Your child's school rules: the stupid, weird, or just plain annoying

[kacaju]

My oldest started middle school this year and I find some of the rules at his school to be, at minimum, annoying. Two examples:

Students may not use book bags during the school day. Girls may not carry purses. What a pain for the kids to have to haul their notebooks, folders, textbooks, novels, pencils, project supplies, etc. from class to class without being able to just keep them in a book bag. Ugh. I guess girls have to make a special trip to their lockers to get feminine products when needed. Double ugh.

ummm...that is what the lockers are for.... I guess you have not been inside a classroom with 20+ kids at desks with 20+ backbpacks all over the floor? Middle School Lunch lady here and our school starting this year told the kids they are no longer allowed to carry their backpacks from class to class. The teachers I see are very happy.

 

[jrmasm]

ummm...that is what the lockers are for.... I guess you have not been inside a classroom with 20+ kids at desks with 20+ backbpacks all over the floor? Middle School Lunch lady here and our school starting this year told the kids they are no longer allowed to carry their backpacks from class to class. The teachers I see are very happy.

Didn't you carry a backpack to class when you were in school? Plenty of kids did back in the stone ages when I was in middle/high school.

Yeah, I think this is a stupid rule too.

 

[BeachGirlFLA]

The local high end (spendy) Catholic high school does not allow water bottles of any kind because the kids were drinking vodka out of them.


I have a middle schooler, I really can't stand when parents do exactly what you did here. You think the rules don't apply to you and that bugs me.
A 12/13 year old is not going to "starve" over one missed lunch and I am sure that the loss of a meal will help him to remember his stuff.

My DD's school does not have a no drop off policy but I certainly do. She would have had to bum a snack from her friends, I'm not going to drive into town and take her the lunch that she forgot.

Secondly, kids that age share with each other, I would hazard to guess that your son could have bummed a few snacks from his friends.

DD attends a Charter School - we really don't have any useless rules. I her school, its awesome!

What if your child had a medical issue that meant that no food for the day would make them sick - for instance low blood sugar, diabetes, etc.

 

[Owl's Friend]

If my kid didn't have her lunch she would starve (food allergies) and it wouldn't do a damn thing to help her remember it next time (memory deficient).

 

[NikitaZee]

At my kids' elementary school there's a 'three second rule' at the water fountains. Three seconds to take a drink - that's it, even after outdoor recess. I just send them in with water bottles.

 

[Goofyluver]

Last year, our kid's school had a rule that ONLY male students had to tuck in all shirts (whether t-shirt, sweater, or polo) and belt all pants (whether shorts or jeans). ONLY males. I thought the rule itself was stupid, but the fact that the female students didn't have to participate made it doubly ridiculous.

They also can't have backpacks at school, but they can have the little draw-string bags or a small purse. I'm sure this rule has some sort of reason, but I can't for the life of me figure it out.

 

[sam_gordon]

I have dropped things off for my DD before. Her school used to be on the way to sister's daycare, so we'd make a stop first. In 6th grade, it felt like I was making the trip every couple weeks. In 7th grade, it was every month. In 8th grade DW has made 1 trip (two months in).

Again, the school's not that far out of our way. Lunch $$ we can deposit online.

I hate doing it, but she has been getting better as the years go on.

 

[mamacatnv]

What if your child had a medical issue that meant that no food for the day would make them sick - for instance low blood sugar, diabetes, etc.

If there was a life threatening issue I am sure the school would
A. be aware of it
and
B. would allow the mom to drop off the child's food.

Arguments like these annoy me, there is always the person seeking an exception. If my kid had an issue that not eating could cause major harm, you can bet that I would make sure that child had a stash of snacks in their locker, backpack, pocket etc.

The average 12 year old is not going to die from missing lunch. Lets be reasonable and think clearly.

 

[MinnieLovesMickey]

I remember there being some interesting rules back when I was in elementary school, like no walking in between the buildings and no wearing shorts. I guess it's gotten much stricter since the late 80s.

 

[Poohforyou]

I guess I'm a bad parent because I have no idea what the rules are at DD's middle school. She's a rule follower though so I have no concern that she's towing the line. She hasn't complained about anything so I guess they're all pretty reasonable.

I do know I need to call the school in the morning to report her absense but have no idea if she'll be penalized if I don't. Teachers will leave work in the office if I request it prior to noon.

I also know I can drop forgotten items off in the main office and my DD will be called down during the next break between periods to get them.

Finally DD's school will provide lunch if a child forgot theirs and doesn't have a lunch account. We've never had to take advantage of that since DD has never forgotten her lunch and has $5 tucked inside her backpack for emergencies.

 

[DisneyLoverUSA]

I do know our schools have a rule of no unnatural hair colors and nothing like big spiked Mohawks. No earrings on boys, no unnatural piercings like lips and eyebrows.

I can't believe there are even parents out there who think it is ok for a kid to go 7 hours with no food. OH THEY'LL LIVE. I feel sorry for your kid with that attitude.

There's NO WAY I would allow that school to tell me I couldn't drop off my kid's lunch or lunch money. WATCH ME!

 

[disykat]

And we disagree based on the rest of your comments about clear alcohol. That is exactly why the rule is completely stupid.

So, if I'm getting your point - you don't think there should be any rules that kids might try to find a way around?

 

[mhsjax]

The local high end (spendy) Catholic high school does not allow water bottles of any kind because the kids were drinking vodka out of them.


I have a middle schooler, I really can't stand when parents do exactly what you did here. You think the rules don't apply to you and that bugs me.
A 12/13 year old is not going to "starve" over one missed lunch and I am sure that the loss of a meal will help him to remember his stuff.

My DD's school does not have a no drop off policy but I certainly do. She would have had to bum a snack from her friends, I'm not going to drive into town and take her the lunch that she forgot.

Secondly, kids that age share with each other, I would hazard to guess that your son could have bummed a few snacks from his friends.

DD attends a Charter School - we really don't have any useless rules. I her school, its awesome!

YOu would just have to get pissed at me. But then again our school doesn't have that rule about lunch, and they will let them eat. My DD can't eat before she leaves for school, she doesn't get home until 2:30. Sorry but if she goes that long without eating she gets sick, and no I won't allow that. Adults can deal with it at work, they can leave, they can get co workers to get them something, why should a child be different. For me it is a 10 minute drive, why does that offend you so much? HOmework, ye I agree and our school doesn't allow it, but food is a different story.

I love my kids school also, they are reasonable about things like lunch. I love them.

 

[mamacatnv]

I do know our schools have a rule of no unnatural hair colors and nothing like big spiked Mohawks. No earrings on boys, no unnatural piercings like lips and eyebrows.

I can't believe there are even parents out there who think it is ok for a kid to go 7 hours with no food. OH THEY'LL LIVE. I feel sorry for your kid with that attitude.

There's NO WAY I would allow that school to tell me I couldn't drop off my kid's lunch or lunch money. WATCH ME!

I know personally I don't know of any 12 year old that would in the words of a few posters "starve". My DD's day is 6.5 hours, she generally eats breakfast on the way as its a 20 minute drive. If she forgot her lunch I can assure you she would not be dead at 2:30 when I arrive to pick her up.

The OP's school has a rule, no drop offs. IMO its not an unreasonable rule. Remember the OP was talking about a middle schooler here, not a kindergartner that would most likely melt down over lack of a snack but a middle schooler.

What is unreasonable to me is the parents like you who would challenge a rule over a snack and have the "bring it on" type of attitude.
Parents like you who feel that they have the right to go against the rules and then who go so far as to say you feel sorry for my kid because I think its important they learn to self manage and to be accountable for themselves in middle school!

 

[disykat]

I'm on board with the whole "love and logic" thing. I get it. I've read it, I even use it regularly. However, I think many schools are really going over the top with the natural consequences thing. I always think what would happen if I forgot something that was essential for me to do my job and asked my dh if there was any way he could do me a favor and bring it by. I'd be really angry if he was able to do it but refused so I'd learn my lesson.

I have rescued my child on RARE occasions (I can think of 3 times total in their school career and I have two kids almost through high school - a lunch once for my child with food allergies, a homework project once, and taking a child back for a forgotten coat once) and I make no apologies for it. Continual rescues and the child will learn nothing. A rescue on rare occasion just speaks to a recognition that everyone makes mistakes sometimes and people who care about each other help each other out.

 

[mhsjax]

I know personally I don't know of any 12 year old that would in the words of a few posters "starve". My DD's day is 6.5 hours, she generally eats breakfast on the way as its a 20 minute drive. If she forgot her lunch I can assure you she would not be dead at 2:30 when I arrive to pick her up.

The OP's school has a rule, no drop offs. IMO its not an unreasonable rule. Remember the OP was talking about a middle schooler here, not a kindergartner that would most likely melt down over lack of a snack but a middle schooler.

What is unreasonable to me is the parents like you who would challenge a rule over a snack and have the "bring it on" type of attitude.
Parents like you who feel that they have the right to go against the rules and then who go so far as to say you feel sorry for my kid because I think its important they learn to self manage and to be accountable for themselves in middle school!

I feel sorry for your kid also. How about the time when my sons teacher forgot to send the money to the lunchroom, I happened to call, just how does he learn responsibility for that? And not all kids eat before school, some of us can't stomach food at that hour. Like I said thank God for reasonable school like ours, that actually care if your kids eat. Don't know why it bothers you so much, bringing food isn't doing a darn thing to make it unfair for your kid. Get over it. See above post about occasionally helping people that you love out, seems it might be helpful. I have 3 kids and I have had to do this once for one kid, but too darn bad if it bothered you should I have to do it for another one every once in a while.

I have a question, did you ever or do you now work? Have you ever forgotten your lunch or lunch money? You can go to the ATM, you can go out, you can get a co worker to bring you something. Some people here are so high and mighty with what they think kids should and shouldn't do, that they forget everyone is human and adults have options that kids don't.

 

[jodifla]

I know personally I don't know of any 12 year old that would in the words of a few posters "starve". My DD's day is 6.5 hours, she generally eats breakfast on the way as its a 20 minute drive. If she forgot her lunch I can assure you she would not be dead at 2:30 when I arrive to pick her up.

The OP's school has a rule, no drop offs. IMO its not an unreasonable rule. Remember the OP was talking about a middle schooler here, not a kindergartner that would most likely melt down over lack of a snack but a middle schooler.

What is unreasonable to me is the parents like you who would challenge a rule over a snack and have the "bring it on" type of attitude.
Parents like you who feel that they have the right to go against the rules and then who go so far as to say you feel sorry for my kid because I think its important they learn to self manage and to be accountable for themselves in middle school!

No, she wouldn't be dead....but she might have friggin' lousy school day where she doesn't learn much the second half of the day.

People forget things....there's none of these BOGUS requirements for adults....I forget something...I run out and pick it up on my lunch hour. Or one of my co-workers...even my boss! lend it to me.

 

[BeachGirlFLA]

I know personally I don't know of any 12 year old that would in the words of a few posters "starve". My DD's day is 6.5 hours, she generally eats breakfast on the way as its a 20 minute drive. If she forgot her lunch I can assure you she would not be dead at 2:30 when I arrive to pick her up.

The OP's school has a rule, no drop offs. IMO its not an unreasonable rule. Remember the OP was talking about a middle schooler here, not a kindergartner that would most likely melt down over lack of a snack but a middle schooler.

What is unreasonable to me is the parents like you who would challenge a rule over a snack and have the "bring it on" type of attitude.
Parents like you who feel that they have the right to go against the rules and then who go so far as to say you feel sorry for my kid because I think its important they learn to self manage and to be accountable for themselves in middle school!

Rules like that (as well as several other factors) are the reason that my fiance (husband in exactly a month) and I will home school.

 

[marcyinPA]

The local high end (spendy) Catholic high school does not allow water bottles of any kind because the kids were drinking vodka out of them.


I have a middle schooler, I really can't stand when parents do exactly what you did here. You think the rules don't apply to you and that bugs me.
A 12/13 year old is not going to "starve" over one missed lunch and I am sure that the loss of a meal will help him to remember his stuff.

My DD's school does not have a no drop off policy but I certainly do. She would have had to bum a snack from her friends, I'm not going to drive into town and take her the lunch that she forgot.

Secondly, kids that age share with each other, I would hazard to guess that your son could have bummed a few snacks from his friends.

DD attends a Charter School - we really don't have any useless rules. I her school, its awesome!

See bolded. Far from it, actually. I agree with the no drop offs. My kid has forgotten homework, drum sticks and gym clothes and has suffered the consequences.

I think the "no food" rule is stupid, and I will not support it. Good for you that you feel that it is ok for your child to go without food from breakfast to pick up time. I know my kid would not be able to function, and I don't feel that it is worth it for him to mess up his entire day because he's hungry. And yes, he would be HUNGRY. He's a growing boy.

I have only had to bail him out once from grades 1-7 (so far)....I don't have one ounce of guilt over it. Not one ounce. (and no driving into town for me- the school is walking distance, and only a few seconds by car.)

 

[Poohforyou]

I'm on board with the whole "love and logic" thing. I get it. I've read it, I even use it regularly. However, I think many schools are really going over the top with the natural consequences thing. I always think what would happen if I forgot something that was essential for me to do my job and asked my dh if there was any way he could do me a favor and bring it by. I'd be really angry if he was able to do it but refused so I'd learn my lesson.

I have rescued my child on RARE occasions (I can think of 3 times total in their school career and I have two kids almost through high school - a lunch once for my child with food allergies, a homework project once, and taking a child back for a forgotten coat once) and I make no apologies for it. Continual rescues and the child will learn nothing. A rescue on rare occasion just speaks to a recognition that everyone makes mistakes sometimes and people who care about each other help each other out.

I completely agree with you. Last year DD texted me on the bus 2 different times and asked if I could drop something off that she had forgotten. I had no problem doing that and she really appreciated it. If she did if often and/or just took my time for granted I wouldn't be accommodating.

As for going against school rules to drop something off, I wouldn't do that unless it was a matter of life and death (lunch doesn't fall in this category). If I felt a rule was unreasonable I'd do what I could to have it changed but I wouldn't expect the school to overlook the rule for my child just because I didn't think it was fair.