Would you be annoyed?

[NMAmy]

I'm going to have to go with the crowd on this one. You provided a nice selection. However, as you've seen from these posts, a lot of people have a particular drink they enjoy and, if given a choice and at their own expense, they'll stick with it.

I rarely drink and when I do have a beer, I'd rather pay for one that I'd enjoy than drink a free one I don't really care for. From your OP, your BIL didn't make a fuss or expect you to pay for his choice. It's no reflection on you or your hosting abilities. It merely means that people enjoy different drinks.

And I often bring my own beer to family parties. Since I only drink one, my nephew and niece and their SO's are appreciative that I'll fork out the bucks to avoid Bud or Miller and they get my other 5 beers.

 

[Kelrykengab]

I don't see a problem with it unless he made a scene or said something rude to you about it. Some people just like one or two types of drinks and don't see the point in drinking something they don't like. As long as he paid for it, then that is his problem not yours. He could have enjoyed free drinks, which you nicely provided, and chose not to. No biggie. Life is too short. Don't sweat it!

 

[Mickey's Minion]

Anyway OP, I would have ordered a vodka and cranberry or something like that. DH would have got a 7&7.
o
And frankly being from MO, your selection would not fit in here.
No Bud, Busch, or Bud Light? I don't care for your beer selection, sorry.

And I would have ordered a glass of chard as I prefer that over a Pinot Grigio.

As long as he was willing to foot his own bill, I don't see anything rude with what he did at all.

To answer your question, yes you are overreacting.

 

[Scurvy]

At a restaurant..ummm....the guests were not the ones being tacky.

If hostess did not want the open menu to be offered, then she probably should have taken it up with the restaurant so that the server would have known not to offer it. That isn't unheard of.

But in any case--it isn't rude b/c he paid for it on his own.

From the OP, it doesn't sound like the server did offer it. The server listed the choices that were provided, and the brother in law asked for something different.

For those that don't find this rude, would you feel differently if the OP had provided a set menu of food items and the brother in law chose instead to order something completely different? I admit that I find the drink thing somewhat rude, but I'd think it was far worse if he had ordered other food instead. (Again, though, that's assuming that he could eat the provided food and just didn't like it as well as the thing he ordered. If the host hadn't provided something he could eat, I would find the host terribly rude.)

 

[kirbydog48]

Why didn't you just have open bar? Personally, I wouldn't be thrilled with your beer selection either. If people are into darker microbrews, these are all very light/watery choices. I would have also preferred chardonney. Don't understand why there had to be such a limited selection.

 

[MrsJackSparrow4Life]

Ordering and paying for your own drink is considered rude to you?

I personally hate being at a party where there is nothing I like to drink being served, so unless your BIL expected you to pay for his tab or made a snotty comment about your drink selection, this is something that would never bother me.

Oh and remind me never to go to a party in the south if southern manners means I have to consume food or drink I don't like to be considered polite.

 

[disneystacy]

OP here, sorry my power went out and just came back on.

I see that the majority says no problem order what you want as long as you pays for it. Thats fine. I guess its just that he does stuff like this all the time.
If we pick a restaurant him and my sister complain and pick on anything and everything, then tell you about another place that is 10 times better. All while we are paying the tab.


I guess they figured since they didn't bring a gift, they would pay for their own drinks.

I still think they should have left the private room and went up to the bar to order separate drinks though, not make a announcement that they wanted something different. They were the only guests that did this.

Someone asked why we didn't have a open bar? We have many people we know that get carried away with themselves and order expensive scotch and such (can you guess who?) and would never in a million years ever reciprocate (cheap), so in keeping costs down, we provided the guests with the specials of the evening. No one except for 2 had a problem with this.

 

[disneystacy]

Again it wasn't and he could order what he wanted. You didn't pay for his drinks so you can't dictate his preference. I sense big control issues.

BTW I agree with LoraJ, as a gracious host I would have offered to pick up his tab. He was MY guest.

It would also be very nice if he ever picked up a tab for anything for me. My tab picking up days with him are over. Been there done that.

 

[LiLIrishChick63]

NORMALLY i would say it wouldn't bother me, but i have a DSIL that i can't stand....so i know where you're coming from. EVERYTHING irritates you when it comes to this person. i totally understand.

that's totally something my DSIL would do. and she'd do it JUST to irritate me to, not for any other reason.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

And I would have ordered a glass of chard as I prefer that over a Pinot Grigio.

As long as he was willing to foot his own bill, I don't see anything rude with what he did at all.

To answer your question, yes you are overreacting.

This thread is killing me now.

The reason I have to order a vodka drink now is because for whatever reason I cannot drink wine, sweet and sour mixes, and beer.....it really messes with me. I miss my wine.

Who needs a drink now?

 

[redlight]

I don't think you should be upset. He's particular, but it's not hurting you.

 

[vettechick99]

Me thinks this is not 100% about them ordering different drinks. Am I wrong in assuming you might have other issues with them?

BTW, just knowing the fact you stated in your first post, I would not be upset. Two less people for me to pay for!

 

[LiLIrishChick63]

This thread is killing me now.

The reason I have to order a vodka drink now is because for whatever reason I cannot drink wine, sweet and sour mixes, and beer.....it really messes with me. I miss my wine.

Who needs a drink now?

i have problems with beer sometimes. it'll give me a WICKED headache, even if i only have 2 beers. and sometimes even wine does it to me, too. so yeah, i agree with you on this. sometimes vodka is the only thing i can drink that doesn't give me too much of a problem.

 

[disneystacy]

Me thinks this is not 100% about them ordering different drinks. Am I wrong in assuming you might have other issues with them?

BTW, just knowing the fact you stated in your first post, I would not be upset. Two less people for me to pay for!

LOL, no its not just about ordering different drinks at this one party. You go to their home and they offer you corona to drink and then they come to your party and corona is no good, they need something "special". He did the same thing to my parents. They ordered lovely wine at a restaurant (yes he drinks this type of wine) and he had to order something different when he knew my parents were picking up the tab. He never offers to pick up the tab for anything EVER. Cheap.

 

[Mickey's Minion]

This thread is killing me now.

The reason I have to order a vodka drink now is because for whatever reason I cannot drink wine, sweet and sour mixes, and beer.....it really messes with me. I miss my wine.

Who needs a drink now?

Virtual wine. Guaranteed not to mess with someone Enjoy

 

[kathie859]

He either really wanted something else to drink (not on your menu) and paid for it himself OR
He really wanted you to be PO'd so he ordered something else to drink (not on your menu) and ended up paying for it himself.

I think it's a borderline rude of him not to take what was offered (what's wrong with a soft drink or a glass of water?) but ultimately he was in a public establishment (not at your home) and they had something he preferred. I hope the party was a success regardless of this incident.

 

[vettechick99]

LOL, no its not just about ordering different drinks at this one party. You go to their home and they offer you corona to drink and then they come to your party and corona is no good, they need something "special". He did the same thing to my parents. They ordered lovely wine at a restaurant (yes he drinks this type of wine) and he had to order something different when he knew my parents were picking up the tab. He never offers to pick up the tab for anything EVER. Cheap.

Thought so! So really you shouldn't be surprised by his behavior. I'm sure you had a lovely party. Next time forget him and invite your DIS friends. We'll drink whatever you serve!

(actually I'll drink whatever wine you have, but after a while I have to switch to Jager Bombs or I'll fall asleep - warning you now!).

 

[Mickey's Minion]

LOL, no its not just about ordering different drinks at this one party. You go to their home and they offer you corona to drink and then they come to your party and corona is no good, they need something "special". He did the same thing to my parents. They ordered lovely wine at a restaurant (yes he drinks this type of wine) and he had to order something different when he knew my parents were picking up the tab. He never offers to pick up the tab for anything EVER. Cheap.

But he did pick up the tab for his own extras.

I always consider restaurants as a place to get something special, maybe that more expensive microbrew or that $15.00 glass of wine that I don't usually drink at home.

Just because he drinks Corona at home, maybe he felt like treating himself to something special that night for the occasion.

You are taking this way, way, WAY too personally.

 

[LiLIrishChick63]

But he did pick up the tab for his own extras.

I always consider restaurants as a place to get something special, maybe that more expensive microbrew or that $15.00 glass of wine that I don't usually drink at home.

Just because he drinks Corona at home, maybe he felt like treating himself to something special that night for the occasion.

You are taking this way, way, WAY too personally.

what? the only time i'd EVER pay for a $15 glass of wine is if it was something like an anniversary or a birthday, i wouldn't just randomly go to a restaurant and order a $15 drink, that's insane!

 

[hrh_disney_queen]

My ex DSIL liked a very off -the -wall beer. She would bring her own if she was drinking anywhere. That would never bother me at all. IMO, if I am going to be killing brain cells, it's going to be with something I like. I'll have a Sea Breeze, please.