5th grade pool party pity invite-need advice

[snowball22]

Hey Dis family members. I need some advice on a situation. My ds just got finished with fifth grade. I was walking with some mothers yesterday who were talking about a "secret pool party" in a few days. The one mother looks at me realizing that I have heard this and then says, "Oh, didn't you get the e-mail I sent about the pool party last night?" I said no. Oh, well......we are having a pool party for only some of the fifth graders from the school. We didn't invite everyone so we did the invites by e-mail so the not invited ones would not get their feelings hurt. She tells me to check my e-mail again to see if I got it. I didn't, so I e-mail telling her so. So she sends me a revised time and does not send the original invite with the details. I e-mail her again and then ask for the original invite to be sent. She sends me an e-mail saying she no longer has the original invite but to read the attachment. Well, there is no attachment so this means I have to e-mail her again to ask for the attachment and now it is all starting to get on my nerves. So, the question is.............Do you all think she didn't invite my kid in the first place and is trying to make up for it by this pity invite? Should I just not care and not e-mail her again. She and I have known each other for a couple of years. She is a consultant for a product and wants me to be on her mailing list to buy merchandise from her. I have helped her this year at school and my kid knows all the kids who are going to the party. What would you do? Thanks again for all your opinions and advice.

 

[Beauty]

Hummm I honestly don't know. Does your child get along well with these other kids? There is a group of kids at J.C.'s school that invite him to things but he doens't get along with them that much. He doesn't dislike them, they just act differently from him and are into different things. I think I would leave it up to your son.

 

[Tinkbell]

Did your son know about the party? Even if it was a "secret" the kids are bound to talk about it amongst themselves. If your son didn't know about it, he probably wasn't invited.

 

[snowball22]

My son gets along with these kids great. He gets along with everyone. He is well liked. No, my son had not heard about the party, but the mother claimed she had only sent the invite out two days ago.

 

[Tinkbell]

I guess it just depends on if you feel like contacting the mother again. Ask your son if he would like to go. If he does, try to reach that mom again. Hope he has a fun time. As a fellow Ohioan, I would love a good pool party right now. It's HOT!

 

[Cantw8]

Don't you just hate this time of year? All this crap really gets old. I agree with the poster who said to ask your son if he even likes these other kids.

 

[Rock'n Robin]

I think I would take him to the zoo or the amusement park or something cool like laser tag and forget about it.
Robin M.

 

[luv2nascar]

why couldn't she does tell you when you were there the details when, time etc and send the email. I don't think she originally invited your son. JMHO
I probably wouldn't send my daughter in that situation

My dd just finished 4th grade came home with an invite to a pool party whole 4th grade is invited - invite done on computer handed out to everyone. She can't go because we will be in disney.

 

[Bob Slydell]

Sounds like she screwed up by letting the party slip out (BTW, why are mothers walking around talking about "secret parties"? ) and now she's inviting your DS to cover up for it.

If I was your DS, I wouldn't go. Last thing he wants is to show up and have kids asking how he got invited.

 

[SC Minnie]

I would respond to the email again. Take your son somewhere else that day-- maybe have him invite another friend.

 

[snoopy]

Sounds like she left you off the list and now she is trying to cover up for it.

I hate those sort of parties. I've always told my kids they have two options -- a big party with me and their dad and silbing, plus cousins and family friends; or a school party at home with ALL of the members of their class invited. I can't stand that pick and choose crap. Sorry your son was a victim to this.

If I were you, I'd merely tell my son he got an invitation to a pool party and leave it to him whether he wants to go or not. I would not go into detail about the second-hand invitation, but I'd certainly save it in my memory bank for future dealings with this woman.

 

[dg39]

Check your spam folder, maybe by chance, the original invite is in there.

Us as adults would naturally say, don't let him go, take him someplace else, etc. But, lets remember he's a kid who would probably love to go to this pool party. If I were you, I'd give the woman the benefit of the doubt, and if my ds wanted to go to the party, I'd send him. I wouldn't e-mail her again, though for the details, I would have my ds call up the kid and ask him when and what time the party is. If your son gets along great with these kids and their all friends, then there's no reason not to send him. If he wasn't originally invited, I could only think its because its a pool party. You need 5 million eyes when you have alot of kids in a pool. The woman probably only wanted a small amount of kids, because of safety issues. Don't take it personally and if your son really wants to go, send him, but, don't tell him about the mix up with the invitations.

 

[Alicnwondrln]

she is obviously trying to cover up
i would ask your son as he is gonna hear about it at school and you dont want his feelings hurt
if schools over i dont know then
but i would stop helping her and buying stuff from her
its not nice at all what she has done
i would probably say no thank you and next tiem she asks for help sy\ay sorry to that as well

 

[Puffy2]

A tricky one.

Just my opinion:

If you feel that your intuition tells you this woman is full of it, don't subject your son to this party . Make other plans - plans he would enjoy and send a "sorry we can't attend" email. I also wouldn't purchase anything from her ever again either or help her with her business.

What ever your son decides to do with or without these kids in the future is up to him.

 

[Keli]

Honestly, since you have no proof either way, I'd just assume she's telling the truth, call and get the details needed and then give your ds the option of attending just like you normally would. If you son gets along well with the invited boys then there's a good chance if he was excluded it was purely a numbers thing and one more boy won't be too much more trouble.

 

[shortbun]

Yeah, what Keli said! Send him to the party. He will have fun. It's not about you.

 

[snowball22]

Thanks everyone!!! Not sure what we are going to do but I am leaning towards not having him go.

 

[Alicnwondrln]

so what happened with this??