Before the very first wipe, I used to play with AZCat in Marleybone even before I got to Krokotopia. While I had a lot of fun, the XP was pretty bad. I don't know if that's still the case, but there was really no statistical benefit to jumping ahead.
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JUMPING IN ON ATTACKS
When you are doing the smaller little - Attack 4 Fire Elves - style fights. You actually have to hit one of them to get credit for the attack. So if people just jump into a fight and don't do anything they don't get credit. This has backfired on me a few times because people get in ahead of me in line and take out the beasty before I get a chance to get a shot in. Oh well. Technically I'm fighting their battle.
So, I think it's only the instanced area where you get the credit for the team.
I've been known to be wrong before though.
RANDOM TRADES
As for the comment about someone trading out of the blue. I added a friend because they helped me fight a battle and I thought they were friendly. As soon as I added them as a friend they gave me some crap trades.

Oh well, another part of the game.
NEW FRIEND CHAT
Does anyone know a whole lot about this new "True Friend" Chat? It seems like it is a replacement for the old "Secured Chat". I was hoping it would allow you a little more flexibility in chatting.