You won't believe the conversation I had with my sister (as DVC members, you might)

[CarpeDisney]

I can definitely believe this, and can relate to it.

We've owned DVC for just about 3 years now. On each of the three annual trips we've taken, we've invited different sets of relatives (my mother on one trip, mother-in-law and father-in-law on another, and one with brother-in-law, his fiancee and her 2 kids) with us to let us all experience things together.

The most recent trip to BLT we (me, DW, and 2 DDs) invited my mother-in-law and father-in-law along to have a great vacation with their grand daughters, and for the kids to have a great memory of their grandparents.

About a month before our trip I receive a TEXT message from my brother-in-law's fiancee (took her and her family with us on the previous year's trip) that read "Just found out I have some vacation time coming. Have room for me and my daughter to join you in the two bedroom, right?"

I just about dropped when I got it. The audacity to 1) ask to join when not ever approached about the trip, and more so 2) to do it VIA A TEXT MESSAGE was unbelievable (especially since we rarely communicate with each other anyway).

So, I figured if she didn't have the common courtesy to pick up the phone and call (nor the common courtesy to NOT invite herself along) I figured she deserved just as much courtesy from me.

Simple (text) response from me: "No"

....was the last time she ever mentioned it or asked about future Disney trips.

Don't get me wrong, my wife and I are all about sharing what we have with those around us, but this situation was completely ridiculous.

 

[Sammie]

I knew my family and in laws long before I bought DVC, due to that, we never offered. No problems that way.

I knew if I ever gave them an inch they would take so much more than a mile.

 

[FindingFigment]

I think most people think of timeshares as a use-it-or-lose-it deal. I don't even own DVC yet but whenever I'm talking about it to friends or family, as soon as I say the word timeshare, you can see them perk up. One family member even said, "Good! I hope you buy it so we can come with you".

I don't have any experience with staying in timeshare condos but I get the impression they must usually sleep 6-8 people? Because that seems to be the common misperception about what I'll be owning.

Once I explain that the contracts are based on points and we'd buy the minimum number of points we need, then they usually lose interest in the conversation and want to move on.

 

[soxyes]

It just goes to show... "A good deed never goes unpunished"

 

[KingRichard]

Too Funny!

Reminds me of when we rented a beach house and invited a good friend and her child.

It was a small place, but worked for the 6 of us.

So she says I will give you a few hundred for food, great right?

Next thing I know, we got the boyfriend, his sister, her boyfriend and his 2 kids plus a dog?

Of course never met most of them.

Try to talk about it and the response was I paid into this place and I can invite who I want!

Well that was 5 years ago and she hasn't been invited back again. lol

Live and learn!

 

[mousefan1972]

I think the OP was VERY generous to treat her extended family and friends to a trip in 2007. She also handled her sister's query very well. I wouldn't have been so tactful, I think.

We've owned DVC for a year, and we've told one couple who we are close friends with. That's it. Our family doesn't know we own, and probably never will. As DH says, "It's none of their business". I am glad we don't have to deal with clueless people asking for "free" rooms.

 

[Disneypirate85]

AHHHHH...family. Curious how many times did she say "your going AGAIN"?...lol.

 

[Micca]

I agree with those who say it's a matter of ignorance rather than rudeness. OP was very generous to provide the one trip they did.

 

[DizBub]

I have a slightly different issue......my sister (who I love dearly) and her husband own a beautiful condo in Lake of the Ozarks, 5 hours from where we all live. They have been so generous and gracious over the years with their good fortune and we have always tried to contribute in different ways to thank them. For many years we brought gifts, dvd players, towel sets, kitchen utensils, etc. I always buy groceries, help cook and clean. We are always welcome.

When we bought DVC about 18 months ago I was most excited about being able to treat/pay back my sister and her family. Guess what...................THEY ARE NOT INTERESTED!!!

I was crushed. And the kicker is that she "bought" (charity auction) a week at an off-property condo close to WDW for this year at spring break. THAT stings.

 

[DVC-Don]

Been there. We once had a 2 bedroom at OKW. There was my family of 4 and I invited my aunt, uncle and sister to stay with us. So there are supposed to 7 of us. Well my sister shows up WITH ANOTHER COUPLE WITH HER and says she didn't think I'd mind. I told here she'd have to find another room for them as they were not staying with us. They did get a studio and my sister stayed with them and was all in a huff. My sister has never been invited again.

 

[kikiq]

We're lucky so far. My DH's family doesn't do Disney although some of the younger members have expressed interest in joining us sometime in the future, so that might change. We've taken my family on 2 trips so far. One to WDW and one to DLR. My brother and sil pay for groceries. My Dad usually pays for one meal out for all of us. We're heading to VGC this Memorial Day weekend.

Whenever someone asks about using our points, I usually say IF we have any available then they are welcome to use them for the cost of the dues on those points or the going rental rate. No takers yet

 

[Inkmahm]

We often take family with us to share our DVC good fortune. WE enjoy having them and never charge for the room. We usually end up paying for all of the meals, too.

The only person who has the nerve to keep asking when she can come with us is my SIL. She doesn't have the money to go on her own, so she keeps trying to invite herself. Every time she suggests it, I get less and less motivated to take her with us at some point.

 

[MEK]

I agree that it is often a matter of ignorance rather than rudeness. We took very close friends of ours last May. We stayed in a 2BR at VWL and it almost used all my points for the year. We had a lovely time, but I was really surprised when they didn't offer to take us out to dinner there (or when we got home). Nothing. I felt bad. I know when you offer to take someone on a trip you shouldn't expect anything in return, but I was just hoping for some small gesture. Even a thank you note would have been nice. I just don't think they realized the cost that's entailed and the balancing act we do ever year to make the most out of our points.

Oh well...as they say ....live and learn!

We invited Florida friends to spend a weekend with us on another trip and they insisted on taking us out to dinner. I think they realized the value of the room and were overjoyed when we offered to have them stay with us instead of paying for a room somewhere on property.

 

[dvc at last !]

DVC-Don,
We have friends who live in Solivita and they love it !
They are on Lake Cassidy Dr., and they love Disney, too !

 

[Lynne M]

Given the number of times this comes up here, I'd have to agree that it's ignorance. So many people don't 'get' timeshares, and think it's like a vacation home. It's there, it's sitting empty, and you can go there whenever you want and not put any money out because you own it.

Heck, there are some members who don't get the difference. I have a vivid memory of a very confused, very upset couple standing at the front desk, while a CM explained that being a DVC member did NOT mean that you could walk into your home resort and get a room anytime you wanted to.

 

[Dean]

I knew my family and in laws long before I bought DVC, due to that, we never offered. No problems that way.

I knew if I ever gave them an inch they would take so much more than a mile.

I alluded to it above but I think it's a very important point. IF one has family that has exhibited issues to suggest they are leeches or don't consider others situations, such trips seem to magnify those issues. I think many people try to convince themselves that it'll be OK this time, esp because it's Disney. We've averaged, what about 2-3 similar thread's per year for some time. Some issues that are red flags off the top of my head.

• Can't make up their mind.
• Tends to cancel last minute.
• Has a way to work it so that someone else pay for the meal, room, etc.
• Has a tendency to take over events.
• Has a habit of bringing uninvited people for other events.
• A hx of creating drama

I'm sure we can all think of others.

 

[BEASLYBOO]

You did a very nice thing and extended your DVC to friends and family, and I'm sure that just as I do the same you expected no compensation when you offered. A thank you is still nice to hear from time to time, as you have done, I host our family reunion every 3 or 4 years and I book a GV and a few Studios, I do so because I want to and because I can. I have always been rewarded by friends and family with many thanks, nice dinners and shows or park tickets, not necessary but none the less appreciated.

I have only once been asked for the use of my points, short notice by someone who isn't close to me at all, and just as you replied to your sister, I said, "Sorry, I'm in a constant state of borrow and I'm out for now!

Some people follow the rule that it never hurts to ask, those are the people that usually complain the loudest and always expect something for nothing, hopefully your sister is not such an individual and she thought, what's the worst you could say, "no"!

 

[dvc4life]

We have been fortunate when we have asked family or friends to go with us. Knock on Wood.

When we took my sister and her two kids we shared a two bedroom at SSR. They were very thankful. She also shared in purchasing the food we had in the room. They have expressed an interest to go back some day and we for sure would take them along if it worked out for everybody.

We have also had some really good friends come up and stay with us while at Disney. We have shared a two bedroom and then we have also gotten them a studio while we get a one bedroom. We don't ask our friends to pay for the room because we are just happy to see them because they live in Florida and we live in Iowa. And since we have to fly and they can just drive up, they bring us our liquid refreshments that we can't fly with. They also bring snack foods for the rooms. And they won't let us pay them back for it either. Oh, and Dave will usually pick up a round of drinks while we are out and about too. So in this instance, and for us, it all works out for the best.

We are just happy that we are able to share our joy with family and friends.

And to the OP, sorry your sister even put you in that position. But I think you went above and beyond. Which is what good people do.

 

[arthur06]

We have been fortunate when we have asked family or friends to go with us. Knock on Wood.

When we took my sister and her two kids we shared a two bedroom at SSR. They were very thankful. She also shared in purchasing the food we had in the room. They have expressed an interest to go back some day and we for sure would take them along if it worked out for everybody.

We have also had some really good friends come up and stay with us while at Disney. We have shared a two bedroom and then we have also gotten them a studio while we get a one bedroom. We don't ask our friends to pay for the room because we are just happy to see them because they live in Florida and we live in Iowa. And since we have to fly and they can just drive up, they bring us our liquid refreshments that we can't fly with. They also bring snack foods for the rooms. And they won't let us pay them back for it either. Oh, and Dave will usually pick up a round of drinks while we are out and about too. So in this instance, and for us, it all works out for the best.

We are just happy that we are able to share our joy with family and friends.

And to the OP, sorry your sister even put you in that position. But I think you went above and beyond. Which is what good people do.

Hello neighbor!

 

[ddoconnell]

WOW! OP what a great thing you did for your family and friends! We take my DSis's and their families at different times, but they never ask me for points or if they can go when we talk about going. We even offered 1 of my DSis's some points because they couldn't make a trip with us and we were told thanks, but maybe another time. Now DH's family is different. One DBro would love to go and be very appreciative, but his kids are too busy to plan a trip too far in advance. The other one would expect us to give him the room for free, pay his way into the park for him, the wife and kids and also provide all of the food....and did I mention baby sit the kids when he wanted to do something else! I know this because he has pulled this on the in-laws when they went with him! Needless to say, the offer to go with us has never been extended. We will take the in-laws or the 1st brother but I love my DVC and WDW time too much to deal with the stress of the "other brother"! As another poster said...if you know they are leeches, then don't offer.

OP, I think you handled your sister in a much more diplomatic way than I would have! Enjoy your DVC and make lots of memories for you and your family!!