After a few minutes of pedal to the metal, Sally's foot got tired of pushing so hard.
"MissCammie...you can take over the foot part if you want to...okay? I'll just drive!"
Sally loves to be in charge of where things go. She didn't earn her nickname of MissBossyPants for nothing. Once she has control of something, she wants to be the boss of it and NOBODY can help her. She's one of those kids who will ask for help, but then won't let go of the thing she needs help with so she can GET HELP. It drives me absolutely batty. She'll come to me with something that won't work...a toy, or something-or-other she can't get to work. She'll ask me to help her with it...but I can't get it out of her hands. She's just bound and determined not to let something leave her grasp of control. It's gotten to where we have to GO OVER handing me the something she wants help with so I can actually look at it, or she needs to fix it "her own self" as she is fond of saying.
I looked at Sally's foot firmly holding down the pedal and it didn't look as though she was going to be moving it any time soon.
So I said to her:
"Sally do you REALLY want me to do the foot part, or are you going to change your mind last second and end up stomping on my foot to get the foot part back...b/c if you stomp on my foot we are going to be in a fight...you know what I'm sayin chickadee?
She considered my words. She knew full well that if I took over the foot part and she ended up changing her mind, her knee jerk reaction would be to stomp on my foot to regain control. (not stomp hard, just put her foot back on the pedal even though another foot now occupied it. I had no trouble if she changed her mind...it was being stepped on that I would find unacceptable...b/c I'm bossy too and I appreciate words..."MissCammie may I control the pedal again please"...I do NOT appreciate someone physically forcing an issue...y'know?) Sally knew I would not be happy about having my very nicely pedicured toes trampled upon.
"I'll keep driving my own self...it's okay."
indeed.
*ahem*
Surprise Surprise, Sally and I came in FIRST...before her little brother and daddy. As we were getting out Sally said to me:
"MissCammie we SO won! We BEAT the boys team didn't we?!"
"yes ma'am...beat em good!"
Teddy came skipping towards me...he knew that our car was in front of theirs. So he said
"MISSCAMMIE! We BEAT the cars BEHIND US...the ones we were RACING WITH..." He then shot his sister a sideways glance before he added "We were only racing with the cars BEHIND us!"
Teddy is no dummy either.
Sally rolled her little eyes and said "Teddy, you can't just race with the cars behind you b/c that is called not being fair."
Hmmmm...as fair as "racing" with a car that can't pass you perhaps?
Jay ended it all with:
"EVERYBODY WON. PERIOD".
As we turned to head back towards Dumbo, I realized that it felt like my eye socket was throbbing. This is not a pleasant feeling. It hurts. I commented to Jay that I was getting a headache. Sally suddenly raced ahead of us towards a cart. Then she was shouting:
"Bring the money Daddy!! QUICK"
Somehow that little angel talked the person manning the cart into letting her take a bottle of Diet Coke before her daddy had "brought the money". While Jay was paying for the Diet Coke and some waters for himself and the kids, Sally walked back towards me very slowly. She looked like she was holding a stick of dynamite. When she reached us she said:
"Here MissCammie, it's cold and I didn't shake it and I took it from the bucket my own self b/c I didn't want your diet Coke to be shooken..."
I love that girl. She is so well trained...
Naw, bossy though she may be, she is incredibly caring. She is just a very good girl. A very BOSSY good girl...just like her very bossy control freak step mama. But I get her. I do. She lives in a world where choices were made for her. Big choices that upended her life. She's got to protect her moments of control when she can. I get that all the way. Just so long as my pedi doesn't get stomped on. We have to have limits after all!
So I downed some advil with my cold, not "shooken" diet coke. I am well aware that Diet Coke is a drug in and of itself. I need it. I crave it. I love it. If I could marry a soda, Diet Coke would be it! Even though I sort of don't like the name "diet" coke. I mean really...I'm not on a diet. It's such antiquated term for sugar free soda. Why not call it "Caffeine fix without the calories" Coke? Pretty snappy name if I do say so myself...
*ahem*
darn those digressions
back on track
We rode Dumbo in all it's high flying glory. Sally, of course, controlled the flight. We rode in the "Pink" dumbo, and her little rescued friend was right behind us in the "Purple" dumbo. She kept waving and saying "Belle, HI Belle!!" Sally confided that her mom had told her that Dumbo was a baby ride.
I responded with:
"Get me a baby bottle of Diet Coke then because I LOVE Dumbo!!"
Sally leaned against me for a minute as we were high above fantasy land and said:
"You aren't a baby MissCammie. I like Dumbo too. Just because I like elephants...and elephants are real...aren't they!"
oh goodness it's so hard not to have a Donald tantrum. It was annoying the peawaddin (YES I said Peawaddin...it IS a word...my granddad uses it all the time which automatically makes it a word! It is something that can get annoyed out of you if you are Southern...IT IS TOO...)out of me that "mommy" kept bumming Sally out. I was positive that the week spent away from us before we went was filled with talk of how stupid Disneyworld is and how none of it is real and what a waste of time it all was.
RAR!
Here is a LOVELY picture...camera was obviously on the wrong setting. When I showed the picture to Sally she said "oooh LOOK, you can see the MAGIC!" see, she's still got little girl in her! So I wanted to show the magic to all y'all!
We landed our Dumbo flight and headed to Peter Pan next. I love love LOVE this ride. LOVE IT! Peter Pan is one of my all time favorite Disney movies. I love the Darlings. I love Wendy. I love Tinkerbelle and her big hips. (y'all remember that scene, where she is posing and preening on the mirror and realizes she's got some Pixie junk in her trunk?
Most REAL moment EVER in a film.) LOVE IT!! Sally was a little worried b/c it was "dark" in there, but she rode with me anyhow. We looked for "Ariel" and waved to her as we flew by. I could hear Teddy squeal over Captain Hook and the Lost Boys. We all had fun. Even Jay says that "Pete and Wendy are a cool ride".
The sun was starting to go down as we exited the ride. I REALLY wanted to do Mickey's Philharmagic. I know I always say this, but Mickey's Philharmagic is my ALL TIME FAVORITE...short movie as an attraction...at Disneyworld. It stars my alter ego Donald in all his quacking, tantruming, lovable glory. I knew that the kids hadn't seen this before and I knew the surprises would be magical for them!! So we headed in for some pie smelling, wine cork blasting, water splashing movie MAGIC!!
As I had anticipated, the babies LOVED Mickey's Philharmagic. Teddy squealed with delight when the whine corks blasted by his head. He reached out for Donald and declared he had felt his beak "a little bit".
Sally was singing all the songs as she held her daddy's arm, "just in case". A magical time was had by all! As we exited the theater Sally said to me "MissCammie, we have GOT to do that one again!!"
I noticed that Sally was limping a little bit. I looked down at her foot and saw that her flip flop was sorta cattywampus on her foot. (Cattywampus is ALSO a word...it means "askew"...it's in the dictionary...I SWEAR...look it up!!)
"Hey Sal, why are you wearing your flips like that?"
"Well, my toe inbetween hurts..." (sally makes up words from time to time...like her step mama that girl!) So I had her sit down in the kid transporter so I could look at her "toe inbetween". And sure enough there was a big icky looking owie. She'd walked it past the blister stage and now there was a flap of skin all ripped and ragged looking. *sorry--gross I know*. I was a little aghast that Sally hadn't said anything. When I inquired as to why, she answered in an exasperated voice:
"Because there is NO whining at Disneyworld!"
wow...guess who felt like the BIGGEST jerk EVER. Yep...me. I did quarter eye brow her and explain that if something honestly HURTS, it's not whining. It's getting necessary medical attention...WHICH I was able to administer from my handy dandy little first aid kit! (AND I'm first aid certified...which makes putting neosporin on the owie much more official and effective!) She could not wear those flips anymore though. When I said as much to Jay, Sally said sweetly in her most injured voice:
"MissCammie...I noticed that there were YELLOW
crocs at the store where we got Daddy his hat...and since I'm wearing a yellow dress wouldn't yellow Mickey crocs look nice with my dress? Ooooh ouch my toe inbetween hurts...*cough*"
So with strict instructions keep an eye out for Lady Tremaine and STALK HER if she happened to show up...Miss Cammie high tailed it to main street...as fast as one can high tail it through a sea of humanity...some of whom had forgotten to use deoderant that day...or week...or decade...seriously people...RIGHT GUARD!!! My queasiness was sorely tested as I dodged and weaved through the crowd. The store was blessedly empty as I headed for the crocs wall. Sally's feet have grown recently and her 2/4 crocs were beginning to get a tad small...so I was on the hunt for the 3/5 yellow Mickey Crocs. I finally found a pair and rushed them to the counter. I could hear music in the background outisde...DRAT...the first parade must be starting. I was NEVER going to get back across to Fantasyland which meant I was NEVER going to get to see Lady Tremaine EVER and the whole trip was RUINED. *sniffle*
I seriously was wondering how I would ever make it back. But I'm sorta little and wiry...I figured some well timed elbows and polite "excuse me's" would get me through! After I purchased the what amounted to $35 children's crocs after tax...
I scurried out to main street and towards the castle. Of course I was stuck stuckity stuck. All the escape routes were roped off. So I had no choice but to stand there as the Captain Jack Sparrow float...floated by...I happened to look up and STRAIGHT INTO THE EYES OF CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW.
I am not kidding. The man was looking right at me. And I don't know WHAT possessed me, but I put my hand over my heart and mouthed "I adore you Jack"...He blew me a kiss and said back "Can I have your number?" I found my self mesmerized and following the float...until I smacked into somebody's sweaty non deoderized body. *GAG* With that grody SMACK back into reality I set back to trying to make my way back to fantasy land. I was still aflutter from my brief interlude with Captain Jack...I practically FLOATED over the crowd...
I sneaked a look at my cell phone. Oh WRETCH and CUSS WORDS! We were quickly running out of time. It would be time for the PPP special Wishes soon and then we'd have to set to parade route place marking for the later parade...which is a competitive sport amongst some Disers I've been told... and we had yet to get our picture with Lady Tremaine. I finally made my way back to fantasy land and delivered the overpriced but very darling and dripping with guilt Yellow Mickey Crocs. Sally was quite happy. She very casually said "Ummm did you buy these with my money or daddy's money?"
She's a sly one, Sal...never misses a trick.
"They are a special present to you Princess Sally for being so brave and following the rules so extraordinarily!"
"Oh GOODY!!" She placed her feet into the roomy squishy crocness and did a few turns. She pronounced them "Very YELLOW and comfy". NOW we could turn to the task at hand...I WANTED MY DANG PICTURE WITH LADY TREMAINE!!!! *QUUUUUAAAAAAAAACCCCCCKKKKKK!!!!!*
I marched with purpose towards the place they were supposed to be. The place we had been told they would be in "TEN MINUTES...plus 84,000"...But nobody was there...except another woman who was looking expectantly around along with her very bored looking son. I recognized another lady with a mission. So I asked her if she was waiting for Lady Tremaine and Step sisters.
"YES! I am!! I've been waiting!! They are SUPPOSED to be here!! I am WAITING until they show up." Period!
I was much cheered to have a fellow Lady Tremaine stalker to keep me company and make me feel less like a weirdo!
Jay took Teddy and Sally to "powder their noses" while I waited. The fellow Lady Tremaine stalker and I talked about being Disney freaks and how excited we were to get a picture of not very often out characters. She collected character signatures too...the rarer the better! (My personal holy grail of signatures and photo ops is with Hyacinth the ballerina Hippo from Fantasia. It keeps me on my toes...no pun intended...having a difficult quest at hand...*cough*)
Jay returned with the munchkins. He asked if we'd had any luck. With my eye throbbing again and my diet coke fix wearing off, I nearly put on my sassy pants and said "Oh yes dear, can't you see Lady Tremaine standing here beside me...while you snap my picture?"
But I kept SnarkySue in check and told myself to quit being such a grouchypants. (My husband is a lovely, wonderful man and he puts up with my insanity without complaint. Captain Jack WHO?!)
Super Sally was on the lookout for the Lady...She "heard" them before she saw them. She grabbed my arm and said in a whisper "They're coming MissCammie, QUICK start the line with that lady before somebody cuts you!" Anyone who has an elementary school aged child will know that she was not referring to a sudden and vicious knife fight for the first in line spot...she was well aware that people were closing in on the spot that fellow stalker lady and I had been staking out. She was further aware that these people were going to try to make a line that named THEM first. Sally was not about to have that happen. Girl had my back! Super Sally was on the job and people better BACK UP!
Lady Tremaine and her daughters swept into the courtyard. They were an explosion of color and noise. Full on in character. Oh I was thrilled to my toes! Sure enough people surged forward. And do y'all know what Sally did. She grabbed my hand and the fellow stalker lady's hand and drew us forward. When another woman tried to step in front of us she put her arms out wide and said very clearly. "NO CUTS".
I died. I stared at her in shock. Y'all know that scene from The Little Mermaid when Sebastian's jaw drops open...that was me. Who WAS this child?! Her bravery was astounding. I stifled a laugh as I took my place at the HEAD of the line...behind fellow stalker lady...she was there first after all! The handler further helped Sally out by saying "You heard the Princess...the line forms HERE" and she pointed behind Sally! The crowd fell in behind us and we waited for our audience with Lady Tremaine!!! Sally stood firmly and bravely next to me with her hand on her hips. She was NOT playing.
When it was our turn...which was pretty quick...thanks to Super Sally...we went forward to claim our signatures! I asked Teddy if he wanted me to get a signature for him, but he was getting sleepy and was totally uninterested in "Ladies with bright faces".
We walked up and Sally said straight off "This is MissCammie and SHE'S a step mom TOO...but NICE!" She was making it very clear that she knew that Lady Tremaine was NOT nice...without saying it. To the Lady's credit, she gave a wonderful response. She said that perhaps if her STEP daughter would invite her to parties more often, allow her and her daughters to stay in the castle once in a while, she wouldn't feel so cross. Sally very diplomatically said:
"Well maybe if you say sorry, she'll forgive you and you can act nicer and then you can have a play date."
The step sisters laughed and carried on and said "Oh YES, mother let's schedule a play date with Cinderella!!" They were a lot of fun. Lady Tremaine commented on my outfit and told me I was "exquisite"...ha ha ha...
We FINALLY got our pictures. There was a photopass picture person there, and Jay was taking pictures too, so Sally was never sure which camera to look at. The pictures weren't perfectly perfect, but we got them and felt VERY satisfied with ourselves!!
Here's a blurry sort of picture...for purposes of protecting the innocent (sally) and the non photogenic...(me). But I figured y'all wanted to see a picture after all this chitty chat I've been doing! So...here it is!!! (I think they were commenting on my outfit!)
okay y'all, my husband is officially annoyed at me and making "you are SO neglecting me" sighs...so I had better get off the computer before I have to sleep with the dog!
Up Next: Wishes, Special Edition...and the "COOLEST PARADE EVER"!!!
Kids are VERY honest little creatures. We just have to teach the nuances of social appropriateness and keeping judgments about others to ourselves...which proves to be VERY tricky!
