Minnie's Mate
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Aug 15, 2000
- Messages
- 1,310
My Momma raised me to never hit a girl or a woman and I've lived by that for 46 years. My Dad raised me to never cheat on my wife and I've lived by that rule for the nearly 20 years I've been married.
But the thing that has kept me faithful wasn't my Dad's prompting, it was the mayor of my hometown in South Georgia when I was in middle school, not the town I live in now. His wife caught him cheating on her so she got him drunk one night and super-glued his, uh, private member to his belly.
He had to go to a plastic surgeon in Savannah and have it cut loose and had to have skin grafts and stitches and every thing...shutter!
I remember that every time I hear, "Hell hath no furry..." or think of that man having to explain to the doctor how it got glued to his stomach in the first place or the consequences of a man getting caught cheating on his wife.
So there were two promises I made when I got married:
1) I'd never cheat on my wife;
2) I'd never let her get me drunk!
It just isn't worth it guys, it just isn't worth it!
But the thing that has kept me faithful wasn't my Dad's prompting, it was the mayor of my hometown in South Georgia when I was in middle school, not the town I live in now. His wife caught him cheating on her so she got him drunk one night and super-glued his, uh, private member to his belly.

I remember that every time I hear, "Hell hath no furry..." or think of that man having to explain to the doctor how it got glued to his stomach in the first place or the consequences of a man getting caught cheating on his wife.
So there were two promises I made when I got married:
1) I'd never cheat on my wife;
2) I'd never let her get me drunk!
It just isn't worth it guys, it just isn't worth it!