Would you ever trade in your engagement ring for a different one?

[maslex]

I've never really thought of doing it. But I know a girl at work did (actually twice, I believe)

And now, my sister in law just did this over the weekend. She was previously married (very young) and her ex-husband got her a ring with a very tiny diamond. Now while I personally could care less about the size of a diamond, I know that she did (and does to this day). So when she got engaged the second time (to her current hubby) he bought a very beautiful ring. I believe it had a 1/3-1/2 carot, marquis diamond in the middle with a diamond on each side. Simply beautiful!!! She's had that now for about 9 years or so (been married since 2003, engaged maybe a year or two before hand).

Over the years, she's always talked about getting a "round" solitare diamond (the kind she's always wanted). Well, she's finally got the ring she's always wanted. She was able to buy a stone off of her friend (a full carot solitare) and she now put it in a setting.

So I'm just wondering if you've "traded" up your ring or traded it in for something different? I'm not sure if I would ever do it but then again, maybe I would? Hubby said he wouldn't have a problem with it but if I did trade it in for something different, I wouldn't want him to feel like I don't like my ring now. What are your thoughts?

 

[Hoodie]

I love my diamond but have never loved the setting. I've thought about asking DH for a new setting for our 10 year anniversary (depending on financial status!)

I don't like marquis cut diamonds either so I can definitely see trading it in/up for a round one. I don't think I could part with the original stone though, even if I didn't like it. I'd want it incorporated into the new setting or made into a necklace or something.

 

[SC Minnie]

My rings were 'lost' when we were moving (I think they were stolen but can't prove it ). I did get them replaced and DH told me I could get anything I wanted. We had been married about 7 years. I told him I wanted the same thing I had before since that is what he gave me. We ended up getting the same kind of setting (little bigger stones ). Yes, its a little dated now but so are we.

 

[tlbwriter]

If I had a lot of money and nothing better to do with it, I'd have my small diamond put in a ring with larger stones. But I don't.

 

[lakelandgal70]

Yeah I guess you could say I traded up. My original wedding set got mangled by a foster dog. I always put my wedding ring on our dresser and for some reason this dang dog jumped up and got a hold of it. Bent it way beyond repair so for many months I just wore a cheap silver wedding band. Then hubby surprised me with a beautiful pear shaped blue sapphire with diamonds on both sides and a beautiful diamond band to go with it. I get many compliments on it and just love the color. Often think about trading it for a Tiffany band ring so not sure if that would be trading down or up haha

 

[FlightlessDuck]

If there is nothing wrong with the one you have (ie, lost, stolen, eaten), I think it's rather rude to replace it.

 

[YodaGirl]

Nope. I love my wedding set.

I have had to use a different set that is sized larger so that I can wear it during pregnancies, but I always miss my original one.

I will say that I did get a larger solitaire once before (kept my original), but after not very long at all, we traded it in for a past/present/future ring. It may be smaller, but I'm partial to the original one.

 

[krcit]

I started wearing my mom's rings a few years ago because she gave them to me and I just love them so much. Since then I have misplaced my own set Anyway, to answer your question. Yes, I would trade my ring if money wsn't an object.

 

[Andtototoo]

Personally, it's a tough call for me. We couldn't afford an engagement ring and without a ring, my dh felt a formal proposal was anti-climatic. I don't have a sentimental/romantic memory through which a ring presentation is inextricably woven. So the following is an intellectual exercise for me:

I can definitely see a hesitation in changing a ring that is an essential part of a life-changing moment. I can also imagine having a sentimental attachment ot a ring that a husband thoughtfully chose for his intended or one that is a family heirloom.

That said, I also know from my own experiences in bridal and from a friend who worked in a jewelry store that a lot of guys put little to no thought into the ring purchase. (She hears a lot of, "What's the biggest rock X dollars will get me?" Or "What's the most popular ring?" Or "What do you think she'd like?") So if I had an idea that my dh had put less effort into picking my ring than he does ordering off the menu at McDonald's, then I wouldn't hesitate to choose something more to my taste.

I can also see not liking the ring and not wanting to wear it because it's not your taste. For example, I don't like round solitaires, so I'd hate to have to wear one every day. I really don't like my mother's engagement ring at ALL and if my dh had given me one that looked like that, I think I might have actually asked him to exchange it for something else before the wedding even happened, because...yuck! I would never want my dh to wear something he hated every day simply because I got it for him.

From what I'm hearing, it's common for women to dislike their engagement rings. My dd is friendly with a number of young women who have gotten engaged in the last few years and dislike their rings to the point where my dd said to me, "When the time comes, I'm going to tell my boyfriend he has to take you with him to pick out a ring."

I think part of the deal is that in the past, it seems like most people got a solitaire of some kind -- that was the fashion, it was expected, there was no issue of personal taste involved. And a large diamond was simply not done either because it was considered "bad taste" or because our culture frowned on "regular" people spending that much money on a bauble. Today, bigger is better and a ring is supposed to be all about being a symbolof the unique personal relationship and about reflecting personal taste -- that makes it much harder to get it "right".

 

[Mama-san]

Nope. Mine is a 1 carat pear shaped solitaire and I love it. Someday I would like to get a wrap to go with it, but I would never replace the original.

 

[Christine]

If there is nothing wrong with the one you have (ie, lost, stolen, eaten), I think it's rather rude to replace it.

I pretty much feel this way.

I got married VERY young and we had no money. My "diamond is basically a chip and it's all he could afford at the time. He picked it out and was very proud. I mean how cold is that to say, "ah, it's not "me" anymore, not big enough or flashy enough so I want a new engagement ring?" Well in my book, it's not an engagement ring anymore. The first ring is the engagement ring.

Losing a ring or having one destroyed is an entirely different matter.

I know a guy who took painstaking efforts to pick out an engagment ring he though his bride-to-be would love. Did lots of studying/research on quality, stressed over the style, etc. Ten years later she admits that the ring is okay but she never really loved it and wants a new one. I know it bugs him.

 

[disykat]

DH and I picked out my ring together so it was my choice. I don't think it would hurt his feelings at all if I wanted to change it.

I actually rarely wear my ring and wear a thin band instead. Sometimes I even take that off. I don't enjoy wearing jewelry and, if the ring wasn't such a huge symbol of being married, would prefer not to wear a ring. I've been tempted to sell my ring and use it for something more meaningful to me - maybe a vacation!

 

[MichelleVW]

If there is nothing wrong with the one you have (ie, lost, stolen, eaten), I think it's rather rude to replace it.

I don't think it's rude at all. Nothing wrong with upgrading to something nicer when you can afford it.

I personally love my ring and would never want a different one...but that's because it was my second marriage and is EXACTLY the ring I always wanted.

 

[englishteacha]

When DH and I renewed our vows I got a new ring. I still have my original set, but I LOVE my new one. It's the one I had always wanted. After baby arrives, I would like to get my original set sized to wear on my right hand.

 

[ccgirl]

I've never really thought of doing it. But I know a girl at work did (actually twice, I believe)

And now, my sister in law just did this over the weekend. She was previously married (very young) and her ex-husband got her a ring with a very tiny diamond. Now while I personally could care less about the size of a diamond, I know that she did (and does to this day). So when she got engaged the second time (to her current hubby) he bought a very beautiful ring. I believe it had a 1/3-1/2 carot, marquis diamond in the middle with a diamond on each side. Simply beautiful!!! She's had that now for about 9 years or so (been married since 2003, engaged maybe a year or two before hand).

Over the years, she's always talked about getting a "round" solitare diamond (the kind she's always wanted). Well, she's finally got the ring she's always wanted. She was able to buy a stone off of her friend (a full carot solitare) and she now put it in a setting.

So I'm just wondering if you've "traded" up your ring or traded it in for something different? I'm not sure if I would ever do it but then again, maybe I would? Hubby said he wouldn't have a problem with it but if I did trade it in for something different, I wouldn't want him to feel like I don't like my ring now. What are your thoughts?

Would I, absolutely not. My DH purchased the ring he could afford at the time. I am not materialistic and don't care what it looked/looks like. It makes me smile every time I look at it! Could we afford a bigger one now; absolutely. But, it wouldn't be my engagment ring, it would just be a diamond ring. My DH knew how I felt so for our 10th anniversary he got me a wrap for my engagment. He knew I would never want a different engagement ring. YMMV.

 

[tlbwriter]

Personally, it's a tough call for me. We couldn't afford an engagement ring and without a ring, my dh felt a formal proposal was anti-climatic. I don't have a sentimental/romantic memory through which a ring presentation is inextricably woven. So the following is an intellectual exercise for me:

Yeah, I feel the same way (not about the proposal being anticlimactic, but about the lack of sentiment attached to the ring). We'd been engaged for quite some time and were shopping for wedding rings when DH decided I needed an engagement ring, so we bought one. That's why I'd consider remaking it (using the same gold and stone) if we were rolling in dough. But it's definitely not a high (or even medium) priority for me.

My wedding ring, on the other hand, is a plain gold band that holds the greatest of sentimental value and will never be replaced.

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

I pretty much feel this way.

I got married VERY young and we had no money. My "diamond is basically a chip and it's all he could afford at the time. He picked it out and was very proud. I mean how cold is that to say, "ah, it's not "me" anymore, not big enough or flashy enough so I want a new engagement ring?" Well in my book, it's not an engagement ring anymore. The first ring is the engagement ring.

Losing a ring or having one destroyed is an entirely different matter.

I know a guy who took painstaking efforts to pick out an engagment ring he though his bride-to-be would love. Did lots of studying/research on quality, stressed over the style, etc. Ten years later she admits that the ring is okay but she never really loved it and wants a new one. I know it bugs him.

This is pretty much now I feel. I just think that the original engagement ring IS "the" engagement ring. If I wanted another ring, then I'd just get another ring, but for me, it would be just another ring. What works for other people is fine by me.

On our first Christmas together, I misplaced my wedding band. Searched through tons of wrapping paper and boxes; finally found it stuck in the corner of my pants pocket. But my MIL said to me before I found it "Good thing it's not your diamond!" Even though my engagement ring cost more, it was the wedding band that sealed the deal and was of more importance to me.

 

[Shanna-like-Banana]

Yes, me, I'm guilty of it ..

DH picked out my wedding ring/engagement ring. They interlock.

While I was wearing the engagement ring part of it, it looked really akward. We were married 10 days later.

He picked it out on his own, w/o any imput from me what-so-ever.

It's not that it used to be me, it's that it never was me, and never was going to be. It really looked more like a coctail ring than a wedding ring.

At our 5 years, we moved back to stateside and he let me pick out a beautiful ring that I love.

It's very simple and elegant, I don't need an arm sling to wear it.

We choose the 3 ring setting, at the time was called The Past, Present and Future style.

But on the contrary, he's gotten a new ring too. While in the field he put medical tape over his finger and when he took it off, the "solid gold band" peeled right off ! Needless to say that puppy went right back .

 

[luvmy3]

I am guilty of trading up. I love my engagement ring, its a 1/3 carat pear shaped solitare, very modest but its definitely "me". I would love to have the diamond reset into a pendant, just haven't gotten around to it.
When they came out with the past present future rings I fell in love so for Christmas dh bought me one. It has just as much sentimental value as my engagement ring, it was the year our 3rd child was born, so the 3 large diamonds represent them. It was also our 9th year of marriage, so the 9 total diamonds in the ring represent that.I wear it everyday under my wedding band.

 

[Crystal824]

No, I would never "upgrade" my wedding set. I love it. It isn't huge, but it isn't really small either. We got married in our late 20s both professionals. I love my set. If I got another ring, it would just be another ring to me.