Would you go????

[lovin diz]

There is a family that we are friends with--2 sisters, and a brother--Dh has known them all of his life; they grew up together. Well YEARS ago one of the sisters became a junkie, and did some things to dh and i, and we pretty much cut ties with her. Well, yesterday this other sister passed away unexpectedly. She was 36 y.o., and had 2 young sons. The sis that we have the problem with called to let us know, and pretty much asked us to go be with them during this time, and go to their home afterwards. Dh and i dont know if we should or not. We know she hasnt changed any, and dont want to rehash things, until we are 100% sure she has changed....Would you even go to the funeral??

 

[java]

Funerals are for the living- to give support and compassion to those left behind imho.
So if you have any feelings for her children, or her brother or even the junkie sister you should go.
Why not just go to the wake. no back to the house stuff.

 

[FayeW]

Of course you should go. She's not asking you to move in with her and be her new best friend. I would think you would want to go to pay respects to your deceased friend and her family. Doing anything else would be petty and spiteful.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I would not make it about someone else. If my dh and I feel the need to go we would despite the past.

It is about closure and support. You need to do what you feel is right.

Whether that is to go or not is 100% up to you guys.

 

[okeydokey]

Yes, I would go. You don't need to re-start a relationship with the sister, but just offer some support to the rest of the family.

 

[Metro West]

Maybe you should go to the Family Night to give your support and to show the rest of the family you're thinking of them? That's what I would do.

 

[Lynn CC]

I would go to the wake and funeral but not back to the house

 

[shirleyb]

Yes, I would go.

 

[mnasmom3]

I would go to the funeral and go with an open mind. I'd decide there if going to their home was an option for me.

 

[Erin1700]

Certainly go to the funeral and wake. I would probably not go to the house.