Why Won't You Give Up Your Seat on the Bus?

[FOV]

*** Soap box alert ***

I had the most infuriating experience on the subway this morning. A dad was on the subway with his 2 young sons (both under age 4) and NO ONE would give up their seat to help him out! I couldn't give up my seat because I was already standing. When the subway stopped short I thought the youngest son was going to go flying. I wish I wasn't so affected by this but I guess it is one of my pet peeves. Which reminds me....

Why does this same exact thing also happen on the Disney busses? I can't tell you how often we have been on the Disney busses when an older person or parent holding a baby or little children (ages under 4) or even someone on crutches boards and NO ONE offers their seat. It shocks me! It infuriates me!

One day leaving MK a dad got on the bus holding a sleeping baby. Again NO ONE gave up their seat. The observant bus driver politely asked if someone would be kind enough to offer their seat to this man and everyone remained seated. Did they not realize how dangerous it would be if the bus had to stop suddenly? Much to the dismay of the bus driver he had to announce that his bus was not going to budge unless this man was offered a seat. Finally a mother had her young child sit on her lap freeing up a seat.

I promise not to flame you - but if you are one of those people who don't give up your seat for the very young, very old, disabled.... can you please help me understand?

 

[AllyCatTapia]

there is a whole other thread about this somewhere with various excuses or reasons. maybe try a search?

 

[owtrbnks]

Even though I often give up my seat (I'm perfectly capable of standing for the short ride and know that there are other persons like my wife, who don't appear disabled, but can really use the seat due to a disability that is not obvious), I respect people who believe in EQUAL rights. If you have paid to go to WDW, you have as much right to the seat as anyone else. If they require a seat, they can always wait for the next bus (as we have), when they'll be near the front of the line and can get a seat. If the old folks and young folks can be at the park all day, they can surely stand for another 10 minutes back to the resort. I think the bus driver was wrong, he could have easily told the man to wait for the next bus if he required a seat. Now if the people taking up more than 1 seat were required to stand . . .

 

[Mississippian]

I've given up my seat plenty of times. I've also waited for another bus, and really that seems to be the best option for someone needing a seat.

 

[wee-haggis]

What annoys me more is the kids who are of an age that makes them more than capable of standing,take up all the seats while the elderly or folks with young kids have to stand.
Kids who are under 2 or 3 should not have their own seats (if other adults are standing). They should be sat on the lap of the sitting parents.
In my younger days there was never any question when this situation arose.
Its a sign of respect for your elders,good manners and etiquette.
As for the suggestion of waiting for the next bus,sure that is also an option but often you don't realize how full the bus is until you are walking down aisle looking for a seat.
I'm not saying that we should go back to the old ways of children being "seen and not heard", but in 2006 we sure have let all of the "adults rights" go out of the window in return for treating the kids like adults well before their time.

 

[chipscinderelly]

I've given up my seat plenty of times. I've also waited for another bus, and really that seems to be the best option for someone needing a seat.

unless you cannot tell there are no seats when you get on. Often there are seats in the back or appear to be seats which may be why they got on the bus. We too give up our seats and will be teaching our children to do the same.

 

[goofy4tink]

While there are many situations where people who are able to stand, don't and hence elderly, those with infants, have to stand, there are also situations where someone may look like they can stand but shouldn't! My dh looks pretty healthy, at 48. But, he has a really bad knee. If you just saw him sitting there, you would think, 'man, what a schmuck, why isn't he getting up?' But, if you had seen him getting to the bus, you would think differently. However, he still gets up and lets someone in need take his seat. Of couse, if that bus stops short, it's not going to be pretty when all 6'4" of him hurtles forward because his knee has buckled!!!
I will get up for an older woman, and at close to 57 myself, that's going some. I'm sure some of you would think that I am the older person who needs a seat!! My dd, almost 13, stands all the time, with no hesitation.

 

[musclecar_72]

People don't give up their seats on buses because the US is lacking in on thing that parents no longer teach their kids about, it's called a LITTLE CLASS!

 

[DisneyPhD]

I am normally one of those people that others give up a seat for (pregnant, or carrying a young child.) I have been very fortunate to get a seat most of the time. My DH can be carrying a sleeping 4 year old, a bag and a double stroller and never gets a seat though. Maybe it is the mind set that men don't need seats even if they have a small baby. I believe older people and young children should be offered seats.

Another issue can be that people are often "in their own little world" and are not really aware what is going on around them.

I try to be conscious of what is going on around me. My kids do not get their own seat unless there is no one standing (or open seats and the people choose to stand anyway.)

I really don't think it is a mater of "I got here 1st I deserve it more then the person in line behind me." It is a mater of common courtesy and that is more and more rare now a days.

Because of these bus issues DH and I tend to get a rental car more often now. It makes the ride home a lot easier and safer.

 

[stacy6552]

In 1997, there was a study that said, should Titanic go down, today one 1 in 3 men would give up their seat on a lifeboat for a woman or child. 'nough said?

 

[FOV]

I respect people who believe in EQUAL rights. If you have paid to go to WDW, you have as much right to the seat as anyone else.

Yes, but what about simple kindness? This thinking makes me incredibly sad but there are many folks who agree with you. I'm sorry but if I see an elderly person or someone on crutches etc... and my child told me they didn't want to give up their seat because of "equal rights" I would have a fit - actually I won't share with you what I would do! But, I appreciate you sharing your point of view and I will hold true to my promise not to flame.

If the old folks and young folks can be at the park all day, they can surely stand for another 10 minutes back to the resort. I think the bus driver was wrong, he could have easily told the man to wait for the next bus if he required a seat.

Well, we don't know the old folks and young folks were walking around the park all day. It is likely the young kids were in strollers. Besides, walking to an attraction is a bit different than keeping your balance on a moving bus. If I had been the bus driver I would not have felt comfortable having someone standing in an isle holding a baby. I would feel responsible if something were to happen and the baby was injured.

Wee-hagis - I agree that parents of young children should really try to hold their children on their laps if others are standing.

 

[ducklite]

If I get on a bus and get a seat, and an elderly (and I mean trouble with mobility elderly, not played 18 holes this morning elderly) person gets on, I'll give up my seat. If a little kid (under school age) I will give up my seat. If a very pregnant lady or someone holding a baby gets on I will give up my seat. (I won't give up my seat for a barely showing "baby bump.") If someone with an obvious physical or mental challenge that looks like they could use the seat more than me gets on, I'll give up my seat, but a teenager using hearing aids but who is otherwise able doesn't need it any more than I do.

I will NOT give up my seat just because someone has grey hair. I do too, it's just colored. I will not give up a seat for a kid old enough to go to school. We stood on the school bus as kids and all survived. I will not give up my seat to anyone rude enough to demand it or glare at me.

If I've already passed on one bus in order to be able to get a seat, I will not give up my seat for anyone. I'm hot and tired as well, and parents need to get a grip and leave with their kids before the parks close or the kids are dropping from exhaustion if getting a seat is that important to them--or wait for the next bus like I did.

I will also not give up my seat if my asthma or vertigo are bothering me. Maybe I look perfectly healthy, but I'm not. Both are conditions that unlike hot and tired kids can come on quickly and without warning, and be very debilatating.

Bottom line, while it's polite to give up a seat to someone who looks like they need it, no one should ever be expected to do so. Those who feel that they need a seat should plan appropriately to travel at off-peak times, or wait for the next bus to pull in. It's a two way street.

Anne

 

[Lewisc]

If I get on a bus and get a seat, and an elderly (and I mean trouble with mobility elderly, not played 18 holes this morning elderly) person gets on, I'll give up my seat. If a little kid (under school age) I will give up my seat. If a very pregnant lady or someone holding a baby gets on I will give up my seat. (I won't give up my seat for a barely showing "baby bump.") If someone with an obvious physical or mental challenge that looks like they could use the seat more than me gets on, I'll give up my seat, but a teenager using hearing aids but who is otherwise able doesn't need it any more than I do.

I will NOT give up my seat just because someone has grey hair. I do too, it's just colored. I will not give up a seat for a kid old enough to go to school. We stood on the school bus as kids and all survived. I will not give up my seat to anyone rude enough to demand it or glare at me.

If I've already passed on one bus in order to be able to get a seat, I will not give up my seat for anyone. I'm hot and tired as well, and parents need to get a grip and leave with their kids before the parks close or the kids are dropping from exhaustion if getting a seat is that important to them--or wait for the next bus like I did.

I will also not give up my seat if my asthma or vertigo are bothering me. Maybe I look perfectly healthy, but I'm not. Both are conditions that unlike hot and tired kids can come on quickly and without warning, and be very debilatating.

Bottom line, while it's polite to give up a seat to someone who looks like they need it, no one should ever be expected to do so. Those who feel that they need a seat should plan appropriately to travel at off-peak times, or wait for the next bus to pull in. It's a two way street.
Anne

or those people should rent a car.

I agree 100%.

 

[gigi1313]

What annoys me more is the kids who are of an age that makes them more than capable of standing,take up all the seats while the elderly or folks with young kids have to stand.
Kids who are under 2 or 3 should not have their own seats (if other adults are standing). They should be sat on the lap of the sitting parents.
In my younger days there was never any question when this situation arose.
Its a sign of respect for your elders,good manners and etiquette.
As for the suggestion of waiting for the next bus,sure that is also an option but often you don't realize how full the bus is until you are walking down aisle looking for a seat.
I'm not saying that we should go back to the old ways of children being "seen and not heard", but in 2006 we sure have let all of the "adults rights" go out of the window in return for treating the kids like adults well before their time.

while i have often given up my seat, held another's stroller (folded) while standing, encouraged my children to give up their seats (if they did not already do it on their own which they most often do), watched dh give up his seat if he even bothers to take one (which he usually doesn't), etc i have to politely disagree that adults are entitled to more "rights" than children... that is just an agist statement which can be compared to other predjudices...

giving up one's seat is polite, kind, compassionate, thoughtful, selfless, benevolent, etc but no one is more worthy or entitled due to age than another if their physical condition is equal (i.e. not: disabled, unsteady, holding a baby, etc)

now... about that "waiting for the next bus" option... we had a bus driver loading a very full bus and some people were opting to "wait" so they could get a seat and he said repeatedly that it was fine with him but whether we stand on the bus or stand at the bus stop we're still standing and at least if we're on the bus we'll be back to our resort (and able to sit down) that much sooner!

 

[gigi1313]

If I get on a bus and get a seat, and an elderly (and I mean trouble with mobility elderly, not played 18 holes this morning elderly) person gets on, I'll give up my seat. If a little kid (under school age) I will give up my seat. If a very pregnant lady or someone holding a baby gets on I will give up my seat. (I won't give up my seat for a barely showing "baby bump.") If someone with an obvious physical or mental challenge that looks like they could use the seat more than me gets on, I'll give up my seat, but a teenager using hearing aids but who is otherwise able doesn't need it any more than I do.

I will NOT give up my seat just because someone has grey hair. I do too, it's just colored. I will not give up a seat for a kid old enough to go to school. We stood on the school bus as kids and all survived. I will not give up my seat to anyone rude enough to demand it or glare at me.

If I've already passed on one bus in order to be able to get a seat, I will not give up my seat for anyone. I'm hot and tired as well, and parents need to get a grip and leave with their kids before the parks close or the kids are dropping from exhaustion if getting a seat is that important to them--or wait for the next bus like I did.

I will also not give up my seat if my asthma or vertigo are bothering me. Maybe I look perfectly healthy, but I'm not. Both are conditions that unlike hot and tired kids can come on quickly and without warning, and be very debilatating.

Bottom line, while it's polite to give up a seat to someone who looks like they need it, no one should ever be expected to do so. Those who feel that they need a seat should plan appropriately to travel at off-peak times, or wait for the next bus to pull in. It's a two way street.

Anne

AMEN!

 

[FOV]

Oh dear, I had *no* idea what I started! A previous poster mentioned there was another thread on this subject so I paged through about 5 pages and found an 11 page thread on this very subject. Guess it's a hot topic! And I thought I was the first!

I am glad those of you who refuse to give up their seat have shared your reasons - either on this thread or another. You have helped explain this phenomenon to me. I can't say I have come to the point where I will allow someone holding a baby to stand while I sit but I will try not to be so harsh in my judgement when I see this happen. I will try and I will be thinking of all of your reasons while I am doing it. Peace.

 

[susancl]

I always give up a seat if someone looks like they need it more than me. It feels good to give up a seat and it feels crappy to sit there and watch someone struggle. I don't care if they kept their kids in the park too long or they are only a "little" old or a "little" pregnant. If they need a seat more than I do, I get up. I don't mind being kind - I'm at Disney World!

 

[drogerstn]

I've seen people board the bus after being told that it was standing room only and that it was their option to load or wait. Surely these people didn't board expecting to have a seat offered to them...

 

[FOV]

I've seen people board the bus after being told that it was standing room only and that it was their option to load or wait. Surely these people didn't board expecting to have a seat offered to them...

My point of view was just being another warm body on the bus observing all this taking place. I can't recall ever being the one that was in need of the seat. From my vantage point it would always anger me when I saw someone in 'need' not being offered help from anyone - not necessarily Joe Blow in seat 5A (because we all know he may have some unobvious disability,) just anybody. I haven't really seen any posts from others saying they were waiting and/or expecting someone to give up their seat. We are just observers wondering why it is not being done. Does that make sense?

Funny, all these years I never really put time into factoring in the whole picture before offering my seat (hmmm... were they on the bus before or after the announcement....) when I see someone that looks like they could use the seat more than I do it is just automatic. You learn things everyday! Who knew all these complicated reasons for not offering your seat. No, that is not a flame, I really just never knew - my parents never offered me that loophole, lol.

Despite all these very valid reasons (hey, shoulda rented a car) I still think I will teach my 3 children to offer their seat and I hope they will get a nice feeling in their heart after they have done so. When I see someone I perceive to be in need of a seat and none is offered I will try to remember all these valid reasons for not offering a seat. Hope this makes me feel better. Thanks.

 

[drogerstn]

... We are just observers wondering why it is not being done. Does that make sense?

Yes

...

Despite all these very valid reasons (hey, shoulda rented a car) I still think I will teach my 3 children to offer their seat and I hope they will get a nice feeling in their heart after they have done so.

I agree

.... When I see someone I perceive to be in need of a seat and none is offered I will try to remember all these valid reasons for not offering a seat. Hope this makes me feel better...

I'll try as well but I think I'll still be overwhelmed with the feeling that some people keeping their seats are just not being considerate....