13.1 Before I Hit 40 - Running my 1st 1/2 Marathon at Disney uptd 09/30

[If U Had Wings]

OK, I'm with you on that...I totally understand the feeling. Just know that I and a lot of your friends here know it takes a lot of guts just to start a race like that. (I don't think I could do it.) Don't stress it, give it what you got...finish or not. We'll be rooting for you from afar.
(Emoticon that looks most like me - notice the bald head and glasses.)

I'll be thinking of all of you as I'm out there. I'll be putting in my best effort no matter what.

I think that's a great attitude. Maybe if you refocus on that it'll help the intimidating feeling you're getting from the race. Maybe look at it this way - commit to yourself to finish, say, a certain number of miles successfully. Anything after that is a bonus!

That's a good idea. All I can do is the best I'm capable of right? That's what I'll be trying to do, and not beat myself up over the results if they aren't medal worthy.

Every once in a while this creeps up on me and gives m BIG TIME anxiety too. I SO hear you. I've been doing some longer walks (7 mi. this Saturday coming) but I don't push my pace, I just focus on the distance...which means I average just under a 20 min. mile. Not good considering the race pace requirements. But, I figure I'll focus on that in the next section of my training where I actually start some running.

I've been averaging just under 17 minute miles. That one day were I thought I was going to die, and thought I was crawling home, I finally checked my ipod for my speed and was a bit shocked to see that I had still somehow managed to walk around 20/21 minute miles. It felt so much worse. I need to manage my breathing a bit better to sneak in some more running.

You'll be fine, honey. If you can wrap your head around letting it all go and just having fun and doing the best you can, I think a big part of the 'letdown' you're feeling about this trip will disappear. I do know, however, how hard that is to do.

Thanks. I know I'm my own worst enemy when it comes to being hard on myself. Hopefully once I'm down there that Disney magic will work it's wonders on me.

I am so sorry that you aren't looking forward to the trip!

Have you thought about switching to the 5k race? It is not a half marathon, but it is a race and perhaps you can transfer your place? I did this in 2009 with a 10k I signed up for and ran the 5k instead because I got scared. At first I was feeling bad about it, but then I really enjoyed running a race that I knew I could be comfortable with. And I agree with everyone else: if the race is just this huge stone around your neck, just get rid of it, whatever the financial consequences are!!

That is a possibility, but I am supposed to be doing this with a friend. She and I are at very similar fitness levels, so this is really a challenge for her as well. I want to be there to put the effort in with her.

I'm trying to remember that this is just one night of my trip. One night very early in my trip, and I'll have the whole week after that to forget about it.


Hopefully my nieces will be down visiting my mom and dad this weekend. (I live about 2 miles away from my parents). I could use some good quality niece hugs and laughs. It's really amazing what those things can do for you.

 

[Tinkerbellarella]

Hopefully my nieces will be down visiting my mom and dad this weekend. (I live about 2 miles away from my parents). I could use some good quality niece hugs and laughs. It's really amazing what those things can do for you.

SO. TRUE.

I talked to my godson last night on the phone. He's three and just started preschool. I haven't gotten to talk to him since he started and to hear that little voice last night...sigh...just makes my heart melt.

And to hear, "I miss you Deeda. I love you."

(He calls me Deeda, instead of Dina, which is a slang term for the Portuguese word for Godmother.)

 

[If U Had Wings]

SO. TRUE.

I talked to my godson last night on the phone. He's three and just started preschool. I haven't gotten to talk to him since he started and to hear that little voice last night...sigh...just makes my heart melt.

And to hear, "I miss you Deeda. I love you."

(He calls me Deeda, instead of Dina, which is a slang term for the Portuguese word for Godmother.)

They don't have to do much do they? My nieces call me Missy or Mis Mis and I'm just putty in their hands when they do. My brother also taught my youngest niece the evil trick of saying "You would if you loved me" while batting her eyes to get me to do things. Evil! I have no power to resist.

...not that I want to resist, but they don't need to know I have to will to fight back.

 

[TyRy]

Just wanted to say I hope the new loan goes smoothly this time. And with regards to the race, I think I agree with a couple of others that maybe just do what you can. Every mile you go is an accomplishment, even if you do not finish the race. Maybe look at it as an adventure, Disney in the dark without a lot of people around. Could you make a fun time out of it by having a small camera and taking pictures every mile you accomplish? Or by some of your favorite landmarks?

Totally understand about everything hitting at once and not looking forward to the trip. I think once you get there, take a breath, soak in that Disney air, you'll feel better, at least for a bit.

 

[TarzansKat]

Wings, I know I never mentioned this before, but I just wanted to give you a warm fuzzy if possible.

I talked to my mom about all my DIS friends, and I would usually refer to you by your DIS names, so when you started this pre trip report, I told her about how you were going to run the marathon because it was something you wanted to do for yourself.

Wings, she didn't even know you and she was so proud of you. I know she'd agree with Tink that whatever goal you set for yourself, you should be proud of, and if it's not the whole marathon, so be it. You've said before that you're not really a runner, that you've never done this before. Isn't it reasonable to expect that the first time you run a marathon it may not be heaven and perfection?

We're all works in progress. We're all working towards a higher goal. You'll get to wherever you need to be, and we'll all be proud of you, my mom included.

 

[If U Had Wings]

Just wanted to say I hope the new loan goes smoothly this time. And with regards to the race, I think I agree with a couple of others that maybe just do what you can. Every mile you go is an accomplishment, even if you do not finish the race. Maybe look at it as an adventure, Disney in the dark without a lot of people around. Could you make a fun time out of it by having a small camera and taking pictures every mile you accomplish? Or by some of your favorite landmarks?

Totally understand about everything hitting at once and not looking forward to the trip. I think once you get there, take a breath, soak in that Disney air, you'll feel better, at least for a bit.

I'm going to do my best to just focus on one mile at at time. I'm hoping being surrounded my other people will help. Parts of my training have gotten a bit dull with no one around to share the experience with. I do have an older digital camera that I might bring along with me. It's one of those teeny ones and would be easy to bring along. Thanks for the reminder that I need to do my best to enjoy this.

Wings, I know I never mentioned this before, but I just wanted to give you a warm fuzzy if possible.

I talked to my mom about all my DIS friends, and I would usually refer to you by your DIS names, so when you started this pre trip report, I told her about how you were going to run the marathon because it was something you wanted to do for yourself.

Wings, she didn't even know you and she was so proud of you. I know she'd agree with Tink that whatever goal you set for yourself, you should be proud of, and if it's not the whole marathon, so be it. You've said before that you're not really a runner, that you've never done this before. Isn't it reasonable to expect that the first time you run a marathon it may not be heaven and perfection?

We're all works in progress. We're all working towards a higher goal. You'll get to wherever you need to be, and we'll all be proud of you, my mom included.

Thanks TK! That means so much to me. I keep forgetting that for me to even try this is is so far beyond what I would normally do. A natural athlete I am not. I really need to make my goal to do the best that I can do.

 

[TarzansKat]

Thanks TK! That means so much to me. I keep forgetting that for me to even try this is is so far beyond what I would normally do. A natural athlete I am not. I really need to make my goal to do the best that I can do.

Exactly right! Anything that you accomplish is beyond your norm, and therefore should be celebrated!

Champagne in France anyone?

 

[Tinkerbellarella]

Champagne in France anyone?

 

[If U Had Wings]

Exactly right! Anything that you accomplish is beyond your norm, and therefore should be celebrated!

Champagne in France anyone?

Of course, amoung other places afterwards that's for sure!

 

[TarzansKat]

Of course, amoung other places afterwards that's for sure!

 

[If U Had Wings]

Yesterday I felt good for the first time in ages. Not just okay, or my usual blah, but good. Pretty good actually. I don't know why. Maybe it was getting out for a walk in the beautiful weather yesterday. Maybe it was the surprise phone call from my nieces the day before. Whatever it was I was greatful. I can't tell you how good it felt to not feel like I was about to break down in tears at any given moment. I could feel the difference just walking to and from my car. There was, not be too overly dramatic, a spring in my step that's been missing for awhile now. I went to my Zumba class for the first time in a few weeks, and while I was a bit lost on all the new songs I've missed I didn't feel like I was dragging through the workout. It felt good. I feel more energized. It seems to have carried over to today so I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I can keep this up.

Minor panic attacks over the race, by yours truly not withstanding, I am doing my best to be sure the plans for this trip are going along as smooth as possible. I may have bordered on a bit of a breakdown when talking to the BFF I'm going on this trip with. I had called her to let her know what the balance on the trip was going to be and she wanted to know how much she should budget for food. I asked if she had even taken a look at any of the menus I had e-mailed her. (You know - so she could be sure she liked them, and come up with a budget). Nope. Hadn't taken a peak.

A small part of me wanted to scream a little bit, but I let it slide and just told her what I was budgeting. Honestly though, I did all the planning, is it really that difficult to just take a quick look over the menus? This trip if she tells me at all that she didn't really like a place we've been to before I am not knocking myself out to try to replace it. I did that last trip and I'm not doing it again. Kind of the you snooze you lose mentality.

I talked to her again yesterday to find out where she wanted me to send her luggage tag and she had just realized that she hadn't purchased her Universal tickets. Maybe I should be glad I'm doing the planning.

As far as the other trip plans are going I think I'm pretty much all set. The basics are taken care of - rooms, airfare, transfers, ADRs and tickets. The new memory card I ordered arrived at my door in about two days, so I'm set and ready to take plenty of pictures. I pulled the clothes I'm planning on bringing with me aside, since now that the weather is cooling off a bit I can get by without using them until the trip. I'll just have to iron some of them before packing them up.

I did cave and order myself the bathing suit. I was holding out strong for a long time, and then them posted a sale on Facebook. Your entire order 20% off. I think I wavered for all of 30 seconds before ordering. Yes it's money that could be being spent more productively, but I really, really wanted it. I'm thinking of it as my birthday present to myself. You only turn 40 once, right?

I have a small list of things I need to take care of before I go -

Color hair - This needs to be done pretty desperately at this point, but I'm trying to hold out on doing it until next weekend.
Purchase last few toiletries - I need some shampoo, spray deoderant (for my legs) and regular deoderant
Go to bank for cash
Get roll of quarters/pennies

Not too bad right? There is a Wally world on the way home from the gym, so I'm going to try to stop on my way home from Zumba tonight to pick up those last things.

I do have a few luggage issues to sort out. I have to figure out which carry on bag I want to take with me. I have one with wheels, like a mini-suitcase, and an over the shoulder personal tote style one. I've always used the wheeled one, but I find fitting it into the overhead rack on Jet Blue to be a bit of a squeeze. I've never had any problems with it on Air Tran, but on Jet Blue it's a bit more difficult - especially on the smaller plane I'll be travelling down on with 4 seats per row. Normally I can fit my stuff into the tote bag with no problems, I did that in March, but this time I have to carry all my running gear in my carry on to be sure I have it. I'm not sure everything will fit. (Those sneakers take up quite a bit of room). I'm going to have to test it out, as I'd much rather just take the smaller bag. My seat on the plane is in row 5, so I'll be one of the last ones on the plane (but first off! ), I don't want to have to worry about them taking the bigger bag away from me at the gate. It's also so much more freeing to just have the one bag tossed over my shoulder. Ahhh! I'll have to go online and see what the seating is looking like. If I have to take the larger bag, maybe I'll just suck it up and move my seat to the back of the plane. At least you sometimes end up with a bit more room back there.

I also realized this morning that I had tossed my toiletries bag after the March trip because it was disintergrating. I'm thinking I can borrow one from my folks or my brother though. I may stop at the LL Bean outlet just to check and see if they have any discounted ones. Lastly I need to go on a search mission in my room for my travel orgainzier. I can't seem to remember where in the world I left it after my last trip. I checked in the suitcase, but there was nothing there. Hmmmm where could it be?

 

[MRYPPNS]

Sounds like things are moving along in the right direction!! Glad you are feeling better....keep exercising and eating good and you should keep this new happier mojo!!

I'm a bit disappointed with your friend not looking at the menus but asking what to budget. Just casually let her know this weekend that you have no plans to change the ADRs once you are at Disney. Takes the pressure off of you and puts some responsiblity on her.

Hope you have some flashy new flip flops to go with your new suit!

 

[Tinkerbellarella]

Darn it. I LOVE that suit. ::sigh::

Glad to hear you're feeling a bit more yourself, girlie.

 

[skier_pete]

A small part of me wanted to scream a little bit, but I let it slide and just told her what I was budgeting. Honestly though, I did all the planning, is it really that difficult to just take a quick look over the menus? This trip if she tells me at all that she didn't really like a place we've been to before I am not knocking myself out to try to replace it. I did that last trip and I'm not doing it again. Kind of the you snooze you lose mentality.

I'm so glad to hear you're feeling more up! Good for you!

I can see how your BFF must drive you crazy...it's seems she won't participate in the planning, but then when she doesn't like the plans she gets all pouty and tries to guilt you into changing them! I got another rhyming phrase you could use if she does that again...too bad, so sad!

Here's hoping your mood continues to stay bright and sunny. (Looks like we might have a nice weekend coming up!)

SP

 

[If U Had Wings]

I'm a bit disappointed with your friend not looking at the menus but asking what to budget. Just casually let her know this weekend that you have no plans to change the ADRs once you are at Disney. Takes the pressure off of you and puts some responsiblity on her.

I told her that already. (In what I think was a very nice way). I like to think I'm pretty patient, but even I have my limits. I'm not letting things like this ruin my trip this time.

Hope you have some flashy new flip flops to go with your new suit!

I actually own a pair of sparkly pink and rhinestorne flip flops that would be perfect with that suit. They were an ebay find ages ago. They aren't terribly comfortable, but for hanging out by a pool they'll be great.

Darn it. I LOVE that suit. ::sigh::

Glad to hear you're feeling a bit more yourself, girlie.

Thanks! It feels like a weight has been lifted off of me. I knew I was feeling bad, but I don't know if I realized how bad until I actually felt good. I feel ready to take on things. I just want it to last.

I really couldn't resist the suit. I ended up getting the pink. The colors I liked most didn't come in the largest size, and I was right on the cusp between sizes. I wanted to be sure that it would be okay so I went with a color that came in the larger size. Even though I'm not usually a pinky girl I do like this one. It should be here tomorrow. I can't wait.

I'm so glad to hear you're feeling more up! Good for you!

I can see how your BFF must drive you crazy...it's seems she won't participate in the planning, but then when she doesn't like the plans she gets all pouty and tries to guilt you into changing them! I got another rhyming phrase you could use if she does that again...too bad, so sad!

Here's hoping your mood continues to stay bright and sunny. (Looks like we might have a nice weekend coming up!)

SP

My BFF and I have known each other for awhile now, and I have always known that she has zero interest in planning anything. (She always jokes that if she gets married someday she's letting me and another friend of ours plan it). I guess I just never knew the depths to which she dislikes planning. For the most part I don't mind doing it, I just wish she'd give a little more feedback sometimes.

I like the too bad, too sad. I'm going to have to remember to use that one.

 

[aprilisis]

YAY! I'm so happy you're feeling better! I think it is awesome that you bought that bathing suit- it rocks & it will look great on you.

 

[If U Had Wings]

YAY! I'm so happy you're feeling better! I think it is awesome that you bought that bathing suit- it rocks & it will look great on you.

Thanks. I can't wait for it to arrive today. I feel like a little kid waiting for Christmas morning.

Day 3 of feeling pretty good, and that's with crazy nonsense driving me a bit nuts. So far so good.

 

[TarzansKat]

Glad you're feeling better and things are looking up!

 

[If U Had Wings]

Last night I had intended on heading over to the gym when I got home from work, but a stop or two before my train got home, it started pouring. By the time I got off the train there was a torrential downpour going on, and the rain was pelting down at all kinds of strange angles. The heavy rain was so hard and so sudden that all the storm drains were backed up and couldn't handle water. The walk from the train station to my car is about 5-10 minutes, but last night it was crazy. On some of the roads and sidewalks I was wading through ankle deep water, and when I got to my car the lot was so flooded that the water surrounding my car was hitting me mid to high calf. I think the water was about a half inch or so away from the bottom of my car door. I had my umbrella, but by the time I got to my car the only part of me that was dry was my head. Everything else I was wringing water out of.

Needless to say I didn't make it to the gym. I didn't think sloshing around on the studio floor would have been terribly appreciated. I did head over to the drug store to pick up a few things for my trip, but I guess I was distracted by the fact that I was squeaking embarrassingly around the store and forgot a few things. I'll have to head back again tonight.

I've been doing a little bit of thinking about doing some pin trading this trip. I always pick up a few pins as souveniers, but I've never traded any as I'd be loathe to give up any of my precious pins. I ordered a few pins off of ebay last night in case I do decide to do some trading so I won't have to give up any of mine. I still don't know if I'll do it, but I like having that option. Plus you never know if you see someone with a really neat pin you just have to have.

Unbelievably two weeks from today I'll be in Disney. Tomorrow is my last really long run - 10 miles. I don't know what is a bit scarier - that I have to do 10 miles tomorrow, or that there is a 3 mile gap before the marathon. I'm trying not to drive myself too nuts about it, and focus on the fact that after I do my 10 miles tomorrow morning I'm heading up to stay over night with my nieces. I usually do my long runs on Sunday, but there is no way I'm running in my brother's neighborhood. It's all huge hills. Nope. Not going to happen.

And finally, I think I'm starting to stalk the mail guy today. Swimsuit hasn't arrived yet. I feel like a little kid waiting for it.

 

[TarzansKat]

Good lord, that's a lot of water!

I want to wish you the best for you ten mile run. I know you can do it. Don't think about it being three miles short, think about it being ten miles longer than you've run before!