Would you be upset at the school (re: peanut allergy)?

[stephbillalec]

What's interesting is that a a person with a tree nut allergy will typically be allergic to ALL tree nuts.QUOTE]

Not true. My dd is peanut allergic and also had a tree nut allergy ~ but only to cashews and pistachios. All other tree nuts that we tested for were negative. She has since outgrown her tree nut allergy but unfortunately the peanut allergy is here to stay.

OP ~ you are not over reacting! We have a 504 plan for our daughter at her school. Check out peanutallergy.com for more info about allergies and schools. We have 10 epipens for her at school (one for each area of the school she's in, one for the nurse, etc.). We have written accomodations that clearly state that no peanut products are to be used in the classroom, she is not allowed to eat anything unless we send it in ourselves or if it is prepackaged with the ingredients clearly labeled and okay'd by an adult in charge. Peanut/tree nut allergies are VERY scary. Not only would I never want my daughter to go into anaphylaxis, I would never want any of the other children in her school to have to witness it. As long as the school does what they are supposed to, the chances of this happening are very, very slim.

 

[torinsmom]

North Carolina doesn't have any birds during the winter time? I guess they all came up here to Massachusetts, because we are refilling our 12" x 2" bird feeder every 3 or 4 days!

I didn't say we didn't have ANY, I said we didn't have nearly as many. That was even in the statement you quoted. I am a teacher and we have bird feeders in our garden. We refill about once a week in the winter, and about every 2 days in the spring and fall.

 

[EnchantedPrincess]

This may be a dumb question...but are you sure it was "peanut" butter. My daughter's daycare uses soy butter or sunbutter for this activity because they are a peanut free school. Just a thought...

Hmm...when i opened the bag, it definitely smelled like peanut butter but then again, I have no idea how soy butter or sunbutter smell like. I am going to ask some of the other moms on monday just to be sure before I go and talk to the director.

 

[hildarumpole]

Hmm...when i opened the bag, it definitely smelled like peanut butter but then again, I have no idea how soy butter or sunbutter smell like. I am going to ask some of the other moms on monday just to be sure before I go and talk to the director.

I have both soynut and sunbutter in the house. Neither smell like peanut butter to me. When my daughter did a bird feeder project in pre-k, I was told I had to supply the soynut butter alternative for the class if I wasn't comfortable with her being exposed to peanut butter, because it was beyond their normal budget and they didn't know where to buy it. It's possible your school has something besides peanut butter on hand for these projects, but unlikely given the extra cost and the fact that no one discussed safe alternatives with you prior to this incident. I'm glad your daughter didn't have a reaction. It's a good opportunity to sit down with the teacher and school administrators and put together a plan in writing so something like this doesn't happen again in the future.

 

[fishie]

I didn't say we didn't have ANY, I said we didn't have nearly as many. That was even in the statement you quoted. I am a teacher and we have bird feeders in our garden. We refill about once a week in the winter, and about every 2 days in the spring and fall.

 

[CTtwins]

I agree with all of the posters here, if that is peanut butter - you have every right to be upset.. And you should absolutely have a discussion with the preschool teachers.

I wanted to point out that not only was your daughter put at risk, but other children could have been to... my daughter was 8 months into preschool before we discovered she was allergic to peanuts and tree nuts... Thankfully our preschool had these policies in place for years and she was protected. It took her Mommy (ahem) feeding her peanut butter to figure it out.

 

[MiniGirl]

I dunno. I guess I'm in the minority. Now don't get me wrong. Somewhere along the line a terrible mistake was made and fortunately no harm came of it. However, I think you have been given a wonderful opportunity to educate your dd's school administrators and teachers. You haven't said if you know where the breakdown in communication came in. Did the teacher not inform her sub? Was there a family emergency and the director (or other personnel) call in the sub and not thoroughly inform them of the concerns in your dd's class? Did the sub bring this activity in on her own without the school knowing about it? Or as others have mentioned was it a planned activity that was deemed acceptable since nobody would be eating the peanut butter?

If it were me, I would explain what happen to the school's director and work with her to find out where the brokedown happened and determine what steps need to be taken to see that it doesn't happen again. I bet if you were to approach the director in a calm non-accusatory manner you will get a wonderful response. I would also bet the director will be truly sorry for what happened and even more diligent in the future to ensure it doesn't happen again to your dd or anyone else's child for that matter.

OP, do you have a right to be upset? Yes, absolutely. The real question is will you put the school on the defensive or will you take this opportunity to educate and advocate. Your call.

 

[DizneyBoomer]

Peanut butter and peanut products are not permitted in facilities ( daycare facilities, schools, etc ) with children age six and under, in our state. It's no joke. Some children cannot even smell the stuff without having a reaction.

Imagine my horror when I discovered that the daycare provider at the center my then 18-month-old grandson attends gave him peanut butter sandwiches regularly because he was a "poor eater." My son and daughter-in-law live in another state and apparently this daycare provider is ignorant of the danger peanut butter can be to a toddler.

To make it worse, my son and daughter-in-law just shrugged it off. I'm a former pre-K teacher and in no way, shape or form were peanut products allowed in our centers.

My son was rushed to the emergency room more times than I care to imagine with asthma and respiratory issues when he was a child. He should know better and realize that his child may be predisposed to allergies.

Yes, I can understand why you are angry. Given the chance, I would have read the riot act to my grandson's daycare provider and given her a quick education as to why she had no business feeding peanut butter to a baby.

 

[Nom]

I'm not saying that you should not be upset with the school, but knowing that this allergy exists.....you really need to stress to your child how important it is to stay away from peanuts.

Does your daughter know that she is allergic to peanuts? I understand that she is only 4 years old, but it sounds from your post that she knows that she should not come in contact with them.

I still think that the school is the one wholy at fault. My dd3 is also alergic to peanuts, and she knows to say that to people, and to stay away from peanuts, but if everyone is doing a fun project, she might forget and join in. She's only 3! It's up to the school to protect her.

Just think about all the things we tell our kids to stay away from: strangers, water, poison, strange animals, etc. Yes, we tell them what to do, and hopefully they remember, but when we bring a child to school I think the school is ultimately responsible for their well-being.

 

[Nom]

bumping for an update from the OP- did you speak with the school, and how did it go?

 

[Belle72]

.you really need to stress to your child how important it is to stay away from peanuts.

Does your daughter know that she is allergic to peanuts? I understand that she is only 4 years old, but it sounds from your post that she knows that she should not come in contact with them. At that age, we had an incident in preschool with someone eating bananas while sitting next to my son who was allergic to bananas. He knew that he was allergic and made such a scene in the classroom that no one ever ate another banana near him. We received a phone call from a quite upset and shaken teacher and the school nurse as well. We understood how serious allergies were because our son almost died from the chicken pox shot due to a severe allergic reaction. We understood that we would have to impress upon him the seriousness of the allergies as he would have to manage situations for himself....and avoid the items he was allergic to.

While you need to talk to the school....it is so much more important to talk to your child about not going near peanuts and the need to say something if someone who does not know puts them near her.

Children at 4 and 5 and even 6 do not remember to tell about an allergy, can be too shy, or do not even realize that they are having a reaction. They do not always know which products are peanut products. I really get so scared when I hear people talk about the child "taking responsibility" for their allergy- hello- they are children. They forget hats and mittens, they sometimes eat moonsand, they are not ready to be responsible- that is for the adults in their lives. Adults are there to protect them, teach them until they are ready. And a peanut allergy has the potential to cause a faster and more severe reaction than other allergies- it is known to be the most fatal allergy. While the child needs to be educated it is soley the responsibility of the adults in charge.