........................

[freckles and boo]

I would have to disagree. I think children in general know what makes them happy and not happy. While those feelings change rapidly it doesn't make them any less valid. In the long run is it really hurting them to learn the importance of presenting ones self well? While some of the stipulations are crazy like tanning salons, make-up and pretty dresses are fine IMHO.

That sounds like very weak justification. There are many ways to build a child's esteem and to teach her how to function well in society that don't involve skin deep value judgments about appearance. Children's pageants don't exist to help children. They exist to line the pockets of the industry.

 

[mjkacmom]

I watched those shows late last night, only because my girls Irish Dance. Some of the Irish Dance messages boards have threads about how Irish Dance has become very pageant-like. $2000 dresses, big wigs, tons of makeup, fake tanner (usually only on legs). I decided it's not the same at all. I think any dance form has that element, in some who go over the top. But my kids will NEVER EVER have a $2k dress. They will never EVER get to compete overseas, it's not in the budget. Especially for a HOBBY.

We drive quite a distance to compete sometimes, and stay overnight in a hotel if they compete early the next morning. But we decided this IS our vacations. Competing in Rochester? Try out the Strong Museum. Competing in Niagara Falls? *Duh, what should we go look at??*

Pageants, I just don't get them. Like any sport/children's activity, they can be made worse by over-invested parents. Did anyone hear the little Bella, who won the second-highest title of that show's pageant, crying "I won the money back" over and over? She KNEW the prize covered the entry fee. At 5, that's what she focused on.

I agree - I know many who compare the two, but dance is a lot of work! A lot of girls from dd's dance academy compete overseas, but I don't see us doing it. So far, I won't drive more than 45 minutes to a Feis, and she's very happy with her $400 dress. I do see girls getting burnt out, when it takes over every aspect of their lives, and they are unable to do anything else.

 

[amyhughes]

It's great you want to teach them that but the truth is people can't see how intelligent you are. They can't see creativity. Those are qualities that are seen after people get to know you. Aesthetic beauty is becoming more and more important I think in this society. It is can be a hard pill to swallow but, it's true. If what we wear isn't important we wouldn't have high end fashion or stores like Sephora. Anti- Aging products and dieting would not be popular. Beauty in America is important. i think people hate pageants because it forces them to see the truth. We judge people by how they look and then if they are acceptable we choose to get to know them.

Are you friggin kidding me? With all of the visual arts out there you can't "SEE" creativity?

 

[freckles and boo]

It's great you want to teach them that but the truth is people can't see how intelligent you are. They can't see creativity. Those are qualities that are seen after people get to know you. Aesthetic beauty is becoming more and more important I think in this society. It is can be a hard pill to swallow but, it's true. If what we wear isn't important we wouldn't have high end fashion or stores like Sephora. Anti- Aging products and dieting would not be popular. Beauty in America is important. i think people hate pageants because it forces them to see the truth. We judge people by how they look and then if they are acceptable we choose to get to know them.

You can see intelligence. It shines in a child's eyes. You can see creativity. It is evident in the way a child plays and communicates with others. You can see kindness and compassion, too. Likewise, there are plenty of vacuous "beauties" out there. You can see emptiness on a pretty face.

 

[taximomfor4]

I agree - I know many who compare the two, but dance is a lot of work! A lot of girls from dd's dance academy compete overseas, but I don't see us doing it. So far, I won't drive more than 45 minutes to a Feis, and she's very happy with her $400 dress. I do see girls getting burnt out, when it takes over every aspect of their lives, and they are unable to do anything else.

hehe. If we would only drive 45 minutes to a feis, we'd only get to go to ONE per year. Can't wait till my youngest is out of Advanced Beginner, so we can stop being at every feis at the crack of dawn! Then we'll be able to drive in the early morning, so NO hotels!

 

[NTDreams]

That sounds like very weak justification. There are many ways to build a child's esteem and to teach her how to function well in society that don't involve skin deep value judgments about appearance. Children's pageants don't exist to help children. They exist to line the pockets of the industry.

I'm not saying pageants are the only way. There is art, sports, dance, gymnastics... I could go on. I just don't think it's bad if you keep them focused and well rounded. I think Bella was the only kid who seemed to want to do the entire ordeal. I also think the parents they showed were part of the bad side of pageants.

 

[luvmy3]

I'm not saying pageants are the only way. There is art, sports, dance, gymnastics... I could go on. I just don't think it's bad if you keep them focused and well rounded. I think Bella was the only kid who seemed to want to do the entire ordeal. I also think the parents they showed were part of the bad side of pageants.

Is there a good side?

 

[JESW]

So, do you think the girl got the cow????

Dd9 and I have seen that show 2x now and saw the other show (girl from the UK) for the first time. It was dd's request to watch it. Wow, can't believe what some people go through....those poor girls!

Jill

 

[disneyjunkie]

In the show they said it cost up to $900 for an entry fee, plus many flew to the competition or drove a mighty long distance. Additionally there were hotel stays, meals, false teeth, spray on tans, false eyelashes, expensive clothes, etc. There were 64 competitors; the grand prize was $1000. I don't get it!? What is the attraction for the parents? The Mom gets to wear a crown? Their kid gets to wear a sash and say they are prettier than everyone else? Very disturbing.

The money issue was crazy. How much money did the put out for a chance to win $100.00?

Didn't one lady say her daughter's dress was $2000.00?

I watched it last night. I think beauty pageants are fine at any age. Lets face it as a society we ALL judge people by how they look, what they wear and how they present themselves. I see nothing wrong with it as long as your child wants to do it. The lesbian, black couple bothered me though. She clearly wanted to do it herself. My husband is anti pageants though I would want to enter any daughters I have into some. We don't live in an area that has many pageants though. It seems to be a southern region event

Every parent in that room wanted to do it themselves.

I sat through many dance recitals. I've yet to parents in the back of the room doing the dance routines while their child is on stage.

I would have to disagree. I think children in general know what makes them happy and not happy. While those feelings change rapidly it doesn't make them any less valid. In the long run is it really hurting them to learn the importance of presenting ones self well? While some of the stipulations are crazy like tanning salons, make-up and pretty dresses are fine IMHO.

On a 5 year old?

 

[EmmersIsTheMommy]

I watched the pre teen one last night, I haven't seen the younger one yet. The preteens aren't quite as creepy to me for some reason..but once you get the 3 and 4 year olds smiling perfectly..it's entirely creepy. And..weird.

*shudder*

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Well I don't care what anyone says. These pageants are the mothers living their dreams. They just use their kids to participate. It makes me sick. Dressing up for fun is one thing. Dressing like a streetwalker is quite another. I think any parent who thinks it is a good idea to dress their pre-schooler up in full Joan Collins makeup and a Dynasty like dress and then parade them in front of a room full of people to be judged needs therapy because they are seriously messed up.
There are no redeeming qualites in pageants as far as I am concerned. I have yet to see a Mom that has gone through pageants her whole life that is now putting her kids in them. The Moms that we see on these specials are not exactly pageant material (nor am I so I am not slamming them) and they are so lacking in self esteem it is ridiculous. They are making their child be everything they never thought were (beautiful) and what they always wanted to be. Those women would be beautiful if they were not so focused on acting like Gypsy Rose Lee. Enjoy your children. Celebrate them for who they are not for who you want to be.
I think it is a form of abuse and a magnet for wackos. JMHO.

ETA- Yes- I am very judgmental on this subject. I know, so no need to flame me for it.

 

[EmmersIsTheMommy]

Not only that but then extremely photoshopping their pictures? So they don't even look HUMAN? How does THAT make the girl feel? Yeah you're totally not good enough so we need to FIX YOU

 

[DisneyMomx7]

Well I don't care what anyone says. These pageants are the mothers living their dreams. They just use their kids to participate. It makes me sick. Dressing up for fun is one thing. Dressing like a streetwalker is quite another. I think any parent who thinks it is a good idea to dress their pre-schooler up in full Joan Collins makeup and a Dynasty like dress and then parade them in front of a room full of people to be judged needs therapy because they are seriously messed up.
There are no redeeming qualites in pageants as far as I am concerned. I have yet to see a Mom that has gone through pageants her whole life that is now putting her kids in them. The Moms that we see on these specials are not exactly pageant material (nor am I so I am not slamming them) and they are so lacking in self esteem it is ridiculous. They are making their child be everything they never thought were (beautiful) and what they always wanted to be. Those women would be beautiful if they were not so focused on acting like Gypsy Rose Lee. Enjoy your children. Celebrate them for who they are not for who you want to be.
I think it is a form of abuse and a magnet for wackos. JMHO.

ETA- Yes- I am very judgmental on this subject. I know, so no need to flame me for it.

I couldn't have said it better myself!

I think most of these "pageant moms" are beauty queen wannabees.

I laugh when they all talk about how much their kids want to be in pageants - sometimes the kids they are talking about aren't even two yet!

 

[aprilgail2]

Well, I prefer to teach my daughters not to judge people on their looks. Vanity is not a very becoming trait to anyone. Why reiniforce stereotypes in our youngsters. Do we not want them to think more of themselves? I want my daughters to see beyond beauty when they look at people. But, that is jmo.

 

[TheZue]

My husband and I watched that with our jaws dropped last night. That girl that won was pretty darn cute and awsome...mainly because she didn't really move until she was on stage then she just went NUTS But it was still sad, did anyone hear what she was saying after she won? "I won the money back"........wow.

If these were just about little girls being cute it wouldn't cost almost as much as the prize to enter and the judges wouldn't be so picky about the dresses or non conformity...the judge demoting points because of that long dress comes to mind or the little girl getting in trouble for walking how SHE wanted to walk. This has everything to do with conforming to an arbitrary standard while grabbing the parents money and not a whole lot to do with how cute those kids are.

 

[mjkacmom]

hehe. If we would only drive 45 minutes to a feis, we'd only get to go to ONE per year. Can't wait till my youngest is out of Advanced Beginner, so we can stop being at every feis at the crack of dawn! Then we'll be able to drive in the early morning, so NO hotels!

LOL - dd is now a novice - parking will be a PITA, however! Next weeked's Feis is less than 1/2 hour, and in March, 1 is 1/2 hour from here, the other, 20 minutes! However, if we stick with it, I know it gets worse - my gf drove her dd 8 hours, and didn't even stay overnight! And she didn't end up qualifying!

 

[sdarwkcabemanmy]

I watched the "Toddlers and Tiaras" and my jaw hit the floor. Spraytans for preschoolers? I mean really? NO thanks.

People have asked us if we've ever considered putting DS in commercials, print work, etc. I always say no..that's not a life I want to get into, thank you very much. He is cute as all get out,but I don't want him thinking that he be a certain way, look a certain way, dress a certain way to be liked or accepted.

We've even had people ask us if we're going to 'fix' the slight gap in his front two teeth on top when he's old enough. The dentist hasn't said there is a problem with the gap and we'll let HIM decide if he's uncomfortable enough about it to get it fixed. WHEN he's old enough to make the decision. And not before.

 

[mhsjax]

It's great you want to teach them that but the truth is people can't see how intelligent you are. They can't see creativity. Those are qualities that are seen after people get to know you. Aesthetic beauty is becoming more and more important I think in this society. It is can be a hard pill to swallow but, it's true. If what we wear isn't important we wouldn't have high end fashion or stores like Sephora. Anti- Aging products and dieting would not be popular. Beauty in America is important. i think people hate pageants because it forces them to see the truth. We judge people by how they look and then if they are acceptable we choose to get to know them.

I think I have to chime in here. I think that maybe people are too heated over this topic to really think about what you are saying. or Maybe not, but anyway, I do despise these pageants for little girls. I do however understand what you are saying I just think they go to extremes. Yes we are judged on how we look, but we also need the inner qualities to go with that, and you can teach your children how to present themselves well without all of this craziness. I know that if two people go for an interview with basically the same skills, the more attactive one will be the one hired. It is the way of the world, like it or not, that is the world we live in, and looks sell. Like I said you have to have an even balance of both, and these little girls are way to young to be applying tanner, tons of make up and false teeth so the look better.

 

[teacups]

I watched it last night. I think beauty pageants are fine at any age. Lets face it as a society we ALL judge people by how they look, what they wear and how they present themselves. I see nothing wrong with it as long as your child wants to do it. The lesbian, black couple bothered me though. She clearly wanted to do it herself. My husband is anti pageants though I would want to enter any daughters I have into some. We don't live in an area that has many pageants though. It seems to be a southern region event

Count me out of your meaning "ALL" above. I DO NOT JUDGE PEOPLE ON HOW THEY LOOK OR WHAT THEY WEAR.
That shows stupidity. Not you personally.... just the thought of judging people that way.

 

[teacups]

It's great you want to teach them that but the truth is people can't see how intelligent you are. They can't see creativity. Those are qualities that are seen after people get to know you. Aesthetic beauty is becoming more and more important I think in this society. It is can be a hard pill to swallow but, it's true. If what we wear isn't important we wouldn't have high end fashion or stores like Sephora. Anti- Aging products and dieting would not be popular. Beauty in America is important. i think people hate pageants because it forces them to see the truth. We judge people by how they look and then if they are acceptable we choose to get to know them.

Maybe the people who cant see it... dont have it?
Important in society? Over my dead body will I teach my kids to care more about whats imporatant in society over whats important in their own hearts. Hmmm... to each his own I guess.