Well I had my good laugh for the day!
Background: We have vending machines in the cafe on the unsecure floor. One of the soda (pop for you Ohio folks

) machines is very, uh, tempermental. It's the kind that has the little arms that retract to allow the bottle/can to slide off the shelf and drop down. The little arm snaps back into position and blocks the next bottle from falling.
Well some of the arms either get stuck or snap back too fast thus preventing your item from falling. Worse yet, many times the bottle falls and is standing up when it gets to the bottom and so you can't open the door to get it!!
Went to get a soda just now and there's a sign on the machine:
Quote:
"Dear Vendor:
I have been ripped off by this machine, YET AGAIN! Please please please fix it or bring us another one! And remember, we have access to WMDs so if this keeps up, your machine may turn into a smoking hole in the floor!
Name Amount
______ ______"