Dealing with The Loss of a Son

[pfishgirl]

Hugs Stacy,

Just happened to stumble across your thread today. I didn't even realize this part of the board even existed. I am so very sorry for your loss.

4 weeks ago today I lost my son too. He would have been 4 next month. He struggled with many health issues all his life, but his death was still so sudden and unexpected. He developed pneumonia and kidney failure. After an intense 2 day battle in PICU, Noah's brain was no longer functioning and we had to make the very painful decision to let him go. I feel your pain. To bury a child is just so very, very wrong. I struggle to make it through each day...and to somehow try to help my other kids through this all. But sometimes I can barely even breathe. It's so tough on our marriage too. Noah was my world. I hate that this is my new reality.

Stacy, you made it through 15 weeks. That gives me hope. For now all we can do is just take one day, one hour, one minute or even just one breath at a time, and we will make it through another day.

Oh my goodness.. I am so sorry for your loss Thank you for sharing your story with me..

It's very hard and we have good days and bad days and we do take it one hour at a time.. Some days I'm fine and then out of nowhere I'm crying my eyes out.

Tonight my husband says he is not all that thrilled we are going on our cruise in 2 weeks.. This is the 1st he has said anything to me.. I'm hoping he is just having a down day and I'll help try and perk him up

 

[TaraPA]

Look at you Stacy - giving words of wisdom to other people dealing with the same thing you are. I'm sure others will appreciate hearing your story that are going through it as well. You are strong!!!!!

 

[shoes99]

Hi Dear Niece Stacy.
The best thing to do with DH is to talk and talk.
Uncle Bud's best friend lost his son at age 19 in a boating accident at LBI.
The Mom Charlene went into such a depression that she did not want to get out of bed. Her other kids 14, 12 and 6 had to fend for themselves for at least a year before she got help. Her husband was a dear, but he left for work at 6:30AM. We think about you and Andy and Damien every day.
Even the cruise next week for me will be a little weepy. Remember, I was with you and your family including Damien last September. We have great memories. Damien went from the chicken fingers kid to ordering snails for the appitizer. We all had a great smile over that.
Aunt Michele

 

[pfishgirl]

Hi Dear Niece Stacy.
The best thing to do with DH is to talk and talk.
Uncle Bud's best friend lost his son at age 19 in a boating accident at LBI.
The Mom Charlene went into such a depression that she did not want to get out of bed. Her other kids 14, 12 and 6 had to fend for themselves for at least a year before she got help. Her husband was a dear, but he left for work at 6:30AM. We think about you and Andy and Damien every day.
Even the cruise next week for me will be a little weepy. Remember, I was with you and your family including Damien last September. We have great memories. Damien went from the chicken fingers kid to ordering snails for the appitizer. We all had a great smile over that.
Aunt Michele

He had snails AND chicken fingers and we had Palo's. He was so excited to have Palo's finally after waiting and waiting til he was 18

and yes, I was assuming it may bit a weepy for you as well. I'm so glad you have the Veggie Car races and Happy memories to hold on to with Damien

and Thank You... but, you know as much as me that Andy is a stubborn one, they all are.. But I do talk to him.. He just holds things back that I wish he didn't..

 

[IceSk8ersMom]

Stacy, I am sailing with you in December 2010. I admire your strength and your courage. My thoughts and prayers continue to be with you. I hope this Dis board gives you some comfort. I am sending you a cyber-hug

 

[shoes99]

I have permission from my niece Stacy to post some pics from Damien's High School Graduation party/brunch.
Aunt Michele
Four generations of family:

Damien and his cousins:

 

[5 'LIL *TWINKERS*]

Im so very sorry for your loss......prayers and hugs to you and your dh.

 

[pfishgirl]

I Miss Him So Much........................

 

[mommasita]

I Miss Him So Much........................

 

[Minnie&Nana]

Hold tight to every memory.

 

[Luv2Roam]

Just here to give a

 

[DanceRC28]

So sorry for your loss, sending my thoughts and prayers out to you and your family!

 

[ibelieveinmagic]

oh sweetheart, i am so very very sorry! I'ts ok to cry as much as you need to- hugs to you!

 

[kathyseb]

Stacey,
I have lost two nephews, both in their 20s. I know how my heart aches at not having them with us anymore, but to even begin to imagine what life is for my two sisters. There are bad days and good days.

Looks like you have a trip coming up.
Two years ago, I lost my mom on November 12. On the 27th that year we took off for WDW. The last place in the world I wanted to be.
The trip was like a blur to me. I did a lot of crying as we walked around the World. But also a lot of memoires flooded into my mind from the trip my mom took with DH and myself.

I set out to buy something from there that would remind me of my mom everytime I looked at it. I searched high and low for the right thing. I finally got a ornament of Minnie dressed like an angel holding a candle.

Sounds like at least your aunt and uncle are going with you. Take the time on the trip to celebrate your son's life. Relive your memories.

My heart goes out to you. Take each day one step at a time.

 

[pfishgirl]

Stacey,
I have lost two nephews, both in their 20s. I know how my heart aches at not having them with us anymore, but to even begin to imagine what life is for my two sisters. There are bad days and good days.

Looks like you have a trip coming up.
Two years ago, I lost my mom on November 12. On the 27th that year we took off for WDW. The last place in the world I wanted to be.
The trip was like a blur to me. I did a lot of crying as we walked around the World. But also a lot of memoires flooded into my mind from the trip my mom took with DH and myself.

I set out to buy something from there that would remind me of my mom everytime I looked at it. I searched high and low for the right thing. I finally got a ornament of Minnie dressed like an angel holding a candle.

Sounds like at least your aunt and uncle are going with you. Take the time on the trip to celebrate your son's life. Relive your memories.

My heart goes out to you. Take each day one step at a time.

Thank You for your thoughts and sharing your story..

We are going with friends of ours and Their family.. Aunt Michele won't be with us this time. But she was with us last year when our son was with us as well.

 

[IceSk8ersMom]

Stacy,

I know you are leaving tomorrow for your cruise. It will be a difficult journey for you, but you are not alone. I am sending positive thoughts and prayers your way. Have a safe and peaceful trip.

Lisa

 

[Minnie&Nana]

Stacey, I too, will be thinking of you most especially these next days. Take gentle care... there may be many mixed emotions, but am praying there will be happy memories as well. God bless.

 

[pfishgirl]

Back in NJ

We had some ups and downs as expected while on the Magic, but it was a nice relief in a way at Castaway..

DH & I are feeling a little bit better but of course we came home with Colds

 

[shoes99]

Back in NJ

We had some ups and downs as expected while on the Magic, but it was a nice relief in a way at Castaway..

DH & I are feeling a little bit better but of course we came home with Colds

Welcome home dear niece Stacy. Sorry we missed you on 9/10 on our way back to the airport. Also sorry that you had another death in the family. I went to Uncle Alan's wake in the afternoon on Sunday. I got to see your in-laws before they flew back to Colorado on Monday. Hope DH got to see his folks before they went back.
Love you...

 

[pfishgirl]

Welcome home dear niece Stacy. Sorry we missed you on 9/10 on our way back to the airport. Also sorry that you had another death in the family. I went to Uncle Alan's wake in the afternoon on Sunday. I got to see your in-laws before they flew back to Colorado on Monday. Hope DH got to see his folks before they went back.
Love you...

Thank You.. Andy missed Mom and Dad by like 10 minutes. He went to the brunch after the funeral and sat with Grandma & Grandpa.