***2009-2010*** cheer parent thread!!

[mygirlkristi]

Well, here we are at critcal mass in the cheer season - and we find ourselves considering switching gyms. I just don't know what to do. Our current team has 3 new coaches - a big unknown. And we have lost 5-6 really good cheerleaders due to the coaching change. The team and environment feel a little unstable. We are currently at a gymnastics facility that is working up a cheer program. There are two teams right now - mini level 1 and jr. lv 3. Dd is jr. lv3. Last year our team did mostly regionals and took many first place awards.

The gym we are considering going to is a cheer gym with a LOT of teams. Dd would be jr. lv 2 for this year - which is fine. But I am unsure of joining such a huge organizaiton - afraid that my dd might get lost. They also go to larger comps - so the fees are higher. But maybe it would be worth it - because the instruction does seem to be good.

Having said all this, DD is 8 - and she doesn't love the idea of leaving her friends at our current gym.

I could really use some advice. Is it better to have my dd do one more year at our current smaller gym? Or should I have her switch to this mega-teamed cheer gym? I'm really confused - and we do need to decide right away. You all know how fast time is ticking by.

Can anyone offer some advice?

 

[addicted2dizney]

Well, here we are at critcal mass in the cheer season - and we find ourselves considering switching gyms. I just don't know what to do. Our current team has 3 new coaches - a big unknown. And we have lost 5-6 really good cheerleaders due to the coaching change. The team and environment feel a little unstable. We are currently at a gymnastics facility that is working up a cheer program. There are two teams right now - mini level 1 and jr. lv 3. Dd is jr. lv3. Last year our team did mostly regionals and took many first place awards.

The gym we are considering going to is a cheer gym with a LOT of teams. Dd would be jr. lv 2 for this year - which is fine. But I am unsure of joining such a huge organizaiton - afraid that my dd might get lost. They also go to larger comps - so the fees are higher. But maybe it would be worth it - because the instruction does seem to be good.

Having said all this, DD is 8 - and she doesn't love the idea of leaving her friends at our current gym.

I could really use some advice. Is it better to have my dd do one more year at our current smaller gym? Or should I have her switch to this mega-teamed cheer gym? I'm really confused - and we do need to decide right away. You all know how fast time is ticking by.

Can anyone offer some advice?

This is a tough one and I feel your pain, been there done that! On one hand I look back and say, "if I knew then what I know now, I would have never started with my original gym or I would have left sooner!" On the other hand your daughter is only 8 and there is a team at your smaller gym that will offer up a challenge for her this year to get her level 3 skills and she can have fun with her friends.

There are so many ways to look at it. Will the mega gym be a further car ride? Will the extra costs be a strain on the family? Does your daughter eat, breathe sleep cheer? Does she appear to have the drive and desire to someday be a level 5 athlete? If she really has the desire and drive to be her best the larger gym will be a plus for her, she will thrive no matter where she is and will have the knowledge of these coaches that have made the mega gym a "mega gym" If she loves to be at her gym and loves to be around her friends maybe give her one more year. She is young and it really needs to come from the girls if they want to change. I took my DD to a mega gym in NJ and although she loved it and thought it was so cool to be there she didn't like the idea of cheering there. She left her small gym for a medium/large size gym. A place that has 11 teams so there are levels for all but they still know every kids name. We've been in this 7 years now so we know this is the right mix for her. Each kid is different and the one thing you have on your side is time.. plenty of years left. Take the lead from your child and what she is looking to get out of it. Good luck and let us know what you decide!

 

[mygirlkristi]

Thank you so very much for replying.

According to my DD - this is her sport - and she wants to someday be level 5 and maybe even make it to college cheer. Now having said that - she has to work HARD for her tumbling skills - she's been working a back tuck for a while and isn't ready. But she is a good flyer - and she loves stunting.

The larger cheer gym has 3 facilities. They just opened a branch gym near our house - 5 miles away - so we'd go there to start. The "mother ship" gym of theirs is about 35 min. south of us. So, for example, when they go for clinics or camp - they'll go to the main BIG gym. But for regular practice, they'd practice at the satellite close to our home. Meanwhile, our current gym is a 30 minute drive in the opposite direction.

It is a huge jump financially - that's to be sure. That worries me a bit. I just wonder if we stay where we are for this season - we'll probably still move next Spring - so maybe it's better to do that now? And - is our current team stable? What if we keep losing girls?

But change is very hard on me - and on my dd. And I do feel intimidated about joining such a huge gym. Scares me a bit, I guess.

 

[kidzmom3]

my girls cheer for a small gym in New England. It can be frustrating when you see the level 4 and above gyms from the Mega gyms. However, we switched and went to the big one near us, East Elite and it just wasn't for them. They have many good points and are clearly great at what they do. but the personality mix, was not good for my daughters. Do I sometimes wish they would like it at the better, bigger gym? yes. Do I think that the big gym is more organized and up front? yes. Would they tumble better if they went there? probably yes. But the bottom line, they were unhappy.

 

[donnajon]

Does your DD already have her uniform? I might think about moving if I had to buy another uniform anyway rather than get one for this year and another for the other team next year. And, with the new gym only five miles away, you would save yourself time and gas. If you practice three times a week (including tumbling) like we do, that would be a huge savings on gas. So that might offset the gym. Maybe your DD could attend a practice and see how she feels then. Our gym just split. We were at a gymnastics facility and the coach opened her own cheer gym. She said she has done it several times with a gymnastics facility and it has never worked for her. The cheerleaders always get pushed out of the way of the gymnasts. Good luck on your decisions.
And we are going to CheerSport and Spirit of Hope as well. Loved Spirit of Hope!

 

[addicted2dizney]

Thank you so very much for replying.

According to my DD - this is her sport - and she wants to someday be level 5 and maybe even make it to college cheer. Now having said that - she has to work HARD for her tumbling skills - she's been working a back tuck for a while and isn't ready. But she is a good flyer - and she loves stunting.

The larger cheer gym has 3 facilities. They just opened a branch gym near our house - 5 miles away - so we'd go there to start. The "mother ship" gym of theirs is about 35 min. south of us. So, for example, when they go for clinics or camp - they'll go to the main BIG gym. But for regular practice, they'd practice at the satellite close to our home. Meanwhile, our current gym is a 30 minute drive in the opposite direction.

It is a huge jump financially - that's to be sure. That worries me a bit. I just wonder if we stay where we are for this season - we'll probably still move next Spring - so maybe it's better to do that now? And - is our current team stable? What if we keep losing girls?

But change is very hard on me - and on my dd. And I do feel intimidated about joining such a huge gym. Scares me a bit, I guess.

I agree with the above poster that you can save time and gas money at the new gym. That is a plus for me. Can you fundraise to offset costs for the new program? will you have purchase a new uniform this year at your gym anyway? Do you have any friends at the new gym that can give you some feedback? I am always a bit cynical to people's feedback who have left "before me" because I believe they will paint the picture rosy no matter what. As long as you ask the right questions and read between the lines you can get a good feel of things. Also, consider going there without your child and just observe the gym in motion.. see how the waiting area is, how the practices are conducted, how the kids are reacting to the practices.. do they have smiles on their faces?? Are the parents generally happy? Is there a lot of "complaining going on"? You can start to gather information and then make a decision.
Does your child have a desire to go to the larger gym? Being it's close to your home does she have classmates that are there? That can alleviate the worry of the bigger gym as well. Also keep in mind that many smaller programs put it in our minds that we will just be a number at the big gyms.. I'm not saying it's right but I see it happen all the time.

 

[mygirlkristi]

will you have purchase a new uniform this year at your gym anyway? Do you have any friends at the new gym that can give you some feedback? I am always a bit cynical to people's feedback who have left "before me" because I believe they will paint the picture rosy no matter what. As long as you ask the right questions and read between the lines you can get a good feel of things. Also, consider going there without your child and just observe the gym in motion.. see how the waiting area is, how the practices are conducted, how the kids are reacting to the practices.. do they have smiles on their faces?? Are the parents generally happy? Is there a lot of "complaining going on"? You can start to gather information and then make a decision.
Does your child have a desire to go to the larger gym? Being it's close to your home does she have classmates that are there? That can alleviate the worry of the bigger gym as well. Also keep in mind that many smaller programs put it in our minds that we will just be a number at the big gyms.. I'm not saying it's right but I see it happen all the time.

Her uniform is fine for this season. We don't need to buy one unless we switch gyms. I am quite afraid of her just being "a number" at the big gym - it really worries me. She will only know one girl at the other team - and she just switched over herself. So, no, she won't know a lot of the girls. And too - they travel quite a bit for comps - so I kind of tend to think that whatever we'll save in gas money - we'll spend anyway traveling to comps. Our current team does only smaller, local comps. But that's one reason my dd is considering the move - she likes the idea of doing bigger competitions.

And I DO find that the cheer team is often pushed aside at our gym! The poster who said that is right. Our current team is always shoved onto the smaller spring floor - and the gymnasts get the best times and space. It really is aggravating.

We're still talking about what to do. I just find myself scared of the change. I know that probably sounds really silly - it's only cheerleading. But it is a big commitment and a large part of our lives. You all know what I mean.

 

[goofy!]

Her uniform is fine for this season. We don't need to buy one unless we switch gyms. I am quite afraid of her just being "a number" at the big gym - it really worries me. She will only know one girl at the other team - and she just switched over herself. So, no, she won't know a lot of the girls. And too - they travel quite a bit for comps - so I kind of tend to think that whatever we'll save in gas money - we'll spend anyway traveling to comps. Our current team does only smaller, local comps. But that's one reason my dd is considering the move - she likes the idea of doing bigger competitions.

And I DO find that the cheer team is often pushed aside at our gym! The poster who said that is right. Our current team is always shoved onto the smaller spring floor - and the gymnasts get the best times and space. It really is aggravating.

We're still talking about what to do. I just find myself scared of the change. I know that probably sounds really silly - it's only cheerleading. But it is a big commitment and a large part of our lives. You all know what I mean.

My girls cheer at a medium to slightly larger gym. Last year they fielded 11 teams, this year there are 16.

Each gym is different, but we have never felt like a number. Our owners make a point of being very involved, so it still stays personal. The gym is becoming more successful and there is a huge sense of pride being part of the program.

While there are often some pitfalls of a larger gym, there are also some great perks.

One of the perks of being in a medium/large gym is that at competitions there are so many parents to cheer for you. In our gym (don't know how it is at others) at our local competitions, our parents take up a huge section of the viewing area and they cheer every single team that comes out on the floor. At our away competitions, teams are assigned to go support the other teams depending on schedules. So, not only do you cheer for your child's team, but you will be assigned to go support one or two more, always ensuring that each team has a large support group in the audience. It is exciting for the athletes to see the sea of yellow in the stands and see/hear a large group of parents waving towels and chanting the gym cheer for you. This really keeps if from feeling like you are a number because the whole gym supports each other.

Also, traveling to the bigger competitions has really pushed the teams skill wise. To see and experience the best of what the country has to offer really makes a difference in the skill level of the team.

 

[addicted2dizney]

Her uniform is fine for this season. We don't need to buy one unless we switch gyms. I am quite afraid of her just being "a number" at the big gym - it really worries me. She will only know one girl at the other team - and she just switched over herself. So, no, she won't know a lot of the girls. And too - they travel quite a bit for comps - so I kind of tend to think that whatever we'll save in gas money - we'll spend anyway traveling to comps. Our current team does only smaller, local comps. But that's one reason my dd is considering the move - she likes the idea of doing bigger competitions.

And I DO find that the cheer team is often pushed aside at our gym! The poster who said that is right. Our current team is always shoved onto the smaller spring floor - and the gymnasts get the best times and space. It really is aggravating.

We're still talking about what to do. I just find myself scared of the change. I know that probably sounds really silly - it's only cheerleading. But it is a big commitment and a large part of our lives. You all know what I mean.

I certainly do know and understand how big of a decision this is! Unfortunately I had a bad experience leaving my old gym.. keep in mind that when I joined the gym they had over 200+ athletes and by the time I left last May they were down to about 45 kids! some of which were new to the program so they didn't know any better.
Does your current gym have and "open door" policy? The gym I am at now does. People have chosen to leave our program for the mega gym down the street., (keep in mind we are a medium size program) many are happy there but many have chosen to come back. Because our owners are such wonderful people they keep the door open and any who leave are always welcome back. It's great business as well as the "right" way to be.
Perhaps you can discuss some of the things that you/your child would like to get out of a season.. practice closer to home, chance to travel more.. etc.

If you can gracefully bow out and be welcome back next year if it's not what you want, I would go for it! However, if your gym is run like a natzi camp, (mine old one was!) I would run not matter what your reasons to stay or go may be. I hope you don't mind my constant responses to you. It's just that I truly understand how agonizing this decision can be. I was literally on sleeping pills for a week I was so upset with my choices. That's what a hold on me the old gym had. I had no idea how manipulated I had been until I got out and stopped "drinking the kool aid" as we said!
It was the best thing I ever did leaving there. My child is on a team that is competitive in a safe, healthy enviornment. She knew people there and made new friends too. Being the new gym is close by I'm sure arranging play dates and sleep overs should be easy so she can make new friends quickly.

 

[N&B'smom]

First time cheer mom here. I feel like a fish out of water, don't even understand all the terminology used in this thread so far....must be cheer speak.

My DD just turned 6 today and this is her first attempt at cheering. She had cheer camp all week a couple weeks ago and her first two practices this past week. It's just for our town's football team.

Just wanted to say hi!

 

[goofy!]

First time cheer mom here. I feel like a fish out of water, don't even understand all the terminology used in this thread so far....must be cheer speak.

My DD just turned 6 today and this is her first attempt at cheering. She had cheer camp all week a couple weeks ago and her first two practices this past week. It's just for our town's football team.

Just wanted to say hi!

And join the club. This is our 5th season and I still don't know all the terminology.

 

[mygirlkristi]

First time cheer mom here. I feel like a fish out of water, don't even understand all the terminology used in this thread so far....must be cheer speak.

My DD just turned 6 today and this is her first attempt at cheering. She had cheer camp all week a couple weeks ago and her first two practices this past week. It's just for our town's football team.

Just wanted to say hi!

Welcome! I hope you and your DD love the cheer world!

 

[mygirlkristi]

I hope you don't mind my constant responses to you. It's just that I truly understand how agonizing this decision can be. I was literally on sleeping pills for a week I was so upset with my choices. That's what a hold on me the old gym had. I had no idea how manipulated I had been until I got out and stopped "drinking the kool aid" as we said!

I appreciate so much the responses to my problem - thank you all. I feel a lot like you did - really anxious. I too have had trouble sleeping and when I do sleep - I dream about cheerleading. Something's got to give - I have to make a decision.

 

[goofy!]

We finally got our competition schedule.

No Cheersport this year for us - Only the senior coed 5 team is going.

But....the whole gym is headed to Dallas! Should be fun.

Anybody else going to NCA?

 

[polkadotminnie]

Where is everyone else going for Nationals? When does everyone start competing? It is going to be interesting to see if Swine Flu affects the number and teams competing. I know the economy will impact things. My DD7 decided to cheer again. She is on the level 1 team. DD10 is on level 3.
I am looking forward to seeing all the talent of the teams out there!!!

 

[goofy!]

Where is everyone else going for Nationals? When does everyone start competing? It is going to be interesting to see if Swine Flu affects the number and teams competing. I know the economy will impact things. My DD7 decided to cheer again. She is on the level 1 team. DD10 is on level 3.
I am looking forward to seeing all the talent of the teams out there!!!

As I mentioned, our whole gym is going to NCA in Dallas. Then various other teams are going to Cheersport, Spirit Sports in Palm Springs, American Showcase in Anaheim and a possibly one or two other places, like Worlds

The rest of our stuff is local.

Congrats that your dd decided to cheer again. Where are you guys headed?

 

[missypie]

D13 has started to cheer on a competitive team but is also on her 8th grade school team. The school team has 16 girls - 4 stunt groups of 4. D's flyer has developed a fear of flying. I guess last year she didn't like it but this year she has refused to do it. The coaches have said that's okay, as long as she flies for competiton.

SO, during the games and pep rallies, when the other three groups are stunting, D's group is just standing there.

Would you intervene andor say something to the coaches? The bases in D's group are missing out on all kinds of stunting practice and experiences. The flyer is scared. Shouldn't they just get a different flyer? There aren't any other girls as short as the scared one, but there are several really thin girls who probably weigh less than she does.

Advice?

 

[kidzmom3]

D13 has started to cheer on a competitive team but is also on her 8th grade school team. The school team has 16 girls - 4 stunt groups of 4. D's flyer has developed a fear of flying. I guess last year she didn't like it but this year she has refused to do it. The coaches have said that's okay, as long as she flies for competiton.

SO, during the games and pep rallies, when the other three groups are stunting, D's group is just standing there.

Would you intervene andor say something to the coaches? The bases in D's group are missing out on all kinds of stunting practice and experiences. The flyer is scared. Shouldn't they just get a different flyer? There aren't any other girls as short as the scared one, but there are several really thin girls who probably weigh less than she does.

Advice?

contrary to popular belief the flyer does not need to be tiny. Especially in the 8th grade when the girls are getting closer to their adult size. A good flyer cannot be afraid. You could have a private conversation with the coach, but be prepared to not like the answer. Cheer is funny about stunt groups and have found that if you question anything, they think you are complaining and you become one of those.

 

[mygirlkristi]

Would you intervene andor say something to the coaches? The bases in D's group are missing out on all kinds of stunting practice and experiences. The flyer is scared. Shouldn't they just get a different flyer? There aren't any other girls as short as the scared one, but there are several really thin girls who probably weigh less than she does.

Advice?

This sounds just plain odd to me. Not only are the bases missing out on experience - but the flyer also won't have the experience she needs heading into competition. It's just not fair to anyone. It seems to me that it would be best to put in another flyer at this point. The main thing for fliers is flexibility and strength - it's not all about being tiny, as someone else mentioned. I would definitely say something if I were you. I mean - I know we all hate to intervene with coaches - but I think it's important to ask questions when your dd's best interest is at stake! Let us know what happens.

 

[addicted2dizney]

D13 has started to cheer on a competitive team but is also on her 8th grade school team. The school team has 16 girls - 4 stunt groups of 4. D's flyer has developed a fear of flying. I guess last year she didn't like it but this year she has refused to do it. The coaches have said that's okay, as long as she flies for competiton.

SO, during the games and pep rallies, when the other three groups are stunting, D's group is just standing there.

Would you intervene andor say something to the coaches? The bases in D's group are missing out on all kinds of stunting practice and experiences. The flyer is scared. Shouldn't they just get a different flyer? There aren't any other girls as short as the scared one, but there are several really thin girls who probably weigh less than she does.

Advice?

I would ask about it, however one of the big no-no's in cheering is discussing another child with the coach. I would make the focus on the fact that your daughter is frustrated with the current situation and feels like less of a team member watching all the other groups go up in stunts. She doesn't understand why her group is being penalized like this and that she is missing out on the experience of actually cheering. If the coach explains that the girl is afraid to fly, then you can ask if they have tried others or can your child's group be changed. Sometimes the answers are very interesting that you get from the coach. Perhaps it may be the stunt group as a whole is having some trouble and that's why the girl is scared to fly. I do agree it's odd to have them stand there. Is this an experienced coach? Has she done anything more than just coach a middle school team?