Would you bother?

[Dug720]

I edited my post to clarify - they can't give out specific info. Now, a general "I'm on (insert social media here)" that can happen.

Well, they CAN give mailing addresses to personal friends and family. Otherwise they would never get any mail from home.

But to a random guest, that would be weird.

And I agree. If the CM did not give social media contacts to the "friend" in their interactions then I think it is safe to assume said CM is not interested. And if there was no personal interaction at all...that is IMHO creepy and approaching stalkerish.

 

[wcw57]

CREEEEEEEPEEEEEEEEEE!!!

 

[PrincessShmoo]

Well, they CAN give mailing addresses to personal friends and family. Otherwise they would never get any mail from home.

But to a random guest, that would be weird.

And I agree. If the CM did not give social media contacts to the "friend" in their interactions then I think it is safe to assume said CM is not interested. And if there was no personal interaction at all...that is IMHO creepy and approaching stalkerish.

Well, yes. But we were talking here about CMs providing personal contact info for random guests.

 

[Dug720]

Well, yes. But we were talking here about CMs providing personal contact info for random guests.

Exactly.

 

[bbel]

As a CM I was always 'strongly' encouraged not to keep contact with guests after the cruise.
Obviously this can't always be exclusive as many CMs have friends and family sail, and they're going to have contact...
I know there are a number of crew members who are friends online with guests (see them in photos and posts or whatever), but how do I know they don't know them from 'land life'?

 

[StitchesGr8Fan]

I wouldn't. There is a good possibility the lifeguard gives the same level of interaction to people on every ship.

 

[Racer X]

FWIW we had a great time with our servers on the Fantasy a few years ago and he happily gave us his email address to stay in touch.

 

[Sanchez]

FWIW we had a great time with our servers on the Fantasy a few years ago and he happily gave us his email address to stay in touch.

Was it offered without request or did you ask? If the latter you likely put the server in a position where they have difficulty saying no. They are there to work for you and have to be nice. That is certainly not the foundation for a friendship nor can I understand why any passenger would seek out such a relationship. It is at worst creepy and at best patronizing.

 

[IRLdisneyprincess]

CREEEEEEEPEEEEEEEEEE!!!

I don't really see how it's creepy? Sometimes people do have missed connections.

I don't see how trying to get in touch with this person is stalkerish or creepy. There's a way to go about it respectfully. And even if nothing comes from it, I'm certain that this lifeguard person would probably be flattered.

And it's most likely that OP's friend isn't weird, just a person wondering if there's a connection/missed opportunity.

 

[Dug720]

I don't really see how it's creepy? Sometimes people do have missed connections.

I don't see how trying to get in touch with this person is stalkerish or creepy. There's a way to go about it respectfully. And even if nothing comes from it, I'm certain that this lifeguard person would probably be flattered.

And it's most likely that OP's friend isn't weird, just a person wondering if there's a connection/missed opportunity.

The wording does not indicate a "missed connection". It indicates the "friend" thought the CM was hot. Big difference.

 

[IRLdisneyprincess]

The wording does not indicate a "missed connection". It indicates the "friend" thought the CM was hot. Big difference.

Whatever you want to call it, the friend is clearly interested. As to the friends' intentions, well, I obviously don't know for certain but in my opinion it doesn't sound creepy or totally out of line. You meet people on vacation, you may or may not find them attractive or to be interesting and you might want to get to know them.

I just think it's uncalled for to start calling them a stalker lol. They don't really meet the criteria. I doubt they are following this person 24/7 or have made a shrine of them in their closet.

Sorry, maybe it's the fact that I listen to a lot of true crime podcasts with people who are actually stalking and harming people that makes me tsk tsk at this.

OP, tell your friend that you only live once. If they tried to contact/approach this CM in a respectful way, I'm sure it would be fine. The worst they can do is say they're not interested. That's just the gamble you take

 

[Allison]

Never.

 

[Dug720]

Whatever you want to call it, the friend is clearly interested. As to the friends' intentions, well, I obviously don't know for certain but in my opinion it doesn't sound creepy or totally out of line. You meet people on vacation, you may or may not find them attractive or to be interesting and you might want to get to know them.

I just think it's uncalled for to start calling them a stalker lol. They don't really meet the criteria. I doubt they are following this person 24/7 or have made a shrine of them in their closet.

Sorry, maybe it's the fact that I listen to a lot of true crime podcasts with people who are actually stalking and harming people that makes me tsk tsk at this.

OP, tell your friend that you only live once. If they tried to contact/approach this CM in a respectful way, I'm sure it would be fine. The worst they can do is say they're not interested. That's just the gamble you take

IF there was meaningful interaction and the CM had wanted to maintain contact, they could have given a signal and contact information. If that signal and info was not given, it is a pretty safe bet the CM has no interest.

But. Nothing in the post suggests the OP (sorry, the "friend") had any contact with the person besides finding them attractive.

If someone I never interacted with started trying to contact me, I would find that totally creepy. And it would NOT make me want to have any more to do with them.

 

[hanscarlet]

I can see it being innocent enough to not be creepy but one should have a little social EQ to know that they people are paid to make you feel happy. If one goes out of their way to contact a person who literally is paid to make them feel happy... it's a little odd, maybe just sign up for a therapist and talk it out or something.... or sign up for match.com....it just kind of smells a bit desperate.

 

[LSUfan4444]

OP, go for it. I have no clue how to tell you to go about doing it but who am I (or anyone else here) to advise you to not follow your heart.

if you do book back2back cruises and need some "advice", let me know and I'll check my schedule (cruise fare is all the payment I need). I'll happily take the muprhy bed and I understand what a neck tie on the door handle means.

 

[Bree]

What was that book? Oh yeah.....