basic etiquette. If they didn't learn this as a child, it's probably too late to teach them now (although I dislike taking such a pessimistic view). I'd like to believe most people would realize their rude behavior and correct it ... but I am a firm believe in MYOB in public. Now if the person became physically abusive, then I'd probably do something to intervene... but I've never encountered that yet. (Thankfully!)

Bullying is not acceptable by anyone at any time or place--no matter how old they are. I applaud those who stand up and say "no more" to a person bullying someone else.

I agree ... and more power to those who choose to play etiquette cop. That's just not a role I choose to play in real life.

 

[RickinNYC]

Originally posted by Eeyore1954
I disagree. The people being discussed here are not children, they are adults. It's not my place to try to teach some rude adult basic etiquette. If they didn't learn this as a child, it's probably too late to teach them now (although I dislike taking such a pessimistic view). I'd like to believe most people would realize their rude behavior and correct it ... but I am a firm believe in MYOB in public.

Sorry, but I completely 100% disagree with you in every way, shape and form. Those "adults" that behave in such an incredibly aggressive manner are not "adults" but emotionally stunted children. Clearly, IMHO, they have grown accustomed to getting their way by their aggressive, if not downright threatening, tactics. They remind me of spoiled little snots (not exactly the word I was thinking of) who stamp their feet and scream bloody murder until Mommy/Daddy stuffs a candy bar in their mouth to shut them up. You do that often enough, they evolve into the overgrown child I saw at WDW.

Will I ever let them get away with it? Good God no! Am I the "polite" police? Sure, if you're compelled to label me that way. If that ever becomes a title, I'll gladly wear the badge.
Be bully to someone in front of me, be prepared to get publically humiliate by yours truly. There is no room in my world for a person like that. And I'm not going to step aside without calling you to the floor.

 

[RUDisney]

This is a learned behavior for many people. They know that to get what they want, all they have to do is act up and "the customer is always right" will take over.

It's about time managers gain some backbone when things are wrong and tell the customer that they are wrong. There are ways of getting what you want without becoming abusive. Those people who treat the clerk, CM, etc., with respect are the ones who should get the extras. But, too often, the nice ones are the quiet ones and we know what happens with squeaky wheels.

 

[jeffemy]

I think the whole intervention question depends on the circumstance. For the most part, if I felt something another guest was doing was inappropriate, I'd try to report that behavior to a manager, supervisor or security just because of the whole "you don't know how people are going to react thing". Depending upon what it is,if it directly affects me or my family, I usually say something. Unless you are actually faced with a certain situation, it's difficult to say exactly how you would react.
My family and I were at BB last year in the family raft ride line. Ahead of us was a family with a daughter who had downs syndrome. They were forcing this child to go on the ride even though she was obviously terrified, screaming, sobbing and trying desperately to pull away. It made me physically ill. I went over to the CM operating the ride and informed him of the situation. He ended up pulling that family aside to talk with them. Whether they eventually went on the ride I don't know.
A friend of mine works at a local grocery store. She encountered a customer in her line who was hitting her small child, with hard close- fisted blows. My friend closed her line, went to the courtesy desk and called the police.
Were we wrong to intervene in those situations? Should everyone no matter what ,just MYOB and not get involved?