Would You Sit at a Saved Table?

[Deb in IA]

I read the whole thread,

Wow, I applaud you !!!

And I LOVE the rules at your kids' school!!

 

[Tinker'n'Fun]

Wow, I applaud you !!!

And I LOVE the rules at your kids' school!!

Yeah, I guess it doesn't say much for my social life does it!

 

[Aisling]

Hey, has anyone seen the OP?

She's with me. We're going over passive/aggressive techniques that she should utilize in the future. I'm the Queen of P/A when it's called for.

 

[FireDancer]

She's with me. We're going over passive/aggressive techniques that she should utilize in the future. I'm the Queen of P/A when it's called for.

I recommend a passive aggressive prevention pachyderm. I hear they work wonders though they don't travel as well as one would hope. Well, unless they are the transportation I suppose.

 

[luvmy3]

Oh, I should mention I think it's great so many of you attended the concert. In our district, the attendance for concerts drops as the kids move from elementary to middle and then to high school. It's really sad.

Our district does pyramid concerts so all the levels play at the same one. My dd's was last night, and I love that they do it this way. Its amazing to see where they are when they begin in 5th grade to where they end in HS. I don't know about any other HS orchestra, but ours is phenomenal and I hope my kids stay with their instruments so they will play like that one day.

 

[MIGrandma]

She's with me. We're going over passive/aggressive techniques that she should utilize in the future. I'm the Queen of P/A when it's called for.

I can't believe this thread is still going, I just got caught up. I'm still here, but didn't have anything more to say on the subject. Some people have agreed with me, that they wouldn't sit at a table the obviously looked reserved, many others have not agreed with me and that's just fine. My skin has become a little bit thicker, after a few posters poked fun and tried to belittle me and make me look fooolish, and that's fine too. I know that's just the way it goes here so I shouldn't be surprised.

 

[kaytieeldr]

It's interesting that you comment on the results of this thread, including your feelings, but that you didn't and don't consider the feelings of a human being physically seated at a table where her only 'companions' were bookbags and drinks. You've also continued, through this entire thread, to fail to address that you had seats saved, not the entire table.

 

[MIGrandma]

It's interesting that you comment on the results of this thread, including your feelings, but that you didn't and don't consider the feelings of a human being physically seated at a table where her only 'companions' were bookbags and drinks. You've also continued, through this entire thread, to fail to address that you had seats saved, not the entire table.

Why should I comment on her sitting at the table when I've already expressed my opinion on that, several times in fact?

No, I didn't "fail to address" that I only had SEATS saved and not the TABLE. If my grandchildren had saved SEATS then their backpacks, drinks would be ON THE SEATS. They were ON THE TABLE, thus MY OPINION that the TABLE was saved, which I also have said several times.

There, did I make it clear enough for you?

 

[NaLisa]

Why should I comment on her sitting at the table when I've already expressed my opinion on that, several times in fact?

No, I didn't "fail to address" that I only had SEATS saved and not the TABLE. If my grandchildren had saved SEATS then their backpacks, drinks would be ON THE SEATS. They were ON THE TABLE, thus MY OPINION that the TABLE was saved, which I also have said several times.

There, did I make it clear enough for you?

So what, if anything, would you do differently next time?

 

[design_mom]

I can't believe this thread is still going, I just got caught up. I'm still here, but didn't have anything more to say on the subject. Some people have agreed with me, that they wouldn't sit at a table the obviously looked reserved, many others have not agreed with me and that's just fine. My skin has become a little bit thicker, after a few posters poked fun and tried to belittle me and make me look fooolish, and that's fine too. I know that's just the way it goes here so I shouldn't be surprised.

I am not sure that you "got" what most people were saying.

Regardless on individual feelings about whether it's acceptable to reserve that many seats at all, most people on this thread said they would *not* sit at a table that was "obviously reserved" as long as other seating was available. However, many people (me included) did *not* think that a couple of bookbags on the table made it "obvious" that the entire table was reserved. Obviously, there's a miscommunication with what you thought was conveyed by the bookbags and what apparently was communicated.

Perhaps next time, your DGS or DGD should pull a notebook out of their backpacks, write "THIS ENTIRE TABLE IS RESERVED. THANK YOU" on a sheet of paper and put *that* on the table instead. At least then it would be clear.

 

[MIGrandma]

So what, if anything, would you do differently next time?

Next time I would probably not go inside until DS was already there, since HE was the one who asked his children to save the table.

Or, I would smile politely at the woman sitting at the table and explain to her that my grandchildren had saved the table for us rather than thanking them for saving the table and "hoping" she would take the hint and move.

 

[happygirl]

Next time I would probably not go inside until DS was already there, since HE was the one who asked his children to save the table.

Or, I would smile politely at the woman sitting at the table and explain to her that my grandchildren had saved the table for us rather than thanking them for saving the table and "hoping" she would take the hint and move.

I don't see why she couldn't just sit with you all. Try to put yourself in her shoes.

 

[crashbb]

Why should I comment on her sitting at the table when I've already expressed my opinion on that, several times in fact?

No, I didn't "fail to address" that I only had SEATS saved and not the TABLE. If my grandchildren had saved SEATS then their backpacks, drinks would be ON THE SEATS. They were ON THE TABLE, thus MY OPINION that the TABLE was saved, which I also have said several times.

There, did I make it clear enough for you?

Yup. You made your self centerness perfectly clear. Thanks.

The PP was suggesting that you think about the feelings of the person sitting at the table. The one you tried to belittle with your passive-aggressive tactics. You know, maybe aknowledge that the way you went about things likely hurt her feelings. Currently, you've only aknowledge that the way you went about things may have been less than effective to suit YOUR purposes, with no thought to how they affected others.

 

[MIGrandma]

Yup. You made your self centerness perfectly clear. Thanks.

The PP was suggesting that you think about the feelings of the person sitting at the table. The one you tried to belittle with your passive-aggressive tactics. You know, maybe aknowledge that the way you went about things likely hurt her feelings. Currently, you've only aknowledge that the way you went about things may have been less than effective to suit YOUR purposes, with no thought to how they affected others.

Post #63

I did acknowledge that I went about it in the wrong way. Maybe you missed that one?

 

[crashbb]

You know, I think you are right about "talking over her" about how many seats we were going to need. I didn't want to actually come out and ask the woman to move, but in hindsight I know I should have just told her that the table was saved. And I do like your idea of tipping the chairs into the table, we'll remember that for next time.

Post #63

I did acknowledge that I went about it in the wrong way. Maybe you missed that one?

Nope I didn't miss it. Your posts says NOTHING about the feelings of the other person (or the fact that you tried to belittle her). Your posts only suggests that you would go about it a different way to get what YOU want (i.e. changing your tactis is for YOU, not for the other person). Perhaps that is not how you meant it, but that is how it comes across (especially since your last bit isn't about possibly sharing with but, instead, about how to make your saving more obvious).

 

[MIGrandma]

Nope I didn't miss it. Your posts says NOTHING about the feelings of the other person (or the fact that you tried to belittle her). Your posts only suggests that you would go about it a different way to get what YOU want (i.e. changing your tactis is for YOU, not for the other person). Perhaps that is not how you meant it, but that is how it comes across (especially since your last bit isn't about possibly sharing with but, instead, about how to make your saving more obvious).

As I said in a previous post way back....if it would have been just myself, my Mom and my DD I wouldn't have minded sharing the table with the woman AT ALL. In fact, I wouldn't have even given it a passing thought about her sitting at the table. If there were ONLY going to be the 3 of us at a table that seated 10, of COURSE the other seats would be open for ANYONE.

But. Since there would be 10 of us if DS/fiance would have brought her daughters, then I felt she should NOT have sat at the table since there were backpacks and drinks ON the table. At that point I didn't know if the girls were coming or not, but all of this I have said before.....

I just know that I myself would NOT sit at a table that had backpacks and drinks on it. I would know the table was already spoken for, and I would have chosen another table. And I still think she was wrong to sit down at the table, or at the very least to not move once she found out the table had been spoken for. That is how I feel about it, and I'm sorry if anyone thinks I'm wrong.

And this is the LAST time I'm going to defend my position on this thread.

I'm over this, and we DID enjoy the concert very much. Both grandchildren had solos, and DGD won the highest award given out to seniors and shared the honor with one of her best friends. And her Mother had won the same award back in 1992.

 

[ols386]

Good grief. I can't believe this thread is still going. Talk about beating a dead horse.

 

[focusondisney]

Well, I'm late to the thread. I'm always late to the good ones. Made it thru 8 pages already & wanted to respond to a few posts:

Not only that but nobody that was going to be sitting there had even arrived at the school yet. I could see if you were there and had to get up from the table to use the restroom, but to not even show up yet and expect a specific table saved when there are other people already there who may want to sit at that table? I don't get that at all

Me either!!

I guess I don't see a reason why a whole table full of people should have to move because one woman decided to sit at a table that was obviously saved. And I didn't want to move because DS had specifically asked his kids to save the table they did, as they had saved it for us many other times (with no problems) and being this is DS's DD's last concert since she is a senior and will be graduating in two weeks. DS barely had time to drive home from work, take a shower and get to the concert.

If I had been the woman, I never would have sat at a saved table, or even if I did and then the people came I would at least ask, politely (not crabby like she did) if they were going to need the entire table. If they weren't sure, I still would have moved. Oh well, like I said in the end it worked out okay but I was just curious to see other opinions on what they would do in this same situation.

1. Because nobody challenged your family on this before doesn't make you right.
2. Because the woman didn't act the way you would have doesn't make her wrong.

You people must not ever go to school events, dance recitals, show choir competitions etc.

I rarely walk into any kid event that doesn't have whole tables saved or whole rows in auditoriums. I never even think about sitting in a saved seat or at a saved table. It is sometimes hard for an entire family to get to the event at the same time and the kids that put down their backpacks (or whatever) are usually required to be with the rest of the group performing.

I get there early and get the seat(s) I want/need. MAYBE if there were absolutely no other seats in the place, I might sit at the table.

Yep, I've been to plenty of school events. I've gotten to them 30 -45 minutes early to get parking & seats . Matter of fact , by 30 mins early , both of those are limited. If I can get myself there early, why should I be forced to sit in the last row so someone else can show up as the event starts & get a front row seat?

Only one reason I'm glad my kids are grown & I don't have to deal with this nonsense anymore. Not looking forward to that when I have grands!

 

[SaraJayne]

As I said in a previous post way back....if it would have been just myself, my Mom and my DD I wouldn't have minded sharing the table with the woman AT ALL. In fact, I wouldn't have even given it a passing thought about her sitting at the table. If there were ONLY going to be the 3 of us at a table that seated 10, of COURSE the other seats would be open for ANYONE.

But. Since there would be 10 of us if DS/fiance would have brought her daughters, then I felt she should NOT have sat at the table since there were backpacks and drinks ON the table. At that point I didn't know if the girls were coming or not, but all of this I have said before.....

I just know that I myself would NOT sit at a table that had backpacks and drinks on it. I would know the table was already spoken for, and I would have chosen another table. And I still think she was wrong to sit down at the table, or at the very least to not move once she found out the table had been spoken for. That is how I feel about it, and I'm sorry if anyone thinks I'm wrong.

And this is the LAST time I'm going to defend my position on this thread.

I'm over this, and we DID enjoy the concert very much. Both grandchildren had solos, and DGD won the highest award given out to seniors and shared the honor with one of her best friends. And her Mother had won the same award back in 1992.

You still don't get it.

 

[ols386]

As I said in a previous post way back....if it would have been just myself, my Mom and my DD I wouldn't have minded sharing the table with the woman AT ALL. In fact, I wouldn't have even given it a passing thought about her sitting at the table. If there were ONLY going to be the 3 of us at a table that seated 10, of COURSE the other seats would be open for ANYONE.

But. Since there would be 10 of us if DS/fiance would have brought her daughters, then I felt she should NOT have sat at the table since there were backpacks and drinks ON the table. At that point I didn't know if the girls were coming or not, but all of this I have said before.....

I just know that I myself would NOT sit at a table that had backpacks and drinks on it. I would know the table was already spoken for, and I would have chosen another table. And I still think she was wrong to sit down at the table, or at the very least to not move once she found out the table had been spoken for. That is how I feel about it, and I'm sorry if anyone thinks I'm wrong.

And this is the LAST time I'm going to defend my position on this thread.

I'm over this, and we DID enjoy the concert very much. Both grandchildren had solos, and DGD won the highest award given out to seniors and shared the honor with one of her best friends. And her Mother had won the same award back in 1992.

That's great!! You must have been very proud.