playing ketchup here...
Just like my DH
He hates the drama...his family has had quite a few family feuds over the years and he avoids it all as much as possible.
Don't let the resentment build up too much -I speak from experience

Pick your battles-appear to compromise and go along with things that don't matter to you and then stick to your guns on the important stuff.
Yeah I know easier said than done

I would try to insist that you really like the planning part of your vacations and try to coordinate your plans with your Inlaws as much as possible without sacrificing your mustdos
My DH isn't suppose to drink anymore either due to a medical condition. Funny how he didn't drink much before but as soon as someone tells you you can't-he misses it
Thanks for the hotel info
I think 2 years after someone hit you is not a long time
I get along ok with one of my sil and the other one is so out of touch with reality she's scary

Same with my sisters- one I'm good with the other drives me nuts
Actually the nice thing about a cruise is that a family can each go their own way and then meet up for dinner

We haven't been able to get family to go with us on a cruise yet-that may not be a bad thing