3 families, how to share food costs?

[duffy]

It's not as obvious as I first thought.

First family: me, my husband and our 15-year old vegetarian daughter. Hubby and I are carnivores.

Second family: our oldest daughter and her partner. Both are carnivores.

Third family: our middle daughter, her husband and their toddler daughter. All are vegetarians.

Score is tied, vegetarians 4, carnivores 4.

My husband and I are supplying accomodations, a 3-bedroom condo. Each family will have to get their own tickets and provide their own method of arriving at the condo, flying or driving. I will donate some money to help pay for tickets for the adult daughters and their partners, pay the entire cost of ticket for our 15-year old, and the toddler granddaughter is free.

Now it gets complicated! I'm willing to spring for a few big family meals, and for the most part I think that when in the parks, each family pays for their own food. But, we will have a full kitchen, and all will want to save money by eating a few meals at the condo, or at least getting snacks to keep in stock.

How do we do this fairly? Does each family put in, say, $50 towards groceries? Or should everyone just get what they know their family wants to eat, and label it? Does each family get a shelf on the fridge? What if my 15-year old eats something that her sister meant to be for the baby?? What if the vegetarians don't want their money going towards the purchase of meat? What if the carnivores want to buy nothing BUT meat??

Of course I am joking, but only partly. Does anyone have any tips for cooperation? I think what would work, is that I'll use a grocery service to have the most basic stuff, like milk, coffee, cereal etc. there for us, and then we'll go get groceries, and yes, everyone pitch in $50. Then, it's all "help yourself".

What do you guys think?

Oh, almost forgot: do the grocery delivery services deliver to non-Disney hotels? How do we set that up, if we don't know our room yet?

Thanks.

 

[2forMe]

I would ask your 2 adult daughters what they would like to do.. then go from there.

 

[duffy]

But...that's so easy!! Why didn't I think of that?

Seriously, I did, I just forgot to mention it. This trip is so far away-Feb. 2013-and we don't have anything pinned down yet but the condo. I'm thinking way, way too much in advance, and they have busy lives. It will be MONTHS until we are ready to discuss this.

I guess, I really just want to know how other big groups handled this situation. What has worked for others?

 

[PrincessSteph]

I have vacationed with family a couple of times:

When we went to Disney (with mom and dad), we have stayed in a hotel so each family paid for their own meals.

Last week we were in North Carolina (with my parents, my sister and her family). Mom and Dad paid for the house and each family paid for transportation. My sister and I split the cost of food 50/50 (I have 3 kids and she has 1 - her's is much younger so needs specific foods whereas my kids can eat what the adults eat). This split worked out well for us.

We will be going out of town with my ILs soon and the plan is each family (4 families total) is responsible for providing dinner one night (pay, prepare and clean).

None of the above is the answer to your question, but is what I have personally done.

 

[2forMe]

But...that's so easy!! Why didn't I think of that?

Seriously, I did, I just forgot to mention it. This trip is so far away-Feb. 2013-and we don't have anything pinned down yet but the condo. I'm thinking way, way too much in advance, and they have busy lives. It will be MONTHS until we are ready to discuss this.

I guess, I really just want to know how other big groups handled this situation. What has worked for others?

good luck....

 

[duffy]

Thanks.

We're having a long weekend this Labor Day, and will all be together for 3 days in a condo in Vermont. I'm thinking that will be a practice!!

That will obviously be different, but we did this last Labor Day, and everyone brought food (we all drove there) and once there, we all kinda whomped our meals together. We all pitched in for food and the condo.

This year, my husband and I decided to pay for the entire condo-by far, much more expensive than food costs-and the adult kids only have to provide food. It is more sensible, they live in New England, and we have a 10-hour drive. We'll also be in the condo for almost all the meals.

Still, that's not the same as a week at a place where we'll probably be away from the condo most of the time. Hmm... (ponders more)

 

[Luv Bunnies]

I think I would have one person from each family go shopping together. Each person chooses and pays for food for their family. Then, keep the food separated in the fridge and cupboards. It's the only way to ensure that no one pays more, and that no one feels they paid for something their family didn't eat. Or, that they paid for something that everyone else ate before they got to it! Each person can decide how much they want to buy and, consequently, how much they want to pay. I'm all for keeping things separate when dealing with groups.

 

[momof3ds]

I would ask them.

My initial thought is to have everyone throw in $ for group items and then they can pay for specialty items themselves and put those on a separate shelf.

 

[amylynne01]

When we went in January, we traveled with 4 of us (me, DH, and 2 girls) and my parents. We got a grocery delivery and split it - we paid 2/3 because we had 4 people, and parents paid 1/3 because they had 2 people. We all eat relatively the same things, but mom needed coffee creamer, and we needed soy milk for DD2. But even if we were split 4 veggies and 4 meat eaters, we wouldn't bother breaking it down line by line to see what family should be paying for every item. Just seems like too much hassle.

Think about what you'll actually be buying. If it's just drinks and snacks, I don't see a need for each family to buy what they want. You can do one trip and split it by person/by family/whatever you decide to do. We got breakfast stuff (cereal, bagels, poptarts, juice, etc), snacks, drinks, and stuff to do sandwiches for lunch in the park. We never made a full meal in our room because frankly we were never there lol.

ETA: I vacationed with my parents, my 2 sisters, and our families at a beach house in June. We made a huge grocery list, my mom went shopping, and we split the food cost per person regardless of age and eating habits. Then any alcohol was split between those who drink (DH and I do not). Like I said earlier, it just wasn't worth it to us to analyze the receipt. You eat what you want when you want. If you really wanted something, put your name on it!

 

[duffy]

Thanks. That's why I love the DIS: getting ideas, and finding out what actually worked!!

I am sure that we'll end up getting a delivery of the basics, coffee, juices, etc., and making at least one run to the store.

I remembered one tip from our trip last Labor Day: middle daughter was the last to leave, she got stuck doing her laundry, running a load of dishes, etc. BUT, they also got "stuck" taking home all the unused food!!

 

[MSSANDRA]

When we travel with friends, a couple times a year, we do a kitty. Each family puts in a set amount depending on estimated cost. We use this for groceries and those little things that always come up. If we travel together in a larger van as we sometimes do, also for gas. At the location the moms go grocery shopping and we all just put in the buggy what we might need, No problem throwing in the cereal you know you kid likes. If there is any large item one person wants or needs, a special bottle of wine or diapers or whatever, they always insist on paying for this item. This works because no one in our group will take advantage of the others and we are all very laid back. One person that we travel with at times is single but always insist on paying the same. She says she does not have to support kids 51 weeks a year she is happy to support our for one week! . One family has one child, and two families have two.

Most meals eaten out, each family pays it own bill. One friend is a doctor and makes more than the rest and will sometimes pick up the tab or have the waiter put dessert on her check. Many times one family will pick up doughnuts or ice-cream for everyone.

We sometimes travel with my sisters family and this plan works for us as well. We however will travel with my BIL and his family to WDW sometime in the next year and I expect much more clear cut divisions to be necessary for that trip.

 

[Schmoodle]

We spend a week each year at the beach with extended family. There are usually about 4 family "groups". What we do is each family volunteers to buy groceries and cook dinner one night for the entire group and for another night they are the cleanup crew. For your group, carnies would have to make sure there is a veggie option, and veggies want to make sure their meal appeals (even if no meat, they could do a meatless lasagna, other pasta, or pizza). Then we usually are on our own and eat out a couple of nights as individual families. Or we order pizza. Each family brings or gets what they want to have around for breakfast, lunches, or snacks, and we mostly respect the boundaries (though there is a lot of sharing). This works out the expense and labor are pretty evenly shared. We are on vacation, so nobody gets too tense about it!

 

[kisaacs]

Here's what we generally do on our trip to NH or Cape Cod in the summer. The group is 6 adults, 2 small children. One of the adults is a vegetarian. The group is:
My mom and dad
Me, DH, DD(3), DS(2)
My brother and his wife (the vegetarian)

My parents pay for the house. My brother and I split the food. I set up a google doc ahead of time in a spreadsheet. It has a list of meals on one tab and the grocery list on the other. I send it out and have everyone add what they want. When it's done, I order it for delivery. Then it's a free for all. That way, everyone has a say in what to get, knows what the plan is, can contribute to the ideas for food, and it's done. We can just enjoy vacation from there on out.

Kristen

 

[Darcy03231]

When we went there were nine of us, me, my two teenagers who like to eat, my mom, my sister, her husband (who also likes to eat) and there three children who eat like birds (one of which was a toddler).

We bought the groceries and consider my family to be three units, my mom one unit and my sister's family 3 units. We divided the bill by seven (7 units) and then we each paid our share. Anyone buying alcohol was on their own. If we ran out of something we bought more and split it the same way.

 

[duffy]

Great ideas!

 

[The Hendies]

Don't assume the veggies will cost less than the carnies. Food for our DD (veggie) is often MORE than meat! Organic this, fresh that..... If finances for both younger families is fairly even, then I would honestly just do an even split. Then if there are specific foods for a specific purpose, put those foods in a special place, otherwise, munchies, drinks, etc are up for grabs. I personally am not a fan of labels, (marking your territory), but it might work. Hope you have fun planning, and have a wonderful family time!

 

[aidtrismommy]

I would have each family pay for their own food. It is simply the easiest. If you feel like paying for a meal in the parks, or whatever, then that can be your treat! As far as groceries for the condo, if you are eating meals there then defiantely plan a menu and split that 3 ways. For snacks, each family can pick out what they want and pay for it and have a certain place for it in the kitchen. It doesn;t mean people can't share though. We often travel with a different family and if people want to share, we just ask. But keeping things organized and having a plan is a great idea, so what you are doing is great!

 

[duffy]

Don't assume the veggies will cost less than the carnies. Food for our DD (veggie) is often MORE than meat! Organic this, fresh that..... If finances for both younger families is fairly even, then I would honestly just do an even split. Then if there are specific foods for a specific purpose, put those foods in a special place, otherwise, munchies, drinks, etc are up for grabs. I personally am not a fan of labels, (marking your territory), but it might work. Hope you have fun planning, and have a wonderful family time!

Oh, I already KNOW how expensive those veggie meals can be!! We stock up on Morningstar stuff when they are on sale. What are the odds of there being a sale on them at the stores near our condo when we're there? Probably very low!!

 

[pinktink83]

Divide up the meals and have each family take one- they provide the ingredients necessary for everyone to eat that meal.

When my cousins and I go to our family cabin together, thats what we do. We split up breakfast and dinner duties, and we all bring sandwich stuff for lunch and snacks to share. So one morning I do breakfast for everyone, we share lunch, and other cousin makes dinner for everyone. Next day, other cousin makes breakfast, we share lunch, and I do dinner, etc. Snacks are for everyone to share.

Or you could just split dinner duties and tell everyone to bring sharable breakfast items, ie, breakfast bars, yogurt, string cheese, fruit, etc. Eat-on-the-go type fare. For lunch buy PB, Jelly, Honey, lunch meat, cheese and Mayo and everyone makes their own sandwich.