A Daily Lesson in Parenting and Manners: A TR by a real life Wicked Stepmom!

[disneydance]

Great job as always and i want more now

 

[lookingforward]

I am loving your trip reports! Thanks for sharing in an entertaining and warm way.

 

[gogo65]

I have just read your trip report from start to finish, and it is by far the most entertaining I have read, Yes there have been tears on my part, and plenty of laughs.

It really worries me if I cry at someone else's trip report, what am I going to do when I finally get there, my kids will be so embarrased?? I will be the one crying before I even walk through the gates.(or probably at the welcome to WDW sign while I'm on the magical express!)

Looking forward to the rest of your trip report.
Thanks for the laughs

 

[Backstage_Gal]

Another great installment, Miss Cammie, Bravo!

I am sorry for what the kids and you are going through. I hope it gets resolved quickly.

Looking forward to more!!

 

[Shannie]

Cant wait to read more of your trip report!! Tell Sally we are ALL proud of her for sticking up for that little girl!! Ahh, the magic of Disney....gotta love it!!!

 

[KimAshton]

I just read your whole trip report and I just love it. Your step kids are so lucky to have you as a step mom.

 

[winkers]

"That...was GOD"...then she turned on her heel and flounced into her bedroom!

:

I've wanted to say that to many people!!

 

[minnieluvzmickey]

I just got done reading the whooooole thing. I am so enjoying your report!!! Keep it coming! I can't wait to read the rest.....it is getting me in the mood for my Dec. trip.....like I needed any help

I am also a wicked stepmother...........we have 4 boys........his, mine and ours and we get lots of drama from my dh's ex..........we call it BABIES MAMA DRAMA!

Good luck with everything! We went through some custody issues last year and my dh now has primary custody of his son. It is wonderful for him and us! There is hope............keep your chin up!

 

[disneydance]

Is MissCammie gone today or what where are you MissCammie we miss you

 

[Chris]

Another great chapter in your trip report!

 

[ENSOCK]

Miss Cammie is missing! Oh Miss Cammie where are youuuuuu! After the weekend I had Miss Cammie I need more trip report (or wine).

 

[CampbellScot]

*Sorry this installment is so late y'all. It's been a busy couple of days! School starts tomorrow and we're all running around like maniacs trying to get things in order! Another chapter will be up ASAP...and hopefully longer...and more interesting than this one was..."

When last we met, Super Sally was furthering the "Girl Power!!!" movement, andTeddy was looking for anything he could climb on...and jump off of. Jay and I have gotten the "CAREFUL" chorus down pat! This child trips on painted lines. I have seen him standing totally still and manage to trip...or slip...sometimes I wonder if Sally hasn't got a voodoo doll going...I've never seen anyone trip and fall flat while standing still. But Teddy can do it. It doesn't phase him a bit. He just gets up and keeps on going. If he's bleeding, he'll wipe it off on his sleeve...he's used leaves before...and just keep playing. This boy is ALL GO.

While Jay and I watched the kids play for a bit, we discussed our game plan. We were planning to ride Dumbo and Peter Pan. Hit the LONG day line rides. While we were talking a woman came over to tell me how "clever" she thought my outfit was. I thought this was very nice, as it isn't very often that someone walks up to you just to tell you something nice! She and her husband were watching their little girls frolic around as well. I think they were both dressed as Tinkerbelle. The kids I mean...not the parents! I thanked her for noticing that I was in Snow White's "day" wear. Her husband laughed and said I looked just like Snow White, red ribbon and all. Well my goodness...talk about a love fest for MissCammie! They were a really funny couple. They were telling Jay and I how when their little girls won't eat or are being difficult at the dinner table, the dad will go and put on a Snow White wig and sit at the table and say "C'mon girls, are you going to eat or what?" In a sort of Liza Minnelli voice. A "drag" QUEEN if you will. They seemed like a very nice couple. Their little girls were darling little Tinks. It's always nice to see people who enjoy their kids and really seem to enjoy being parents. Y'know?

After a few minutes, we needed to shake a tail feather! Pooh's thoughtful spot is great and all...but come on...we're at Disneyworld...we are NOT here to play at playgrounds...know what I'm saying? We've got rides to ride, treasure to collect, characters to...stalk...

It was clear pretty quickly that we would be stalking characters this evening...as every line we saw for characters was a mile long...and without FAIL, every time we'd get in line, determined to stick it out and wait for our turn with WHOEVER...the handler would say "Oh I'm sorry...the line is closed...come back in 84,000 minutes..." RAR!

The kids actually handled this much better than I did. I was on a mission of my own. I wanted to "meet" THE wicked stepmother of stepmothers...I wanted to meet Lady Tremaine...Cindy's tormentor...Or as Sally calls her "The mean lady with the SKUNK hair." (Some would argue that Snow White's Step Mother was much more wicked than Cindy's stepmom, but Snow White's Stepmom was really a WITCH...which disqualifies her...from the step-mother catergory...and yes I spend WAY too much time thinking about these things...) *ahem*

See, a dear friend of mine, and fellow Wicked Step mom had been to Disneyworld a few weeks before. She had gotten her picture taken with Lady Tremaine as a tribute to her "Wicked" Step mom status! (Which is funny b/c she is quite possibly the least wicked person,let alone step mother, in the world!!) ANYHOW...I wanted me one of those pictures. I NEEDED ONE...I was on a QUEST! Lady Tremaine and her daughters were right where my friend had told me they would be! I was so excited I did a little hop skip of my own!!We hop skipped to the line and "Oh I'm sorry...yada yada yada".

I hadn't even said a WORD and Teddy grabbed my hand and said "It's okay MissCammie. Do you want to sing the "Have Patience" song?

NO I do NOT want to sing the have patience song! I sing that to y'all when YOU are being impatient and mostly I do it to bug you (just kidding...sort of... )...and I just have to say, it IS an irritating song...especially when feeling rather impatient! GOODY!!! I'll sing it twice as often!!! Hey don't judge...it's a wicked thing!

So rejected and annoyed we decided to walk a bit. We kept an eye out for X's and treasure collecting opportunities. Eagle Eye Sal spotted every single X in the vicinity. Although she was not very pleased that Disney's idea of treasure was CHOCOLATE!! "MissCammie, why can't VANILLA ever be a treasure?! Don't people even know that not everyone of the WORLD likes chocolate?!" She was starting to get a pout on. Sad eyes, deep tortured breaths...So I smacked her with an eyebrow and said "Awww...poor Sally. Poor kid in Disneyworld with her pricey Belle dress on being FORCED to endure a special party that only hands out chocolate for treasure...somebody call the UNFAIR POLICE!!!"

Sally deeply hates it when I say things like that. At Grandma's house, there would have been a desperate search for vanilla something so poor Sally wouldn't feel "left out". PUH-LEEZ...(and the child eats M&M's...by the handful...so her dislike of chocolate is selective and usually comes about when she feels the need to "attention seek".) It's VERY effective with most of her family...not so much with her wicked Stepmom. I'm just mean and mock her sorrow at not being given vanilla treasure. Seriously though, kids drive me nuts when they are being handed the WORLD and they still find something to fuss about. Makes me want to yank a ponytail!

But the good thing about Sally is that she gets it. She knows when she is being a pootsnorkel and she is able to turn herself around quickly.

She whipped out the necklace she'd gotten at the last treasure station and said "But LOOK MissCammie!! I LOVE my new JEWELRY!!!"

that's BETTER!!! I pretended I was about to tickle her, just seal the restored good attitude in. She gave a scream-laugh and ran to daddy for protection from the evil Tickle Monster...I just LOVE IT when the eyebrow and a bit of mocking yanks them visibly back in line...power is a DELICIOUS feeling...muahahahaha...

The lines were pretty long at Dumbo and Peter Pan, so Sally suggested the "Car Driving Ride". It was one of the things she remembered from her first trip to Disneyworld. Jay smiled at her and asked if she remembered riding with him.

"Yes I remember!! And Mommy took pictures...from a bridge...because you were still married with mommy...remember that Daddy?"

and SNAP, just like that the clouds rolled in. I could see the guilt beginning to blanket her small shoulders. Sally had caught herself having fun when she was supposed to be missing her mom and trying to remember what she LOOKED like... Jay swooped her up into his arms and twirled her around in circles. He didn't know what else to do. He felt trapped in that moment with her and somehow responsible for her sudden sadness. Twirling her in circles and making her squeal with laughter was enough to shake the clouds off and strap her back into the "Disney Happiness Bubble". I could hear Donald in my head...starting to get his quack on when Teddy suddenly shouted:

"MISSCAMMIE!!!! LOOK IT!!! LOOK AT THOSE BUSHES!!! THEY ARE IN THE SHAPE OF CAPTAIN JACK MICKEY AND PRINCESS MINNIE!!! THAT IS SO COOL!!!! HOW DO THEY GROW BUSHES IN THE SHAPE OF GIANT MICE?!"

Teddy was absolutely beside himself. As I mentioned earlier in the report, Teddy LOVES "freaks of nature". He loves it when out is in and in is out and upside down. Bushes are supposed to be green and..."bushy"...if you will. They are NOT supposed to grow in the shapes of GIANT MICE! Trying to explain topiaries to him would have been totally useless. I was about to say "Magic" when Sally said to him...

"Teddy they are like CLAY and Mickey and Minnie posed for them and someone carved them, except out of bushes...and you don't have to SHOUT because EVERYBODY of the WHOLE WORLD just heard you..."

Teddy wasn't listening to his sister at all. He had run up to the railing surrounding the "bush sculptures" to get a closer look. He walked back to us shaking his head and said "That's so cool MissCammie. What will they think of NEXT?!"

Where does he get these phrases?!

Captain Jack Mickey

Sally and I LOVE Princess Minnie!!!

Freaky cool bush thrill over, we headed to the Car Driving Ride...aka the Indy Speedway. I'm always amazed how much this place yanks me back to my childhood. Something about the sounds and smells remind me very much of motocross races. My dad rode bikes for the Suzuki motocross team when I was really little. Like two-ish...and I have a very clear memory of my dad in his head to foot motocross gear holding me in one arm and accepting a trophy with the other...He was really good. My sister and I used to use his trophies to build cities for our barbies!

*CAMPBELL...THIS IS YOUR BRAIN AGAIN...TRIP REPORT NOW...THERAPY LATER...*

oh yes...where were we?...Indy Speedway...loud and smelly...Teddy was so excited to see a "REAL RACETRACK!! WITH REAL CARS!! AND EVERYBODY IS RACING THEM!!" Oh this child is a speed demon, so the Indy speedway was his idea of heaven. I was a little worried he wouldn't be tall enough to drive though. When it was almost our turn Teddy said to me

"MissCammie...it smells a little bit around here..."

"What does it smell like Teddy Bear?"

"Exhaust Fumes...it must be the fuel they use...I hope it's not combustible"

seriously...that's what he said. Word for word.

Where on EARTH did the child hear about EXHAUST FUMES and fuel?! And just what does he know about anything being COMBUSTIBLE?! Does he even know what combustible means?! Geez...do I know what combustible means? I was about to ask him his thoughts on existentialism and it's application in current society when it was our turn to hop into a car!!!

AWESOME!!!

Teddy and I were going to ride together when Sally decided SHE wanted to ride with MissCammie. You see her thought process on which adult to ride with was "Fun and not possibly scary rides: MissCammie...Even a remote possibility of something being scary or unexpectedaddy. See Sally figured that if something scary and/or horrible was going to happen on a ride, her odds of surviving dramatically increased if she rode with the man who had the muscles. She loved Teddy and me, but she wasn't about to risk her own life for a RIDE! No way, no how. It seemed, at first, that in watching the riders race around the track that the car driving ride switched from "Possibly Dangerous" to "Not Dangerous". Therefore she wanted to race for the GIRLS TEAM!!!

Teddy had no issues with who he rode with, so he happily joined the BOYS TEAM. Now as I've said before, our Sally is no dummy. What was REALLY behind the switch was that Sally was aware that the car Daddy and Teddy would be in was going to be BEHIND the car she and I would be in...she was further aware the cars BEHIND could not pass the car in FRONT if it was in the same lane...which would put her in FRONT of her little brother, making Sally the WINNER of the race. Winning is VERY important to Little Miss Type A. It's apparently more important than riding in confirmed safety with her daddy. Sally was ready to WIN!

She and I hopped in and we buckled up. After a few jerky spurts of stop and go, Sally got her groove on, put the pedal to the metal and we...put putted around the track...

"Is this as fast as this thing goes?! How can you race when you are going so SLOW?! How can you BEAT someone in such a slow car?!"

"Slow and steady wins the race SallyRally"

"MissCammie...I am NOT a turtle OR a hare. I am a princess and I want to go FAST!"

Now if THAT isn't foreshadowing, I don't know what is!

*note to self: Sally is grounded from the car upon earning her drivers license*

Up next: Will the Quest for Lady Tremaine be realized? Also the SECOND "serious injury" of the trip...

 

[burly]

Still here. Still along for the ride! Put put.

 

[mikamah]

I started this before we went away for the weekend, and want you to know that I thought of you when we walked to the pool house from our condo, and I made my son wear a t-shirt, just because, and I also thought of you as I swam in the pool, aka toilet for little ones.

You have such a wonderful knack for writing. I have had tears rolling down my cheeks this morning reading about Sally and Minnie. You must have been a mess. She sounds absolutely precious. It must be so frustrating to see what she is going through. It is too bad some parents just can't put their children first. It sounds like you had a wonderful trip, filled with magical moments. They are lucky children to have you as a mom.

My son is 5 as well, and can't wait to be a teenager so he can become a ninja turtle. He'll be living in the sewer, where moms aren't allowed, but he'll come back and visit me. We can't walk by a sewer without checking for turtles. Love their imagination and wonder.

hugs on the ear infection. And good wishes and prayers that all works out in the custody battle.

 

[Avivasmom]

"Exhaust Fumes...it must be the fuel they use...I hope it's not combustible"

seriously...that's what he said. Word for word.

Isn't it amazing the things kids say these days. When I was his age no clue what combustible meant. Aviva is the same way she blows me away with her vocabulary.

School is so different now then back then, don't you think?

 

[CampbellScot]

Still here. Still along for the ride! Put put.

glad you're still along for the ride!!!

I started this before we went away for the weekend, and want you to know that I thought of you when we walked to the pool house from our condo, and I made my son wear a t-shirt, just because, and I also thought of you as I swam in the pool, aka toilet for little ones.

You have such a wonderful knack for writing. I have had tears rolling down my cheeks this morning reading about Sally and Minnie. You must have been a mess. She sounds absolutely precious. It must be so frustrating to see what she is going through. It is too bad some parents just can't put their children first. It sounds like you had a wonderful trip, filled with magical moments. They are lucky children to have you as a mom.

My son is 5 as well, and can't wait to be a teenager so he can become a ninja turtle. He'll be living in the sewer, where moms aren't allowed, but he'll come back and visit me. We can't walk by a sewer without checking for turtles. Love their imagination and wonder.

hugs on the ear infection. And good wishes and prayers that all works out in the custody battle.

Thanks so much for your kind words and thoughts. I am continually amazed at how Dis'ers touch one another's lives. Words are powerful things.

Your little one has quite the imagination!! Teddy wants to be a "builderman" when he grows up. He says he's going to build me a roller coaster! I wouldn't be surprised if he did! Is your little one going to be a Ninja Turtle for Halloween? I can't believe it's already getting to be that time.

Thanks for reading!!!

Isn't it amazing the things kids say these days. When I was his age no clue what combustible meant. Aviva is the same way she blows me away with her vocabulary.

School is so different now then back then, don't you think?

Oh my goodness school is so different. Teddy knows all about the planets, which order they are in...he knows about things I don't think we started learning until 3rd or 4th grade. He scares me sometimes with his intelligence. I can see his mind working and oh my is that child WILLFUL sometimes. I suppose that is all part of the process of learning boundaries, but I'm pretty sure that he knows that when he is told to stop throwing a ball against his bedroom wall that kicking it against the wall instead is pretty much the same thing! STINKER.

 

[snowwhite325]

I scared the poor dog again because I was laughing so hard

 

[jordansmomma]

Oh Miss. Cammie
I was gone for the weekend and i caught up this morning. I was rolling with laughter all morning. Kids just say the darndest things, don't they?
Oh I am just a plane ride away sister.

We have been working with the kids A LOT on censoring their observations of others. It used to be really bad...such as "That person is ugly" or "That person is REALLY fat isn't she MissCammie?"...hurtful comments that were chuckled at in one house were met with complete intolerance at another...I'll let y'all guess WHICH house was which... Sally has gotten much better at it as she doesn't like to be mean on purpose. She DID enjoy making her grandfather laugh though, which was why that was such a problem in the first place. I think in this instance she turned her inner censor off in her excitment...that or she was checking to see if the same rules applied at Disneyworld as they did at home...

When my DS11 was 3, he was quite the talker. We were grocery shopping at Safeway and there was this rather large lady who well her cart was full of junk food and we were getting ice cream for daddys birthday party. My DS looks at the lady and says "mam, do you really need that ice cream and pizza? You are fat enough arent you?'" oh lord i just wanted to crawl under a rock and die!!!!! I couldnt not apologize or get out the store fast enough!!

She put her hands on her hips. Wow, that's usually a stance saved for her most annoyed moments with her brother. She asked the little girl if she needed help. When she got a tearful "My BROTHER wont' let me OUT!" Sally slapped that boy with a "look" and said:

"You let her out RIGHT NOW you...you BROTHER! THIS is Disney and we aren't supposed to make each other cry at DISNEY! It's a RULE!!" She said it with such sass and righteous wrath that I wanted to cheer!!!

Sally took a step forward which caused the offending and somewhat surprised brother to back into the tree, then she grandly told the little girl to come "join the GIRLS team!"
GO SALLY!!

 

[CampbellScot]

When my DS11 was 3, he was quite the talker. We were grocery shopping at Safeway and there was this rather large lady who well her cart was full of junk food and we were getting ice cream for daddys birthday party. My DS looks at the lady and says "mam, do you really need that ice cream and pizza? You are fat enough arent you?'" oh lord i just wanted to crawl under a rock and die!!!!! I couldnt not apologize or get out the store fast enough!!

When I was about two I was in a diner with my dad. We were on a road trip of some sort and dad had taken me in with him to get something to drink. Apparently there was an ENORMOUS woman sitting in one of the bar stools. Her bottom was sort of hanging over the seat and dad said that on the way by I poked her right in the bum. Not hard...but more in awe and wonder!

My mom said that my dad came hurrying out of the diner with me in his arms, doing his best to hold in his roar of laughter until we got outside.

He handed me to my mother and tried to tell her what had happened but he was laughing so hard he couldn't get it out. When my mom said "Well for goodness SAKE what happened?!"

My two year old self said "Big Bottom Mommy!"

My dad still laughs like mad when he recounts that story. Kids are VERY honest little creatures. We just have to teach the nuances of social appropriateness and keeping judgments about others to ourselves...which proves to be VERY tricky!

 

[sharkB8HooHaHa]

Miss Cammie,
I had some catching up to do, but I'm up to date and ready for another installment.

I've got to tell you, (not that you need to hear it from me) those are some fantastic kids. The fact that they decided on the plane to go to Pooh first because it's your favorite shows what delightful people they are. That is just so sweet.

Good luck with the first day of school!