WWYD? Neighbor issue

[kacaju]

So I was out all day yesterday, I come home and dh tells me the neighbors behind us had an all out screaming match. We do not know any of our neighbors that are behind us, we have no direct access to each others yards and there is 70 ft of greenland between us.

He said the woman was screaming her head off and she called the police on the husband. Police came and dh said they got quiet. DH said she was saying some really nasty stuff about him.

So today I am on the phone with my MIL and this woman starts to scream again. By the time I really realized what was going on and hung up with MIL she stopped.

WWYD in the future?? This is the first time I have ever heard anyone scream like that!! I never grew up hearing others arguments and I certainly do not want to start now!!

As I said, I have no idea who these people are, we ahve lived here for 13 years and NEVER had anything like tihs happen. If she starts in again, do I call the police? Today they seemed to quiet down fast, where yesterday dh said it was much worse.

So they had a fight these last two days, if this starts as a daily thing, do I call the police anytime they start in at each other? Do I ignore it and hope I don't see them on the evening news?

I am upset... honestly...as I said, I have never been put in this situation where I fear for others like this.

 

[kidzmom3]

unless you truly fear that someone is being harmed or a crime is being committed. Or, its very early or late in the day, I would not call the police.

 

[Jennasis]

Call the police each time. At best they are disturbing the peace...at worst it may be domestic violence.

 

[kacaju]

I drove out this evening to go get my daughter from youth group. Well, at least I know which house it is now. There is a house on the corner of the main road and the road behind us and there were 3 police cars outside and the dh was sitting on the grass near the curb.
I will be calling the police if I hear them.
They have a little girl who is probably 4 year old. I see the girl and the Mom outside doing yardwork in the nice weather when I drive past.

It is amazing to me how much her voice carried. We honestly thought they were right behind our house!

 

[luvsJack]

Well, that was two answers coming from completely opposite ends!

Do you know if these are same neighbors you have had all these years? If so and the fighting is completely new, I am not sure I would call the police every time.

I am a screamer. I don't get that mad very often, but have gotten angry enough at DH that we had a very loud yelling match. Our neighbors aren't close enough to hear, but if they were I would hope they wouldn't call the police.

I would think that you can tell the difference in a "someone is hurting me scream" and a "I am mad as hell" scream" If it seems to you to be the former, call the police. If the latter, don't unless they are really bothering you and your family.

 

[sorcerormickey]

Our ex-next door neighbors used to be like this....they would get into shouting matches in the middle of the night in their driveway - multiple times per week. Woke up all the neighbors. Either we would call the police, or someone else would. The fighting just escalated until it was him beating the tar out of her in the driveway. The police would always come and usually make him leave until the next day.....they have been gone for about 2years now (foreclosure), but I sometimes wonder about her and the kids, if they are OK.

Just keep calling the police...you never know what someone might do in the heat of the moment if it is that bad.

 

[dizluvah]

In my town - we have no noise ordinance so there is no "disturbing the peace" charge, although I understand our town is the exception rather than the rule.

If I heard screams of pain or sounds of violence (things breaking, thumps, groans) rather than yelling, I would call the police for fear that someone was being harmed. If I just hear two adults screaming at each other - I would mind my own business.

Also, it seems that since you keep seeing police cars - someone is calling the police; perhaps neighbors geographically closer to them.

 

[disykat]

I had neighbors once that I would hear yelling at each other occasionally in the summer when the windows were open. Not pleasant, but no big deal. I wasn't worried at all that they would hurt each other and it wasn't bad enough (or foul enough) for my kids to be frightened if they heard.

However, with what you are describing I would definitely call the police. There's a difference between a fight where voices are raised and an all-out screaming match.

 

[Ilike2Lurk]

I am a screamer. I don't get that mad very often, but have gotten angry enough at DH that we had a very loud yelling match. Our neighbors aren't close enough to hear, but if they were I would hope they wouldn't call the police.

I would think that you can tell the difference in a "someone is hurting me scream" and a "I am mad as hell" scream" If it seems to you to be the former, call the police. If the latter, don't unless they are really bothering you and your family.

Sorry, but if you are in my neighborhood and you are screaming so loudly at your DH that I can hear you, I will call the police each and every time

I don't want my neighborhood to be the trashy type where people think it is ok to verbally abuse one another so loudly that we can all hear it.

If you need to scream that way at "loved ones", please know it is not normal and I will not tolerate it.

 

[SwedishMeatball]

Sorry, but if you are in my neighborhood and you are screaming so loudly at your DH that I can hear you, I will call the police each and every time

I don't want my neighborhood to be the trashy type where people think it is ok to verbally abuse one another so loudly that we can all hear it.

If you need to scream that way at "loved ones", please know it is not normal and I will not tolerate it.

Did you just imply that another poster is "the trashy type" for being "a screamer"?? My Italian inlaws would be very offended.

 

[Ilike2Lurk]

unless you truly fear that someone is being harmed or a crime is being committed. Or, its very early or late in the day, I would not call the police.

Really?

Do you really want to live around people that scream so loudly you can hear it in your home? You are ok living around people with no common courtesy

I would never want to live in a neighborhood like that.

 

[Mickeyistheman]

So if you were living by me today you would have called the police on my mother and myself because she was screaming that I didn't know how to use the Oven Timer on our stove????

I agree with a few PP's sometimes people get mad and feel the need to yell. I would mind my own business and not call the police...however if I heard things breaking or worse like "Don't touch me" etc THEN I would call the police.

 

[Ilike2Lurk]

So if you were living by me today you would have called the police on my mother and myself because she was screaming that I didn't know how to use the Oven Timer on our stove????

I agree with a few PP's sometimes people get mad and feel the need to yell. I would mind my own business and not call the police...however if I heard things breaking or worse like "Don't touch me" etc THEN I would call the police.

If I can hear you in MY home, then it is my business. We don't scream. It is not productive. It is annoying. I don't like it. I don't want to hear out of control behavior in my home.

Mickeyistheman: I did read your earlier post about your mother and her lack of respect for you I know it bothers you greatly and I hope you can some day get the courage to walk away from a relationship that leaves you feeling so awful and sad.

If (and that is a Big If, as I think you were just giving a "what if" scenerio) I heard your mother screaming and screaming at you and it went on and on, I would contact the authorities. You may continue to put up with her abusive behavior, but your neighbors shouldn't have to do so.