Young dating...

[Mickey Mouse Kid]

I completely understand what you are saying, but in defense of middler schoolers. They are just living in the moment.
They don't really know about real relationships and dating.
They are just exploring and testing the water. And having fun.

I'm not saying I condone children having sex or being sexual with one another.
I am just saying I understand that they are just growing up and they want to expirience new things. That's how I was like in middle school.
I learned alot of boys then.

And I'm not trying to be condesending towards younger people just because I'm older. I hope people are getting my point?

I am not saying it is completely wrong to have a gf/bf in middle school, but I think it is wayyyy to young to think you actually have a real relationship. life of the party was surprised because most of us think people should actually start real dating in high school or around 16 (or that's how I took it)

 

[DramaQueen]

I am not saying it is completely wrong to have a gf/bf in middle school, but I think it is wayyyy to young to think you actually have a real relationship. life of the party was surprised because most of us think people should actually start real dating in high school or around 16 (or that's how I took it)

gotcha

 

[2HOT2touch]

Love is a two way thing, you can not love without being loved in return. Its not love, if its not returned, its infatuation. You're infatuated with this guy, not in love with him.

there is a vast difference.

I'm sorry, but that sounds like something someone that didn't know what they were talking about would say. You can love someone that doesn't love you back. You can be in a relationship with someone for 6 months and you trully know you love them, but they might not love you back, it does not mean you are infatuated with them, you trully can have feelings of love for that person, it does not mean they have to love you back. But it does take 2 people to have a relationship, but you don't have to love someone to have a relationship with them. You may think you love Mike and you might love him, but he is your first boyfriend, how do you know that you love him if you haven't had any expeirience. The point of dating to know who is right and who is wrong for, that way you end up with your true love in the end. I have had many boyfriends that said they 'loved' me but they didn't mean it, it has been said so many times to me that I can pretty much tell when they mean it and when they don't. I'm sorry for the reality check, but your living in a fantasy, he is your first boyfriend so you think you love him and will marry him. You may love him, he may be your first love, but how did you know that you loved him so early in the relationship? how do you KNOW what love IS if you have never had any experience before? I'm not trying to be mean, just realistic.

 

[big_ol_lineman]

ok im gonna shut up now i dont like to argue so this is my last post here lata peeps

 

[BabyPiglet]

I'm sorry, but that sounds like something someone that didn't know what they were talking about would say. You can love someone that doesn't love you back. You can be in a relationship with someone for 6 months and you trully know you love them, but they might not love you back, it does not mean you are infatuated with them, you trully can have feelings of love for that person, it does not mean they have to love you back. But it does take 2 people to have a relationship, but you don't have to love someone to have a relationship with them. You may think you love Mike and you might love him, but he is your first boyfriend, how do you know that you love him if you haven't had any expeirience. The point of dating to know who is right and who is wrong for, that way you end up with your true love in the end. I have had many boyfriends that said they 'loved' me but they didn't mean it, it has been said so many times to me that I can pretty much tell when they mean it and when they don't. I'm sorry for the reality check, but your living in a fantasy, he is your first boyfriend so you think you love him and will marry him. You may love him, he may be your first love, but how did you know that you loved him so early in the relationship? how do you KNOW what love IS if you have never had any experience before? I'm not trying to be mean, just realistic.

Umm have you even read Shelly's posts? If you would it is clearly shown she is infatuated. How can she be in LOVE with someone who insults her? No...I agree with Shelby, you can't love someone who doesn't love you back.

 

[2HOT2touch]

Umm have you even read Shelly's posts? If you would it is clearly shown she is infatuated. How can she be in LOVE with someone who insults her? No...I agree with Shelby, you can't love someone who doesn't love you back.

I wasn't commenting on SHELLY'S post, I was commenting on SHELBY'S post. And yes you can love someone that doesn't love you back, it may not apply in Shelly's case, because she isn't even dating the guy, and therefore doesn't know him romantically. And you can love someone that is a jerk to you, it may not make sense but it happens.

 

[BabyPiglet]

I wasn't commenting on SHELLY'S post, I was commenting on SHELBY'S post. And yes you can love someone that doesn't love you back, it may not apply in Shelly's case, because she isn't even dating the guy, and therefore doesn't know him romantically. And you can love someone that is a jerk to you, it may not make sense but it happens.

No it doesn't. It isn't true love. I am too tired to argue with you at this moment. But you can't love someone who doesn't love you back, period.

 

[2HOT2touch]

I'm sorry that your tired, but again yes you can. There are different levels of love, I can love my mom, and my best friend and then my boyfriend, those are all different types of love. I'll give you an example of something that happened today.

I was talking to my bestfriend on the phone and her boyfriend was there too I am pretty good friends with him and it turns out we are sort of related. but anyway I was arguing with him about something again, because he pisses me off sometimes and then he was talking to my best friend and was like "she doesnt love me but I love her." <--- example of how one person can love another with out the love being returned.

another example (which isn't based on a true story that I know of but it happens) There is a couple that has been dating 4 months they go out on a nice date one night and the boy looks into the girls eyes and says "I love you" and he waits patiently for her response. the girl looks at him with disbelief, she was just along for the ride, but somewhere during that ride the boy fell in love. She wasn't expecting it and broke up with him, because she trully did not love him the way he loved her.

love doesn't always have to be true love. And you can love someone that is a jerk to you, my first love was a HUGE jerk to me, but I still loved him. It could have been I liked the thrill of the relationship and I like a challenge and that was deffinately a challenge. Or it could have been because he always made up for being a jerk afterwards. I don't know, but I do know that I loved him.

 

[BabyPiglet]

I'm sorry that your tired, but again yes you can. There are different levels of love, I can love my mom, and my best friend and then my boyfriend, those are all different types of love. I'll give you an example of something that happened today.

I was talking to my bestfriend on the phone and her boyfriend was there too I am pretty good friends with him and it turns out we are sort of related. but anyway I was arguing with him about something again, because he pisses me off sometimes and then he was talking to my best friend and was like "she doesnt love me but I love her." <--- example of how one person can love another with out the love being returned.
another example (which isn't based on a true story that I know of but it happens) There is a couple that has been dating 4 months they go out on a nice date one night and the boy looks into the girls eyes and says "I love you" and he waits patiently for her response. the girl looks at him with disbelief, she was just along for the ride, but somewhere during that ride the boy fell in love. She wasn't expecting it and broke up with him, because she trully did not love him the way he loved her.
love doesn't always have to be true love. And you can love someone that is a jerk to you, my first love was a HUGE jerk to me, but I still loved him. It could have been I liked the thrill of the relationship and I like a challenge and that was deffinately a challenge. Or it could have been because he always made up for being a jerk afterwards. I don't know, but I do know that I loved him.

That is joking around

The boy was infatuated

I dont think you honestly loved him then.

 

[tinkerbelle22]

No it doesn't. It isn't true love. I am too tired to argue with you at this moment. But you can't love someone who doesn't love you back, period.

I believe that you can. And besides, that's your opinion. I think differently. I don't want to sound like a therapist here, but there's just not one truth. I'm not trying to argue, but I agree with 2HOT2touch. I wouldn't say I'm extremely in love with this guy, but I've never had feelings like this before. Every thing everyone explained about their boyfriends or whatever? That's exactly how I feel. I can't get over him, and when I'm with him or near him, I forget everything bad for the moment. Like I said, I'm not trying to argue, I never argue with anyone on this board. I just think I love him. That's it.

Edit: On the original note...I think you should really start dating in high school. But I've always been the "sensitive girl" who wants a true relationship, not just a random guy to call my boyfriend. I don't know. I think the sex and big time dating in middle school is kind of silly.

 

[DramaQueen]

No it doesn't. It isn't true love. I am too tired to argue with you at this moment. But you can't love someone who doesn't love you back, period.

hmmm, this is an interesting debate.
i'm not entirely sure which side i'm on.
i kind of think that you can love someone who doesn't love you back,
like if you're in a relationship and you truly love that person, but they don't love you back. i don't think that's infatuation, i think that the one person truly loves the other person.
but then if you're not in a relationship and you have a huge crush on someone and you think you love them, that, to an outsider is an obvious example of infatuation, even if you believe so hard that you love the person.
(that happened to me once, i was completely infatuated with someone, and i thought the feeling of infatuation was love.)

here's a scenario;
two people are dating one of them LOVES the other, the other says it back, but doesn't mean it. The one who doesn't mean it is cheating without the one who does mean it knowing.
Does that mean the one who truly does mean it, doesn't actaully mean it?

anyways, that's just my two cents on the subject.

 

[VolleyballQt07]

Oh wow!

I think true love is when both people love each other the same. Because if you love someone who doesn't love you back, isn't it just.........a crush?

 

[AngienLuLu]

Actually.
My friend has been going out with the same guy since 7th grade.
Were in 9th grade now.
But thats an exception

I have a friend who has been going out with the same guy since 4th grade. And they are now in 9th. And of course, in forth grade, they weren't really going out, they just called each other boyfriend/girlfriend.

 

[BabyPiglet]

Oh wow!

I think true love is when both people love each other the same. Because if you love someone who doesn't love you back, isn't it just.........a crush?

Thank you Brit!

Okay, for example there are two people and one of them is in "love" with the other. But the other makes fun of them and is a jerk sometimes. But other times he's a nice guy. Does she really love him or has she just fell hard for him?

I think she is infatuated. I don't see how you can love someone who doesn't have true, passionate love for you. I do agree, there are different kind of loves, and what you are talking about does apply in some other loves. But I am talking about romantic love. Which I 100% truly believe that it takes two to love.

The other love for example might be: There is a 6 year old, and everyday her mother beats her. She had bruises everywhere. The mom lets her boyfriend molest the daughter. But the daughter being so young, and this still being her mother, LOVES her. She does love her mother, even after all this. For some reason she still does. (And please don't tell me this is impossible until you've had 50 battered kids come through your house). The mother has no love for the child. NONE. But yes the daughter loves her.

Family member love is different than romantic, and acts differently.

So there! lol

 

[Babyjustrun]

As far as I'm concerned, you can love someone that doesn't love you.
BUUUUUUUTTTTT
It's not real love, it's friend love, the kind of love you feel towards your everyday friends. If that 'crush' or whatever died, you'd be devastated. You'd feel for them, you'd care for them. The same way you feel about your friends, maybe more than them, and maybe less.
Of course, if you don't reallly know them, then yes, that'd be infatuation.

 

[DramaQueen]

Thank you Brit!

Okay, for example there are two people and one of them is in "love" with the other. But the other makes fun of them and is a jerk sometimes. But other times he's a nice guy. Does she really love him or has she just fell hard for him?
I think she is infatuated. I don't see how you can love someone who doesn't have true, passionate love for you. I do agree, there are different kind of loves, and what you are talking about does apply in some other loves. But I am talking about romantic love. Which I 100% truly believe that it takes two to love.

good point.

okay, but what if, let's say she loves him, and he says he loves her, but he is sneaking around behind her back, or doing jerky things without her knowing.
she doesn't know about it, she THINKS he loves her.
is she infatuated?
(not trying to be arguementative, i just like hearing everyones opinions)

 

[BabyPiglet]

good point.

okay, but what if, let's say she loves him, and he says he loves her, but he is sneaking around behind her back, or doing jerky things without her knowing.
she doesn't know about it, she THINKS he loves her.
is she infatuated?
(not trying to be arguementative, i just like hearing everyones opinions)

Okay if the guy is jerky enough to go fooling around with other girls, then the girl shouldn't be in love anyway.

Honestly I dont think either are in love. But thats a very interesting question.

 

[2HOT2touch]

That is joking around

The boy was infatuated

I dont think you honestly loved him then.

First of all who are you to tell me how I feel and how people feel about me?

second no, he wasn't joking, he does love me, but as a sister and I love him as a brother.

That boy could have been in love. say the girl really really liked him but wasn't in love with him. He could still love her, because he could have been missled by her really liking him. Love grows on people, you don't love a person you just met. and no, you can't love someone from afar, that would be considered infatuation. But if you have been dating the person or have been really close to that person for some time, than yes, one of those people could be in love but the other doesn't have to be. just like you can like someone but the other person doesn't have to like you back.

and as for my ex boyfriend, again how can you tell me how I felt for him? I wasn't infatuated, I wasn't misled by having a boyfriend. He was really my first love. You can have many loves through out your life, but there is ONE that you trully love, and dating is what lets you figure out who is your true love. You may find your true love in highschool, but you aren't gunna find it with your first boyfriend with in the first couple of weeks or even months of dating him. Your true love might be your first boyfriend, but your not gunna know that within the first couple of months, EXPECIALLY if it is your first boyfriend and you haven't had any experience before, because everyone elses expeirence is different. You can't go off of what other people feel for their significant others, because it isn't you and it isn't your significant other. for you love could be he makes your heart melt everytime he looks in your eyes. But for me it could be someone putting me down and then picking me back up again. everyone is different, therefore everyones style of love is different. you can't tell people who they love and why. But you can be realistic about it.

 

[crazy2beautiful]

Personally, I didn't start dating until I turned 17.
Not necessarily by choice...that's just how it happened.
I'm actually happy I didn't start dating in middle school. I don't think it should actually count as dating until you're old enough to drive and actually go on dates.

 

[Mickey Mouse Kid]

Okay if the guy is jerky enough to go fooling around with other girls, then the girl shouldn't be in love anyway.

Honestly I dont think either are in love. But thats a very interesting question.

But what if the girl hadn't seen any signs of what is happening behind her back, and he actually does act like he loves her?