Yet another MIL vent.

[auntpolly]

I think what you need is some kind of compromise -- some kind of baby step. Why does it have to be a cruise - why not start with some Sunday dinners and see how that goes.

My DH's father was a pill, that's all I want to say about that, and we never went out of our way to spend time with him, but now that he's gone, my DH has such extreme sadness and guilt that I wish I had it to do over again.

No matter what, that's still your husband's mom and my DH's dad -- it doesn't make sense given their behaviour why they should still need them, but I guess it's just human nature.

I think if you could build some kind of relationship, it will just save you a little heartache in the long run. I know it's not easy -- but I know what I'm talking about, unfortunately.

 

[shortbun]

All these people want you to bury the hatchet and make nice. Several short visits are the way to do that, NOT a week long cruise using all your vacation time and money. My mother was nearly Joan Crawford with my son at times and I've limited their exposure. She wonders why I'm the time nazi, "no time for you!" We have to protect our children from people who are not kind to them. You are doing the right thing. Want to make nice? Meet for lunch and a walk in the park. Don't dedicate a week on a ship to it. Take it from me, those ships are NOT THAT big!!

 

[Tarheel Tink]

Just a note about DH going alone- my DH goes to a family reunion yearly over the July 4th to Oklahoma. My MIL is a sweet woman BUT I can't stand a long exposure to the family. I like my solitude and these people follow me everywhere- to the point of knocking on the bathroom door! I never go the the reunion (Oklahoma,summer,park cabins, no a/c and clinging relatives). No one seems to mind, but even if they did, so what? I am hardly giving up my vacation time for this! Good luck!

 

[Marseeya]

I'm just thinking out loud here, but I don't think I mentioned this.

I don't want to share a 10-day family vacation with anyone, whether we get along with them or not. Not even a week. Long weekend, maybe. Weekend, okay.

 

[juligrl]

All these people want you to bury the hatchet and make nice. Several short visits are the way to do that, NOT a week long cruise using all your vacation time and money. My mother was nearly Joan Crawford with my son at times and I've limited their exposure. She wonders why I'm the time nazi, "no time for you!" We have to protect our children from people who are not kind to them. You are doing the right thing. Want to make nice? Meet for lunch and a walk in the park. Don't dedicate a week on a ship to it. Take it from me, those ships are NOT THAT big!!

Good point! It is all about baby steps and perhaps a weeklong cruise would be going overboard (groan).

I actually get along with my in-laws and I have about a 3-day tolerance level for them on vacation.