Weight loss surgery - does anyone REALLY need it?

[Luv Bunnies]

I had someone come up to me at the Magic Kingdom, and tell me how great Weight Watchers is! I guess she saw this fat chick sitting outside of a shop and thought she would "help"

I was shocked and had to put it out of my head so it didn't ruin my day.

Some people have nerve! A former co-worker of mine attended a conference where her boyfriend was making a presentation on how to live longer. He approached a man on the beach and told him he should attend his talk and learn why the 40 extra pounds he was carrying would lead to an early death. The man said no thanks, he wasn't interested. My co-worker couldn't believe the guy declined. After all, he was 40 pounds overweight! I pointed out that perhaps the guy used to be 140 pounds overweight and was well into his weight loss journey. She said, "I doubt it." But there's no way she could have known. It's pretty nervy to approach people and pass judgment on them when you have no idea who they are and where they've been.

Kudos to you for not letting the creep ruin your day!

 

[dansamy]

You are right. Cycles need to be broken, but if cycles were easily broken we wouldn't have a lot of the issues we have as a society. Cycles are cycles for a reason. If mom is overweight, depressed and in physical pain because of either or both, going out to run around with jimmy isn't going to happen. Not because she is a crappy mom or less evolved than you but because that is just too much. It is a mess too large for the dis for certain.

This. We live in a society filed with broken people. Broken people aren't able to maintain healthy relationships, whether that is with food, alcohol, drugs or other people. While Jane's relationship with people or alcohol may appear to be functioning well & appropriately, her relationship with food may be severely dysfunctional. Or vice versa. There are a multitude of reasons why we have an increasing number of individuals who are broken. Perpetuating cycles is only one piece of the puzzle, although it is significant.

 

[snarlingcoyote]

I had someone come up to me at the Magic Kingdom, and tell me how great Weight Watchers is! I guess she saw this fat chick sitting outside of a shop and thought she would "help"

I was shocked and had to put it out of my head so it didn't ruin my day.

I was a WW leader for a while. Some people who get into WWers make it into a religion, and they can have all the fervor of a new convert who wants to save the world. Just think of that person as being involved in a cult - not that WW wants its members to be like that or encourages it, quite the opposite, but some folks do take it that way.

That woman probably spoke to everyone who was 5lbs or more overweight that she thought looked approachable about the Word of Weight Watchers, because she thought she was doing them a favor to help them save themselves.

Yeah, she was rude and obnoxious and socially clueless, but it wasn't about YOU, it was about HER. Put her out of your mind. You were just a spear carrier in her little self-absorbed drama about saving the world from the dangers of being over goal weight. (Which, now that I've said it out loud, makes me kind of want to kick her ever lovin' little WW bottom into next week for being such a self-absorbed twit.)

And on behalf of everyone who does or has done WWer and ever once gone overboard with it, I really do apologize for her and for her actions. This woman could only see people's weights and not the people.

 

[gometros]

Absolutely. The Lapband seems different because a person MUST make good choices.

I can't imagine the deluxe dining plan and eating big rich meals everyday for the life of me. Frankly id be sick.

Sadly, there are banders who when they know they're going on vacation, get their band loosened, so they are less restricted. For those of us who sick to the plan or have had any of the bypass surgeries, I can tell you from experience that it is near impossible to eat the amount of food the DDP allows you to eat. We stopped using the DDP after I had the surgery. We do TiW and I usually order an appetizer s's my entrée.

No not true on good choices that is more with GBP. Lapband requires you to fill a resevoir to keep the stomach small. If you simply stop doing that it will return to normal. Also with LB you can eat any foods there is no body rejection like with GBP.

You could have a milkshake or BK or Ben & Jerrys with LB with GBP I would be, lets say indisposed for quite some time. After which I would feel like a had gone 10 rounds with Tyson, it exhaust you.

When we did WDW about 3 months post GBP I was allowed to order from kids menu or 1/2 portions. I actually had a chef come out to chat with me, his wife was thinking of doing it.

Both are choices and what works for one may not work for another. I do know LB people who have ended up going back for GBP because they need that jolt.

I had similar experiences with the chef. Disney is VERY accommodating when it comes to various dietary restrictions. We went to WDW a month after I had the surgery. A chef came to my table every night to discuss my needs. With restrictions like no more than 30 calories in condiments, no oils cooking and other such restrictions, I had some of the most delicious meals ever.

Addiction is addiction which is lack of control and all addictions need to be addressed. Directly and with respect.

That is over simplifying what addiction is and shows your lack of understanding and empathy. It is more than just a lack of control. It is a physical, mental or metabolical dependency.

Without a camera around my neck what is distinguishing me from someone who lives in NYC when I'm in a store or in a restaurant?

We natives can just tell. I work in the fashion district, which is right near Times Square. You just know.

 

[Granny square]

I don't see an issue with adjusting the band to life. She (my friend) had hers loosened when heading in vacation not so she could scarf but because it made it easier to deal with her meals. She keeps it pretty darn tight the majority of the time. She maintained rather than lost on vacation and I don't see that as a big deal.

 

[gometros]

I don't see an issue with adjusting the band to life. She (my friend) had hers loosened when heading in vacation not so she could scarf but because it made it easier to deal with her meals. She keeps it pretty darn tight the majority of the time. She maintained rather than lost on vacation and I don't see that as a big deal.

Yeah, I was probably sounding too judgemental there.

 

[Octoberbride03]

I work with someone who wanted to get gastric bypass, but she had to lose a certain amount before insurance would cover it. Like everything else in her life, she couldn't do it. She has no control over anything in her life. She's has financial problems, has issues with her young son, is late to work when she actually comes in, isn't responsible for anything, etc. She has excuses for EVERYTHING. She weighs almost 300 lbs but eats whatever she wants. She doesn't understand why her life is such a mess. It's pretty simple to those who see her daily. She has stunted emotional growth. She really never grew up. I need to lose about 30 lbs and I walk almost everyday, eat salads, fish, oatmeal, etc. She eats lots of things she shouldn't and never gets up from her desk if she doesn't have to. Her problems weren't done to her, even though she'd like to blame everything except herself. She's 48 and loves to tell everyone that her blood pressure is good, cholestorol is normal, etc. No one believes her. She lies about everything My point is, having seen someone who needs to lose weight, wants the surgery, etc, I see the reality. She is fooling herself. She needs to fix her life and then maybe she can work on the rest. Her parents and siblings are not overweight like she is. I just shake my head when I watch her eat. The fact is, she's sabotaging herself.

My advice is stop watching her eat. Just find something else to look at, because painful as it is ONLY SHE CAN FIX HER LIFE. You can't do it for her. My mom is huge herself and still goes on about how good her numbers are. And while i know that's true, I also know her 2 knee replacements hate her for the weight. But she still does nothing about it. I've lost about 90lbs myself without surgery or a program. It took a long time and I could still stand to lose more weight but what's left seems to be sticking. i wish my mom would at least try something, but she won't and that's that. I love her anyway and pray for her. That's all i can do.

People who are ready to lose weight will find a way that works for them. It doesn't matter what that way is. Everybody is different and there is no 1 size fits all approach to it.

 

[Granny square]

Blood pressure can be good when overweight because if you ten towards hypothyroidism your blood pressure tends to run low. And cholesterol tends to be associated with genetics as much as food consumption. So before you chalk her up to one big lie you new to understand that she may not be.

Aside from that lying and hiding are connected with most addictions. No reason this one woul be different.

 

[Granny square]

Yeah, I was probably sounding too judgemental there.

No worries. I've been working on an family issue and yakking here is keeping my mind busy on stuff that isn't my own. it is purely academical and I'm good with just discussing.

 

[minkydog]

Blood pressure can be good when overweight because if you ten towards hypothyroidism your blood pressure tends to run low. And cholesterol tends to be associated with genetics as much as food consumption. So before you chalk her up to one big lie you new to understand that she may not be.

.

Our bodies are so very complex. There's no explaining how my 112-lb SIL has type 2 diabetes--the ONLY one in the entire extended family--or why my skinny little step-dad had cholesterol in the 400s, even with medication *his brother was over 600!* While my 350-lb sister has BP of 110/70 and perfect cholesterol. She also has rheumatoid arthritis, passed down from my very slender grandfather. In my family, most of the women are heavy and most of the men are not. But we share equally in depression, thyroid disease, cancer, sleep apnea, and heart disease. Our bodies are strange and wondrous creations.

 

[gometros]

No worries. I've been working on an family issue and yakking here is keeping my mind busy on stuff that isn't my own. it is purely academical and I'm good with just discussing.

The DIS is a nice kind of distraction ;-)

 

[Granny square]

The DIS is a nice kind of distraction ;-)

It is! I love that you can just find current topics and jump in. Although I worry that I am too distracted sometimes.

 

[corgi_monster]

Is there truly anyone for whom diet and exercise won't work and therefore they have to have weight loss surgery in order to lose weight?
.

If you took 100 people who were 5'8" and 150 lbs and stuck them in an environment in which they ate the exact same food, had the exact same daily routine, and participated in the exact same exercises, would they all weigh exactly the same at the end of the experiment? Probably not.

This is not to say that there are some people who can only lose weight through surgery. I haven't been there so I don't know. The point is simply that everyone's body reacts differently, even if the situations are the same. And while I think the eating-healthy-and-exercise method works for most, I'm sure it doesn't work for all.

I think that most of us who are over 30 know that your body's metabolism and ability to gain/lose weight changes over the time. It's hard enough to understand and manage the fluctuations in my OWN body, nevermind trying to figure out why other people can or cannot lose weight

 

[cabmom]

I had a VSG or Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy in July 2009. I lost 90lbs in total.
I had a breast lift and tummy tuck July 2012 to complete my weight loss.
My stomach was reduced to 15%. I had many co-morbidities that affected my longevity. I tried many conventional diets. I have 4 boys, a busy life and made poor food choices.
This surgery is a tool and I work with it everyday! I hope I've added at least a good 10 yrs to my life.

 

[dansamy]

We can smell it on you, like tigers and their prey

Like folks who've moved to the Deep South & even had their children in the Deep South. "Just cuz the cat has kittens in the oven don't mean we're gonna call them biscuits." My husband has lived in Alabama for 30 years. When meeting locals for the first time, they eventually say "You're me from around here, are ya?"

 

[jbuey22]

I too am a Gastric Bypass patient. It literally saved my life. I was 500 lbs and made several trips to Disney including my last trip shortly after the operation where I needed to rent an ECV because of my weight and health issues. I am now 247lbs and this August will be the first trip to Disney in a Long Long Time that I am not gonna rent an ECV. Im not saying it will be easy with all of the walking, and I do still have other underlying issues with my knee replacement and asthma, as well as diabetes, that may tucker me out and rquire me to rent one from the park for a day or 2. But I am hoping that I will make it without one for the entire trip. I am working out and getting ready strengthening up with treadmill work and endurance workouts several times weekly. I did not have any complications to the surgery like I have heard about in these threads. BUT the difference I believe is that I did exactly what the doctors told me to do which is the key to these surgeries. Yes they are dangerous. My doctor told me there was a 0.5% fatality rate. Which does not seem large a half of a percent, but if you think about it that is 1 in every 200 surgeries. If you look at it that way it does not look good. But as I said the key is doing what the doctors tell you to do. The 1 in 200 deaths are not on the operating table, they are usually with complications afterwards when patients do not do what is recommended. Yes I have alot of hanging skin. initially when I was 500lbs I told my doctor that my goal was 250 lbs. He told me when I got to 275lbs to have the skin reduction surgery and the tummy tuck and that would eliminate another 25lbs to excess skinn and get me to my goal of 250. But sofar I have not had that surgery and I am already past my goal. So if and when I do have this surgery I should really be at about 220lbs which is what I look like now. I look like I weigh 220 but because of all of the excess skin I am actually still at 240 something. I wear normal clothes now and shop at normal stores. I dont shine my steering wheel with my belly when I drive my car. My cholesteral went from 230 to 140. My A1C went from 8.8 to 6.2 (diabetic blood sugar average). And yes I eat very little still. I have read in this thread about lap bands and sleeves and a few horror stories, and that is exactly what my doctor told me. Gastric Bypass is the way to go. It is irreversible and much better than the band or the sleeve, which both can be cheated on and abused. If I over eat I get sick literally and it is no fun. But other than that I really eat most of the same things that I used to with the exception of a few things which is different for each person. It saved my life, I wish I would have done it much sooner. I wore a size 62 pants and now I am down to 42 and even 40's and after the skin reduction I will be in 38's probably. I used to wear 6X everything. You know how much a 6X T-Shirt cost at the big and tall store. Now 2X and even 1X on some shirts. I needed the surgery REALLY I literally could not walk much let alone work out. Somebody I read was 300 some odd pounds and the surgery knocked them down to 170 thats great too but 300 for me wasnt the point I thought I needed the surgery. But if I had maybe I wouldnt have as much excess skin. Sorry about the brutal truth talk here but my last disney trip I was still pretty huge although I had started losing weight, I really didnt get to enjoy the parks and stuff with the ease I will this time. Looking forward to NOT needing extra seatbelts and stuff. Being comfortable on the airplane. (Thats a biggie) I have lost more than half of my weight starting at 500lbs it does work.

 

[Mickey'sMainMami]

I also had weight loss surgery and it was the best decision I ever made. Not everyone will be successful, but a lot of people will. Most of the people poo pooing the idea are people who have never had a weight problem before ever in their life, which is extremely annoying to me. What's the saying? Don't ever judge another man until you've walked in his shoes? It's always easy for others to judge, I have heard that I was lazy, that I had no self control, well not true. I worked out all the time, and I had enough self control to literally starve myself most of my life, but I could never keep it off. I eat incredibly healthy, just my portions were too big. I felt like I was always hungry and was just never full. I had the gastric sleeve which is much simpler than the bypass, and in 1 year I lost 105 pounds. I will never go back there again. I have learned portion control and am finally full, it was the best thing ever!

I watched my brother, my mom, my uncle and both grandparents battle their weight their entire lives. My mom probably lost and gained 800 pounds over the course of her life. She exercised probably 20+ hours a week as she was a dance teacher. She never bought fast food and never fried anything at home. It was always broiled chicken and steamed veggies. It was torture living with her because she never bought junk food. Yet any little small treat for her instantly added pounds. Sometimes it is just genetics and no matter how hard you try you just can't fight it.

So no sometimes diet, exercise and willpower aren't enough for some of us. Some of us do have an addiction to food, just like alcoholics and drug addicts. You mean if they came out with a surgery that would cure a heroin addict, you would tell them oh, just try willpower cuz that's all you need? Um no. No WLS is not a cure, but it is an incredible tool to help, and I am extremly grateful for it!

 

[AntePrincess]

In case it hasn't been said, I think being overweight and being diagnosed pre-diabetic, or any similar condition, would be a good enough reason to get weight loss surgery. I've watched my mother, my father, and all my aunts and uncles eat themselves into danger until they're warned that they are pre-diabetic and then most did nothing about it. My mother is the latest to be diagnosed pre-diabetic. Only my one aunt decided to fight it, and she went straight to weight loss surgery, she is no longer pre-diabetic and she's in the best shape of her life.

I don't think it's a substitute for learning to eat right and exercise, but once you're already in the danger zone every week counts until you've done irreparable damage to yourself. I've worked very hard to eat well and instill good habits in my family, and we seem to have dodged the bullet so far, but I would seek surgery if I ever found myself in that boat and I wish my mother would do it as well. It can buy you time to change your lifestyle.

 

[joeswife1109]

I'll share my story...

I am 34 years old. If you told me 10 years ago I would have had it I would have laughed in your face. But I did....a little over one year ago and it was THE best decision I ever made for myself. See, when I was pregnant with my son a little over 12 years ago issues in me that lay dormant came out, high blood pressure, sleep apnea, diabetes, you name it I had it. I gained weight and never kept it off. I tried for years to keep it off through better eating, exercise. I ended up having my daughter 3 years ago. Almost lost her...and me. I was a high risk pregnancy and had to take her by CSection 2 weeks early due to complications.

Trust me I tried everything. I was so sick and tired of being sick and tired. I had no energy, hated my life. I was miserable. I was getting up sick to my stomach each day. I had no clue why. Turns out I was diabetic. Did I want to go on insulin my whole life? Nope I sure didn't.

My husband's friend has the surgery 2 years ago. His whole life was transformed by it. My husband tried talking me into it. I fought him. Finally one day he said think about the kids. And I did.

April 17, 2012 I changed my life. From that day forward I have yet to be sick to my stomach in the morning. I went from 259 lbs to 140. A size 26 who could barely move to a size 4. I lucked out. I do have some excess skin but not much. I certainly had to change my lifestyle as far as foods. We ate healthy before but now we really eat healthy.

But the best part is that I will now be around to enjoy my kid's lives. I can run around with my 2 year old, keep up with my 12 year old. It's amazing the amount of energy I have. It wasn't a quick fix. Trust me. I had to really change my mind and my attitude on things and I have. But for me, it gave me my life back. As someone previously had said, my only regret was not doing it sooner.

 

[Caradana]

I just want to say that I find the people who do this to be brave and inspiring!