Would you let a 14 year old babysit a 4 month old baby?

[mfd25wife]

A new parent does not automatically turn into a superpower who can dodge all emergencies and just know everything. They learn. It's odd to me that this 14 yr old has had classes in babysitting and has watched a 6 month old baby already is being judged as incapable strictly on age. Most new parents haven't had Red Cross training. When I was a new parent, my knowledge only came from babysitting, with no classes. The hospital didn't hesitate to hand me my baby to take home. I also was babysitting infants at 13. Toddlers were when I was 12.

 

[J3nn78]

No way. My third baby is almost 4 months. I only trust my mom with my kids while they are babies. Once they are around a year, I let me MIL and sister watch them too. But my mom is the only one I feel 100% comfortable with. Anyone else and I am a nervous wreck while we are out.

 

[indimom]

Actually, often a parent is one of the worst peopel in such situations--they are too close and becomemmoblized with fear. Once again, it really goes back to the individual personality as much as anything.

A new parent does not automatically turn into a superpower who can dodge all emergencies and just know everything. They learn. It's odd to me that this 14 yr old has had classes in babysitting and has watched a 6 month old baby already is being judged as incapable strictly on age. Most new parents haven't had Red Cross training. When I was a new parent, my knowledge only came from babysitting, with no classes. The hospital didn't hesitate to hand me my baby to take home. I also was babysitting infants at 13. Toddlers were when I was 12.

I agree. There is no way to know who might panic in an emergency.

There are occasions when PARENTS have panicked in emergencies. Therre have been occasions when TEENS have responded admirably.
Take the recent theatre shooting:

Kaylan, a 13-year-old girl who was eager to see "The Dark Knight Rises" on opening night at the Aurora, Colo., Century 16 theater, did not know that the fateful midnight showing would change her life.

The teenage girl, whose last name has been withheld, attempted CPR to save 6-year-old Veronica Moser-Sullivan, who was shot in the theater masacre, according to NBC News.

A father has told how he managed to escape the Dark Knight Rises shooting - but was horrified to realise he had lost his four-month old son on the floor of the theatre in the chaos.

The infant was rescued by his mother who had a shrapnel wound to her leg but still managed to drag the child and their four-year-old daughter to safety.

Jarell Brooks, 18yo, was also shot while shielding and assisting the mother and children in their escape.

In no way am I saying parents SHOULD use a teen for child care if they are uncomfortable with that idea. But, it is wrong to make an automatic assumption than an adult will always behave better and quicker under adverse circumstances. I think that is a quality people are born with. Some people panic, some people respond. And there is no way of knowing who those people are in advance.

 

[bittybabygrower]

We had 13 and 14 year old baby sitters and my kids loved them because they would play with them. They both had passed the Red Cross babysitting classes and knew CPR. More than most adults I know. My kids went to that class also and started babysitting at 12. They took care of some babies that were 4 months and older and did fine. My DD has been watching the same kids for 5 years now and they are alive lol

I think it depends on the kid. I first had them come over and be a mothers helper, paid them for being here, to see how they were with mt kids. I only had one I had reservations about, so I didn't use her.

 

[torinsmom]

I think the reason I would trust an 14 year old less than an adult is because their brains have not completely developed. Their reactions can be very different from an adult in the same situation. It really does depend on the child though---and yes, a 14 year old is still a child.

 

[aristocatz]

A new parent does not automatically turn into a superpower who can dodge all emergencies and just know everything. They learn. It's odd to me that this 14 yr old has had classes in babysitting and has watched a 6 month old baby already is being judged as incapable strictly on age. Most new parents haven't had Red Cross training. When I was a new parent, my knowledge only came from babysitting, with no classes. The hospital didn't hesitate to hand me my baby to take home. I also was babysitting infants at 13. Toddlers were when I was 12.

I have to say I was really impressed with this! I've had CPR training at work for toddlers, but otherwise my DH & I have just been learning along the way & hoping we don't ask too many dumb questions or screw up! We actually signed up for an all day "Babies 101" class at the hospital, but I ended up in the hospital almost induced the day of the class, due to some complications, so we never got to take the class.

 

[torinsmom]

I have to say I was really impressed with this! I've had CPR training at work for toddlers, but otherwise my DH & I have just been learning along the way & hoping we don't ask too many dumb questions or screw up! We actually signed up for an all day "Babies 101" class at the hospital, but I ended up in the hospital almost induced the day of the class, due to some complications, so we never got to take the class.

Shoot, try and become a foster parent. 3 months of classes, background checks, fingerprints, certification by the fire marshall, monthly visits and home inspections from social services, CPR and first aid certification, etc. I'm amazed my child lasted a month since I didn't have any of this before I brought him home

 

[aristocatz]

Shoot, try and become a foster parent. 3 months of classes, background checks, fingerprints, certification by the fire marshall, monthly visits and home inspections from social services, CPR and first aid certification, etc. I'm amazed my child lasted a month since I didn't have any of this before I brought him home

I hear ya & God bless you for it as well! I have several friends who currently foster (and 2 who have gone from foster to the adoption process) & it amazes me how much they have to go through to ensure they are proper parents...... and after all that, the child ends up being put back with the drug addict mother they were taken from (who isn't expected to take any of these classes or certifications....

Sorry I got off on a tangent.... I know not all bio parents are like that. This is just the experience a few of my friends are going through....

 

[Fly4free]

Just an update that we decided to give the 14 year old babysitter a try and I am feeling 100% comfortable with the situation.

It turns out she completed a babysitting certification class at our local hospital (I didn't even know this existed!). I was pretty impressed with this. In addition, her mom is going to accompany her this time & stay in another room while her daughter babysits my baby girl. That way her daughter is in charge, but my friend is there in the background just in case she runs into any difficulty. I really like this idea & I'm so excited to finally have a little date with my DH!!!

People at work keep telling me it's really important to maintain a "date night" after your first baby is born, but DH & I just haven't been able to do that. I don't really feel the need to do this every week, but once a month would be really nice. As much as I adore my baby girl, it will be nice to sneak away with my DH for a few hours

Great Idea! Sounds like the best of both worlds. You can relax and enjoy a night out with your hubby and baby is safe and getting to know the new sitter. I started sitting by age 12, but I'm not sure when I started watching infants, probably close to that age. If the 14 yo is mature I see no reason to not use her especially if you have "backup" close by.

I would try to have her come over sometimes as a mothers helper too. You stick close in another part of the house or make a run to the local grocery store. See how she interacts with your baby. I did this with my babysitter after I had baby #2. I wasn't comfortable leaving her very early on with a newborn but needed some extra help.

One of my biggest regrets is not making more time with DH when the kids were little. Our relationship suffered because of it. I'm now realizing again what I missed. Fortunately now my Kids are old enough I don't need sitters. Time flies! Enjoy your little one because they sure do grow fast!

 

[mjkacmom]

Actually, often a parent is one of the worst people in such situations--they are too close and become immoblized with fear. Once again, it really goes back to the individual personality as much as anything.

Lol - this is so true! In an emergency, I think my kids would be better off with a 14 year old - I'm the worst! Thankfully, DH is great, and very calm. He has taken kids to the ER without me - it's better for everyone involved. Especially if it's something gross, like a torn-off toenail - go find daddy!

 

[wvjules]

OP, is her mom going to be there everytime she babysits or just the first time?

Also, I would recommend both you and your DH taking an infant CPR Class. When my DD was a 6 days old she started choking (turned out to be reflux) but I had NO IDEA what to do. We signed up for the CPR class the next day.

BTW, since the 14 year old does have training she's actually more qualified than most adult babysitters.

 

[KiKi Mouse]

Depends on the 14 y/o and it depends on the baby.

Depends how where I would be going and for how long.

Does the 14 y/o know how to deal with emergencies? What if the infant cries the entire time you are gone. Is the 14 y/o going to deal with that appropriately?

 

[MichelleVW]

Does the 14 y/o know how to deal with emergencies? What if the infant cries the entire time you are gone. Is the 14 y/o going to deal with that appropriately?

There are many adults that don't deal with that appropriately.

 

[KiKi Mouse]

OK, I'll bite: What emergency to you anticipate with a 4 month old baby? The only one I can think of are out of the blue medical emergencies that having a parent around wouldn't be very helpful for either.

Besides, if you actually read all the responses, you'll find the 14-year-old's mom will be THERE in the NEXT ROOM.

The funny funny thing to me is back in the day when people had 6 kids, the 14-year-olds WERE taking care of the babies.

Choking, respiratory emergencies due to too many blankets etc., brain injuries due to falling off a bed etc., SIDS.

I work in an EMS environment and those are a few that I can think of off the top of my head.

 

[KiKi Mouse]

There are many adults that don't deal with that appropriately.

Yes there are planty of adults that cannot handle a gassy crying infant.

However we are talking about a teenaged girl. It would depend on the teenager. Just like adults some of them are better equipped to deal with the stress of looking after babies.

 

[MichelleVW]

Yes there are planty of adults that cannot handle a gassy crying infant.

However we are talking about a teenaged girl. It would depend on the teenager. Just like adults some of them are better equipped to deal with the stress of looking after babies.

I don't think people give teenagers enough credit. If this 14 year old WANTS to babysit an infant then it's my guess she can handle it. I was that 14 year old that loved to be around babies and while I"m glad I didn't have a baby at 14 I'm quite certain that I would have been just as good as a parent at 14 as I was 9 years later when I finally had one of my own.

 

[KiKi Mouse]

I don't think people give teenagers enough credit. If this 14 year old WANTS to babysit an infant then it's my guess she can handle it. I was that 14 year old that loved to be around babies and while I"m glad I didn't have a baby at 14 I'm quite certain that I would have been just as good as a parent at 14 as I was 9 years later when I finally had one of my own.

Like I have said, it depends on the teenager. They're not all 14 y/o's are the same. Just because one may want to babysit doesn't necessarily mean they are equipped to deal with it. I live in a different world than a lot of people because I see things happen every day that people would never think could happen.

 

[MichelleVW]

Like I have said, it depends on the teenager. They're not all 14 y/o's are the same. Just because one may want to babysit doesn't necessarily mean they are equipped to deal with it. I live in a different world than a lot of people because I see things happen every day that people would never think could happen.

I worked in a hospital for 20 years, so yes..I know things can happen. But the OP has the mom of the 14 for back up, so in the case of this thread I don't see any problem with the 14 year old babysitting.

 

[wvjules]

Like I have said, it depends on the teenager. They're not all 14 y/o's are the same. Just because one may want to babysit doesn't necessarily mean they are equipped to deal with it. I live in a different world than a lot of people because I see things happen every day that people would never think could happen.

In this case, the babysitter is equipped. She's been trained by professionals. She's probably more equipped than the mother.

 

[aristocatz]

OP, is her mom going to be there everytime she babysits or just the first time?

Also, I would recommend both you and your DH taking an infant CPR Class. When my DD was a 6 days old she started choking (turned out to be reflux) but I had NO IDEA what to do. We signed up for the CPR class the next day.

BTW, since the 14 year old does have training she's actually more qualified than most adult babysitters.

We are starting off with just this one time to see how it goes. Not sure what we will do for future occasions.

Yes, I agree and we are definitely going to look into signing up for an infant CPR class. We have watched a few Youtube videos on Infant CPR, but a full class would be better.