Yee Haw Bob Sexual Harrassment

[The Mystery Machine]

It's sad that such an important issue as this has been reduced to the level of this year's "ice bucket challenge".

If she feels so strongly about it but she should take it to the police. Or, in fact, have done so at the time.

As it is, a man could now easily lose his reputation, his livelihood and potentially even his life (see recent Carl Sargent case in Wales, UK) over an unsubstantiated accusation. I'm sure that others will now be making similar claims having seen that Disney is sending $500 checks out. And that will surely force Disney into action, whether he's guilty or not.

You know what really burns me? The fact that a man will lose his reputation for REPORTING it.

I think we have it backwards.

 

[Allison]

I was a teen, but an adult, when the man put his hand on my butt. I told him that it wasn't okay.

I'm 51 now. So we are talking over 30 years ago.

We are in that time now. And have been for quite some time.

Same for me.

 

[Hikergirl]

The way it was related at some point or another in this thread, the friend saw the butt grab and snapped a pic of it to record the said butt grab

Thank you for clarifying, I wasnt sure the details.
I do think it is odd that an adult wouldn't say something, you don't need to be hostile either. You can do it without making a scene, tell him to find another place for his hand.
I get being caught off guard, and I could see a child freezing up in that moment, but a grown woman?
None of the ones I know would have let that move slide.

 

[robinb]

Interesting to note that the OP is nowhere to be seen aside from original post. Just did her friends dirty work and disappeared.

I don't think the thread went like she had hoped.

 

[ashley0139]

That's a disgusting situation how the higher ups covered for the doctor if it's true and it sounds like it is.

It's a pretty complicated situation, but there is evidence that some people knew and covered it up. Or at least didn't go to the police about it. At the very least, USAG created an environment where athletes did not feel like they could report the incidents. It's taken a while for a lot of them to realize they were assaulted because they were children and it was a doctor that they trusted who was doing medical treatments that are in fact legitimate, although he was not certified to perform them.

I guess this won't be a popular opinion but as a grown woman I can't imagine being traumatized by a butt grab for 6 years. I can't imagine not telling the perv in no uncertain terms to get his hand off me either. We need to teach women to speak up for themselves and not be victims.

We need to teach men not to sexually assault and harass people. It's like telling women to cover up more so that men won't rape them. Or, more realistically, will rape someone else instead of them.

Not unpopular with me. What the accuser described is a butt pinch. Hardly a traumatic incident IMO. I can see being offended by it, but not upset enough to lose “countless” nights of sleep over it.

What I find odd is her insistence that he be fired six (or is it four?) years after allegedly pinching her. If there were any disciplinary action that needed to be taken, who is she to demand that losing his job should be the punishment? Especially six or four years after?

And #metoo does not apply here. She is not a subordinate employee. There is no way that he could further her career. Just the opposite—one would think that Disney employees would be extra nice to podcasters.

The #metoo campaign was for ANYONE who has experienced sexual assault or harassment. It absolutely applies. Not sure where you got the idea that it was only for a boss/subordinate situation. That's just not true.

 

[AngiTN]

Thank you for clarifying, I wasnt sure the details.
I do think it is odd that an adult wouldn't say something, you don't need to be hostile either. You can do it without making a scene, tell him to find another place for his hand.
I get being caught off guard, and I could see a child freezing up in that moment, but a grown woman?
None of the ones I know would have let that move slide.

Same.
I can see if you don't want to make a scene, fine. It's very possible to put the man (or woman) in their place quietly. It doesn't take a scene. The person being grabbed can most certainly make the incident as quiet, or loud, as they are comfortable with at that time.

 

[Hikergirl]

We need to teach men not to sexually assault and harass people. It's like telling women to cover up more so that men won't rape them. Or, more realistically, will rape someone else instead of them.

Absolutely, but that doesn't mean we don't teach our daughters to be strong and speak if it happens. We can't control other people, I'm not going to rely on other people teaching their sons the right thing when it comes to my daughter.


The #metoo campaign was for ANYONE who has experienced sexual assault or harassment. It absolutely applies. Not sure where you got the idea that it was only for a boss/subordinate situation. That's just not true.

I don't consider a single butt pinch sexual assault or harassment. I consider it bad manners.

 

[AngiTN]

We need to teach men not to sexually assault and harass people. It's like telling women to cover up more so that men won't rape them. Or, more realistically, will rape someone else instead of them.

I am certain that goes without saying.
But, you are never going to stop 100% of the incidents. What's wrong with also empowering the offended person from speaking up?
And by the way, women can grope men too. So it can go both ways.

ETA - I'm going to assume that your mention of only teaching men to stop doesn't mean you condone women assaulting or harassing

 

[andrewilley]

While I am firmly of the opinion that Bob is not any sort of serial abuser, and I suspect that this incident was most likely an unfortunate misreading of a situation on her part (which Disney seem to have concluded at the time too, from what she has posted) I also don't think that vilifying Michelle is appropriate either.

I think she genuinely believes that what she posted is the actual true nature of the event, and it certainly felt that way to her at the time four (six?) years ago. I don't think she is making up an entire malicious fiction (as has been hinted here - why on earth would she?) but that she genuinely believes she has been wronged.

However, I do think this is all FAR too flimsy to start stirring up a social media frenzy aiming to destroy the reputation and career of someone of Bob's good standing for no other reason than you think (or even "know") that they felt your bum during a public photo shoot with 100 cameras in the room.

I would caution anyone against even questioning in the original Facebook thread as to whether this sort of public rallying call is a good idea based on just one Facebook post though - you will most likely get immediately crucified by an indignantly outraged mob. I just about got away with my life I think.

Andre

 

[texaslover]

I want to say first and foremost that I recognize that to have your butt, or any other part, grabbed/pinched or groped unwanted is never ok, in any circumstance. It shouldn't be accepted or brushed off as ok no matter who did it or how old the guy is (or gal)
But I also have to say, I can't imagine that it's so traumatic to any adult woman she can't stand to see a photo of it. I'm honestly asking any other adult women here, what your thought on that is. Could you really not even see a photo of a hand on your butt?

This was my thought. I'm really not trying to make light of other's feelings but I've had it happen and while I wasn't happy and told the person to back off I didn't even think about it again. Except for the time that Jamie Foxx did it in a club, then I bragged to everyone I knew .

 

[AngiTN]

While I am firmly of the opinion that Bob is not any sort of serial abuser, and I suspect that this incident was most likely an unfortunate misreading of a situation on her part (which Disney seem to have concluded at the time too, from what she has posted) I also don't think that vilifying Michelle is appropriate either.

I think she genuinely believes that what she posted is the actual true nature of the event, and it certainly felt that way to her at the time four (six?) years ago. I don't think she is making up an entire malicious fiction (as has been hinted here - why on earth would she?) but that she genuinely believes she has been wronged.

However, I do think this is all FAR too flimsy to start stirring up a social media frenzy aiming to destroy the reputation and career of someone of Bob's good standing for no other reason than you think (or even "know") felt your bum during a public photo shoot with 100 cameras in the room.

I would caution anyone against even questioning in the original Facebook thread as to whether this sort of public rallying call is a good idea based on just one Facebook post though - you will most likely get immediately crucified by an indignantly outraged mob. I just about got away with my life I think.

Andre

I have stated in the other thread that I can't fathom any malicious reason for her to make this up. I don't think she is doing this for a malicious reason. I'm at a loss as to why she's got this burr under her saddle though because the entire situation seems so out of proportion it's baffling.

 

[MrsDuck]

So is there a reason she still hasn't gone to the police?

 

[MJ6987]

While I am firmly of the opinion that Bob is not any sort of serial abuser, and I suspect that this incident was most likely an unfortunate misreading of a situation on her part (which Disney seem to have concluded at the time too, from what she has posted) I also don't think that vilifying Michelle is appropriate either.

I think she genuinely believes that what she posted is the actual true nature of the event, and it certainly felt that way to her at the time four (six?) years ago. I don't think she is making up an entire malicious fiction (as has been hinted here - why on earth would she?) but that she genuinely believes she has been wronged.

However, I do think this is all FAR too flimsy to start stirring up a social media frenzy aiming to destroy the reputation and career of someone of Bob's good standing for no other reason than you think (or even "know") felt your bum during a public photo shoot with 100 cameras in the room.

I would caution anyone against even questioning in the original Facebook thread as to whether this sort of public rallying call is a good idea based on just one Facebook post though - you will most likely get immediately crucified by an indignantly outraged mob. I just about got away with my life I think.

Andre

I saw that you got absolutely crucified by Michelle and others on Facebook for trying to bring some balance to the situation, similar to your post above, and were made to delete it! #jesuisbob

 

[Ajax]

I would caution anyone against even questioning in the original Facebook thread as to whether this sort of public rallying call is a good idea based on just one Facebook post though - you will most likely get immediately crucified by an indignantly outraged mob. I just about got away with my life I think.

Andre

I saw what happened to you, and it wasn't fair nor pretty. I suffered a similar fate when I suggested that Michelle should have her evidentiary ducks in a row, because YB's employment was at stake. I took a multi-post pounding, then was unceremoniously shown the door.

 

[Roxyfire]

The #metoo campaign was for ANYONE who has experienced sexual assault or harassment. It absolutely applies. Not sure where you got the idea that it was only for a boss/subordinate situation. That's just not true.

Bingo, I think people are losing sight in this monster of a thread. Now, let me preface this by stating I am speaking generally, and not about this case in specific. People have different thresholds of what they consider bothersome. I've had a lot of bad stuff happen to me, I still haven't felt the need to speak out about it. We can all say now behind our keyboards what we'd do if so-and-so did thus-and-such. But it's different in the moment. It's especially different if that person has a reputation for being a good person, a teacher, a pastor, a family man, etc. In my experience, that's what sticks with you not necessarily the incident itself. At the end of the day, everyone's line is different.

While I am firmly of the opinion that Bob is not any sort of serial abuser, and I suspect that this incident was most likely an unfortunate misreading of a situation on her part (which Disney seem to have concluded at the time too, from what she has posted) I also don't think that vilifying Michelle is appropriate either.

I think she genuinely believes that what she posted is the actual true nature of the event, and it certainly felt that way to her at the time four (six?) years ago. I don't think she is making up an entire malicious fiction (as has been hinted here - why on earth would she?) but that she genuinely believes she has been wronged.

However, I do think this is all FAR too flimsy to start stirring up a social media frenzy aiming to destroy the reputation and career of someone of Bob's good standing for no other reason than you think (or even "know") that they felt your bum during a public photo shoot with 100 cameras in the room.

I would caution anyone against even questioning in the original Facebook thread as to whether this sort of public rallying call is a good idea based on just one Facebook post though - you will most likely get immediately crucified by an indignantly outraged mob. I just about got away with my life I think.

Andre

Ouch, yeah I can see people feeling a little more than defensive, especially on social media. I will say I don't really know anything about Bob so I can't speak to that, but it's really important that people understand she's relating her perception of the events. However I really hate it when things turn into an echo chamber on either side and people get the pitchforks out. I applaud people who can speak out but I do hate the Internet sometimes when it gets out of hand.

 

[AliceAnn]

I'd be really unhappy if my adult friends just took a picture of my assault and/or later commented on it instead of helping me in the moment.

This is such a good point. Why not take that picture immediately to management? Maybe the friend didn’t think it was as big a deal as Michelle did.

 

[ashley0139]

I don't consider a single butt pinch sexual assault or harassment. I consider it bad manners.

Good for you. Fortunately or unfortunately, people feel differently about different things and you don't get to tell other people how to feel.

I am certain that goes without saying.
But, you are never going to stop 100% of the incidents. What's wrong with also empowering the offended person from speaking up?
And by the way, women can grope men too. So it can go both ways.

ETA - I'm going to assume that your mention of only teaching men to stop doesn't mean you condone women assaulting or harassing

Of course.

 

[LSUmiss]

No, it's my exact opinion. I realize that not everyone can or will do that and I feel bad/wrong for expecting that she should have done the same but seriously, to be so traumatized by a butt grab? A butt grab? Maybe I have the idea of a butt grab in my head all wrong. I'm 100% saying it's wrong for anyone to put their hands on someone else, male, female, and anything in between. If it's unwanted, it's unwanted. But I am having a hard time grouping a butt grab in the same sexual assault basket as say, what has happened to the poor girls on the US Gymnastics's team. I'm not sure what you can call a butt grab other than annoying and obscene but I can't call it assault. And I know, someone will say, well, it didn't happen to you. The person who it happened to can call it assault, so it is. And my response is, I guess. I guess that's where we are. Doesn't mean I have to think it's the right place to be.

And I know for darn sure we need to advocate for the grabee to speak up! Especially in a public environment when there are others around. I hope to goodness sake my DGD9, by the time she's an adult, will have enough wherewithall to be able to step away, push a hand away, and say stop that. I'll be doing my part to be sure she does. And I know for a fact my DD33 does. And I know for a fact that I would have at 20 and can at 54. And I know, what I would do doesn't matter

This will probably also be an unpopular opinion, but I’m of the opinion that to classify a butt grab as a traumatizing sexual assault minimizes more serious assaults so that ppl get tired of hearing about it & start ignoring all of it more than now. It’s important to communicate how wide spread these things are, BUT, if reports & allegations become so plentiful, ppl may become suspicious or just tired of hearing about it. It can’t become the next ice bucket challenge that everyone is doing or ppl won’t pay attention anymore & then the campaign has accomplished the opposite of what it set out to do.

 

[LSUmiss]

This is such a good point. Why not take that picture immediately to management? Maybe the friend didn’t think it was as big a deal as Michelle did.

Which is kinda where I think this is. Perhaps, it was unintentional & the pics show that? I firmly believe that if it’s true more ppl will come forward. A predator doesn’t do this one time.

 

[Hikergirl]

Good for you. Fortunately or unfortunately, people feel differently about different things and you don't get to tell other people how to feel.

Very true, but if one is going to share their feelings and their claims with the public, then they should be ready for the public to share their opinion of said claims.