scottishduffy
<font color=green>I was walking around and providi
- Joined
- Aug 21, 2007
- Messages
- 1,429
Alright, Mainly a vent here. Just need to get this week off my chest.
DH and I went to visit my parents this week and to see my Brother and SIL who were in town with my newly 1 yr old nephew. Now, I freely admit i don't have kids but my parents and I were more than taken aback at several things. My mother addresses the issues in one conversation with my brother, yet i feel compelled to get a general consensus about our feelings. Brother basically told us we are all being way too overprotective. Soooo... a couple incidents.
1) Baby Home alone: Nephew was napping last weekend when Bro and SIL decided to go to church. The leave nephew ALONE at the house, then call DH and I from their car to say "Just show up at the house before 5, he wakes up around then." We had not been asked to babysit, he called from the road to say the baby was alone and at that moment asked us to watch the kid.
DH and I *flipped* and got to the house ASAP. Sure, baby was napping and OK.... but seriously, leaving a 1 yr old alone? Apparently Bro also left him napping alone later in the week to run errands with SIL, at which point my Mom had a long talk with Bro.
2) Allowing baby to crawl pretty much unsupervised around a pool and in a parking lot??? Bro and SIL set Baby G down on ground to crawl everywhere. At the parking lot I was picking him up from the street to not allow him to crawl there, of course nephew got upset and both parents admonished me to let him crawl in the parking lot, because he loves tires. At the pool they also set him down to crawl while they went to the hot tub. He crawls to the pool to play with water, and picked up bottle caps from the bushes to try to eat... Only myself and my father watching out for the kid.
My family and I don't mind watching nephew, we just wish they would TELL us when he needs to be watched. Instead they would just set him down to crawl or play anywhere, then expect other's to watch him.
3) We also got really sick of them ignoring him when he cried. Baby gets grumpy or upset. "Oh, he wants Auntie Duff! Oh he wants Grampa". Ummm. nooo. I have not seen Baby for 6 months, I am a virtual stranger to him. The child was reaching out for Momma, not ME. Yet SIL and my Bro refused to pick him and deal with him.
I just got frustrated when last night they again set him down to crawl at a party and did not bother to look at him for 4 hours. We tried to bring the baby back to both parents (like when he was hungry, or cranky) only to be told what a *perfect* opportunity this was for someone else to care for the little bundle of joy. I am not about to let my nephew suffer so of course I get the joy of feeding him dinner, consoling him when mom and dad let him tip over a tree, changing him into pajamas, and rocking him to sleep at a party.
I felt very put out by all this and felt like my brother and SIL were checking out as parents. Even when Baby G got a bump on his head at the party (see above mentioned tipped over decorative tree), Mom and dad were nowhere to be found. They had LEFT the party for a few minutes. He cried, i comforted him and dealt with him. I love him, but this is not MY responsibility.
I would not mind babysitting if they had come up to me earlier and asked me to. But instead they just dropped him on the ground at the party, talked about him having enough fun crawling, then didn't see him for 4-5 hours. Did not give him dinner when asked, or comfort him when he was grumpy. I told my brother i felt very put out by all of this, and was told I did not have to feed him or watch him at the party. That if he hurt himself "he would learn a lesson". That if i hadn't fed him, someone else would notice he was hungry and feed him. If he cried, then someone would pick him up and help him. Meanwhile I try to keep nephew from tipping others trees, and destroying wine bottles.
GGrr, am i right to be angered by all this? Who the heck just does this crap? Are they THAT clueless? We tried to be direct and still they brushed the baby off.
It feels good to get that out.... Thanks for the venting session.
DH and I went to visit my parents this week and to see my Brother and SIL who were in town with my newly 1 yr old nephew. Now, I freely admit i don't have kids but my parents and I were more than taken aback at several things. My mother addresses the issues in one conversation with my brother, yet i feel compelled to get a general consensus about our feelings. Brother basically told us we are all being way too overprotective. Soooo... a couple incidents.
1) Baby Home alone: Nephew was napping last weekend when Bro and SIL decided to go to church. The leave nephew ALONE at the house, then call DH and I from their car to say "Just show up at the house before 5, he wakes up around then." We had not been asked to babysit, he called from the road to say the baby was alone and at that moment asked us to watch the kid.
DH and I *flipped* and got to the house ASAP. Sure, baby was napping and OK.... but seriously, leaving a 1 yr old alone? Apparently Bro also left him napping alone later in the week to run errands with SIL, at which point my Mom had a long talk with Bro.2) Allowing baby to crawl pretty much unsupervised around a pool and in a parking lot??? Bro and SIL set Baby G down on ground to crawl everywhere. At the parking lot I was picking him up from the street to not allow him to crawl there, of course nephew got upset and both parents admonished me to let him crawl in the parking lot, because he loves tires. At the pool they also set him down to crawl while they went to the hot tub. He crawls to the pool to play with water, and picked up bottle caps from the bushes to try to eat... Only myself and my father watching out for the kid.
My family and I don't mind watching nephew, we just wish they would TELL us when he needs to be watched. Instead they would just set him down to crawl or play anywhere, then expect other's to watch him.
3) We also got really sick of them ignoring him when he cried. Baby gets grumpy or upset. "Oh, he wants Auntie Duff! Oh he wants Grampa". Ummm. nooo. I have not seen Baby for 6 months, I am a virtual stranger to him. The child was reaching out for Momma, not ME. Yet SIL and my Bro refused to pick him and deal with him.
I just got frustrated when last night they again set him down to crawl at a party and did not bother to look at him for 4 hours. We tried to bring the baby back to both parents (like when he was hungry, or cranky) only to be told what a *perfect* opportunity this was for someone else to care for the little bundle of joy. I am not about to let my nephew suffer so of course I get the joy of feeding him dinner, consoling him when mom and dad let him tip over a tree, changing him into pajamas, and rocking him to sleep at a party.
I felt very put out by all this and felt like my brother and SIL were checking out as parents. Even when Baby G got a bump on his head at the party (see above mentioned tipped over decorative tree), Mom and dad were nowhere to be found. They had LEFT the party for a few minutes. He cried, i comforted him and dealt with him. I love him, but this is not MY responsibility.
I would not mind babysitting if they had come up to me earlier and asked me to. But instead they just dropped him on the ground at the party, talked about him having enough fun crawling, then didn't see him for 4-5 hours. Did not give him dinner when asked, or comfort him when he was grumpy. I told my brother i felt very put out by all of this, and was told I did not have to feed him or watch him at the party. That if he hurt himself "he would learn a lesson". That if i hadn't fed him, someone else would notice he was hungry and feed him. If he cried, then someone would pick him up and help him. Meanwhile I try to keep nephew from tipping others trees, and destroying wine bottles.
GGrr, am i right to be angered by all this? Who the heck just does this crap? Are they THAT clueless? We tried to be direct and still they brushed the baby off.It feels good to get that out.... Thanks for the venting session.
Letting a child crawl around a pool and/or parking lot is just asking for a drowning or accident.
